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Subject: "Mother's raising Sons" This topic is locked.
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M2
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10072 posts
Wed Mar-06-02 10:51 AM

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38. "Mother's raising Sons"
In response to In response to 0


          


Lot's of posts on this, so I thought I respond to them in aggregate.

For one thing, the "love your sons, raise your daughters" pattern exists in plenty of two-parent families as well, I think has more to do with how Blacks are approaching raising their kids, then whether or not the son has a father.

In fact, if the Father is loving his son and raising his daugther, he's making the situation WORSE then if he wasn't there. If he wasn't there, at least the son could look at some of his failures in life and Blame it on the lack of a father, *maybe* he'll use that as motivation to be a better man. If his father IS around, he might just accept his failures as "life" he might think that what he's doing is what being a man is all about.

I know too many sons who were raised by fathers that make excuses for other men that hit their wives or run out on their children, or think that being born with a Y chromosome deems them worthy of respect....as opposed to their actions.

In other words, plenty of young men run from their responsibilities who grew up with a father.

Just a thought......

As for Mother's raising sons, the thought occurs to me, WHO better to teach a son how to be a man, particularly with respect to women. Who else is going to have a more objective on what it means to be a man.....based on what she thinks a man should be with respect to her?

Do you think a woman who teaches her son to be a man, based on how she feels a man should treat her, is going to have a son who will run out on his kids?

I doubt it.

This whole idea that Mother's can't tell their sons what to do, or they can't teach them anything is bullshit (IMHO), there are far too many dead beat men raised by their fathers and responsible, strong men that people can be proud of that were raised by their mothers to believe otherwise.

Not to mention the fact that it's defeatist, since you're basically saying that the young men/boys in single parent homes are screwed.

The whole idea of "inserting Daddy into the situation" to fix things, gives the impression that men are the saviours that can save the community by their presence, it's disrespectful to the fathers that are good parents as opposed to fathers that just show up.

In the end, Kids need GOOD PARENTS, moreso then a parent of a specific gender. One good parent is always better (IMHO) then one so/so parent and one that just shows up.

People need to get off the whole "Black Man as the Saviour of the Community" and "Black Women as the baby factories of the community", the only thing that's going to save the community is if BOTH genders bust ass to become strong, intelligent vibrant members of society that have their shit together and handle their business.

Think about it, what's the pattern we have now?

The man aren't being raised to become strong members of society and are excused/forgiven for their mistakes, and you have men who are men physically, but mentally they are not ready to be men.

The women are being raised, but are being also taught to be caregivers that depend on the men who are often men in name only, sometimes when they try to achieve, they receive a "social cut" by their own family members/communities.

In essence, young boys and girls are being raised to be adults who can't neccessarily co-exist with each other, can't depend on each other, can't work together....

Sad isn't it?






Peace,







M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters [View all] , M2, Tue Mar-05-02 07:41 PM
 
Subject Author Message Date ID
not to post jack
Mar 05th 2002
1
However....
Mar 05th 2002
3
RE: However....
Keyser
Mar 08th 2002
78
asian patriarchy...
Mar 08th 2002
89
Not the same thing
Mar 06th 2002
4
agreeing w/ M2 and Solarus
Mar 06th 2002
22
Opinion
Mar 05th 2002
2
RE: Opinion
Mar 06th 2002
8
It shouldn't be flipped
Mar 06th 2002
5
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
6
There are always exceptions
Mar 06th 2002
7
i agree...
Mar 06th 2002
9
RE: i agree...
Mar 08th 2002
83
Because of Slavery
Mar 06th 2002
10
that's a lie.
Mar 06th 2002
13
RE: that's a lie.
Mar 06th 2002
16
The 60's.
Mar 06th 2002
19
      Does this mean
Mar 06th 2002
25
      Doesn't matter
Mar 06th 2002
28
           Does matter
Mar 06th 2002
45
                Lesbianism?
Mar 06th 2002
46
                RE: Lesbianism?
Mar 07th 2002
54
                     strong statement.
Mar 07th 2002
59
                     RE: strong statement.
Mar 07th 2002
68
                     RE: Lesbianism?
Mar 07th 2002
63
                RE: Does matter
Mar 07th 2002
53
                     Intertwined???
Mar 07th 2002
55
                     Once again...
Mar 07th 2002
58
                          Poor/ Low Income White People....
Mar 07th 2002
64
                          perception is reality...
Mar 07th 2002
65
                          Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
66
                               RE: Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
67
                                    RE: Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
69
                                         RE: Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
71
                                              RE: Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
72
                                              RE: Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
74
                                                   RE: Just proves my point
Mar 07th 2002
76
                                                        RE: Just proves my point
Mar 08th 2002
87
                                              RE: Just proves...cont.
Mar 07th 2002
75
                                              RE: Just proves...cont.
Mar 08th 2002
86
                                                   RE: Just proves...cont.
Mar 08th 2002
90
                                                        RE: Just proves...cont.
Mar 08th 2002
91
                                              interesting point...
Mar 08th 2002
80
                     RE: Does matter
Mar 08th 2002
84
                          Ghetto=Black?
Mar 08th 2002
85
      to follow up on Cre8's statement
Mar 06th 2002
27
           the problem...
Mar 06th 2002
29
Hmmm. You're suspect.
Mar 06th 2002
17
suspect of what?
Mar 06th 2002
18
During Slave Times...
Mar 06th 2002
33
      RE: During Slave Times...
Mar 06th 2002
35
           RE: During Slave Times...
Mar 06th 2002
41
           The Truth.
Mar 07th 2002
60
                RE: The Truth.
Mar 07th 2002
62
                     RE: The Truth.
Mar 07th 2002
70
                          RE: The Truth.
Mar 07th 2002
73
           RE: During Slave Times...
Mar 06th 2002
48
                RE: During Slave Times...
Mar 07th 2002
61
Post #21
Mar 06th 2002
23
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
11
this needs to be taken care of
Mar 06th 2002
24
you have a point...
Mar 06th 2002
12
Sad Truth
Mar 06th 2002
14
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
15
Fortitude, Brotherhood & Honor...
Mar 06th 2002
20
Another sad thing
Mar 06th 2002
21
most detrimental to ANY child
Mar 06th 2002
26
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
30
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
31
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
32
      umm
Mar 06th 2002
42
      RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
47
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
34
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Mar 06th 2002
36
Its a ILL situation
Mar 06th 2002
40
starts when they're young
Mar 06th 2002
37
Read posts 3 & 4
Mar 06th 2002
39
      sons aren't raised
Mar 06th 2002
43
I agree totally
Mar 06th 2002
44
Qualms with the statement
Mar 06th 2002
49
RE: Mother's raising Sons
Keyser
Mar 08th 2002
79
Bullshit
Mar 08th 2002
82
that is the fuckin TRUTH
Mar 08th 2002
81
Manhood classes
Mar 06th 2002
50
Good suggestion
Mar 07th 2002
51
RE: Manhood classes
Mar 07th 2002
56
RE: AFRICAN'S
Mar 07th 2002
52
RE...
Mar 07th 2002
57
RE: Love Their Sons, Raise their Daughters
Keyser
Mar 08th 2002
77
IN YOUR FAMILY
Mar 08th 2002
88

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