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Subject: "The Gangsta Gospels: MC Jesus Chronicles 2001" This topic is locked.
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poetx
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58833 posts
Mon Jan-29-01 03:38 PM

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"The Gangsta Gospels: MC Jesus Chronicles 2001"


  

          

I was reading where Ray Lewis was buggin out the week before the superbowl and comparing himself to Jesus, and I was thinking, "damn, i missed the scripture where Jesus spoke on hitting strip clubs..."

That prompted me to do some research, and what i found out was surprising. there are several scrolls that were found on the border between Sudan and Egypt, written in Demotic script, detailing the life of Christ. together with the Gnostic Gospels, these scrolls help to fill in the gaps of christianity. these scrolls are biblically significant, since they contain what he was doing in the 'missing' years (between 13 and 33), for which the currently accepted New Testament contains no account. the translation is still in progress, but i'll post some stuff as i come across it.

So far, my favorite is the Book Of Rhymes. There's considerable debate about the authorship of this one, but the consensus to date is that it was authored by a disciple named Ray-Ray. some of the other books include the Book Of Gangsta, Ray-Ray, Earl, Jerome I and II, the Book of Gear, Tyrone and the Book of Cheryl.

the following is an excerpt from the Book Of Rhymes, which gives a fair account of the young Jesus' skills.

pass the frankin-sess, son/ we stay lit like fat Cairo spliffs/
cipher up until we simple/ tag the temple wif heiroglyphs/
spell my name, Y-E-S*... aww eff it, y'all know the rest/
leave y'all like "God, Daaaammn..."/ wif the mic that i blessed/

Book Of Rhymes, Chapter 15 verse 10. (The Parable Of Emceeing)

he also goes off in Chapter 24 verse 3 (Flowing Like Robes)

natty dread, head to feet, check this burnt brass complexion/
pre-resurrection, politic with mud brick chicks that strictly section -/
8, i elevate -- my nameplate's on heaven's gate/
whip ras kass' ass in dice i'm nice, rolled 144,000 seven's straight...
whut?"

he rushed his syllables in the last line of the last joint, but his breath control is out of this world.


*Footnotes: i can't read Demotic, but it had no vowels like its lingustic predecessor, Kemetic. the scholar who performed the transcription here assumed that the letters were too have spelled Jesus' name, and inserted the Hebrew spelling, Yeshua -- other than those types of things i'm assured that they have tried to be as faithful to the original text as possible.

peace & blessings,

x.


January is Kool Keith quote month, for lack of anything else:

"I never hearda you stupid, what's your name man??"

"Rappers don't know, I'm out the hospital/
cold buggin' and illin' like Dr. Doolittle"

"I'll chew your ass like monkeys on Wild Kingdom"

"you call yourself GOD, can you make it rain?/
can you tell me now what I'm thinkin' in my brain?"

"under your arms, you're kickin power and musty"

"word to mom, I'm in my own world.../
galaxy raaaaaays... powerful"

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
The Book Of Gangsta
Jan 29th 2001
1
The Book Of Gangsta -- On Ice
Jan 30th 2001
8
      crying --->
Jan 31st 2001
19
      RE: crying --->
Feb 12th 2001
69
      *dead*
Mar 10th 2005
78
And so it begins
Jan 29th 2001
2
glad you have been uplifted
Jan 30th 2001
5
      That was beautiful! n/m
Feb 06th 2001
54
you're a prolific writer. n/m
Jan 29th 2001
3
no, i'm a time-wastin' mickeyfickey. :-) n/m
Jan 29th 2001
4
re:
ive_been_framed
Jan 30th 2001
6
@@@ out of @@@@@ nm
Jan 30th 2001
7
3/5? forgive him, for he know not what he do... n/m
Jan 30th 2001
9
binlahab is a HATEUR!!!!!
Feb 01st 2001
28
but ur okayhighschool...
Feb 04th 2001
43
      .
Oct 22nd 2001
72
Going to hell with gasoline activator
Jan 30th 2001
10
"the road to hell...
Feb 02nd 2001
42
RE: You may go to hell for this
Jan 30th 2001
11
RE: You may go to hell for this
Feb 07th 2001
62
Great Work
Jan 30th 2001
12
U READ...
Jan 30th 2001
13
i just posted to say...
Jan 30th 2001
14
GOD loves you... and Stevie Wonder
Feb 01st 2001
26
MC Jesus news swipe (Jeflee style...)
Jan 30th 2001
15
still cracking up
Feb 01st 2001
29
The Book Of Gear
Jan 30th 2001
16
New Okay Artist? n/m
Jan 31st 2001
17
Good Idea!, i'ma ask ShaunGee n/m
Jan 31st 2001
18
JC will NOT be the next OKArtist :-(
Feb 06th 2001
57
      y'all believe that??
Feb 06th 2001
58
fjbj? read me:
Feb 01st 2001
30
      alas, it was not sweatshop free.
Feb 01st 2001
33
The Book Of Cheryl
Jan 31st 2001
20
this is wild!!!!
Saleem
Jan 31st 2001
21
This is an instant archive right here
Jan 31st 2001
22
this is funny
alter ego
Jan 31st 2001
23
More JC News
Feb 01st 2001
24
RE: More JC News
ive_been_framed
Feb 05th 2001
51
How the Fuck
Feb 01st 2001
25
ARCHIVE!!!!!!!!!!!1
Feb 01st 2001
27
tru but
Feb 01st 2001
31
      and the Truth...
Feb 01st 2001
35
           RE: and the Truth...
Feb 01st 2001
36
                its scurry, tho'...
Feb 01st 2001
37
The Book Of Earl
Feb 01st 2001
32
You are a heathen!
Feb 06th 2001
55
sick shit...lmao n/m
Feb 09th 2001
67
Instant Classic...
Feb 01st 2001
34
Blow up Candy1's inbox
Feb 01st 2001
38
Jesus in the lab with Wu-Tang!!
Feb 02nd 2001
39
itll be
Feb 04th 2001
44
^
Feb 02nd 2001
40
i said ^!!!!!!
Feb 02nd 2001
41
JESUS CHRIST!!!
Feb 04th 2001
45
bite-er
Feb 04th 2001
46
we interrupt the MC Jesus chronicles
Feb 04th 2001
47
Jesus speaks on Hate
Feb 04th 2001
48
this is the funniest shit ive ever read here
Feb 05th 2001
49
oh my damn!
Feb 06th 2001
56
      words to live by n/m
Feb 06th 2001
59
      RE: oh my damn!
Oct 20th 2001
71
rise. n/m
Feb 05th 2001
50
PLEASE ARCHIVE ME!!!
Feb 05th 2001
52
can i get a sermon from the book of jerome?
Feb 06th 2001
53
      RE: can i get a sermon from the book of jerome?
Feb 06th 2001
61
           Ask, and thee SHALL receive!
Feb 08th 2001
63
                oops, i meant "Ye". i need (MC)Jesus n/m
Feb 08th 2001
64
                This is the best one
Feb 08th 2001
65
                RE: Ask, and thee SHALL receive!
Feb 08th 2001
66
*jaw drop* n/m
Feb 06th 2001
60
"Honor the Sabbath...
Feb 09th 2001
68
Gangstah Jesus at dah Temple
Sep 06th 2001
70
A year later
javann
Jan 12th 2002
73
2nd coming?????
Mar 09th 2005
74
I was just thinking....
Mar 09th 2005
75
      shit. what'd i go and do that for. n/m
Mar 09th 2005
76
           hahahaha. n/m
Mar 09th 2005
77

poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Mon Jan-29-01 03:46 PM

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1. "The Book Of Gangsta"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

this scroll was written by a man named Jerome who went to junior high school with Jesus, and apparently was one of his first crew of 'disciples'. Jerome I and II take us through JC's teen years and early adulthood, and show that the son of man went through some changes as he was growing up.


The Chapter 3 of 2nd Jerome deals mainly with clubbin. the following verse appears to be the one that Ray Lewis was citing...

