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Subject: "Finish this sentence: Michael Bay ________." This topic is locked.
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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
86641 posts
Fri May-25-07 12:43 PM

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"Poll question: Finish this sentence: Michael Bay ________."
Fri May-25-07 12:44 PM by Frank Longo

  

          

Poll result (35 votes)
makes shitty movies. (9 votes)Vote
makes shitty movies that are fun to watch. (3 votes)Vote
makes some shitty movies, some pretty good movies. (11 votes)Vote
makes mostly shitty movies, but I liked (name below). (6 votes)Vote
makes mostly good movies, but I hated (name below). (3 votes)Vote
is someone whose films I've never seen (a.k.a. the Janey option). (3 votes)Vote

  

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
has killed more epileptic children than Pokemon
May 25th 2007
1
lol
May 25th 2007
3
Okay I SWEAR that I've seen one of his movies
May 25th 2007
2
Now I've checked imdb and learned that my answer is purple
May 25th 2007
4
      :)
May 25th 2007
13
           goddammit I saw every Best Picture nominee this year
May 25th 2007
16
                Not a great year to see them all, lol.
May 25th 2007
18
                     RE: Not a great year to see them all, lol.
May 25th 2007
19
                          I only saw Children of Men for those three...
May 25th 2007
23
                               Old Joy
May 25th 2007
25
BB I&II, The Island, Transformers, and the Rock=entertaining
May 25th 2007
5
The Island?
May 25th 2007
6
The Island SOLD me on Bay doingTransformers
May 25th 2007
10
The Island was one of his more accomplished films to date.
May 25th 2007
14
transformers???? that trailer blew your mind, huh!!
May 25th 2007
8
I like Martin and Wil and BB was a total waste of everyone's time.
May 26th 2007
38
He does what he does. And BBII is flawless.
May 25th 2007
7
bb2 is possibly the most unrealistic film ever created.
May 25th 2007
9
      oh most definitely
May 25th 2007
12
I liked Bad Boys #1 and The Rock. I might see Transformers
May 25th 2007
11
Yellow, Bad Boys I and The Rock
May 25th 2007
15
Michael Bay gives me blue balls
May 25th 2007
17
We have a winner!
May 28th 2007
49
I hadn't really thought about it, but I like his stuff, actually.
May 25th 2007
20
So there really isn't an option for me. (waaa)
May 25th 2007
21
I didn't mean good films literally. I meant good movie experiences.
May 25th 2007
24
I don't think I've seen Armegeddon all the way through
May 27th 2007
43
I fux wit dude. him & jerry bruckheimer ROCK!
May 25th 2007
22
i think he's made some great movies
May 25th 2007
26
Is General Hummel not the coolest tragic hero ever?
May 25th 2007
27
all of his movies involve characters screaming orders.
May 25th 2007
28
RE: all of his movies involve characters screaming orders.
May 25th 2007
29
Michael Bay eats babies and drinks the tears of young Widows.
May 25th 2007
30
"movies make money, and that's why he's still working. Get over it"
May 25th 2007
"movies make money, and that's why he's still working. Get over it"
May 25th 2007
31
makes decent explody things.
May 25th 2007
32
I was PISSED when I saw that Armafuckinggeddon was Criterion
May 25th 2007
33
He's the 2nd ultimate mediocre action director.
May 25th 2007
34
RE: Finish this sentence: Michael Bay ________.
May 26th 2007
35
I've never seen a Michael Bay flick
May 26th 2007
36
...makes me cry.
May 26th 2007
37
Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.
May 26th 2007
39
Carla WAS the prom queen
May 27th 2007
44
      RE: Carla WAS the prom queen
May 27th 2007
45
           Period?
May 28th 2007
46
Red, but Bad Boys is a damn good movie
May 26th 2007
40
is a visual genius and raises cinematic action to an artform
May 26th 2007
41
RE: Finish this sentence: Michael Bay ________.
May 27th 2007
42
Last I checked, that's pretty much the career everyone wants
May 28th 2007
47
He's remaking "The Birds"?
May 28th 2007
48
the stories i culd tell you.
May 28th 2007
50
I don't know what yall are trippin on...
May 29th 2007
51
I'm an action junky, so I have no problem with him at all.
May 29th 2007
52
is an auteur of shit
May 29th 2007
53
Michael Bay FUCKING LOST.
May 29th 2007
54
can always count on Bags' support
May 29th 2007
55

Melanism
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Fri May-25-07 12:48 PM

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1. "has killed more epileptic children than Pokemon"
In response to Reply # 0


          


-------------------
"Fuck yo couch, nigga!" - Tom Cruise

http://melanism.com
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http://www.myspace.com/melanism
http://www.last.fm/user/Melanism/

  

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inpulse
Member since May 23rd 2007
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Fri May-25-07 12:57 PM

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3. "lol"
In response to Reply # 1


          

  

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janey
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Fri May-25-07 12:52 PM

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2. "Okay I SWEAR that I've seen one of his movies"
In response to Reply # 0
Fri May-25-07 12:56 PM by janey

  

          

But I will never forget the review in FilmComment from several years back -- did he do Pearl Harbor? Maybe that was it. -- in which the reviewer said that Bay deserves a production budget that is at least as large as the US GDP. He backed up his thesis well, too.

