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Subject: "note to self: cypher (re-mix)" This topic is locked.
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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 05:11 AM

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"note to self: cypher (re-mix)"


  

          

"This is the re-mix!" LOL Alright people you know the drill. Write to a part of yourself that you've been meaning to speak to for a minute but just haven't for one reason or another in any form (no restrictions) Like I said before "The concept alone is poetry in itself"

Dear Johna

I've been meaning to speak to you for a minute now. It's just I find it hard to talk to you sometimes because you always seem so stressed. I think you should take a break (From stressing I mean) Baby I know your tired and you just want to lay down and not have to think about somethings but just be patient. It will all work out fine. Your always so busy, always have to find something to do (You shouldn't work so hard) Things aren't going to fall a part if you rest for a minute (I promise) just let me help you. I'm sorry I couldn't save you, I really wish I could have. I tried, you know I did, but I was just too weak. You don't have to be so perfect you know. People like you just the way you are but I can't seem to get you to understand that. Why do you have to be so stubborn? He loves you you know so you don't have to try so hard. You don't have to work for his love. I know your scared but everything will be alright if you just let him love you. Come from behind your comfort zone and let him in completely. I promise he won't bite. I would like to say more but it seems as if I'm at a loss for words and nothing is coming out right but just do me this one favor. Live. Ok? I love you (I truley do).

-Mara

* As far as the missing thread goes don't worry about it (It's no thing) Just post your words and keep on trucking. Lets just hope you cat's save your shit on the regular (LOL) *




*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
good idea.. keepin it real
Jul 30th 2003
1
RE: good idea..
Jul 30th 2003
6
RE: good idea..
Jul 30th 2003
13
You know?
Jul 31st 2003
43
Dear Sexuality
Jul 30th 2003
2
RE: Dear Sexuality
Jul 30th 2003
7
RE: Sexuality
Jul 30th 2003
22
Oh My
Jul 30th 2003
8
Sexuality
Jul 31st 2003
44
Dear William,
Jul 30th 2003
3
RE: William,
Jul 30th 2003
5
RE: Dear William,
Jul 30th 2003
14
RE: Dear William,
Jul 30th 2003
25
LOL
Jul 31st 2003
45
Dear Intellect
Jul 30th 2003
4
Exactly!
Jul 31st 2003
46
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Jul 30th 2003
9
wow.....
Jul 30th 2003
10
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Jul 30th 2003
11
wow squared
Jul 30th 2003
15
well
Jul 30th 2003
16
RE: well
Jul 30th 2003
27
Aww
Jul 31st 2003
47
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Aug 17th 2003
79
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Jul 30th 2003
12
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Jul 30th 2003
18
      just
Jul 30th 2003
19
      Hm
Jul 31st 2003
48
Dear Pussy
Jul 30th 2003
17
Oh My God!
Jul 30th 2003
20
it's Mystic_Elixir...
Jul 30th 2003
21
lmao!
Jul 30th 2003
23
RE: Dear Pussy
Jul 31st 2003
31
Whoa!
Jul 31st 2003
49
My Oh My....
Aug 01st 2003
59
      RE: My Oh My....
Aug 03rd 2003
61
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Jul 30th 2003
24
Alright
Jul 31st 2003
50
RE: Alright
Aug 01st 2003
57
nice flip
Aug 06th 2003
67
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Aug 07th 2003
70
awesome ladies!!!! and gents!
Jul 30th 2003
26
Dear Lord...
Jul 30th 2003
28
RE: Lord...
Jul 31st 2003
30
Co-sign
Jul 31st 2003
51
RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)
Jul 30th 2003
29
Just to clear up any confusions.
Jul 31st 2003
32
ms. attitude
Jul 31st 2003
33
RE: attitude
Jul 31st 2003
36
Mara
Jul 31st 2003
34
I applaud you
Jul 31st 2003
37
Some after thoughts:
Jul 31st 2003
42
*speechless*
Jul 31st 2003
39
RE: *speechless*
Jul 31st 2003
40
      RE: *speechless*
Jul 31st 2003
41
RE: Mara
Aug 01st 2003
55
      yes
Aug 01st 2003
56
Dear Depression
Jul 31st 2003
35
RE: Dear Depression
Jul 31st 2003
38
RE: Dear Depression
Aug 01st 2003
54
Dear Balik
Jul 31st 2003
52
Dear heart
Jul 31st 2003
53
heart of gold steel platium silver plastic wood charcoa
Aug 01st 2003
58
..she used too...
Aug 01st 2003
60
awe....
Aug 04th 2003
62
mystic
Aug 04th 2003
63
My dear love angel ToeJam...
Aug 04th 2003
64
up
Aug 06th 2003
65
good
Aug 06th 2003
66
      RE: good
Aug 07th 2003
68
Get it together.
Aug 07th 2003
69
RE: Get it together.
Aug 12th 2003
73
      RE: Get it together.
Aug 12th 2003
74
           RE: Get it together.
Aug 17th 2003
77
to: my heart
Aug 07th 2003
71
sonrisa
Aug 08th 2003
72
B~4 This Falls Off Into 7th Heaven --
Aug 17th 2003
75
good idea
Aug 17th 2003
76
Dear Fear,
Aug 17th 2003
78

robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 05:27 AM

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1. "good idea.. keepin it real"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

dear robynchild,

mmm, i see you've been in your head alot lately. pushing everyone aways to make it all better for yourself cuz you don't think anyone can help you find your peace. you put on such a friendly face and everyone tells you how sexy you are but you never believe it, why don't you see it girl, what's got you so hemmed up? and i understand that you've been working yourself too hard. putting too much on your shoulders like your a single mother. maybe it's cuz your single mother is a wreck and you can't face that truth... that you only have yourself to depend on... that's hurt you so long. that she's not what you need or want her to be. i know you wake up everyday thinking bout what a waist she's been to you. literally. don't avoid what supports you. don't run anymore from the things that hurt you. i know your strong. everyone else depends on you for it and i know you hide your pain all too well. they're all amazed at how you turned out despite the things you've endured. don't let em down now.. you'll make it outta the jungle alive with want you've always wanted by your side.
until next time.. chin up...

love always.....
your inner you

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 06:28 AM

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6. "RE: good idea.."
In response to Reply # 1


          

thanks for the personal look into your thoughts. You know, you remind me of myself. I've lived most of my life moreso inside my head and heart rather than out in the world. 27 years that is, until I met my salvation.

"you'll make it outta the jungle alive with want you've always wanted by your side."

---and I finally did it. you'll make it outa the jungle and thrive and thank God every and all day that you are alive! Trust.




______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:29 AM

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13. "RE: good idea.."
In response to Reply # 6


  

          

gives me strength to know that i am not the only one...
thank you.

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:19 AM

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43. "You know?"
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

Like we figured out today our reasoning for certain behaviors are in unison. It's always nice to know that your feelings are not alien to at least one other person. Thank you for that.

