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"this weekend, but probably during the week"
Oh, and that he can’t afford to pay this week’s rent, which is $75. The kicker? He’s moving to our mom’s/his dad’s apartment- they’ve since found a place- “to save money”.
He needs to save money because, instead of actually saving his money and taking advantage of the situation, he went and bought himself a used car a couple month back, which turned out to be a beater. Of course, that meant he couldn’t afford to pay me that week and, yet again, told me the day it was due. Then he couldn’t afford to pay because he had to pay his insurance. And then and then and then. We spoke each time and I let him know that it put me in a bad spot economically, reminding him my wife wasn’t working and we had no clothing sales coming in anymore.
And then our sister put me up on game. He told her that he didn’t pay me on time because I didn’t need his money. Then she told me that he was driving to san diego every weekend to be with his girl… and that she was only working weekends, so he was paying for everything. She lost her car and so sometimes he’d drive to SD, pick her up, come back here, then take her home on Sunday. So lots of driving + a beater= nickel & dime repairs for brakes and whatnot.
So I switched his schedule from 150 biweekly to 75@week. That actually worked out and helped him get caught up. I lectured him on how fucked up it is that he always waits until the day it’s due to tell me, and I told him he could choose to either be treated like a family member or a tenant. If he wants to be treated like a family member, then he should treat me like a family member and communicate.
Give me the basic courtesy of letting me know ahead of time instead of telling me he’s going to be late and I can work with him.
I also let him know that things had changed for me and my wife financially and that we do actually need those extra funds and it does create issues when he decides to tell me the day of because it’s expected. I told him that if we’re family, then we’re in this together and communication helps everyone. But if he wants to keep acting like a tenant, he’s going to start getting a written notice to pay or quit and changed locks if he keeps it up, because if we’re not in this as family then I’m not at all concerned when something “comes up”.
Tenant: Fuck you, pay me.
Family: just keep me posted so I know what’s what and we’re good. He got the message and was solid for the last couple months. He’d still talk about being broke and talk about how his girl was looking for a new place and how she had a car accident and he was spending XYZ to help her, week after week, but I’d always switch the convo to the electric or water being due or whatever and he didn’t even suggest being late or not paying.
So my wife is back to work, but she’s at the bottom again and there’s nearly a two digit gap between her old pay and her current pay and we got a $200 increase in childcare expenses, so even with a slght increase to my pay, we’re a fair distance behind where we were a year ago. So knowing what I know about his girl and her situation and from talking to our sister, I had a feeling he was on his way out soon.
I made it clear that we’re counting on that $300 a month until we’re all caught up on everything, which looks to be about the end of September, and asked if there were plans to move in with his girl. I got a wishy washy ass answer on some “yeah we’re actually talking about it but I need to see what her plans are, etc” but I let him know I needed a couple weeks, but that a month would be very ideal. He understood and went into this big spill about how he’d never do that to me, how he’d absolutely give me a month’s heads up, etc. That was in the beginning of June.
Yesterday he tells me he’s moving to mom & dad’s, and that he’s sorry about the short notice, but, you know, he just found out yesterday that they’d let him move in and that it would only be $100, and that he couldn’t afford the $75 this week anyways so “like we discussed I’m letting you know ahead of time that I can’t pay”.
Lulz
I didn’t even bother pressing him to explain the logic behind his excuse. I’m not real sure how just now finding out he can move in means he has to do it in two days, but hey. It definitely hurts us a little, but we’ll be straight.
Anyhow he gave me this little speech about how grateful he was for letting him come when he needed a place, how he never would have been able to get his car, help his girl, etc without my help, blah blah blah.
I was unmoved. Whatever bruh, two days notice? Not ok. I didn’t say/do all that because it’s pointless. I just said cool, hope it works out and left it at that.
It’s just funny because he’s on crack if he thinks he’s only spending a hundred a month at mom & dad’s, because they’ll do what they always do when they’ve got someone else to fall back on. His pops will start coming up short on rent. He’ll need $50 for this or that bill. He’s going to pay twice as much over there, guaranteed. That’s not a hope or a wish, that’s just 20+ years of well-established history from which to glean the future.
Best of luck to him, but I’m officially off that with this kid. I’m trying not to hold a grudge but I gave him my timeline as a bat signal for when we’ll be back in the black and he wants to bail on us with two days notice once we actually do need that little extra? That in itself isn’t *that* big a deal but damn if it’s not a hell of a straw IMO. It’s not quite a bridge burner but he’s walking in his pop’s footsteps just enough that I’m closing the gates for good
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