I TRULY feel for you. Do you have joint custody of your son? Did your ex really leave the state? Or just move somewhere within it w/ out giving you an address? I think if you fought for joint custody your child support payments would be lowered cause you'd have your son 1/2 of the time. What does Maryland state law say? Sounds like you see him sometime. Are the visits arranged with his mom? Or through the courts? You need to state your case to the judge, though. That shit ain't right. Best believe she will pay for that in the long run. You just do right by your son, he's not blind. In the longrun, he'll put two and two together and see who the bad guy (in this case it sounds like the "bad gal") is. There are two sides to every story and I haven't heard hers, but all in all, no matter what beef she has with you, she OWES it to your son to allow him to know/have a relationship with his father.
Here in California there's a program called "My Child Says Daddy". My uncles best friend is it's founder, his name is Reggie Brass. He went through a similar scenario (much worse really) and and he got his payments lowered to a "reasonable" amount by his standards AND joint custody of his son (his ex even changed her son's name from Jr. so his dad couldn't find him). I'm sure he'll have some tips for you. I'll have to get back to you with his number (need to call 'Unc'). I can email it to you, it you'd like.

y'all *really* think" that you're tricking somebody into something don't you? what you don't realize is that most women decide within the first 5 minutes of meeting a dude whether or not they'll sleep with him. all your "game" is merely entertainment. - H