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 06:10 AM

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2. "Dear Sexuality"
In response to Reply # 0


          

Dear Sweet Sexuality,

I’ve been meaning to address you; to undress you, let you lay sunny side up sweet morning love breakfast for Latin husband lips to devour. My dear sexuality, I admire the way you switch and swing and sing soliloquies from my hips. You are so strong, so powerful, so wild, so free, free falling from high cums into pools of ethereal bliss. I love you, my healthy, intense sexuality. I am grateful that you are with me. You show yourself in my deep eyes, in my sensual gaze, in my index as it traces the top if my glass. You run down y back as it arches perfect form. You cover my hips like hands rocking me slowly back and forth against love. You blanket my bones with soft caramel. You S H O U T with my every movement and my stillness. You make men weak, and women. You are beautiful my sweet sexuality.

Love Janelle




______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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Amai_1
Member since May 27th 2002
296 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 07:44 AM

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7. "RE: Dear Sexuality"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

Go girl, witcha' badself! LOL





-----------------------------
The day you can judge someone is the day you can become them...Until then, it's all speculation

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:56 AM

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22. "RE: Sexuality"
In response to Reply # 7


          

lol, you silly girl lol. when are you gonna post a note to self? I'm curious to see how you talk to yourself.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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KnowOne
Charter member
39940 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 07:54 AM

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8. "Oh My"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

! LOL

_________________________________________
"Too weird to live.... too rare to die..."

IG: KnowOne215 | PS+ ID: KnowOne215

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:28 AM

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44. "Sexuality"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

I've been meaning to address mine as well. In my home it's not discussed and the views on sex are very conservative. I'm the same way as well but in an intimate setting conservative is not my approach of choice. I intend to complete a piece concerning my sensual side so it won't need to be "a-dressed" for long (A little jokey-joke right there LOL)

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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KnowOne
Charter member
39940 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 06:11 AM

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3. "Dear William,"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Dear William,

why do you force
others to wallow
in your irrepressible angst?
here is my sappy poem.
whine.
moan.
woe is me.
(insert typo here)
i can use
drastic S P A C I N G
to make my point
(insert computer shorthand here)
i hate myself.
i was abused as a kid
no one loves me.
whine piss & moan.
perhaps i can
write at length about
s u i c i d e
(insert trite phrase about loneliness)
because i am ohsotouchy

sob.

your nothing but a
confused
struggling
desperate
shell of a human.

shut
the
hell
up!

your poetry is horrible.

pain does not always equal great art.

now, go write something worth while.

Sincerely,
KnowOne AKA your Id

_________________________________________
"Too weird to live.... too rare to die..."

IG: KnowOne215 | PS+ ID: KnowOne215

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 06:23 AM

Click to send private message to this authorClick to view this author's profileClick to add this author to your buddy list
5. "RE: William,"
In response to Reply # 3


          

"your poetry is horrible."

---I disagree. I like this piece, you seem to interact with yourself back and forth throughout it.





______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:31 AM

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14. "RE: Dear William,"
In response to Reply # 3


  

          

awe.. don't kick too hard, that may cause internal bleeding.

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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Nowachaoticthing
Member since Dec 24th 2002
2178 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 09:40 AM

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25. "RE: Dear William,"
In response to Reply # 3


  

          

Your poetry is NOT horrible!

"To be a poet is a condition, not a profession."
- Robert Frost

http://inevitabletruth.blogspot.com/
http://www.lulu.com/content/187759
http://www.hdfest.com/Barry/allreviewsbarry.html
http://wishbonec.wordpress.com/

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:38 AM

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45. "LOL"
In response to Reply # 3


  

          

I hate to laugh at something so serious but I got this Daria type vibe from it. I felt like you were being sarcastically truthful about the whole matter but just really dry about it (Like "blah") hence the humor I found in it. I've been like this before so I relate to the fullest. I would go into the idea about your poetry being horrible but you already know what I think.

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 06:20 AM

Click to send private message to this authorClick to view this author's profileClick to add this author to your buddy list
4. "Dear Intellect"
In response to Reply # 0


          


Dearest Intellect,

You are amazing, so impressive! You wrap yourself around my pen and squeeze it until it bleeds out truisms of life, love, loss, and everything in-between. You are a powerful force; you make my vocal chords proud to house your desires. You cant spell * lol* never could, but your vocabulary is enormous. You are philosophical, political, Artistic, and every other possibility. You are rich dear intellect, rich and beautiful. You tempt tongues to debate. You beg self to escalate. You fold fallibilities into nonexistence. You exist in a parallel universe where plateaus do not, only mountains. I adore you dear intellect!


Love Janelle



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:41 AM

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46. "Exactly!"
In response to Reply # 4


  

          

As much as I don't like to discuss my talents I have to admit that I have a way with words and my mind tends to amaze me sometimes. Your sentiments are shared.

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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Nowachaoticthing
Member since Dec 24th 2002
2178 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:15 AM

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9. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-30-03 08:18 AM

  

          

Hey man,

I wrote you a malicious letter a few days ago, but somehow, the words were erased. While I don't regret what was said, I hope that we both can move past it. I only said those things because I love you. Sometimes we have to tell loved ones the truth, no matter the cost.

Damn, it's kinda surreal when you really think about it. I mean, think about it for a sec. In the blink of an eye, my letter to you was obliterated. It is as if I never wrote it. I wonder if that's what frightens you most about death? Being forgotten? Being alone? Leaving with words unsaid while accomplishing nothing of any value?

You are 30 years old.

No statues will be erected in honor of the glorious naval battles that you never fought. You will not be admitted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame (I'm assuming that you had to at least wear a helmet once or twice for that one). Most of your childhood goals and dreams perished, stillborn. You have written and will write enough tales of sorrow and regret to fill the Library of Congress. Twice.

When you leave this existence, those few who you have allowed into your heart will mourn your loss, until they depart this world as well. Then, it will be as if someone accidentally deleted your writings from the page.

Kinda makes you wonder what's the point, doesn’t it?

You're born, you suffer, you struggle, you laugh, you cry, you love, you despise, you deny, you write, and ultimately, you die. Unless you have contributed something significant or profound to this world, you will not be remembered. How long will you be here? Sixty, seventy, eighty years, if you're lucky and lay off the booze? In the grand scheme of things, your lifespan might as well be equivalent to a fruitfly.

In the end, all you can really hope for is that some underpaid, uninspired public school teacher reads to her class an obscure piece of poetry written by a bitter, mediocre, unfulfilled, perpetual dreamer. Your rhetorical ramblings of woe could captivate and, more likely, bore an audience of uninterested high school literature students for decades, or even centuries, long after you have left this earth. If you leave that singular legacy behind, consider yourself extremely fortunate.

But you really shouldn't concern yourself with such things. Rejoice, for you are 30 YEARS OLD. You have reached a stage where all that really matters is the pursuit of happiness and helping others. If you waste too much more time dreaming, scheming, and regretting, you will forget to LIVE.

