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Subject: "I just spent all night watching M:I and drinking double IPAs, let's rank..." Previous topic | Next topic
Nodima
Member since Jul 30th 2008
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Tue Aug-25-20 08:58 AM

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"I just spent all night watching M:I and drinking double IPAs, let's rank..."


  

          

6. Or is it 7? I'll remember as I go!:

Mission: Impossible 2

It bears repeating that this is a John Woo sequel to a Brian de Palma film and that's fucking sick. Though it is also the M:I movie whose Wikipedia plot synopsis begins with this sentence: "Bio-chemical expert Dr. Vladimir Nekhorvich sends a message to the IMF for Ethan Hunt, an old friend of his, warning that his employer, Biocyte Pharmaceuticals, forced him to develop a biological epidemic to profit from its remedy." This was a movie I really wanted to have aged well, given its premise and its director, but this just lacks the star power that makes these movies fuck.

Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol

I FEEL WEIRD PUTTING THIS ONE HERE BECAUSE IT MAKES THIS WHOLE SERIES SING - but this is why nerds that decided their anti-nerd cinematic universe of choice was Fast & Furious get the side-eye. Ghost Protocol is in retrospect pretty fucking weak, living on stunts and dying on characters that have nothing to offer - hell, I remember liking Paula Patton back then, and there are some fun gags that point out how stupid this entire series is - but really this movie is the glue gloves and a real drag otherwise. "May there be peace on Earth."

Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation

Villain's great, actors are great, cinematography is great...but maybe I feel that way because of what I'm going to say later? I just can't shake this feeling that I already want to yell at myself in a hotel bathroom over this one. He rode a plane INTO THE SKY FROM THE OUTSIDE OF IT.

Mission: Impossible III

I think every M:I fan would love to rank this movie higher (than the two movies I just ranked it higher than) given the extremely succulent performance from PSH...but there's plenty of other movie here, and a lot of it is trying to justify M:I2 in a way that just feels like cheese left out on the counter. Half the fun of cheese is the risk it'll wreck you, the other half being "Oh no, it's fine. I always spill red wine on my white custom made shirt."

Mission: Impossible

Started it all, epic twists, devious stunts...but I still feel like I don't really get it whenever I watch this movie, and the De Palma of it all makes me feel like I'm supposed to be getting it. In some ways my favorite thing about this stupid fucking franchise is that it started from such humble - but not quite DVD-thieving street racers - levels of espionage and gotcha filmmaking.

Mission: Impossible - Fallout

This movie is utterly stupid and I don't care at all! The dialogue is so on the nose, the character motivation so willfully pointless, the blocking and acting so deliciously aware of its occurring in a movie but also, strangely and at the most unexpected times weighty and personable...this could really just be a thread about how awesome Fallout is and I'd totally accept that. How did they film that helicopter scene? How did they make a scene where Ving Rhames, who's really just been a cameo in this series for nearly a decade, and Michelle Monaghan, who you've really got to care about M:I3's actual story and Jeremy Renner's character arc to remember was even a part of this series, dismantle one third of a nuclear explosion the emotional crux of this entire double trilogy?