Jerome II Chapter 3 verses 33-38

33. And know ye this, when thou runneth up in the strippeth club, tippeth well, for surely the rumpeth shakers toil muchly for thy delight.

34. Should ish go down, it is best for thee to depart with haste, lest thee become caught up in the bull ish.

35. If there be one among ye who create iniquity, I say, leave them to the hells of their devising, lest they messeth up thy game as well. And should one among thy crew violate, ask thyself, would these brethren have thy back in similar circumstance? If the answer is nay, get thee away.

36. If the answer be yea, then smite mightily, for God IS with thee. The very hosts of heaven shall aid thee, and dispense eye jammies to the unrighteous.

37. And know ye also, it is good to squash beef, however, it is divine to prevent beef.

38. Heed though, that should five-o come, thou must mention not the name of the Son of God, for I know ye NOT. I already haveth two strikes and will not do a bid for thee until my father sees fit. It is thus between thee and caesar*. One.

*the original script mentioned someone named "Jake" (?), but the scholars concluded it must have been Jacobus Caesar, a despotic roman politician who ruled during that era.

peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 05:43 AM

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8. "The Book Of Gangsta -- On Ice"
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

Gangsta, chapter 2, verse 1-3

1. Ice not thy grille, thy wrist, thy neck, nor the rims of they chariot, lest thee arouse covetousness in men.

2. And surely, he who iceth muchly, shall get GOT.

3. And Ice not thy neighbor's wife, nor thy neighbor's wife's ass, lest thee invoke the wrath of thy neighbor.

4. Know ye that the ice of this world shall surely melt away, but that the ice in my father's crib is abundant. In heaven, the very streets are paved with platinum, and every smile haveth the bling bling.

5. Greater is the ice above than any that mortal men rocketh.



peace & blessings,

x.








peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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KayDee
Charter member
25731 posts
Wed Jan-31-01 09:05 AM

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19. "crying --->"
In response to Reply # 8


  

          


  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Mon Feb-12-01 07:12 AM

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69. "RE: crying --->"
In response to Reply # 19


  

          

"Shed no tears for me, as I shall rise from the 5th page on the third day" Cheryl, Chapter 23, verse 10.


peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Silky Johnson PhD
Member since Mar 07th 2005
120 posts
Thu Mar-10-05 06:03 AM

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78. "*dead*"
In response to Reply # 8


  

          

'That's some briliant shiznit' (c) Guru

=========================
I'm a shoo-in for the Player hater
of the year.

I wanna thank God for giving
everyone so much and me so
little.

I hope all the bad things in life
happen to yooo and nobody else
but yooo.

hatehatehatehatehate

  

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ShinobiShaw
Charter member
48548 posts
Mon Jan-29-01 05:04 PM

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2. "And so it begins"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

The boards, could the intelligence be coming back. Dont let this post die, this shit was squirt water out your nose funny.

5 D.V.S
Straight smacking bitches in the 2001!

http://members.blackplanet.com/ShinobiShaw/

"Lost among the miracles, I stand alone
And i've grown into a being that's sitting on top of throne
I've known
For many years that I would turn to rust
I find a reason for another breath
Before my return to dust"
Ikon

http://soundcloud.com/djshinobishaw
http://www.rareformnyc.com
http://twitter.com/DJShinobiShaw
https://twitter.com/RareFormNYC
PSN: ShinobiShaw

"Arm Leg Leg Arm How you doin?" (c)T510

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 05:05 AM

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5. "glad you have been uplifted"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

i know there are a lot of folks on the boards searching for spiritual truths, and i'm just tryin' to help them in their journey.

It reminds me of a passage from the book of Earl (chapter 30, verse 10).

10. And the lord spake unto them, saying, Thou art not in this world to live up to mine expectations, neither then, am I beholden to thine. I SHALL doeth mine thang, and thou doeth thine, and if by chance we meet, it is beautiful.




peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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grammarian
Charter member
1354 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 12:13 AM

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54. "That was beautiful! n/m"
In response to Reply # 5


          

"I walk in the bedroom, and she's down there speaking Japanese, 'Hey, Doe, Rikki De Doe.' I didn't want to hear that, we had bills to pay."--Ike Turner

"I don't care if you don't want me, I'm yours right now."--Nina Simone

"he wears high-draped pants, striped all in yellow/ but when he starts in to love me, he is so fine and mellow"--Billie Holliday

"and I want to remember you there/ forever wrapped in a soggy towel/ hovering over your razors/ and that beautiful bowl."--me

Q:Are you a fool, fool?
A: Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes!
--My dad cracking a joke.
Love you, Pa.

  

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Gloworm
Charter member
6077 posts
Mon Jan-29-01 05:23 PM

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3. "you're a prolific writer. n/m"
In response to Reply # 0


          

_____________
because it's always Fiona Quote Month....
"here's another speech you wish i'd swallow
another cue for you to hold your ears
another train of thought to hard to follow" - fiona apple
-----
flashback to a simpler time....
"it's Log, it's Log, it's big, it's bad, it's wood!
it's Log, it's Log, it's better than bad, it's good!

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Mon Jan-29-01 06:15 PM

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4. "no, i'm a time-wastin' mickeyfickey. :-) n/m"
In response to Reply # 3


  

          

peace & blessings,

x.


"word to mom, I'm in my own world.../
galaxy raaaaaays... powerful"

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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ive_been_framed

Tue Jan-30-01 05:14 AM

  
6. "re:"
In response to Reply # 0


          

....i have seed the light!!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------------------------
visit my site! http://www.edeckdirect.com/~chuckm
-----------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------------------------

"The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
1. When they're ready
2. When you're not " --One of Murphy's Laws of War
"The amount of love someone feels for you is inversely proportional to how much you love them. " --One of Murphy's Laws of Love
"All the good ones are taken. Corollary: If he/she isn't taken, there's a reason why" --Murphy's Laws of Love, #1

  

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Binlahab
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182932 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 05:18 AM

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7. "@@@ out of @@@@@ nm"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Yo, je dont sait de vous. Mais je suis personnellement malade et
fatigue du moyen ce pays est couru et comment son est effecting
nous. Je pense du monde que mes gosses auront hérité de la basé
de mon propre chef apathie de générations, et je reçois nauseous.
Je veux à fait quelque chose, affecter le VRAI changement. Est-ce
que vous vous sentez pareil? Me parvenir à sur mon inbox.

on sabbatical.

does it really matter?

wonder what bin's doing?
http://i.imgur.com/phECCMp.jpg

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 08:33 AM

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9. "3/5? forgive him, for he know not what he do... n/m"
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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fire
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111370 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:13 PM

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28. "binlahab is a HATEUR!!!!!"
In response to Reply # 7


          

motherfucker please. 3 out of 5 are u madd>?

________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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morpheme
Charter member
94867 posts
Sun Feb-04-01 03:28 PM

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43. "but ur okayhighschool..."
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

was @@@@@ out of @@@@@???

me thinks the nigger doth protests too much © escapespeare




asighn4jane just ain't VALID n e more

"be honest now...are u cummin w/the customers???" © 'Girl 6'

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

  

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Carnie
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973 posts
Mon Oct-22-01 08:40 AM

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72. "."
In response to Reply # 43


          

.

  

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Blackmagicallydelicious
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9576 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 08:39 AM

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10. "Going to hell with gasoline activator"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Naw, that shit is mad hilarious.









*********************************************************
"Speak, so that you may speak."--Zora Neale Hurston

http://members.BlackPlanet.com/MindSexiest
...to see me in all my Blackmagicallydeliciousness

http://www.javanoire.com
...where I read, sell jewelry, etc. in the TC

be on the lookout for my jewelry on eBay February/March 2001...support black owned business

"Slaves have options. There's escape, revolt, or death. But for cowards, there's only consequences..."--from Passing Strange

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Fri Feb-02-01 05:06 PM

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42. ""the road to hell..."
In response to Reply # 10


  

          

is paved with good postings" Ray-Ray, Chapter 5, verse 3.


peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Angel
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204 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 08:44 AM

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11. "RE: You may go to hell for this"
In response to Reply # 0


          


Not that i would want oyu to go to hell. Im ashamed to admit that I did snicker at this touch of blasphemy.


