8. "What happened to all the Grey Goose on board?" In response to In response to 0
Reportedly, a player (Nate Burleson? Probably Nate Burleson) yelled at one of the bartenders for running out of Grey Goose. In that time, amateur Sex Boat sleuths have come up with a number of theories as to what happened. Some of the most popular:
-Koren Robinson drank it all. PRO: He was a raging drunk who had just been cut from Seattle for raging drunkenness, who else would do it? CON: He had just signed with the team and may not have been close enough with anyone to get invited. also, 05 was the best season of his career, which completely runs counter to everyone else on the boat and how shitty they were that season.
-Pat Williams snuck it all away under his belly fat. PRO: Easily could have fit 4-5 bottles just in his stomach, and when you add his neck and arm folds in there? Very plausible. CON: Or was that Kevin Williams? Or Moe Williams?
-A backup running back stole them all to save on his upcoming nuptials. PRO: Weddings are expensive, anywhere you can cut costs could be huge. CON: He was engaged, stop snitchin.
-Troy Williamson broke all of the bottles. PRO: Grey Goose bottles are slightly football-shaped, and Williamson's inability to hold on to anything resembling a football with his tiny infant hands is well documented. CON: Unknown if this extends to things he's picking up from a bar or only things thrown to him.
VERDICT: Matt Birk probably drank it and then yelled at everyone for being abortion-loving gay Mexicans or something. Fuck Matt Birk.
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12 play and 12 planets are enlighten for all the Aliens to Party and free those on the Sex Planet-maxxx