Can Top Gun: Maverick even hope to be not great?

~~~~~~~~~
"This is the streets, and I am the trap." � Jay Bilas
http://www.popmatters.com/pm/archive/contributor/517
Hip Hop Handbook: http://tinyurl.com/ll4kzz

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
I'll Bite...
Aug 25th 2020
1
Where are your double IPA rankings?
Aug 25th 2020
2
is that what it's like to be possessed by frank longo?
Aug 25th 2020
3
Was he wearing a Duke jersey and hat when he posted?
Aug 25th 2020
4
he had a beer flight on his chest and the laptop mounted above
Aug 26th 2020
7
a true LOL
Aug 28th 2020
14
2 is the only one I dislike
Aug 26th 2020
5
you've got to revisit, man.
Aug 26th 2020
6
2 is terrible through any lens
Aug 26th 2020
8
      boooooooo
Aug 26th 2020
9
           lol, I also rewatched it a couple months ago
Aug 27th 2020
11
                I say again, unto thee, booooooooooo
Aug 27th 2020
13
My first post in a minute. I'll bite.
Aug 27th 2020
10
1. Mission: Impossible
Aug 27th 2020
12
Love the series, my rankings:
Sep 03rd 2020
15
Rank
Sep 03rd 2020
16
#3 is the worst of them to me
Sep 03rd 2020
17
we literally just rewatched all of them (in reverse order)
Sep 14th 2020
18
yall are killing me saying 3 is bad lmao
Sep 14th 2020
19
It's definitely not bad! It's just the worst in a fantastic series.
Sep 14th 2020
20
      All are at least passable, but II is worse than III
Sep 18th 2020
21
           You summed up exactly why II is better than III! lol
Sep 18th 2020
22
Aight let’s go.... 6,1, 4, 5, 2, 3
Sep 19th 2020
23
This is acceptable.
Sep 19th 2020
24
      I remember watching 2 in theaters & diving onto every couch...
Sep 19th 2020
25

spenzalii
Member since Jan 02nd 2004
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Tue Aug-25-20 12:08 PM

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1. "I'll Bite..."
In response to Reply # 0
Tue Aug-25-20 12:12 PM by spenzalii

  

          

MI:II. John Woo flick. Not exactly a MI flick. Early 2000 movies did not age well

MI: GP. Probably has the coldest stunts of all of them. Paula looked fine as f*ck. The Kremlin bit was great. So was the skyscraper scene. 'Mission Accomplished' was hilarious. But on a whole it was more set piece than 'cohesive story' (and given the subject matter I use story loosely), so here it sits.

MI. The biggest gripe I had about this one is they showed THE ENTIRE PLOT in the trailer and commercials. But the tension in the Langley break in scene is still hard to beat today.

MI:III. Probably the most grounded since the first one. Didn't really care how PSH ended up dying, but I did like how the Rabbit's Foot didn't even matter. The breakout scene on the bridge was fun. Maggie Q is always nice to see. Probably the 'anti-MI:II', but as a mini reset it was fine

MI:RN. This wins simply by doing Spectre better than Bond did. The energy GP had was refined and reworked with better characters and a better story which made this one rock from beginning to end. While I like Solomon Lane, I never really felt him a threat (and why he's shooting at Ethan at the end when he's the only one that can get him the account codes I have no clue). Rebecca Ferguson was fantastic. Oh yeah, Cruise on the side of a plane? Come on!

MI:F. I was literally on the edge of my seat at the end of this movie (even though Ethan can't lose). I do wish they didn't have to kill Cavill, as I loved his take on John Lark. Absolutely worth hosing Wheden's Justice League.

<-- Dave Thomas knows what's up...
__________________________

Jay: Look here homie, any nigga can get a hit record. This here is about respect.
Game: Like Gladys Knight.
Jay: Aretha Franklin.
Game: Word, I like her too.
Jay: Nigga...

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
83324 posts
Tue Aug-25-20 05:44 PM

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2. "Where are your double IPA rankings?"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

My M:I rankings:

M:I III: yes, PSH absolutely rules, but every time he's off screen, this movie plays a lot more like a random episode of Alias. One or two cool action sequences, and the Vatican bit is a highlight. But ultimately, this movie is PSH and change.

M:I II: prime John Woo goodness. Might honestly belong higher on the list in terms of sheer righteous action, but it's probably a better Woo movie than it is a M:I movie.

M:I IV: truly delightful set pieces. The Burj Khalifa stuff is untoppable. That said, three things bring this down a bit: 1. Paula Patton, as well as she does here, is immediately followed by Rebecca Ferguson, so the franchise improves from here. 2. Too much Jeremy Renner, and they didn't really know what to do with him. 3. There's this odd tone to Cruise in this movie... Bird just makes Cruise complain the whole time, lmao. Which, don't get me wrong, is funny, but I think it teeters on the edge of making him a spoilsport. Which just isn't Cruise.

M:I: the original is truly incredible summer filmmaking. Probably objectively the "best" of the franchise. Good twists, great De Palma set pieces, terrific acting and dialogue. Big fan.

M:I: Fallout: the best action setpieces of the bunch. Cavill owns. Really hard to not put this at number one...

M:I: Rogue Nation: ... but I think this is the one. The tone is just perfect from the very start, the setpieces are breathtaking, the intro to Ferguson is outstanding... just a perfect spy movie. Fallout has better spectacle, but Rogue Nation is probably the better movie as a whole imo. (I reserve the right to immediately change my mind on this.)

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Rjcc
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Tue Aug-25-20 07:32 PM

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3. "is that what it's like to be possessed by frank longo?"
In response to Reply # 0


          


www.engadgethd.com - the other stuff i'm looking at

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Tue Aug-25-20 08:17 PM

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4. "Was he wearing a Duke jersey and hat when he posted?"
In response to Reply # 3


  

          

For beer lovers: http://thebeertravelguide.com
For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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Rjcc
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Wed Aug-26-20 03:49 PM

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7. "he had a beer flight on his chest and the laptop mounted above"
In response to Reply # 4


          


www.engadgethd.com - the other stuff i'm looking at

  

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Nodima
Member since Jul 30th 2008
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Fri Aug-28-20 10:30 AM

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14. "a true LOL"
In response to Reply # 3


  

          


~~~~~~~~~
"This is the streets, and I am the trap." � Jay Bilas
http://www.popmatters.com/pm/archive/contributor/517
Hip Hop Handbook: http://tinyurl.com/ll4kzz

  

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pretentious username
Member since Jun 18th 2010
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Wed Aug-26-20 02:19 PM

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5. "2 is the only one I dislike"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

1. M:I - I'd say some small parts haven't aged well, but otherwise I think this is one of the most iconic action movies ever. Honestly Fallout should probably be #1 but the Pentagon scene is such a classic it keeps this at the top of the rankings. My palms sweat every time I see it.