-------------------------------------------
You may have walked away,
but we're still as close as when I gazed,
deep in your gentle eyes

earthangel075@yahoo.com

  

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fire
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111370 posts
Wed Feb-07-01 10:35 AM

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62. "RE: You may go to hell for this"
In response to Reply # 11


          


________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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TastyDog
Charter member
1377 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 09:11 AM

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12. "Great Work"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I can't wait until more scrolls are uncovered
---------------------------------------------------------------
"MOOSEHEAD: A great beer and a new experience for a moose"

******
The Pickled Beats Prhaject-Nothign's Perfect

feat OKPs Esco, Flud, AlSharp, ZEB, DJ Roger Riddle, and DN3

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/6/pickledbeatspboh4.htm

***
Check out a mix from me (Roger Riddle)
http://www.ubiqueros.com/afterh

  

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emil
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10566 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 09:14 AM

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13. "U READ..."
In response to Reply # 0


          

GNOSIS MAGAZINE? GOOD SHIT.


i mean...i'm sayin tho.

http://www.geocities.com/originalbluepeanut/

  

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serena_love
Charter member
3404 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 09:17 AM

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14. "i just posted to say..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I love you...i just posted to say how much i care...i just posted to say i LOOOOOVE YOU! and i mean it from the bottom of my heart.

funny shit...as usual.

keep on keep keepin on-MC Lyte in her later days

Peace,
Serena

I just wanna clear up some misconceptions about me.
1. I'm not stupid (you are for thinking i am..and then ignoring the intelligent things i say)
2. I'm not boob obsessed (your obsessed with mine actually)
3. My love is real and all who ask for it recieve (don't be pissed cause you are unable to love unconditionally)

and that is all.

and rem....ah fuck it just aim me: serenalovesu

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:06 PM

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26. "GOD loves you... and Stevie Wonder"
In response to Reply # 14


  

          

JC actually wrote part of Songs In The Key Of Life. i think somewhere in the liner notes you'll see where Stevie shouted him out.

In my research, i also found out that Jesus used to have a doo-wop group "Christ and the Miracles". then he had some beef with his management and bounced. he was replaced by Smokey Robinson and the rest is history.

peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 10:09 AM

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15. "MC Jesus news swipe (Jeflee style...)"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Christ Still Nice (1/26/01, 7 a.m. ET) - Even while the discovery of the lost scrolls is reviving interest in his past, MC J.C. is frantically working on his present, and future. We caught up with the lord while he was taking a break from recording his next release (we can't tell you the studio, he's insisting on secrecy as a precondition for our exclusive access).

NYT: so what you been doing, god?

JC (looks annoyed): that's God, dawg, i'm a CAPITAL G...

NYT: my bad, my bad...

JC: i've just been doing my thing, dealing with a lot of nonbelievers, a lot of adversity, yunno? i'm just *real* vexed at how last year went down tho'. damn.

NYT: how so?

JC: what is you stupid? that was sposed to be MY YEAR? we had an ad campaign set up over two millenia, you know how much effort that takes? and then for the album to not drop??? *grrrr*

NYT: so what happened?

JC: it was the label, man. well, i'm not without fault myself. no , waittaminit, yes i am. they messed up. basically, that's what went down. i tried to come out on an indie label, break up the monopoly of BMG (Baptist Music Group) and ViaCom (Vatican Information and Artistic Communications).

NYT: wasn't your new label a dot com?

JC: yeah. bad timin'. if i came out in '99, prolly would have blown up the spot, nahmean? they was promisin' ownership of my publishing, plus Rza-type points, Master P type clout and i couldn't pass on that. you know VIACom and BMG still own the rights to almost all of the work i did in my New Testament period?

NYT: you not gettin paid for none of that son, they be playin it all on the radio, and on sundays, lawd, they be passin the hat--

JC: i'm sayin! I went and just sat in on a church the other week and this pastor bit my entire Sermon On The Mount??? i'm like, i shouldn't have let Judas talk me into selling my masters... but what can you do, yunno?

JC: i feel like Lord Finesse, or Large Professor or sumpthin'. heads been waitin' for my album to drop so long. now the joint i was gonna release last year is all tied up in litigation* so I'm a just start from scratch. plus, the beats are kinda stale now, I had joints by Swizz, Timbaland, and Trackmasterz, but i think hip hop is shifting a little. Manny Fresh sent me some stuff and i'm kinda feelin that... also, there's this cat named Label Guy who's gonna help me with the PR stuff so i can just focus on what i do, yunno, saving the world. i'm out to save the world

Jesus abruptly ended the interview when Primo walked into the studio (time is money). *the title of last year's album was supposed to be The Second Coming, but that's tied up in court proceedings. Currently, LG let me know that they were considering Thief In The Night or Still Healmatic for the new album, slated for fall 2001. -- Dream Hampton, New York Times, New York



peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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fire
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111370 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:16 PM

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29. "still cracking up"
In response to Reply # 15


          

:-)

________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Tue Jan-30-01 10:43 AM

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16. "The Book Of Gear"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

alot of heads slept on Jesus' fashion sense. he puts it down, though in the Book Of Gear, two thousand years before GQ or Vibe.

Gear, Chapter 2, 4-8

The Parable Of The Man With Expensive Gear

4. There was a man who came into an inheritance, from his father, a prosperous merchant.

5. This man spent lavishly, in ALL things, and chiefly upon gear.

6. All manner of gear had he: Jacob Hilfigger, FJBJ (for jews,by jews), YHV, and Achmed Lauren. His robes were emblazoned with the sign of the great fashion houses, and even his sandals were resplendent.

7. It came to pass that this man was invited to hold court with the king, and he was sorely afraid that his raiment be not splendid in the eyes of such royalty

8. So he summoned the finest tailors in the land, that they would weave for him gear with cloth spun of gold thread. He did purchase gator sandals, encrusted with gems such as would feed all the poor of the city.

9. When the day of the dinner came, he journeyed to the palace of the king. Upon entering the palace, the king greeted him, and he bowed deeply, but, violating custom, did not proffer the token tribute of 5 sheckles. He had spent all of his wealth upon the gear which he rocked.

10. The king became enraged at his insolence. "You Fool!" he bellowed, "you deny me my due yet wear garments richer than mine own??".

11. The king had the man executed, and melted down the gold, and removed the jewels from the garments and sandals, for distribution to the kingdom's beggars.

12. Jesus: And when this man came to heaven's gate, he came as a pauper, having NOT the coin to enter the holy realm. He was cast into the pit, where he doth wear golden garb, but endureth eternal flame. I ask unto thee, doth gear hold thy salvation?

13. Far better is it to rocketh humble gear; get thee some coordinates from Olde Navy and mixeth and match that ish, lest thee spend unwisely, and be left without coin for thy debts.


man. there's a lesson in that one.


there is a corresponding passage in the Book Of Rhymes (36, verse 7) where the lord spits:

you'll catch me on the humble, no stones, i rock earth tones/
an microphones, Word Life, i spread Light ever since my birth, clones/
can't cop the steez of Jeez, dem try to tease these tattered robes/
but-pull-they hoes on the low, after the shows under the strobes/
whisper wisdom in their lobes, my game rotate the globes/
an take em back like they apostles to they humble abodes...

God kinda got off topic there, there's definitely a hint of a Grand Puba vibe to his earlier work, but the knowledge shines through, though

peace & blessings,

x.


January is Kool Keith quote month, for lack of anything else:

"I never hearda you stupid, what's your name man??"

"Rappers don't know, I'm out the hospital/
cold buggin' and illin' like Dr. Doolittle"

"I'll chew your ass like monkeys on Wild Kingdom"

"you call yourself GOD, can you make it rain?/
can you tell me now what I'm thinkin' in my brain?"