Indulge yourself in feeling the warmth of the sun as it begins to waver at the horizon. Don't just watch the sunset; DRINK it with ALL of your senses. When you share a kiss with your lady, inhale her scent and melt into her flesh as if it were the last time, everytime. Learn how to forgive those who have hurt you and extract that poison. Sure, vengance and anger were great motivational tools, but you made it through the darkness, so you no longer need them.

Yeah... that's my most important request to you. Learn how to be happy.

May peace enter your heart and sooth the scars. I love you.

"To be a poet is a condition, not a profession."
- Robert Frost

http://inevitabletruth.blogspot.com/
http://www.lulu.com/content/187759
http://www.hdfest.com/Barry/allreviewsbarry.html
http://wishbonec.wordpress.com/

  

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KnowOne
Charter member
39940 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:18 AM

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10. "wow....."
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

>May peace enter your heart and sooth the scars. I love you.

Amen to that.

Keep Flowin'....

_________________________________________
"Too weird to live.... too rare to die..."

IG: KnowOne215 | PS+ ID: KnowOne215

  

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Amai_1
Member since May 27th 2002
296 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:22 AM

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11. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

I like this.... It made me think





-----------------------------
The day you can judge someone is the day you can become them...Until then, it's all speculation

  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:37 AM

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15. "wow squared"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

that was by far the most gut renching realistic thing to have been written.. u should save that for your kids.. grandkids... neighbors, people you care for... whoever.. top quality.

fame isnt' the only thing people get remembered for.... you know this kid...

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:38 AM

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16. "well"
In response to Reply # 9


          

very deep, a call to more than surfce thought. I like that. I liked the first piece you did, it was very exposed. This was just as wonderful, though a little less exposed. But it's better that you did it this way instead of rehashing the negativity you already talked to yourself about, you said it, it was heard and you moved on. And it's 30 years YOUNG! lol, i'm on my way there, so dont call it old! lol. And you will be remembered, we all will, maybe not by name or occupation, or physical contributions, but you will touch someones life, several someones lives and they will change because of knowing you and that will lend them the ability to touch and change someone else and there will be an entire chain that never would have started if it weren't for you... for all of us. Much Love.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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Nowachaoticthing
Member since Dec 24th 2002
2178 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 07:57 PM

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27. "RE: well"
In response to Reply # 16


  

          

I'm glad you liked the 1st piece. I almost didn't post it. It seemed too revealing to me. Fortunately, or unfortunately, The thread got deleted, and that was the one time that I didnt save a backup (I shot from the hip with that one. I rarely save those.)

Of course, If anyone copied it, I'd be most grateful If they could inbox me with it so I can save it and show it to my kids someday.

"To be a poet is a condition, not a profession."
- Robert Frost

http://inevitabletruth.blogspot.com/
http://www.lulu.com/content/187759
http://www.hdfest.com/Barry/allreviewsbarry.html
http://wishbonec.wordpress.com/

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:53 AM

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47. "Aww"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

I'm a little upset that the first post turned up missing because your first letter was stellar to say the least. The approach you took in this one was a great compliment to the former and I wish we still had it to compare. I think both deserved to be archived. You are a better writer than you give yourself credit for (Honestly you are) You might make it in my signature again (And I'm serious about that) just as soon as I find something to quote.

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Sun Aug-17-03 09:16 AM

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79. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

damn u are a good writer, so clear and real


Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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slicklyric
Member since Feb 13th 2003
413 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:28 AM

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12. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 0


          

dear me....

ahh fuck it-what the hell are u doing...ur crazy talking to urself, what cant find no-one else to listen to ya oh-the-world-did-me-wrong-ish?????.what u gonna whine at me--"stop being so cruel" ahahahaaa i protected you, you can never leave me-i am you! i am the silence you birthed-now live with it!
ur pathetic u make me laugh......now fuck off and let the real poets get on with their work cos ur not ready to hear the truths i have to say to you.

love, the-voice-inside-ya-head x


"when a man aims at nothing, he seldom misses the target"

"absence of occupation, is not rest"

"write it down. the worst ink survives the best memory"

  

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slicklyric
Member since Feb 13th 2003
413 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:46 AM

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18. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 12
Wed Jul-30-03 08:47 AM

          

grrr, shut the fuck up, stop putting me down.....u dont know me....ur jus the negative part that gets a hold everytime i slip on reality.
jus shut up, cos actually ur not bad, u have strenght, as a child u were strong, this is what papa and mums taught u and u will live, u will go forth and shine their love. jus slow down for a sec things will work out, the darkness will clear, ur still young, ur gonna become a woman and one day it'll be ok...jus hold tight, love will guide u, dont slip, jus hold tight.

love, the-voice-in-your-heart x

"when a man aims at nothing, he seldom misses the target"

"absence of occupation, is not rest"

"write it down. the worst ink survives the best memory"

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:48 AM

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19. "just"
In response to Reply # 18


          

hold on. advice for all on quest.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:56 AM

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48. "Hm"
In response to Reply # 18


  

          

A little Jekyle and Hyde going on? It's cool I can relate (No doubt).

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:45 AM

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17. "Dear Pussy"
In response to Reply # 0


          

Dear Pussy,

Sweet pussy, sweet, wet pussy. You are BEAUTIFUL! You lay lovely in my center whispering my man lullaby. Big juicy lips, big pretty pink clit calling conversation from tongue. You take love in your arms and squeeze it tight. You are underground-railroad home for first born. You are beautiful. I LOVE my pussy, my pussy speaks volumes of profundity. My pussy-cat purrs when you stroke it, it purrs in powerful octaves of red and orange and Heaven. Sometimes she is a soft white lily, sometimes a deep red rose and sometimes a sexy purple orchid, but she is always BEAUTIFUL.

Loving you,
Janelle




______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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KnowOne
Charter member
39940 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:51 AM

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20. "Oh My God!"
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

:-P

_________________________________________
"Too weird to live.... too rare to die..."

IG: KnowOne215 | PS+ ID: KnowOne215

  

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MayoKing
Charter member
3364 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:54 AM

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21. "it's Mystic_Elixir..."
In response to Reply # 17


          

and the Amazing Technicolor DreamPussy

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's good to be the King.

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 08:58 AM

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23. "lmao!"
In response to Reply # 21


          

you foolish *lol* Post one Mayo!



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 04:08 AM

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31. "RE: Dear Pussy"
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

oh girl.. your too much LOL.. nice piece.. interesting interaction with the pussy animated.. LOL...

god what an imagination U have!!!

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:58 AM

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49. "Whoa!"
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

This is what happens when you say "no restrictions" I see you're taking full advantge of that (Proceed)



*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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My Pretty Eyez
Member since Dec 31st 2002
138 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 10:09 PM

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59. "My Oh My...."
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

...Can I get a picture of that? Go on Girl!!! Rejoice in the beauty we possess. I loved this .... it's not often we think of our pussy's and how much she really does for us. Wahoo!!!