2. Fallout - Love all the characters and the twists and turns. The Wolf Blitzer bit early on is so silly it almost takes me out of the movie, but it recovers pretty quickly and I'm on board the rest of the way.

3. Ghost Protocol - Became the standard bearer look-wise for the rest of the series. The entire Dubai sequence is incredible. Also LMAO @ throwing cars at each other.

4. M:I 3 - PSH as the villain makes this one very rewatchable. This movie doesn't get enough credit for setting up the stakes (Julia) for later films.

5. Rogue Nation - Very good, but the least memorable out of the newer crop.

6. M:I 2 - Fucking MTV ass movie.

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Wed Aug-26-20 03:43 PM

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6. "you've got to revisit, man."
In response to Reply # 5


  

          


>6. M:I 2 - Fucking MTV ass movie.

Once you view it as a John Woo movie instead of an M:I movie, then most complaints go out the window and you realize you're watching Cruise-led melodramatic motorcycle kung fu, and it fucking owwwwwns.

For beer lovers: http://thebeertravelguide.com
For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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navajo joe
Member since Apr 13th 2005
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Wed Aug-26-20 04:41 PM

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8. "2 is terrible through any lens"
In response to Reply # 5
Wed Aug-26-20 04:41 PM by navajo joe

  

          

It's a particularly bad John Woo movie

And I say that having revisited it with in the last 18 months

"Regardless if you listen to me, in the end we'll see."
-Cee-Lo

"You’ve had 4 years of Trump University and are still failing the final exam smh"
-Bree Newsome Bass

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Wed Aug-26-20 07:36 PM

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9. "boooooooo"
In response to Reply # 8


  

          

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For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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pretentious username
Member since Jun 18th 2010
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Thu Aug-27-20 12:36 PM

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11. "lol, I also rewatched it a couple months ago"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

I was kinda hoping it'd hold up better than I remembered.

It did not.

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Thu Aug-27-20 07:44 PM

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13. "I say again, unto thee, booooooooooo"
In response to Reply # 11


  

          

For beer lovers: http://thebeertravelguide.com
For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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bwood
Member since Apr 03rd 2006
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Thu Aug-27-20 07:43 AM

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10. "My first post in a minute. I'll bite."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

1. FALLOUT- Takes the espionage from one, the stunts from GP and pays off for the previous five movies while standing on it's own and being a direct sequel to 5. Everything here fucking owns.

2. The first - A true espionage movie and the CIA break-in is still fucking awesome. As is the finale on the train. Dated (obviously), buy this movie sings.

3. ROGUE NATION - Solid for what it is. The underwater sequence owns. And the way Alec Baldwin says "Hunt" at one point will never not be funny.

4. GHOST PROTOCOL - As pointed out the stunts and the film looks incredible due to Brad Bird's direction but otherwise pretty forgettable. Shame they didn't keep the IMAX aspect ratio for home viewing like they did for FALLOUT and a fuck ton of other movies that shot in the format.

5. 3 - Sad that Benji became a franchise mainstay because of this one. With that said, if it wasn't for Philip Seymour Hoffman, this would probably be the worst one.

6. 2 - For better or worse, it's a early 2000s John Woo movie. Take it as you will.

------------------------------------------
America from 9:00 on: https://youtu.be/GUwLCQU10KQ

  

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will_5198
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Thu Aug-27-20 07:06 PM

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12. "1. Mission: Impossible"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

classic M:I from start to finish. they had to go different directions immediately with the sequel, because they are never going to make a better movie in the franchise with the same style. plus it has a super-taut 1:45 running time, which doesn't happen much anymore.

2. Fallout
they were about to burst the bubble after Rogue Nation but this was redeeming, and was warranted. crazy set piece after crazy set piece.

3. III
I need to rewatch this, because while I enjoyed Rogue Nation in theaters, I have no clear recollection of it. I remember more of III, in a good way.

4. Rogue Nation
I do remember it being better than this next movie.

5. Ghost Protocol
lots of excitement (I saw it on a real IMAX; Brad Bird!) leading up to this, and while I also had a good time in the theaters, rewatching this past month was pretty dull.