"under your arms, you're kickin power and musty"

"word to mom, I'm in my own world.../
galaxy raaaaaays... powerful"

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Blackmagicallydelicious
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Wed Jan-31-01 12:46 AM

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17. "New Okay Artist? n/m"
In response to Reply # 16


  

          

*********************************************************
"Speak, so that you may speak."--Zora Neale Hurston

"What is to give light must endure the burning."--Dr. Victor Frankl

http://members.BlackPlanet.com/MindSexiest
...to see me in all my Blackmagicallydeliciousness

http://www.javanoire.com
...where I read, sell jewelry, etc. in the TC

be on the lookout for my jewelry on eBay February/March 2001...support black owned business

"Slaves have options. There's escape, revolt, or death. But for cowards, there's only consequences..."--from Passing Strange

  

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poetx
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Wed Jan-31-01 08:56 AM

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18. "Good Idea!, i'ma ask ShaunGee n/m"
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

peace & blessings,

x.


January is Kool Keith quote month, for lack of anything else:

"I never hearda you stupid, what's your name man??"

"Rappers don't know, I'm out the hospital/
cold buggin' and illin' like Dr. Doolittle"

"I'll chew your ass like monkeys on Wild Kingdom"

"you call yourself GOD, can you make it rain?/
can you tell me now what I'm thinkin' in my brain?"

"under your arms, you're kickin power and musty"

"word to mom, I'm in my own world.../
galaxy raaaaaays... powerful"

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 08:45 AM

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57. "JC will NOT be the next OKArtist :-("
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

hate to be the bringer of bad news, but i got the following "e" from ShawnGeeOK:



Following email was sent from user ShawnGee at Writer's Block.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: MC JC/OKP?
Message: Poetx,

We've carefully reviewed your request that __Jesus__ be added as an OkayPlayer, and i regretfully have to inform you that __Jesus__ will not be added to OkayPlayer at this time.

As you know, there are many criteria that one needs to be an OkayPlayer: speed, strength, stamina, and at least OkayIntelligence. _Jesus__ benchpress was unimpressive, and his 40yd dash time was very average for a (MAN/woman) (HIS/her) size.

While __musiq_soulchild's_ music WAS grooving, we also had reservations about whether the OkayPlayer community would really respond to __Jesus__.

Finally, its important that all of our artists consider themselves fam. Did you know that Com is the hairstylist for the Jazzyfatnastees? Or that D'Angelo and Hi-Tek were both in the Morehouse Glee Club together? It's very hard to bring other folks into the mix unless they click like that.

More discouragingly, there's a slight beef between __Jesus_ and Black Thought, stemming from __Jesus_ calling Thought a __backpacker__ two years ago.

I hope this detailed personal reply answers your questions. Please be aware that just because we cannot make (him/her) an OkayPlayer today, __Jesus__ may be selected in the future.

One.

To reply to this user, please use the following URL:
http://www.okayplayer.com/cgi-bin/dcforum/dcboard.cgi?az=email_user&userid=ShawnGee




peace & blessings,

x.


January is Kool Keith quote month, for lack of anything else:

"I never hearda you stupid, what's your name man??"

"Rappers don't know, I'm out the hospital/
cold buggin' and illin' like Dr. Doolittle"

"I'll chew your ass like monkeys on Wild Kingdom"

"you call yourself GOD, can you make it rain?/
can you tell me now what I'm thinkin' in my brain?"

"under your arms, you're kickin power and musty"

"word to mom, I'm in my own world.../
galaxy raaaaaays... powerful"

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 08:47 AM

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58. "y'all believe that??"
In response to Reply # 57


  

          

it was a form letter!!! you can see where they just cut&pasted His name all over the e-mail.

i'm thinking about taking this to Activist.


peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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fire
Charter member
111370 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:18 PM

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30. "fjbj? read me:"
In response to Reply # 16


          

: : : :D
: : :
: : :
: : :
: : :
: : :
: : :
: : :


________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:34 PM

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33. "alas, it was not sweatshop free."
In response to Reply # 30


  

          



The Book Of Gear Chapter 8, verse 1-3. provides clear direction there:

1. Rocketh not robes dyed with the blood of man, nor woman, nor child.

2. Better it is to be buck nekkid with honour and righteousness, than to be clothed in shame.

3. Oneth thee other hand, if thee knoweth not the genesis of thy gear -- i be not mad at thee.




peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Wed Jan-31-01 09:12 AM

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20. "The Book Of Cheryl"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

this is one of the most intriguing finds from the lost scrolls, since, if validated, this would be the only book of the bible written by a female. so far, the anthropologists and theologians surmise that Jesus was in his late 20's, and apparrently in a committed relationship.

there's nothing in the Book Of Cheryl about his previous apostles, so he presumably stopped hanging out with them when he hooked up with Cheryl. some of the miracles he performed during this period had to do with the lawn and laundry.


Cheryl, Chapter 22, Verse 1

1. Cherish thy queen, as thee would my father, for as surely as God above is the key to peace in the hereafter, so is pleasing thy queen necessary for peace (and quiet) on earth.


Cheryl, Ch. 17, Verses 4-7

4. Leave not the seat of the toilet uplifted.

5. If thee hangeth late with thy boys, call thy girl, lest thee suffer greatly.

6. Talketh also, that her plans and thine be of one accord.


Those verses are a far cry from the JC, who in his youth (Book Of Jerome), hit us off with such wisdom as:


Jerome, Ch 5, verse 8

8. Loveth not dem hoes.


and, from Ch 5, verse 23

23. Never trusteth a big butt and a smile.



peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Saleem

Wed Jan-31-01 09:29 AM

  
21. "this is wild!!!!"
In response to Reply # 20


          

i wish the manuscripts were illustrated.

  

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ShinobiShaw
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48548 posts
Wed Jan-31-01 12:28 PM

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22. "This is an instant archive right here"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

5 D.V.S
Straight smacking bitches in the 2001!

http://members.blackplanet.com/ShinobiShaw/

"Lost among the miracles, I stand alone
And i've grown into a being that's sitting on top of throne
I've known
For many years that I would turn to rust
I find a reason for another breath
Before my return to dust"
Ikon

http://soundcloud.com/djshinobishaw
http://www.rareformnyc.com
http://twitter.com/DJShinobiShaw
https://twitter.com/RareFormNYC
PSN: ShinobiShaw

"Arm Leg Leg Arm How you doin?" (c)T510

  

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alter ego

Wed Jan-31-01 01:12 PM

  
23. "this is funny"
In response to Reply # 0


          

(am i going to hell for laughing too loud?)

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 03:36 PM

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24. "More JC News"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

The Son of God continued his interview with dream hampton in a studio, somewhere in NY, where he's recording his next release.

dh: so, what's it been like, going four years without an album out?

JC: in one sense, its kinda frustrating, but on another tip, i just feel blessed. i'll be walkin' down the streets, in bed stuy, an cats will be pointin across the street like, "Oh Sh*t!!, its the GOD, its the GOD!!"

JC: i've always tried to be a humble cat, but this really brings me down to earth. brovvas be recitin' my old scriptures, verse for verse -- some of 'em know 'em better than me now. just stop in the street an be spittin' Luke to me, yunno? i'm blessed.

dh: i've known you for, it seems, all my life. before the packed shows, and every body callin you The Lord, i remember when you was a shy kid named Yeshua Josephson, at P.S. 1 in Queens.

JC: sshhh!!! damn, why you gotta be usin my government name? you ain't printin that are you?

dh: naw...

JC: things done changed. i feel like my path has already been laid out for me. i'm just trying to get my shine on, spread my liiiight *Jesus stretches out the syllables in a very convincing, soulful tenor -- i didn't even know he could sing like that*

dh: speaking of The Light, what did you think about all---

JC: see, there you go, i'm all peace and you gittin me amped again. lets just say i had a joint on my album that was supposed to drop last year called "The Light (the truth, the way...)" that was supposed to be my first single. matter of fact, we did a white label and DJ Clue's dumbass put it on a mixtape without askin' me.

JC: then all the sudden, Monche got The Light, Com got The Light, Mos, on Umi Says, is singing "...shine my light on the woooorld". that's my shit right there. *unnghh* . i'm not sayin these dudes bit, cause i respect their work, but this just seems kinda shady.