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
"Loving someone deeply gives you courage. Being loved deeply gives you strength."


"You can't kick off in a smurfs ass... you ain't tough..." -Nowachaoticthing (in response to one of my many idle threats to beat his ass)

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Sun Aug-03-03 01:47 PM

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61. "RE: My Oh My...."
In response to Reply # 59


          

lol, thanks girl!



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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clarion
Member since Jul 07th 2003
9469 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 09:24 AM

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24. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Dear Danette:

· Yesterday’s blues no longer look good on you
· Kiss your son when u get home
· Pick something up to eat for dinner
· Watch Emperor’s Groove with Chris
· Leave bed, kitchen, living room, and front hallway to self
· Give cat fresh water….
· Dance by yourself
· Look in mirror and smile for u
· Give u a hug
· Leave hair in ponytail
· Go get an ice cream cone after dinner and walk tomorrow

Love Always,
Chandra

(very strange 1st time doing this)

..

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 11:19 AM

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50. "Alright"
In response to Reply # 24


  

          

Your approach was a little bit different from the rest of ours but that is a very good thing. I said any form and that is what I got. It reflects how you were thinking (To the point) I like(Indeed)

>(very strange 1st time doing this)

Don't even worry about it (It's no thing)

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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clarion
Member since Jul 07th 2003
9469 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 07:03 AM

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57. "RE: Alright"
In response to Reply # 50


  

          

thanks ma trying....

..

  

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delsbrothergeorge
Charter member
4413 posts
Wed Aug-06-03 12:59 PM

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67. "nice flip"
In response to Reply # 24


          

it's actually a note, but it has as much poignancy as the rest.


---i'm here---

"...do what scares you..." -- l. varela

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Thu Aug-07-03 09:52 AM

Click to send private message to this authorClick to view this author's profileClick to add this author to your buddy list
70. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 24


          

I liked the approach you took to this, and I liked this line a lot "· Yesterday’s blues no longer look good on you" I felt that! Much Love.




______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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Ezzsential
Charter member
11085 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 01:37 PM

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26. "awesome ladies!!!! and gents!"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

this was a wonderful exercise.. ima have to join.. gimme some time =)
my peice "but" was kinda like this though.
i dream. i reality. i dream. i reality.


-Stephani

I'm a H.E.R.B.
Holotyped Existance
Rhetoric Bound

the new me is like: A woman killed in ruffles; falling to the ground with her hair spread out; her wrist secreting ambiant neon blood
Juggling the moon and stars in palms; with the flecks in the eyes turning confetti like
Running in barefoot brooks; with the moon arching its reflection on emotional strain
Renewing again amoungst the mating mossrocks stay satiated coining a pith in a breathy palms; so so sappy dreanching destiny to bloody toned walls



the colors were NEVER accurate!and people dont go thru people!


my music:
www.soundclick.com/sylana
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Brb8g8f18xE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NgNuVHrEKI

  

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Otto
Member since Dec 19th 2002
4624 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 09:35 PM

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28. "Dear Lord..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

The earth is round, and it seems to me that our axis is sin...more personally, my axis seems to be sin. Everyday, i pray, that you will give me sufficient strenngth to tunn a blinnd eye to temptation, and as your word says: "I die daily....". For this Lord, i am sorry, and your word says..."If you love me, obey my cccommandment", but it seems as if i dont love you...Forgive me lord...Forgive me...I do love you, thanks for another day of life, as sinful as it may be...

-Your Son,

-Otto

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 01:22 AM

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30. "RE: Lord..."
In response to Reply # 28


          

*smile* nice prayer. I'm sure we all feel that way sometimes, but you know, the point of the exercise was to write to yourself, not God or anyone else. it's a note to self. You could have written this to your sins begging them to leave you alone, or the sinful side of yourself etc. But I liked what you wrote anyway. Much Love.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 11:27 AM

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51. "Co-sign"
In response to Reply # 28


  

          

I've had these thoughts too (I feel you)

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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UntitledThought
Member since Jul 05th 2003
353 posts
Wed Jul-30-03 11:26 PM

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29. "RE: note to self: cypher (re-mix)"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

ran into a figment of my past from
1095 and some change...surreal...in retrospect...

maybe you've run into this person because God's tryna show YOU how much you've grown...

lately you've been wandering aimlessly feeling blurry, unrecognized, unknown...feeling not quite like yourself.

and yet you were conceivably so, 3 years ago...

running into him seemed destined in this path of life...

look at chance not choice.

look at the odds (aka be optimistic)...

you NEVER go there.

you spoke of him just hours before.

you're newly detached (although not your choice).

genuine interest cannot be hidden in the eyes...especially in yours, dummy.

connected, respected, departed, restarted.

appreciate it...

true love begins with friendship.

build a block. if he takes it down, then it just shows you how much you've grown and possibly how much he's regressed.

you've grown. as Com says, 'only in memory can i hug her.'

embrace who she was...but appreciate who she's become.

aight?

------------------------------


'it's like i'm
fightin for freedom, writin for freedom...' -Common

'God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.'

James 4:6

  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 05:42 AM

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32. "Just to clear up any confusions."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

For those who didn't read "What's Really In A Name?" by Clarion this is an explaination of who Mara really is:

It's the last four letters of my middle name. Mara means "bitter" in more than one language. I chose it because I never had a nickname and it was easy to remember. I didn't know what it meant until one day I decided to look it up. Ironically enough I AM a bitter woman (I can thank "daddy" for that one) but I don't live my life as such. "Mara" is actually the side of me that would like to show her face often but is afraid to so she doesn't (My vulnerable side) Until I started writing I never expressed my bitterness (Or any other emotions of the like) in any form so she lives through my work. When I write I allow myself to be vunerable because I generally don't on the regular. "Mara" is my little secret.

With that being said when I refer to her in these letters I am refering to the side of me that feels, the weaker part of me (In some cases). She gets to feel things that "Johna" won't allow herself to. Sometimes the two tend to overlap but I think you get the point. And no, I don't have D.I.D. (LOL) Everyone has more than one side to them it's just that this one happens to have a name.

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 06:16 AM

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33. "ms. attitude"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

dear ms. attitude,

i'm glad that i can be part of your psyche. i'm that part of you that has gotten you through most days when shit just wants to shut down. i got you babe. you know that silver lining is coming. that the cloud nine is right around the corner. it may be in the form of a laugh, a lil girl in the market who busts a shy smile behind her mom at you. a chain letter from your best friend that just says she's caring is some cheese-ass way. a cute boy that says hi. i'm telling yout that nothing is as it seems and the some people deserve the benefit of the doubt.they are tryin to help the situation. <shut up> no.. you need to stay positive cuz.. <shut up> when people give you bullshit you just need to listen. put that attitude down and have a seat next to me and see that there is a grander plan to it all besides this one moment of frustration. because all moments are fleeting. and tomorrow will be a memory, you won't remember what you ate for lunch. let alone what your angry about. let it go. make something inside yourself laugh..... change your thinking and the world will seem magically different.

love r.optimist

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 06:45 AM

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36. "RE: attitude"
In response to Reply # 33


          

"all moments are fleeting. and tomorrow will be a memory,"

---nice, and true!