6: II
nah.

--------

  

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phenompyrus
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Thu Sep-03-20 01:28 PM

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15. "Love the series, my rankings:"
In response to Reply # 0


          

Mission: Impossible
Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
Mission: Impossible - Fallout
Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation
Mission: Impossible III
Mission: Impossible 2 (in all honesty, this is the only one that I'd call OK at best, the rest are all fantastic at least)

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JiggysMyDayJob
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Thu Sep-03-20 03:23 PM

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16. "Rank"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

MI: Starts the series off and seriously some of De Palma's best work of the '90s behind Snake Eyes.

MI Fallout: Story wasn't that great but the set pieces and action scene after action scene made it worth it. Loved Cavill as the villain, wish they could've saved the character.

MI Ghost Protocol: Loved it all, the scenes in Dubai and the finale with the cars was amazing to me.

MI Rogue Nation: Went back to its spy routes, didn't so much enjoy it as much as MI: GP but Rebbeca F > Paula P > Maggie Q. Now I wish I could get an MI movie with all three of these ladies kicking ass, I felt Paula P and Maggie Q should've been in additional MI films.


MI III: PSH was a great bad guy, Fish was meh along with the story. This one felt the most of Cruise. This was around the Oprah Couch phase and it shows.



MI II: Never existed and was a purely a shared fever dream by millions of people.

sometimes u gotta leave ur inner nigger in the bank vault. - desus

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blackfoot_female
Member since Jul 15th 2002
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Thu Sep-03-20 06:01 PM

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17. "#3 is the worst of them to me"
In response to Reply # 0


          

#2 is sometimes too cartoony, but is definitely still fun. #3 is the only one i don't love

  

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Jay Doz
Member since Dec 13th 2005
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Mon Sep-14-20 01:36 PM

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18. "we literally just rewatched all of them (in reverse order)"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

My rankings:

Great
1. M:I-6
2. M:I-5
3. M:I-4

Good
4. M:-I

Awful
5. M:I-2
6. M:I-3

It's also funny how IMF in M:I-4 through 6 is essentially Ethan Hunt and some motley crew of his buddies barely saving the world, but in M:I-3 it's this full-on bureaucracy with HR, IT, and everything else.

-------
"A man who is good enough to shed his blood for his country is good enough to be given a square deal afterwards. More than that no man is entitled, and less than that no man shall have." - TR

  

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BrooklynWHAT
Member since Jun 15th 2007
79699 posts
Mon Sep-14-20 03:42 PM

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19. "yall are killing me saying 3 is bad lmao"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

<--- Big Baller World Order

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Mon Sep-14-20 04:55 PM

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20. "It's definitely not bad! It's just the worst in a fantastic series."
In response to Reply # 19


  

          

For beer lovers: http://thebeertravelguide.com
For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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spenzalii
Member since Jan 02nd 2004
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Fri Sep-18-20 09:00 AM

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21. "All are at least passable, but II is worse than III"
In response to Reply # 20


  

          

The worst I think you can say is III was an over-correction for II, or Fish was kinda wasted. And it really comes down to directors. You end up with MI:II-Hardboiled, and MI:III-Alias.

The series doesn't really come into it's own until IV. V and Vi had the same director so of course they are more cohesive AND they built off what came before rather than did something new.

Taken as a whole, it has to be one of the most consistent and enjoyable movie series out there.

<-- Dave Thomas knows what's up...
__________________________

Jay: Look here homie, any nigga can get a hit record. This here is about respect.
Game: Like Gladys Knight.
Jay: Aretha Franklin.
Game: Word, I like her too.
Jay: Nigga...

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
83324 posts
Fri Sep-18-20 05:22 PM

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22. "You summed up exactly why II is better than III! lol"
In response to Reply # 21


  

          

>And it really comes down to
>directors. You end up with MI:II-Hardboiled, and MI:III-Alias.

For beer lovers: http://thebeertravelguide.com
For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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TheRealBillyOcean
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Sat Sep-19-20 12:29 AM

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23. "Aight let’s go.... 6,1, 4, 5, 2, 3"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

<---https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01DL9AVTQ

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
83324 posts
Sat Sep-19-20 12:45 AM

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24. "This is acceptable."
In response to Reply # 23


  

          

For beer lovers: http://thebeertravelguide.com
For movie lovers: http://russellhainline.com

  

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TheRealBillyOcean
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Sat Sep-19-20 11:45 AM

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25. "I remember watching 2 in theaters & diving onto every couch..."
In response to Reply # 24


  

          

or bed for weeks like a stunt double.

<---https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01DL9AVTQ

  

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