JC: that's alright though. they were good songs. plus, my joint is all tied up in that litigation with my old label, so i'm gonna just be big about it and let it slide. 2001 is mine anyway, i'm gon shine.

- dream hampton, New York, Village Voice, 02/01/2001



peace & blessings,

x.


Coming Soon: The Black History Sig...

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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ive_been_framed

Mon Feb-05-01 12:05 PM

  
51. "RE: More JC News"
In response to Reply # 24


          

yo...i thought primo and pete rock were gonna exec. produce mc jc's new joint with guest production by alchemist, hi-tek,
?uestlove and diamond d. what's up with that?

visit my site: http://www.edeckdirect.com/~chuckm

"The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
1. When they're ready
2. When you're not " --One of Murphy's Laws of War
"The amount of love someone feels for you is inversely proportional to how much you love them. " --One of Murphy's Laws of Love
"All the good ones are taken. Corollary: If he/she isn't taken, there's a reason why" --Murphy's Laws of Love, #1

  

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mcbride215
Charter member
6236 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 03:54 PM

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25. "How the Fuck"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

..did I miss this?

Shit is hilarious man. I gotta go prep somethin now.

peace.
mcbride.

|^^^^^^^^^^^^\ ||
|****Philly Mick**** | ||'""|""\____,
| ________________ l ||__|__|___| )
(@)!!(@)"""""**| (@) (@)****|(@)

  

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fire
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111370 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:12 PM

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27. "ARCHIVE!!!!!!!!!!!1"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I AM OVER HERE CRYING!


HELP!



please, help


_____________________________________________________________________
NEGROES RULE!!!!!!!!
BLACKER THAN BEFORE


the MINNIE ATLAS project - coming soon

the funk will not be televised
the funk will not be plagiarized
the funk will not be sampled
the weak will all be trampled
the funk will not be duplicated
the funk will not be conjugated
the funk will only be recorded
the weak will not be rewarded
the power of the funk compels u
stay tuned for the future of the funk………..

BLACK MUSIC 4EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!


Dont forget that you umust pit the young back male vs. the old black male. You must use the dark skin slaves vs the light skinned slaves and the light skin slaves vs. the dark skin slaves. You must use the female vs. the male, and the male vs. the female. You must have all your caucasian servants and overseers distrust all blacks, but it is necessary that your black slaves trust and depend on us. They must love, respect and trust only us. - Willie Lynch on How to control your slaves



________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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emil
Charter member
10566 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:18 PM

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31. "tru but"
In response to Reply # 27


          

more than funny, it's TRUE.

ARE-Chive

i mean...i'm sayin tho.

http://www.geocities.com/originalbluepeanut/

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:38 PM

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35. "and the Truth..."
In response to Reply # 31


  

          

Shall set Thee Free... unlesseth thy boys turn state's evidence.

Jerome: Chapter 3, verse 44.


and you knoweth that.


peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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fire
Charter member
111370 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:47 PM

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36. "RE: and the Truth..."
In response to Reply # 35


          

i think the book of jerome is my most favorite book in this "bible"

________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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poetx
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58833 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:58 PM

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37. "its scurry, tho'..."
In response to Reply # 36


  

          

there's some people who say if you really read the Books of Jerome, and really see ALL that God has to say about clubbin', you'll go crazy.

i made a mistake above, that was really Jerome II i was quoting. my bad.

* some trivia, Chapter III was the name of an infamous club in DC were kids used to get shot up on the regular. i'm finding it a little coincidental that one of the main chapters of the Gangsta Gospels is Chapter III -- i think the club owner must have been a mason or something to be up on that.

what you think of the Book Of Cheryl?


peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:29 PM

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32. "The Book Of Earl"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

more translations, from Dr. Ibrahim Isaacson of The University Of Chicago's Oriental Institute. as more is uncovered each day, it appears that the Book Of Earl contains some very biographical info on JC's 'college' years (he attended the mystery schools in Canaan, and dropped out to pursue a music career with his group, The Essenes).


Earl, Chapter 8, verse 1.

1. And the Lord went down to the bodega, and coppeth forties for the disciples.

2. For he was bearded, and was carded not.

3. Spirits did we consume, but before such, He spake thusly:

4. My brothers, before we imbibe, have a care, that we pour a libation...

5. For the disciples who ain't here.

6. Tyrone. tyrone, tyrone... we miss you, dawg. Know that thee are safe in heavens bosom, and yet live still within our hearts.

7. Dear Tyrone, know thee as well, that it was I who got my pop to overlook that bid you did, and let thee into his Kingdom.

8. It was not for me to resurrect thee, but thou knowest that i hookethed thee up in the afterlife. One.

9. And with The Lords solemn words, did we all enjoin, "One!", and pour libation also.

10. And then we drank deeply of the forties, and it was good.

11. Be it thus for all time, that when dawgs get a little taste of sumthin, they pour libation for the disciples who ain't there. Amen.


beautiful. this is really connecting the dots for me culturally. i can see a scriptural basis for so much of what i've done.


peace & blessings,

x.



peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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grammarian
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1354 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 12:26 AM

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55. "You are a heathen!"
In response to Reply # 32


          

This is some superior posting man, just superior! I'm speechless!

"I walk in the bedroom, and she's down there speaking Japanese, 'Hey, Doe, Rikki De Doe.' I didn't want to hear that, we had bills to pay."--Ike Turner

"I don't care if you don't want me, I'm yours right now."--Nina Simone

"he wears high-draped pants, striped all in yellow/ but when he starts in to love me, he is so fine and mellow"--Billie Holliday

"and I want to remember you there/ forever wrapped in a soggy towel/ hovering over your razors/ and that beautiful bowl."--me

Q:Are you a fool, fool?
A: Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes!
--My dad cracking a joke.
Love you, Pa.

  

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LexM
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28342 posts
Fri Feb-09-01 07:56 AM

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67. "sick shit...lmao n/m"
In response to Reply # 32


  

          

PURPLE REIGN!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRATS RAVENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"There are no atheists in foxholes" (c) Any Given Sunday

I <3 Freestyle!!

"And for once, I want to live for the stars that came before me/And for the ones/That will never have the opportunity…to connect" ~~presyzion

"if and when blind, you will hear/drops of water reflecting off your skin/
the subtle bounces magnified into drum pounding/gateway splitting, roaring and consuming, yet soothing/echos of your losses" ~~jesmar

"and my own fears now/are not that i’ll die without money or land/but that i’ll die without this pen in my hand/and god bless this man, as i speak spoken words/cuz i may die broke/but i’ll be broke and heard." ~~RatpackSlim

"how can she sing/holy songs/'bout baby jesus/and mary/and not come/and save me from choking/on sweet youth mixed with mildew/that keeps clinging to my memories/cause this ain't the first time/grandma forget to save me and/my momma forgot to save me.../just always said "jesus wants you to save your flowers"/but my jesus forgot to save me too" ~~beyond_levels

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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DivineVersatile
Charter member
5491 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 07:36 PM

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34. "Instant Classic..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Dude...this shit was hilarious as hell. You are on blast with some of this shit...niggaz looking at me like "WHY IS THAT FUCKA CRACKING UP AT HIS PC?"..

Yo...this needs to be archived for real...spread the word...

The Infamous DVSJ

1/4 of THE GENESIS EXPERIMENT

The album "ORIGIN UNKNOWN" is completed and coming soon!!!!

*************************
MY VERY OWN HIPPIDY-HOP! I'M GOING TO LOVE YOU AND PLAY WITH YOU FOR EVER AND EVER!!!

Elmyra....the choice of a new generation

  

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ShinobiShaw
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48548 posts
Thu Feb-01-01 08:22 PM

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38. "Blow up Candy1's inbox"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

We need a archive here.