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 06:17 AM

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34. "Mara"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I realized that I have been killing myself slowly. Like right now I'm shaking, my body is weak and I need to eat but I have yet to do so. I think that those times that I chose not to eat have now become habit and slowly but surely I am killing myself. Intentional or not I'm not sure, I will figure that out soon. It might be intentional cause if we gonna be honest I don't like my physical self. I love the lady inside me, but the woman she's living in I don't care too much for. I have many imperfections and thats all I see when I look at myself. I always say that I want someone who will love me regardless of how I look, but in my mind that leaves me with someone of low quality because what man of high caliber would want what I have to offer? I want a certain someone because if I'm seen with them then maybe they will be like "what is it about her that makes them want to be with her?" and that would make them be curious about me and maybe except me (That's that highschool mentailty). The idea comes out shallow but it all boils down the this, I want love, security, and acceptance. I want to be genuinely loved, feel secure with myself, and feel accepted for everything that I am because right now I don't have any of those things. Well I have Lik but hes not here, which doesn't do much for me. I want to feel him, I need that alive feeling I get from his touch of comfort you know? Let me eat something cause even now my body is feeling that weakness, shaking and shit and you know how much I hate to feel weak. I wonder if anyone in this house notices how really fucked up I am? Help me. PLEASE!

-me

EDIT: This note is one I had written to myself a while ago but I figured it would be unfair to hold out when everyone was getting so personal


*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 06:56 AM

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37. "I applaud you"
In response to Reply # 34


          

for being so brave! This was a very open, honest revealing look at you (and I do recognize that it only represented one side of you, and we are all multi fasseted) You know, I've always had a very sexy body, even when I was a very small child I had a shape and I started the think as I grew up that my body was all I was because that's where I seemed to get the most attention, be it from men, or family saying that girl is a brick house etc. Some might think that is a good thing, to have a beautiful body, but if that's all you feel you are noticed for you feel like nothing but a shell and that is painful... I was just identifying with your inner struggle, even though they may be for oposite reasons, it's the same struggle.

"it all boils down the this, I want love, security, and acceptance. I want to be genuinely loved, feel secure with myself, and feel accepted for everything that I am because right now I don't have any of those things. Well I have Lik but hes not here, which doesn't do much for me. I want to feel him, I need that alive feeling I get from his touch of comfort you know? Let me eat something cause even now my body is feeling that weakness, shaking and shit and you know how much I hate to feel weak"

---if you want love and acceptance and security and all of those things, you have to give it to yourself first and then when people see that strength and confidence shine from you, the wont be able to help but be drawn to you and want to be in your company and even to be like you. You have to see you flaws as unique to you and beautiful and know that there is someone out there who will love you for all of your so-called flaws and not inspite of them. Also, you should not desire the company of a man to help you feel better (I grew up with out a father so I did the same thing most of my lfe) but it's a false sense of comfort and as soon as he's gone you'll feel it again and you'll end up wanted and asking him to be more than he can for you, more than he should be for you. We need to be all of those things for ourselves and then let love in, healthy love. And girl, you need to start eating!!! you know when your blood sugar is low (from not eating) you feel sad and weak and depressed and if you just eat something you'll find that half the stuff that was stressing and hurting you does not exist. Much love, and again thanks for being so open and honest. It's good to see people that strong and that brave.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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mara
Member since Sep 21st 2002
2058 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 10:07 AM

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42. "Some after thoughts:"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

It's like I just told Robyn "It's not a matter of wanting to, it's a matter of what is" I do not WANT to feel this way but it IS how I feel. I acknowlege the fact that people are drawn to me, want to be in my company, and even want to be like me (I am a very infectious person) but FEELING it is another story. When there is no force behind words then they lose their value. So logically I know this but since there is no reinforcement they hold no weight to me. Also, EYE know logically that I am nice to look at (If you ask me I'm as cute a button LOL) but I'm not reassured of this for whatever reason or another. What I know and what I am shown are complete opposites (Contradictions).

>You have to see you flaws as unique to you and beautiful and
>know that there is someone out there who will love you for all
>of your so-called flaws and not inspite of them.

I am beginning to accept my flaws and as far as having someone who will love me for them and not inspite of them that is Lik (And vise versa) I'm growing up without a father now but I am the opposite. I actually run from emotion by nature (Many reasons for that) This is completely understood but his company does not HELP me feel better. I AM better with him. What I gain from him has nothing to do with the physical at all. I get the encouragement, reassurance and extra strength that I need to get up off my ass and get myself out of a situation I felt I had no control of. I understand the whole "we must first love ourself before we can have someone love us" type thing but to be honest everyone is not completely there just yet (Like myself). So does that mean in the mean time I must do without love? Who knows how long it will take for me to handle these things I am battling with. The essentials he provides that I have done without for so long are what's needed now and I think it would be foolish of me to do without because I don't have my shit together. I have made so much progress this year alone that I would have never accomplished by myself (I know because I have been trying to do so) He accepts me NOW, he accepts my incomplete self NOW, and I need that NOW. And no, I have never asked him to be more than who he is. If I want him to accept me for me then I have to do the same (It's only fair) So you better believe that as much as he does for me I have, will, and am doing the same for him. To do any less would not be satisfactory ESPECIALLY considering who it is I'm discussing (A whole other story) I guess no one other than he and I know just how healthy we are for each other but it's fine because you can't expect someone to understand something they aren't living.

>And girl, you need to start eating!!!

I eat. The question is how much. I have never been a big eater anyway (I'm more of a snacker) but the problem is when I get to a certain point I can go all day and food will not be on the mind at all. Then after doing that for so long it is now a habit in the sense that I can literally forget to eat. How it started and why is a long ass story and some details I'm not even sure about myself but the fact remain that it happens. When I wrote this I was at a very low point but my mindstate is a little bit different now. Now my eating habits are just weird. I still don't eat a lot cause I have never been a big eater but I'm not as distructive (Again, long story)

>Much love, and again thanks for being so open and honest.
>It's good to see people that strong and that brave.

Like I told someone before. "Sometimes no matter how much happiness surrounds you you still feel lonley and insecure so in an effort to do away with those unwelcomed feelings I'm gonna but it on shout. The truth shall set you free is not just scripture, but truth within itself. If somethings are allowed to live in the darkness they can hold you hostage, torture you, and damage your insides, but when brought to the light they can't survive. They can't hide in the corners of your soul and they can't live. Easier said then done cause we are made fear the damage of these demons more than we crave our own freedom but because I know it's something that must be done I'll just have to take it all in stride and bear it like a soilder because bondage and I were never friends to begin with" Thank you for the kind words but in all honesty I don't think it has anything to do with me being strong and brave, trying to be strong and brave is what gets my ass in trouble. I think it has to do with me being afraid for my life, specifically my peace of mind, and knowing that the only way to save myself is to be weak and cowardly for once in my life (If that makes any sense to you) Sorry for the long ass response but you made me think about a few things and that is always welcome.

