I know alot of people are looking at the thread title and thinking "There goes ol attention whore adwhizz making another dumb ass post" but this is serious

A long, long, LONG time ago I recieved the fantastic news that film icon Carl Weathers would be at the mall sighning autographs. Obviously a huge Rocky/Action Jackson fan such as myself couldn't miss this.

I got to the mall good and early to make sure I was the first person in line (actually I was the only person in line the entire time). The whole time I was wating I was speculating if he would show up in his Apollo Creed get up or Dillon from Predator

Eventually he came out and he was just dressed like his boring ass character from Arrested Development. I was kinda let down, but still it was freaking CARL WEATHERS do I couldn't be mad.

After like forever the mall security guy opened the velvet rope and I was able to be with my (soon to be ex)hero. I told him how awesome he was in rocky and how it was a shame his ghost didn't make a cameo in part 5. He just looked at me and nodded.

But THEN when I gave him the picture I drew of him shooting Craig T Nelson he came to life. He smiled at me with that signature Appolo Creed smirk and all was right with the world. He even invited me back to an afterparty back at his motel.

YESSSS! life couldn't be any better. I was going to get to party with The Weatherman and harem of fine women who no doubt follow him everywhere.

But something wasn't right with the world. Things took a really scary turn when it was just him and me in that Motel 6. Maybe it was the fact that he was oiled up wearing boxing trunks. Maybe it was because he kept calling me "Happy" and tried to show me how to work my putter. All I know is that the next 7 hours were terible.

Carl Weather's is a thief. He stole everything that was good an innocent about me, and for that he deserves a fate worse than death.

R.I.P. Loud But Wrong Guy
Dec 29th 2009 - Dec 17th 2017