5 D.V.S
Straight smacking bitches in the 2001!

http://members.blackplanet.com/ShinobiShaw/

"Lost among the miracles, I stand alone
And i've grown into a being that's sitting on top of throne
I've known,for many years that I would turn to rust
I find a reason for another breath
Before my return to dust"
Ikon

http://soundcloud.com/djshinobishaw
http://www.rareformnyc.com
http://twitter.com/DJShinobiShaw
https://twitter.com/RareFormNYC
PSN: ShinobiShaw

"Arm Leg Leg Arm How you doin?" (c)T510

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Fri Feb-02-01 04:35 AM

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39. "Jesus in the lab with Wu-Tang!!"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

ayo, its the consigliere, Bonz Malone, broadcasting live from RZA's lab, nahmean. The Lord himself iz up in here -- we politicking like sum shit straight outta Mario Puzo. You got the Don, hisself, the Ruler Zig-Zag, and the Godfather JC- i mean the God's son- Son of God, aww eff it, youknowwhumsayin... anyway, we smokin' stogies like a scene out of Martin Scorcese's home movies: RZA and Christ iz playin chess. every couple a minitz, RZA goes to the boards and adjusts the levels on this nasty beat he got rockin' in the background (violins, plus he chopped up the theme from the Lady n The Tramp) - Jeez is splitting his concentration between the pieces on the board (african figures carved in teak wood) and a papyrus scroll.

hiz cornrowed head starts noddin' to the track, he squints his eyes, and starts to spit:

...makin' moves like chessmen/ from bethlehem/ to jerusalem/
cast the devil into swine/ change my mind/ turn him loose again/
on doubtin cats/ i'm spoutin facts/ while he's bamboozlin' em/
u-baby emcees? pleez/ i rolled trees with methuselah-an-'em/
so my steez be fully formed/ word bond/ i'm in the news again/ got the juice again/ bruvvas jock/ but shit i rock be confusin nem/
rockin 'LO robes/ but only if my crew be boostin them/
then forgive they sin/ cuz when i say the Word they born again/


RZA: that's that sh*t right there, God! "u-baby emcees..." haaaaaa. feelin that. but i woulda said "doo-doo-head" right there, but that's me.

*Ghostface walks in the room*

Ghost: yo, Jeez, Jeez, Jeez..."how are YOU DOING??" *blaaaaahhhhh** *laughing at own joke*

JC: starks! *gives pound*, what up you baloney head, oscar meyer yellow doo doo mustard wally's rockin...

RZA: *laughing, pulling on spliff* God got jokes.

Bonz: he like Lou Carneseca up in here.

RZA/JC/Ghost: ??

Bonz: ion't know, just sum italian sh*t, nahmean, you know how i get down

Ghost: Lord. Lord. you really should let me lace them sandals for you, ak

JC: they don't have laces, they sandals--

Ghost: stop playin, let me hook 'em up. flavor 'em. damn, what you did to your hair chief? i'm likin that. straight ziti.

JC: ??

Ghost: hmm?

JC: ziti?

Ghost: oh, my bad, i meant, PENNE PASTA, you noodle haid rasta

JC: aaaah, i wuz bout to say, ziti is like shells or some sh*t

Bonz: Jeez, tell me about Rome, yo, did they have the cosa nostra back in the day

JC: *looking at Bonz like he's crazy* WTF?? they kilt me, dun, you know i don't like talkin' about that

Bonz: my bad.

Bonz: so lets speak on this project

RZA: *spraying saliva* yo, we gonna re-christen Christ, baptize him as part of the Wu, you know what i'm saying. release a 'EP some time next year under the pseudonymn "Masta Teacha".

JC: that's gonna be my bob digi -- that's gonna be that ill joint where i just say whatever, change my style up a little

Ghost: an pull cards, build on the joint where you dis Kurt Franklin

RZA/JC *laughing, respond in unison*: naaaah, heads ain't ready to hear that yet

Ghost: let's talk about *stops, looks confused* ayo, which one of y'all f*cks drank the last of the Remy?? If you don't bring me some muhf*kn cognac, i'll KILL you???!!! *to know one in particular*

JC: *touches empty kool aid pitcher which miraculously fills to the brim with Henny* oh y'all of little faith! *cracks up laughing*

Ghost: thats why you my booooy!

RZA: um, this bag of trees is gettin kinda light, cuzzin, you mind touchin the ziploc

JC: *sighs, touches bag*

JC: *moves Queen diagonally across board, takes rook*

JC: checkmate

RZA: *sucks teeth*. that's alright. i'm gonna get me one of them big ass computers -- run a coax cable from the modem of that shit, up my assh*le and plug it into my spine. put the battery in my back. then we'll see who checkin what...

Bonz: yall got any spaghetti? lasagna?






peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Negmarron
Member since Feb 03rd 2004
4 posts
Sun Feb-04-01 03:52 PM

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44. "itll be"
In response to Reply # 39


  

          

jesus and his disciples

when the ep droppin

That gentleman has arrived there, and hopefully he is not as stupid as he seems, nor as mafia like his background makes him appear - Castro

hot shit (sort of) ----> http://www.spaceports.com/~terran/

I'm powerful, beautiful, exellent (c) John Forte

My unorthodox style of attack is like Hannibal, rollin on elephants backs - Rebel INS

crazy haitian\|/ayisyen fou/|\loco haitian\|/pazzesco haitian/|\verrücktes haitian\|/louco haitian/|\aim

themesongin it bringin the pain to apollo kids

J'ai le sang de mille guerriers Haitiens dans mes veins.

Beware the leader who bangs the drums of war in order to whip the citizenry into a patriotic fervor, for patriotism is indeed a double- edged sword. It both emboldens the blood, just as it narrow

  

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fire
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111370 posts
Fri Feb-02-01 12:55 PM

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40. "^"
In response to Reply # 0


          

_____________________________________________________________________
NEGROES RULE!!!!!!!!
BLACKER THAN BEFORE


the MINNIE ATLAS project - coming soon

the funk will not be televised
the funk will not be plagiarized
the funk will not be sampled
the weak will all be trampled
the funk will not be duplicated
the funk will not be conjugated
the funk will only be recorded
the weak will not be rewarded
the power of the funk compels u
stay tuned for the future of the funk………..

BLACK MUSIC 4EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!


Dont forget that you umust pit the young back male vs. the old black male. You must use the dark skin slaves vs the light skinned slaves and the light skin slaves vs. the dark skin slaves. You must use the female vs. the male, and the male vs. the female. You must have all your caucasian servants and overseers distrust all blacks, but it is necessary that your black slaves trust and depend on us. They must love, respect and trust only us. - Willie Lynch on How to control your slaves

The Negro revolution is controlled by foxy white liberals, by the Government itself. But the Black Revolution is controlled only by God. -Malcolm X/Speech, 1 Dec. 1963, New York City.




________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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fire
Charter member
111370 posts
Fri Feb-02-01 02:49 PM

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41. "i said ^!!!!!!"
In response to Reply # 0


          

_____________________________________________________________________
NEGROES RULE!!!!!!!!
BLACKER THAN BEFORE


the MINNIE ATLAS project - coming soon

the funk will not be televised
the funk will not be plagiarized
the funk will not be sampled
the weak will all be trampled
the funk will not be duplicated
the funk will not be conjugated
the funk will only be recorded
the weak will not be rewarded
the power of the funk compels u
stay tuned for the future of the funk………..

BLACK MUSIC 4EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!


Dont forget that you umust pit the young back male vs. the old black male. You must use the dark skin slaves vs the light skinned slaves and the light skin slaves vs. the dark skin slaves. You must use the female vs. the male, and the male vs. the female. You must have all your caucasian servants and overseers distrust all blacks, but it is necessary that your black slaves trust and depend on us. They must love, respect and trust only us. - Willie Lynch on How to control your slaves

The Negro revolution is controlled by foxy white liberals, by the Government itself. But the Black Revolution is controlled only by God. -Malcolm X/Speech, 1 Dec. 1963, New York City.




________________________________________
who gonna check me boo?!

www.twitter.com/firefire100
http://instagram.com/firefire100
www.philadelphiaeagles.com

  

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shockzilla
Charter member
37796 posts
Sun Feb-04-01 08:34 PM

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45. "JESUS CHRIST!!!"
In response to Reply # 0


          

enough with the blasphemy, already..

