-DJ R-Tistic- Member since Nov 06th 2008 51986 posts
Thu Apr-02-15 02:25 PM
"Is it actually wrong to have certain dating preferences? "
"I like what I like" seems to be a common phrase from a lot of folks when describing their preferences, or even standards.
Do you think it's actually a problem that some folks tend to prefer one thing over another? To be specific...it's usually about preferring to date a specific/different ethnicity. Or...to only want to date people who make a certain amount of money. Or, people who only date light skinned people.
I do feel like it's ignorant as hell when someone who is like Orlando Magic away jersey Black says "I only date red bones." Or...when somebody who's 385 pounds and 5'6 says "my girl/man has to be 6 feet tall and under 200...because both can't be fat!" Or...someone with no job at all only dates people who make 200K. Of course, none of it concerns me directly, but it's still comical.
I have even had people tell me that I am wrong because I only date Black women, and because I only go for short(er) girls who are never more than "thick" (that's relative, of course). The usual thought is, "you like what you like, but you may miss out on something great because of your preferences"...that's what's been said to me, and to others on what they go for.
10. "Both could " In response to Reply # 5 Thu Apr-02-15 02:50 PM by DaHeathenOne76
But I can better understand the aesthetic thought, You like lightskinned wimmenz because reasons (I still think your conditioniing is conditioned) but I get it.
Basing your preferences on stereotype. You like light skinnded wimmenz because ALL DARKSKINT WIMMENZ IS OOGLY and LOUD...
Clownage will ensue because you havent met all Dark Complected sisters and i defy you to say that Kelly Rowland ain't fine.
3. "hell an no....i hate bananas....sure...people are gonna look" In response to Reply # 0
sideways how healthy it is tell me how much potassium it has how good it goes with ice cream n cereal n'shit and how I am a mad man for not liking this fruit(from satan)
It is wrong to be critical of someone else's dating preferences while having preferences of your own.
Our preferences will not mirror each other. You do like who you like whereas someone else will like who they like.
If a person chooses to limit his or herself to a small pool of dating candidates, then so be it. Just be willing to accept whatever comes out of it as well as be an adult and own up and accept whatever consequences come about from having such preferences and parameters.
Lastly, I honestly do not understand why someone would care who someone else prefers to date, especially if that person does not intend to date the person they are judging?
I remember being 20 years old and my boy said the dumbest thing to me ever about Black women.
This was after his family had moved to Bellingham, WA due to a military commitment his father had. Mentioned becuase it appears that inter-racial dating was more acceptable there than it was in Lyuisiana at the time (late 80s).
Anyway, he told me that he only dated white women because "Black women weren't shit and only wanted money."
He'd come to stay with us after getting into some trouble out in WA. My Black wife had to buy-in on providing the safe haven. Needless to say, I kicked that bamma out of me and Black wife's house and we've not been cool since. That was 1991!
if it's a fetish than that's not healthy, at least in the realm of a relationship, but maybe someone black has a preference for lighter hued women because that's just their preference.
you bring up a good point that 'light' is mistaken as less black.
13. "people hung up on shallow things will pull the best catch they can" In response to Reply # 0
it isn't wrong but it isn't a lifestyle I agree with
but nah it isn't wrong to have a preference based on race, especially if it's what you understand best. i dont even blame people who prefer to not date their own because of personal trauma, i say do whatever works for you
14. "Having a preference is fine. Not being open to someone because they don'..." In response to Reply # 0
fit your preference is silly.
Preferences are of course different from standards.
For example, i'm highly attracted to light skinned spanish women(who ain't? lol) my wife is black and previous gf was black and dark skinned. My preferences wouldn't stop me from getting to know someone or trying to smash.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
18. "I hate crazy people..i married a woman." In response to Reply # 17
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
23. "Spanish is a language, you meant to say Latina" In response to Reply # 14
>For example, i'm highly attracted to light skinned spanish >women(who ain't? lol) my wife is black and previous gf was >black and dark skinned. My preferences wouldn't stop me from >getting to know someone or trying to smash.
as someone in that same group you prefer SWEET JESUS THAT GRINDS MY GEARS
25. "whenever i hear latina, i think of pron tho." In response to Reply # 23
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
24. "not at all. that shit used to trample my young little feelings tho" In response to Reply # 0
as if other ppls preferences have anything to do with how i see myself or how attractive i believe myself to be i no longer take it personally but i think sometimes preferences are borne of things that that the 'preferer' took personally called ugly, too dark, too light etc & slowly (or quickly) gravitate toward something else
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
32. "I have certain dating preferences, and I ain't changing" In response to Reply # 0
Some people been traumatized by certain experiences and it is not my job to find out why. I have preferences such as "no hood chicks, no picky food eaters." I am extremely against picky food eaters, if you don't like Japanese, Mexican, Chinese, mien, Hmong, Mediterranean, Armenian, Indian, Brazilian, Hungarian, German, Jamaican food then your ass ain't for me. Shiiiiiiiiiet. That's just what I like though
SimplyHannah Member since Aug 09th 2009 7226 posts
Thu Apr-02-15 03:32 PM
35. "no, as long as you dont knock others for not fitting your preferences " In response to Reply # 0
A lot of it is bullshit though. A lot of guys have all these preferences but then you see the chicks that they actually end up with and its never that.
47. "You talk to most people long enough" In response to Reply # 0 Thu Apr-02-15 08:28 PM by Garhart Poppwell
and you'll understand that they're oddly assured about things they know absolutely nothing about. Personally the concept of "types" is too self confining for me, so I don't operate based on it. I don't knock anyone for what they do, but for the most part I've found that the folks that have the most strident 'preferences' are a) usually single and miserable and b) unable to meet their own set of standards. I do know and recognize that I'm not compatible with people like this, so I tend to stay away from them even in platonic instances.
__________________________________________ CHOP-THESE-BITCHES!!!! ------------------------------------ Garhart Ivanhoe Poppwell Un-OK'd moderator for The Lesson and Make The Music (yes, I do's work up in here, and in your asscrease if you run foul of this
49. "I don't think so. If there's a time to be as prejudiced as you like..." In response to Reply # 0
then it's in your dating. Regarding the race aspect of it, I think that's fine too. Here's the thing, I've dated someone who had issues with race/complexion before and that shit was maddening. It would've saved a lot of time if they kept it real with themselves and dated what they like. While I think people should question where their preferences come from and what they're motivated by, I've never been interested in being a stop on anyone's journey to racial/ethnic enlightenment. I prefer a person already have that shit figured out.
52. "nothing wrong with that, can't be datin just anybody" In response to Reply # 0
can't be mad cause a person has a type, BUT ......if you have a type, or "rules", PLEASE stop complaining all the time about how you can't find anyone to be with....
"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus
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