I've spoken briefly about my condition here before and tomorrow I take the giant leap that I'm praying provides me with the relief I've been desperately seeking for the past 2 years.

A little background on myself for those who don't know what OCD really looks like (I've taken some of this from previous posts I've made here in the interest of time):

I suffer from contamination OCD. Basically, my mind tricks me into thinking I'm in immediate, grave danger if I touch something dirty or come into contact with something dirty.

I'm almost at the point where I cannot function as a normal person any more. My performance and attendance at work has begun to suffer (I'm a director at Oracle and I damn near got my entire team of 12 professionals laid off because I failed to show up to our annual talent/budget review). My relationships and social life are almost non-existent.

The real wake-up call came about 4 months ago when I opened my car door and realized afterwards that there was bird shit on it. The feeling of pure fire that coursed through my veins for the next 4 hours made me contemplate cutting my hand off to relieve myself of the torture.

I spend 7-10 hours each day performing cleaning/rituals.

I go through a 3-pack of Dove bodywash from Costco each week (I'm a guy, but it's the only bodywash that doesn't rip my skin off with how long/hard I scrub my body).

I spend close to $1,000 a month on kleenex/bodywash/lotions/sanitizers and other various cleaning supplies.

I wash my hands for 10-15 minutes after using the bathroom. I can dry my hands ONLY with Kleenex hand towels. My hands look like burnt alligator skin. Not to mention the bottle of Purell I use each day. If I go through a day without my skin bleeding, it's a miracle. BTW I am disgusted by my own blood.

I sometimes go through periods of severe dehydration (and a couple UTI's) because mentally, it's better than drinking water and having to enter a public restroom.

If I don't take my morning deuce (and subsequent 1-hour Clorox wipe down then 1-hour shower) I call in sick to work. I am probably the most regular person in California, just out of sheer necessity. I wake up at 4am to leave the house at 7am.

No shaking hands, no hugging. I've offended many people, including the CEO of my company (Larry Ellison), because of this.

I am extremely attracted to women, but no way I could mentally handle sexual interaction of any kind. I haven't been with a woman in nearly two years. I could walk into a room full of naked Victoria's Secret models and I wouldn't be able to even touch one.

I almost missed my brother's wedding because my uncle used my bathroom and didn't wash his hands (he then touched many things in my home, which lead to a mental breakdown and tons of rituals).

I can't keep any appointments with friends or family. I could have reservations to meet friends and miss it because I got "dirty" and I ended up washing my hands for 30 minutes then taking a 2-hour shower.

There are only 3 restaurants in the Bay Area I am okay eating at.

There's much more.

I know I have a disease. I know the things I do make no sense. I was a completely normal adult until I turned 26, 2 years ago.

Weed helps a little, but I know I need intensive ERP therapy. This is the life-saving solution I hope changes my life.

Thanks to OCD being classified as a disability, I'm able to take leave from work to enter the program. Depending on how it goes, it will be a 6-8 week absence.

I'm really nervous, and I'm all packed up and ready to go. I'll answer any questions you guys have regarding my OCD in order to keep mind busy since I'm really anxious/nervous.