(and btw, poetx IS god)

s ck


  

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Mr_McFeely
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23366 posts
Sun Feb-04-01 08:49 PM

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46. "bite-er"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

u makin me itch

real talk.

http://okp.hypnagogics.com/

www.myspace.com/hirethevoice

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Sun Feb-04-01 10:05 PM

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47. "we interrupt the MC Jesus chronicles"
In response to Reply # 46


  

          

**official disclaimer**

The Gangsta Gospels: MC Jesus 2001 - has been brought to you by poetx of the poetx broadcasting agency.

the 2001 chronicles are based loosely upon the character of MC Jesus, who initially appeared in early 2000, in the MC Jesus Chronicles vols I, II and III, which were originally broadcast on okayplayer.com and featured the demented postings of McFeely, Guiness, poetx, and a lot of other muhf*ckas who i can't remember write now and will therefore not mention. said chronicles inexplicably were not archived the first time around, and poetx took it upon himself to produce a sequel without consultation from the aforementioned parties.

however, as chronicles I, II and III were themselves derivative creations of a literary work which has been in the public domain for 2000 years, any parties concerned about infringement upon said derivative works are entitled to eat a dick.

thank you. you may now return to your regularly scheduled blasphemy.




peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Sun Feb-04-01 10:42 PM

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48. "Jesus speaks on Hate"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

the following are excerpted from the Book of Ray-Ray, and the spirit moved me to share them with you:


Ray-Ray, Chapter 21, verses 1-20...


1. And all throughout the land word spread of the miraculous powers of the Lord.

2. HIS gifts became known even unto Grandmaster Saul and the Furious Pharisees, who, until HIS coming, had rocked the synagogues muchly.

3. But the people soon clamored to hear Jesus -- his shows exceeded the fire commissioner's capacity, and his mixtapes were sold from Bethlehem to Gaililee.

4. No one rocketh a crowd the way Jesus do, exclaimed the throngs, in the house of Jacob and Isaac.

5. And the hearts of the Furious Pharisees became hardened toward the steez of Jeez.

6. It came to pass that when he would catcheth wreck, the Pharisees would deny that wreck was caught.

7. And when he turneth water to Henny, they proclaimeth that it be not VSOP.

8. When the Lord heard of their grumblings, he had Earl book a jam at the biggest temple in Jerusalem, one frequented by the Pharisees, as well as the multitudes.

9. Christ's street team toiled much, and covered, lo, the whole of Jerusalem with flyers and posters, and handed out stickers at the markets.

10. On a sabbath night, the multitudes came, to hear the Christ. And it proceeded thus:

11. The multitudes cheered and asked that the Lord kicketh a freestyle, and he saith to them: "Tonight I freestyleth NOT."

12. The multitude then asked that he beatbox, and he responded: "Tonight I shall NOT beatbox for thee, neither shall I get upon the one's and two's, nor even lipsync to a DAT".

13. The multitude, cheering less, began to question the Lord. "Make us some cognac, then, Lord", they entreated. But he replied that he had not come to make Hennessee, nor Remy, nor any other brand of spirit.

14. Grandmaster Saul then, making jest of Christ, called him out, thusly, "he ain't performin, he brought y'all out here to listen to Ray-Ray an 'nem -- he tryin to pump up the FlipScroll Squad.

15. Enough!!! Cried the lord, loud enough to be heard above the treble and the bass, and the midrange. I have NOT come to big-up the FlipScroll squad (whose album droppeth on BethJam records on February 14th, and be sure to check for CherylDigga in the spring). I have come because there be those that hate on the lord, and i will speak on this now, that it may be put to rest anon. And the lord spake thus:

16. Hate not, lest thee be hated.

17. Thou must not hate the player, although thou may hate upon the game.

18. Let he who is without game cast the first hate.

19. I am not deserving of this hate, and yet I know that there are those who will always hate upon me. Punketh Beeyotches. But for the rest of thee, I ask, do i NOT always rocketh the party? Do I NOT always come correct?

20. If thee would answer yea, then I say unto thee, releaseth my jock. After his piece was said, the Lord then turned to Jerome and said, kicketh that ish, and proceeded to freestyle until the day was nigh. All thereafter bore witness that of emcees, there was none greater than the Most High.


peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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esclavo
Charter member
744 posts
Mon Feb-05-01 01:07 AM

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49. "this is the funniest shit ive ever read here"
In response to Reply # 48


          

1 leads to 2...2 leads to 3....and 3 leads to the show startin' up again..

"the revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath"-gil scott heron

"reBEL if youre a rebel and never settle for being called black by ma and pa kettle"-the artist formerly known as the king of the concrete jungle bunnies

ay yo justice i can smell it...

"no sir.....i dont like it"- that horse on ren and stimpy


ARTISTIC TRENDS
"san diego's premiere hair care professionals"
specializing in professional hair care including hair augmentation and barber cuts
$10 off hair style w/ flyer
$2 off barber cut w/ flyer
(new client/ select styles)

call for an appointment
(619) 460-4652


ARTISTIC TRENDS
6926 federal blvd
lemon grove, ca

  

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KayDee
Charter member
25731 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 07:45 AM

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56. "oh my damn!"
In response to Reply # 48


  

          


-->Thou must not hate the player, although thou may hate upon the game.<--

-->All thereafter bore witness that of emcees, there was none greater than the Most High.<--

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 12:59 PM

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59. "words to live by n/m"
In response to Reply # 56


  

          

peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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jd215
Charter member
1747 posts
Sat Oct-20-01 08:02 PM

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71. "RE: oh my damn!"
In response to Reply # 56


  

          

they're gonna think the moderators are drunk

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Mon Feb-05-01 09:45 AM

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50. "rise. n/m"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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DivineVersatile
Charter member
5491 posts
Mon Feb-05-01 03:38 PM

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52. "PLEASE ARCHIVE ME!!!"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

The Infamous DVSJ

1/4 of THE GENESIS EXPERIMENT

The album "ORIGIN UNKNOWN" is completed and coming soon!!!!

*************************
MY VERY OWN HIPPIDY-HOP! I'M GOING TO LOVE YOU AND PLAY WITH YOU FOR EVER AND EVER!!!

Elmyra....the choice of a new generation

  

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esclavo
Charter member
744 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 12:02 AM

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53. "can i get a sermon from the book of jerome?"
In response to Reply # 52


          

1 leads to 2...2 leads to 3....and 3 leads to the show startin' up again..

"the revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath"-gil scott heron

"reBEL if youre a rebel and never settle for being called black by ma and pa kettle"-the artist formerly known as the king of the concrete jungle bunnies

ay yo justice i can smell it...

"no sir.....i dont like it"- that horse on ren and stimpy


ARTISTIC TRENDS
"san diego's premiere hair care professionals"
specializing in professional hair care including hair augmentation and barber cuts
$10 off hair style w/ flyer
$2 off barber cut w/ flyer
(new client/ select styles)

call for an appointment
(619) 460-4652


ARTISTIC TRENDS
6926 federal blvd
lemon grove, ca

  

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esclavo
Charter member
744 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 04:06 PM

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61. "RE: can i get a sermon from the book of jerome?"
In response to Reply # 53


          

1 leads to 2...2 leads to 3....and 3 leads to the show startin' up again..

"the revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath"-gil scott heron

"reBEL if youre a rebel and never settle for being called black by ma and pa kettle"-the artist formerly known as the king of the concrete jungle bunnies

ay yo justice i can smell it...

"no sir.....i dont like it"- that horse on ren and stimpy


ARTISTIC TRENDS
"san diego's premiere hair care professionals"
specializing in professional hair care including hair augmentation and barber cuts
$10 off hair style w/ flyer
$2 off barber cut w/ flyer
(new client/ select styles)

call for an appointment
(619) 460-4652


ARTISTIC TRENDS
6926 federal blvd
lemon grove, ca

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Thu Feb-08-01 04:59 AM

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63. "Ask, and thee SHALL receive!"
In response to Reply # 61


  

          

more nuggets of divine wisdom from the book of Romey-Rome...

this passage of scripture deals with Jesus' 21st birthday, and, as with most of the events related in the Books of Jerome, takes place in a club.