*I'm hella hella sexy*

  

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KnowOne
Charter member
39940 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 07:54 AM

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39. "*speechless*"
In response to Reply # 34


  

          

This is painfully honest & yet still beautiful at the same time. The way this thread is going, but the times its done I think it needs an archive. (IMHO) Oh and as far as:

>what man of high caliber would want what I have to offer?
Any one with 1/2 a brain! You have a lot to offer.....more than you know........actually the same could be said for a lot of us around here.

Keep Flowin' Sis'......

_________________________________________
"Too weird to live.... too rare to die..."

IG: KnowOne215 | PS+ ID: KnowOne215

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 09:18 AM

Click to send private message to this authorClick to view this author's profileClick to add this author to your buddy list
40. "RE: *speechless*"
In response to Reply # 39


          

co-sign on the archive.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 09:35 AM

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41. "RE: *speechless*"
In response to Reply # 40


  

          

co-sign infinity on the archive.....

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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Nowachaoticthing
Member since Dec 24th 2002
2178 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 06:40 AM

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55. "RE: Mara"
In response to Reply # 34


  

          

damn. You really put it out there. I applaud your honesty. well-crafted, but painfully sad to read. Thank you for sharing this.

"To be a poet is a condition, not a profession."
- Robert Frost

http://inevitabletruth.blogspot.com/
http://www.lulu.com/content/187759
http://www.hdfest.com/Barry/allreviewsbarry.html
http://wishbonec.wordpress.com/

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 06:52 AM

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56. "yes"
In response to Reply # 55


          

"painfully sad to read. "

---exactly...



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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presyzion
Charter member
2112 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 06:28 AM

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35. "Dear Depression"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Dear Depression,

Come tonight, please let me be. I am hollow, & your fingernails have scraped my soul
leaving only the skin hanging limply on my bones as evidence
that a partial

man exists. You’ve shaped me into something that death rejected. Remember
at 19 you fed me sleeping pills? I tried to die but got slapped awake by mistake. You
made me witness

the pain on my mother’s face & wrote her thoughts that she failed in the lesson-giving she
gave to me, lovingly. I try to sleep to escape you. Once my eyes close I become
awakened in dream

that death is my reflection. I get shot & stabbed & chased by a tempting emotion,
explaining that if I get caught, I will be fed to six-feet of earth. So, I run. I run
into a depth

of black crevices. Where twin-headed monsters ache if not nailing fear across mortal’s
eyes. My eyes are black. I shake like a rumbling thunder-scream, & use
cactus quilts for warmth. You’ve made

me see that imperfections are the entities of life that my emotions are focused on.
Please, leave me to live. In return, when I have a family of my own, I won’t mention
the disasters that you’ve handed me.

felino

----------------------------------------
www.felinosoriano.com

My chapbook, "Exhibits Require Understanding Open Eyes" available from Trainwreck Press: http://www.ditchpoetry.com/trainwreckpress.htm

  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 06:59 AM

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38. "RE: Dear Depression"
In response to Reply # 35


  

          

<< I try to sleep to escape you. >>

i know that feeling, you got the piture complete ...
someday someday .. the sun will come out tomorrow..

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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slicklyric
Member since Feb 13th 2003
413 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 04:49 AM

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54. "RE: Dear Depression"
In response to Reply # 35


          

oh my, say have we met? ur speaking my life, the events/thoughts/feelings...i swear i just read what (if i had ur talent) would have written.

anyway, just wanted to say keep ya head up.

"when a man aims at nothing, he seldom misses the target"

"absence of occupation, is not rest"

"write it down. the worst ink survives the best memory"

  

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Decstar
Member since Jan 22nd 2003
2278 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 03:51 PM

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52. "Dear Balik"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

(this is jus something to start on. get it out for a second.)

This is Decarrus. yea, you took over a while ago. i jus sat back and hid. u knew tha trouble i was in. i just wanted to say, man, thank you and i'm proud of you, dog. i'm glad you found ya wifey, ya pen, and made a difference because i dont think i could've. you are truly amazing. you deserve a shot, man. i know it's mad rough on you now, b. i see alotta people hating on you and doubtin you and ya moms aint much of help, but you still in there, man. you gonna make it. you got somebody precious behind you. shit, after all you done, i dont know how you got J. she's a keeper. i can really tell you love her. i'm happy for you. look at what tha streets made us. it made me a thug and made you a real nigga. not a crazy dude or nothing but an intelligent, smart, talented real man. you been through alot and i'm glad you learned from your mistakes. shit, me, selling drugs, drinking, smoking, lyin, only slowed you down. could've had you a scholarship. know you use to leave tha court with ankles. football, we was taking heads off. but i'm glad u didnt end up like ya brothers. they were tha same, but u came out different. guess you just grew out of it. but you picked up something better. love how u put yaself on tha paper. u all in poetry now, u dont even rip cats anymore. guess u grew outta that too. u just continue to grow, dont you. you became a man before your time. shit, man, you know i'm not good at words. you tha man on that. just keep ya head up. show tha world what LD been holdin onto.

"There is nothing more poetic, but depressing than a male writer" -yours truly

  

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Decstar
Member since Jan 22nd 2003
2278 posts
Thu Jul-31-03 04:08 PM

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53. "Dear heart"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Yea, this is ya main man, Balik. i know it's packed in there. i reserved the capacity like i wanted, at three. you know tha deal. you can love everybody, but not everybody can fit in ya heart. you aint that big, fella. ok, ok, my bad, but you know what i meant. of course G ma in there. that's the number one lady in my life. nobody topping her. moms in there, even though, well you know tha shit that has being goin down. and tish is in there. god, where did i go wrong there. that is a beautiful, sexy, funny lady. i had her when everybody else couldnt. i was too dumb at tha time. too young and sprung. couldnt approach wit tha game as usual. she mesmerized me. she tha only shorty to have me sprung. i dont even know if i should pursue anymore. she can only date on her pop's approval. we both know how that's gonna go down. ouch, need anotha band-aid. she probably dont even have the same feelings anymore. it's been a while since we actually talked. so many times, too many looks. but hey, i aint gonna get sobby on you. i think somebody else should go in there. i know i'm bendin my own rules, but she's worth tha bend and tha break. somebody that's just as real, just as smart, just as wonderful as i am. i'm not looking for the identical of me, but i aint looking for the opposite either. J is amazing. convo is one thing but how we relate and connect, yo, shorty got me. i aint even gonna front, she is the wife-type, but she wifey for right now. the pen is cool wit that cuz she already wrote some poems for her. i was just wondering if you was cool. i just wanna make J happy. she can take that however she wants. i know what she wants and i know what she needs and if it makes her happy, and the time is right, i'm down to make her happy. and what would really make me happy is for you to accept her. we ARE looking for the right love and let's jus say, i got more than a nudge about Johna. i think we can finally be peaceful with her. so what do you say?