Jerome I, Chapter 5, verses 1-20.



1. In those days, the Lord did frequent the clubs, and it was all good.

2. He went to the Aqueduct, and the After Midnight, and would even travel to Medea to catch Frankie Knuckles at the Paradise Garage.

The Two Women

3. On one night, the Lord went to the club without his disciples. He wore not his gray hoodie with Jeez airbrushed upon it, nor his namebuckle belt or his 4 finger ring that said: "SonOfGod". Verily, was he on the d.l.

4. On this night, he chanced upon two honeys in the aqueduct. The first was loud, light skinneded, mad thick, and with her hair blonded. The Lord asked her to dance and she looked at him as if he were the devil himself.

5. With up and down glance, she scanned his robes, and saw no label to her liking. "Scrub", saith she, gesturing that the Son Of Man talk to the hand.

6. Jesus, face broke, mumbled "be like dat then...chickenhead" before slipping back into the crowd.

7. On his way to the bar, the Lord encountered another woman, fine, brown, with brilliant smile and eyes that shone like stars piercing the veil of the heavens.

8. He asked her to dance, and she said yet. After they had danced muchly, they returned to her table. The Lord told her that he would like to buy her a drink, but had forsaken his wallet.

9. The woman did then offer to him a drink, and quenched his thirst with a Molson draft. Jesus thanked her, and bade her farewell, as he had things to attend to.

10. And it came to pass that upon the next night, Jesus again came to the Aqueduct, but this time, with a posse of apostles. As they entered the spot, the doorman, whom Jesus had healed of Leprosy, gave God a pound, letting him and his crew up in the spot.

11. In the club, the crowd parted like the Red Sea, as JC and his peeps bounced through in unison, feeling the beat.

12. Upon seeing the clamor, a woman came to the front and spied the Lord. Recognizing him as the man she had dissed the previous night, she sidled up to him, hips swaying, full of smiles.

13. As she approached, the men all paused, admiring her frame, and noting the scantiest of garments which barely concealed her charms.

14. Christ looked upon the woman and saw not that phat body, nor the come hither smile, nor the "its yours" expression. "Please. Get thee from my sight, chicken", he said, and strolled to the bar.

15. And there sat the other woman from the previous night. Still smiling, draped in clinging red robes.

16. The Lord brushed the hair from her shoulder and said to her, "why dost thou nurse that daquiri?".

17. Before she could reply, he continued, "For thy rolleth with me, and do I not provide ALL things in abundance?"

18. And with that, he raised his hand, causing all goblets within the spot to be filled to the rim with white zin. The party people shouted his name, praising him thus:

19. "Go Jesus, Its your birthday, Go Jesus, Its your birthday"

20. He spoke not, but smiled, and looked into the eyes of Cheryl.




peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Thu Feb-08-01 12:02 PM

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64. "oops, i meant "Ye". i need (MC)Jesus n/m"
In response to Reply # 63


  

          

peace & blessings,

x.


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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ShinobiShaw
Charter member
48548 posts
Thu Feb-08-01 01:42 PM

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65. "This is the best one"
In response to Reply # 63


  

          

I am dying over here. Please archive.

5 D.V.S
Straight smacking bitches in the 2001!

http://members.blackplanet.com/ShinobiShaw/

"Lost among the miracles, I stand alone
And i've grown into a being that's sitting on top of throne
I've known,for many years that I would turn to rust
I find a reason for another breath
Before my return to dust"
Ikon

http://soundcloud.com/djshinobishaw
http://www.rareformnyc.com
http://twitter.com/DJShinobiShaw
https://twitter.com/RareFormNYC
PSN: ShinobiShaw

"Arm Leg Leg Arm How you doin?" (c)T510

  

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esclavo
Charter member
744 posts
Thu Feb-08-01 02:35 PM

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66. "RE: Ask, and thee SHALL receive!"
In response to Reply # 63


          

haaaaaaaaaaaaaahhaahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaha



1 leads to 2...2 leads to 3....and 3 leads to the show startin' up again..

"the revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath"-gil scott heron

"reBEL if youre a rebel and never settle for being called black by ma and pa kettle"-the artist formerly known as the king of the concrete jungle bunnies

ay yo justice i can smell it...

"no sir.....i dont like it"- that horse on ren and stimpy


ARTISTIC TRENDS
"san diego's premiere hair care professionals"
specializing in professional hair care including hair augmentation and barber cuts
$10 off hair style w/ flyer
$2 off barber cut w/ flyer
(new client/ select styles)

call for an appointment
(619) 460-4652


ARTISTIC TRENDS
6926 federal blvd
lemon grove, ca

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Tue Feb-06-01 01:02 PM

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60. "*jaw drop* n/m"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

PURPLE REIGN!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRATS RAVENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"There are no atheists in foxholes" (c) Any Given Sunday

I <3 Freestyle!!

"And for once, I want to live for the stars that came before me/And for the ones/That will never have the opportunity…to connect" ~~presyzion

"if and when blind, you will hear/drops of water reflecting off your skin/
the subtle bounces magnified into drum pounding/gateway splitting, roaring and consuming, yet soothing/echos of your losses" ~~jesmar

"and my own fears now/are not that i’ll die without money or land/but that i’ll die without this pen in my hand/and god bless this man, as i speak spoken words/cuz i may die broke/but i’ll be broke and heard." ~~RatpackSlim

"how can she sing/holy songs/'bout baby jesus/and mary/and not come/and save me from choking/on sweet youth mixed with mildew/that keeps clinging to my memories/cause this ain't the first time/grandma forget to save me and/my momma forgot to save me.../just always said "jesus wants you to save your flowers"/but my jesus forgot to save me too" ~~beyond_levels

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Fri Feb-09-01 12:25 PM

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68. ""Honor the Sabbath..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

And Keep It CRUNK saith the lord" Earl, Chapter 7 verse 15.

"Taketh two and pass" 2nd Jerome, Chapter 42, verse 6.


peace & blessings,

x.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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Brooklynbeef
Member since May 30th 2002
4649 posts
Thu Sep-06-01 07:49 AM

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70. "Gangstah Jesus at dah Temple"
In response to Reply # 68


  

          


"Bust though the door waving the four-Four. All he said,'Jesus don't hit me no more"

"Forget Black History Month, how about live an African History Life"-Ansley Burrows

  

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javann

Sat Jan-12-02 03:30 PM

  
73. "A year later"
In response to Reply # 0


          

still the funniest shit.

He still shoulda been an okayartist.



What's wrong with a woman thinking she is the shit? As long as she thinks so, she can't say nobody loves her... cuz she loves herself. --Mia_Maxim


  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Wed Mar-09-05 09:13 PM

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74. "2nd coming?????"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          


peace & blessings,

x.

"I'm on the Zoloft to keep from killing y'all." - Iron Mike

my philosophy on free time:
"and next time when he get it he'll waste it on somethin' useful" - MF Doom

  

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the_fifth
Charter member
7346 posts
Wed Mar-09-05 09:14 PM

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75. "I was just thinking...."
In response to Reply # 74


  

          

*now Poetx can finish his stories*

*waits patiently for you to do so*

<- DYWM?

And the winners are:
Banana Rum
Sweet Potato
Caramel Apple

They'll meet you in May.

  

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poetx
Charter member
58833 posts
Wed Mar-09-05 09:16 PM

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76. "shit. what'd i go and do that for. n/m"
In response to Reply # 75


  

          


peace & blessings,

x.

"I'm on the Zoloft to keep from killing y'all." - Iron Mike

my philosophy on free time:
"and next time when he get it he'll waste it on somethin' useful" - MF Doom

  

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the_fifth
Charter member
7346 posts
Wed Mar-09-05 09:19 PM

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77. "hahahaha. n/m"
In response to Reply # 76


  

          


<- DYWM?

And the winners are:
Banana Rum
Sweet Potato
Caramel Apple

They'll meet you in May.

  

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