"There is nothing more poetic, but depressing than a male writer" -yours truly

  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 07:44 AM

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58. "heart of gold steel platium silver plastic wood charcoa"
In response to Reply # 53


  

          

makes a girl wanna melt.

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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My Pretty Eyez
Member since Dec 31st 2002
138 posts
Fri Aug-01-03 10:39 PM

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60. "..she used too..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Erin,

Remember when mom used to talk about how beautiful you were? I sure do. It's been awhile, I know. I miss it too. I don't know why she stopped either, but I'm sure it has something to do with those size 20 jeans hangin in the closet. "when Erin was in high school, she was so fit and much thinner.." (sound familiar?) Now its... "... you can't blame having kids Erin, he is 7 now. But... you'll lose the weight when you are ready." (yeah thats about how it goes) You beat yourself up constantly over your appearance. So much so that you have been ignoring me. I know I'm only a soul and shit, but dam girl... gimme some love every now and again. I don't have to tell you what happens when I get ignored.

Is it not enough that you already have a complex about every good thing in your life? I can give you one about the bad things too. What do you do then? Is there anything you are confident about? You even doubt your own intelligence.... even though on a daily basis, you show everyone what your made of.

Do you notice that people love you? Do you notice that you are admired and respected and some people wish they were more like you.... (including your own lover?) And don't get me started there.... you can't save him... so give up and be who you are and it will be easier to accept who he is. Just Love him, its that easy.

Moving on... I know you miss your baby brother, and that so far is your stumbling block. He was the only one who never critisized you. You were his example, his Big Sister. There was no one better than you... (cept Mom, but that's a given) Cherish his memory, you are healing that part of you at least.

I just wanted to tell you... You are beautiful, smart, honest, caring, funny, and beautiful. I know you don't think so, but the sooner you see it, the quicker the rest will fall into place. I love you, now you need to love you. And God Dammit...! Talk to me more, I miss our little "heart to heart's"

-Always here... no matter what,
Your Soul.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
"Loving someone deeply gives you courage. Being loved deeply gives you strength."


"You can't kick off in a smurfs ass... you ain't tough..." -Nowachaoticthing (in response to one of my many idle threats to beat his ass)

  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Mon Aug-04-03 04:35 AM

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62. "awe...."
In response to Reply # 60


  

          

...girl you are beautiful... don't get down on ya self... let your true nature out and i'm sure you will be surprised, and once you show your confindence no one will be able to argue! have faith in yourself!

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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robynwildchild
Member since May 06th 2003
4550 posts
Mon Aug-04-03 04:44 AM

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63. "mystic"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

dear shithead,

you know i'm kiddin. i love ya. he called you, why you thinking past that. it is what it is. stop thinking it's gone before it begins. who knows what the hell tomorrow will bring to your door. you know you got luck on your side somehow... all those thoughts that you're thinking.. materializing, how the fuck does that happen. you always manage to get what you need at the moment to keep ya goin. don't let those thoughts that create theses things and situations get the best of you. stay on top. you got some kinda magic goin on.. (either that or you've been listening to too much of your sister's new age shit) make sure your positivly focussing on the future and remember what you learned in the past. shit can't get ANY worse... believe that. it's all good from here.. no matter what happens with that stupid boy. so chill, do ya shit and keep on.

love,
your mystic self

~~~~~~~~ luv R.
https://www.facebook.com/robyn.wildchild12
psycho.
"Institutions encourage us to consider the opinions they sell as "facts" and that we "believe" rather than question the morality they pitch."
cities need fewer shopping malls and more skat

  

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ToeJam
Charter member
2102 posts
Mon Aug-04-03 05:01 AM

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64. "My dear love angel ToeJam..."
In response to Reply # 0


          

Dear ToeJam,

You know how much I care about you and how strong our bond is, and know that I wish no harm on you, but you have a problem. You've got to stop smoking all these wack emcees before there's nobody left to battle. I know about your pride and all, but it's really not healthy to eat these pussy emcees raw. They most likely carry various diseases, such a crabs and foot-in-mouth disease. Please think about your future, and what not stopping could do to your life. Thousands apon thousands of disgruntled wack rappers will be wanting to jump you with their equally wack crews, and then you will have to beat all their asses simultaneaously while eating a sandwich which might be high in cholestorol, and you'll just have to beat more and more asses ad nauseum until your whole waking like is nothing but sandwiches and beat downs. Thank you for taking this under consideration.

Love, ToeJam

p.s.This is an attempt to collect a debt. Any information recieved may be used for that purpose in the court of law.

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Wed Aug-06-03 11:25 AM

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65. "up"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I'll be posting a new one soon



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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delsbrothergeorge
Charter member
4413 posts
Wed Aug-06-03 12:58 PM

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66. "good"
In response to Reply # 65


          

'cause your "notes" have been the illest reads on here.

---i'm here---

"...do what scares you..." -- l. varela

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Thu Aug-07-03 09:42 AM

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68. "RE: good"
In response to Reply # 66


          

awwwwww (smile) kisses DBG on the cheek *wink*. When are you gonna post one????? You can't just look, you gotta participate! And you know you only like mine because they have sexual connotation *lol*. I'm sure you were being sarcastic. Much love fam.



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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Imagination_7
Member since Jun 10th 2003
1580 posts
Thu Aug-07-03 09:52 AM

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69. "Get it together."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I don’t know if I ever talked to you before but I figured “what the hell.” Seems like it’s an okay thing to do. Remember when we went to the psychic and she said you share everything with others and hide everything from yourself? Do you think it’s true? I am beginning to think so. I’m mad at you. You fuck up all the time. And it’s just some old irresponsible type shit. Don’t finish what you start. Mostly because I know you are so scatterbrained. Paint, cook, cry, write, hold baby, work, laugh, love, ooh-look at those shoes, listen to that! Never taking time to really put an order to things. It’s one big mess if you ask me girl. Trying to do too much. Damn near bipolar. Trying to save the world one minute and hiding under the covers crying the next. Get it together honey! Let yourself be. I hate you but I love you. So indecisive but beauty springs forth at the strangest time and I love you all over again. Les, please stop fussing about your body. It is what it is. Forget the stretch marks, battle scars, and inadequacies by Western culture’s standards. What DO you like? Love your eyes. They still sparkle when they should have went dull a long time ago. Celebrate the curves you try to hide. Aint nothing wrong with the rear end God gave us! Don’t hide it! What I’m trying to say is, darling, try not to be so hard on yourself. Put no one else’s dreams above your own! Are they not worthy of seeing the light of day? Share. Or try to. Maybe you will open doors you never imagined. Whatever you decide to do, make it because it is what YOU want to do. Stop trying to change into whatever HE wants you to be. Fill in the blank for the HE… daddy, him, other, sons. In that “being” I think you will find the peace you’ve been looking for. Don’t go crazy trying to analyze why he didn’t love you! He didn’t. That’s all that matters. I know he seemed like your last hope at falling into the head-over-heels-16-again-honest-type-love but there has got to be more. I know you wanted to laugh, kiss, hug,share, have conversations about how to free black folk with him but it’s not going to happen! Yes, he seemed like a revolutionary but make a revolution out of finding yourself. Can’t look for validation in him, your ex-husband, lost first love, or dysfunctional daddy. Find some value in YOU first and then maybe someone better will come along and acknowledge it. And if they don’t… there YOU are. Amazing, radiant, intellectual, spiritual, god/blessed, and phenomenal. Needing no one else.
I love you girl!
Les

*I have read a lot of other peoples posts but never did my own. I feel better getting some of this out.*

****************************************************************7

"Everybody wants the hero. Who just wants the man? Who fights with his devils and does the best he can. Everybody wants a player. I just want a friend..." Jill Scott

"The universe will reward you for taking risks on its behalf" Unknown


Lesley

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Tue Aug-12-03 03:09 AM

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73. "RE: Get it together."
In response to Reply # 69


          

Thank you for have the courage to be so open. It's nice to look into someone rather than at them. This was good to read and I hope getting it out does help insight some change in how you feel and think. I liked this line

"And if they don’t… there YOU are. Amazing, radiant, intellectual, spiritual, god/blessed, and phenomenal. Needing no one else."

---Much Love.




______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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Imagination_7
Member since Jun 10th 2003
1580 posts
Tue Aug-12-03 04:04 AM

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74. "RE: Get it together."
In response to Reply # 73


  

          

Thank you. It really has helped me to just let some of these feelings out into the universe. I feel like it is a start to be being more honest and accepting of who I am. I appreciate you taking the time to read and post. Really. Blessings...

****************************************************************7

"Everybody wants the hero. Who just wants the man? Who fights with his devils and does the best he can. Everybody wants a player. I just want a friend..." Jill Scott

"The universe will reward you for taking risks on its behalf" Unknown


Lesley

  

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My Pretty Eyez
Member since Dec 31st 2002
138 posts
Sun Aug-17-03 07:55 AM

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77. "RE: Get it together."
In response to Reply # 74


  

          

I feel like I just read about myself. This was amazing and I enjoyed reading it. I feel this entire piece. I hope it brings you a beginning of healing. I know my writing has lately.
Peace girl... Peace.

-Erin

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
"Loving someone deeply gives you courage. Being loved deeply gives you strength."


"You can't kick off in a smurfs ass... you ain't tough..." -Nowachaoticthing (in response to one of my many idle threats to beat his ass)

  

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Diffident Alchemist
Member since Jul 27th 2003
185 posts
Thu Aug-07-03 02:23 PM

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71. "to: my heart"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          


You have been captured by the presence of woman and child, never to loosen their grasp on you. In your most selfish of all times you were found and protected . Although you continue to be selfish at times, you now know where you belong and you strive to solidify your position in that place. Whether you stumble with every step or you tread with a steadfast gait you are loved just the same. You needed that for so long and lost yourself in the search. Now found and in the company of the two most important souls that will ever enter you, you see you have come a long way and have even more to look forward to. Your search is over for you were found first. Blessed you are and grateful for your life I know you are and I know because I feel you with every breath….

______________________________
{Diffident:Reserved in manner}

{Alchemy:A medieval chemical philosophy having as its asserted aims the transmutation of base metals into gold.}

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Fri Aug-08-03 02:40 AM

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72. "sonrisa"
In response to Reply # 71


          

gracias mi esposo, mi cielo. *beso*



______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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PhotoSynthesis
Charter member
16101 posts
Sun Aug-17-03 03:08 AM

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75. "B~4 This Falls Off Into 7th Heaven --"
In response to Reply # 0


          

Let's see if we can get it archived! -- ;^)


I'll INBOX the Ant! -- *YeP~YeP*

A guitar string vibrating, a measure of my soul, a breech in the silence --
I've always felt like words come through me & I write them down... they have no master --- gsquared ♥

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/2/photosynthesis_music.htm

  

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Mystic_Elixir
Charter member
1808 posts
Sun Aug-17-03 06:02 AM

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76. "good idea"
In response to Reply # 75


          





______________________________
http://www.4luvofpoetry.com
http://www.carolsdaughter.com
http://www.ubiqueros.com
http://www.fillifoundation.com
http://www.saulwilliams.com
http://www.astrology.com
_________Promotions_________
Need some amazing eye candy? Need to get your work noticed, or just want one for your own personal pleasure? THEE best website designs EVER! Come in and take a look, you wont be sorry http://www.ubiqueros.com/freelancer

_______closing remarks______

"If it is the dirty element that gives pleasure to the act of lust, then the dirtier it is, the more pleasurable it is bound to be."
--Marquis De Sade

"It has, moreover, been proven that horror, nastiness, and the frightful are what give pleasure when one fornicates. Beauty is a simple thing; ugliness is the exceptional thing. And firey imaginations, no doubt, always prefer the extraordinary thing to the simple thing."
--Marquis De Sade



"Show me an artist who is not insane, and I will show you a fraud"---Me

"Love is anterior to life
posterior to death
Initial of creation, and
the exponent of breath"--Emily Dickenson

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"--Kahlil Gibran(...and *Z* seems to have learned this the hard way, which it seems is the only way to learn...)

"I am ashamed
to call this love human
and afraid of God
to call it divine"--Rumi (real name Jalal ad-Din Mohammed Balkhi)

"May I be, forward? Before word, is, intent"--Saul Williams

Mystic: One who experiences mystical union, or direct communion with God or Ulitmate reality.

Elixir: A substance held capable of prolonging life indefinitely (also panacea) a sweetened, alcoholic, medicinal solution... I am


  

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daisysuicidesparkler
Member since Aug 17th 2003
662 posts
Sun Aug-17-03 08:44 AM

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78. "Dear Fear,"
In response to Reply # 0
Sun Aug-17-03 08:48 AM

  

          

i can't emphasize enough how unneeded your overwhelming presence is here. Your invasion of me has died off a bit in the past few moons, and it is my intention to keep you at a healthy distance. i know quite well you will appear from time to time. understand that you will not succeed in paralyzing my mind.
new chapters have just begun and my movement will remain strong towards positive progression. i will continue to live and learn, stumble and fall, recovering balance again. i'll be aiming for the unaccomplished, by your presence i'll remain undaunted. for everyday births new revelations, manifestations of my worth reign evident thru fulfilling daily dedications.
i will continue to sing, smile, laugh, cry, die and create for life's sake on a grand scale type of elevation. your challenge i will turn into my end result of elation. i will work thru you and turn your energy into my motivation. together we can co-exist but know this, i will resist your conquering fits to chain me into a bondage of stagnation.

pCe.

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"I do not believe that I am now dreaming, but I cannot prove that I am not."
-- Bertrand Russell

  

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