Edit: Bingo: here's the relevant paragraph:

As I watched the sorry spectacle of Pearl Harbor, I kept longing to get back to the asteroid, where Michael Bay has enjoyed his greatest triumph thus far. Like Tony Scott, who stumbled into a fascinating, strangely disquieting form of airlessness with his long-lens doodlings in Revenge or The Fan (watching those films feels like being whiplashed through a series of vacuums), Bay has bullied, hectored, and assaulted his way into something exciting: a singular, abstract mental image buried deep within all of those colliding images and sounds, some kind of digitally generated, platinum-lined gateway to nirvana. I look forward to much, much more of the same. Some have complained that Bay's budgets are too high. I think they're too low. Just imagine what this guy could do with a billion dollars, NASA at his beck and call, and the state of Arizona at his disposal.

and a link: http://www.filmlinc.com/fcm/7-8-2001/bay.htm

  

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janey
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Fri May-25-07 01:04 PM

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4. "Now I've checked imdb and learned that my answer is purple"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

just as you said, lol.

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Fri May-25-07 01:34 PM

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13. ":)"
In response to Reply # 4


  

          

Every summer movie poll I do, I'll be sure to include a Janey option, so that you can still participate to some degree. xoxo

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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janey
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Fri May-25-07 01:37 PM

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16. "goddammit I saw every Best Picture nominee this year"
In response to Reply # 13


  

          

... because a friend insisted, lol.

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Fri May-25-07 01:45 PM

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18. "Not a great year to see them all, lol."
In response to Reply # 16


  

          

But I always try to make it a point to do that too.

Out of curiosity, rank the Best Pic noms from last year:

Departed
Letters
Queen
Babel
Sunshine

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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janey
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Fri May-25-07 01:48 PM

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19. "RE: Not a great year to see them all, lol."
In response to Reply # 18


  

          

>Departed
>Sunshine
>Babel
>Queen
>Letters

But that's not really a best to worst ranking. It's like, two that I liked, one I was indifferent to, and two that I really didn't like.

Did she make me see Children of Men, The Last King of Scotland, Little Children, and something else on false pretences?

~~~~~

It is painful in the extreme to live with questions rather than with answers, but that is the only honorable intellectual course. (c) Norman Mailer

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Fri May-25-07 02:06 PM

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23. "I only saw Children of Men for those three..."
In response to Reply # 19


  

          

...and that was my favorite movie last year, lol.

Admittedly, I missed a good number of movies last year due to being VERY busy with theater work (starred in two shows, directed three, wrote one). Recommend me somethin? Preferably somethin I'd be able to find at Blockbuster? :-D

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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janey
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Fri May-25-07 02:34 PM

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25. "Old Joy"
In response to Reply # 23


  

          

I don't know for sure they'll have it at Blockbuster but it is domestic, not foreign. That was lovely.

The Lives of Others, which won the Academy Award for Best Foreign Language Film, was wonderful, as was Indigenes, the French entry, and After the Wedding, the Danish entry, but I don't know if any of those are on DVD.

Oh my friend also forced me to see Blood Diamond and on my own I saw Pan's Labrynth, and I think those both count as "popular" movies.

Two recent documentaries you should see when you can: Absolute Wilson, about Robert Wilson, and Wrestling with Angels, about Tony Kushner. Both are really really interesting about the creative process in particular with respect to theatre. I know you'll like them as much as I did. Or almost as much -- when I was in college, Einstein on the Beach was still recent enough to be held up as the vanguard we could only aspire to on a pretty constant basis, so I may have a bias in favor of Wilson that you're not quite as prone to.

  

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bshelly
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Fri May-25-07 01:06 PM

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5. "BB I&II, The Island, Transformers, and the Rock=entertaining"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

----
bshelly

"You (Fisher) could get fired, Les Snead could get fired, Kevin Demoff could get fired, but I will always be Eric Dickerson.” (c) The God

  

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Call It Anything
Member since Aug 13th 2005
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Fri May-25-07 01:19 PM

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6. "The Island?"
In response to Reply # 5


  

          

I'll agree with the others though

  

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analog2digital
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Fri May-25-07 01:24 PM

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10. "The Island SOLD me on Bay doingTransformers"
In response to Reply # 6


  

          

I saw it on demand at about the same time I learned he was doing Transformers.

There's a scene where they're jumping out of a skyscraper or something and glass and flames are everywhere. Just a beautifully shot action sequence.

And in that moment I thought of Starscream and said "Yup, he's the one."

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Fri May-25-07 01:35 PM

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14. "The Island was one of his more accomplished films to date."
In response to Reply # 6


  

          

Plus it was a hell of a good time.

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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inpulse
Member since May 23rd 2007
5891 posts
Fri May-25-07 01:21 PM

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8. "transformers???? that trailer blew your mind, huh!!"
In response to Reply # 5


          

lol at island being entertaining.

  

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bignick
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Sat May-26-07 08:57 PM

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38. "I like Martin and Wil and BB was a total waste of everyone's time."
In response to Reply # 5
Sat May-26-07 08:57 PM by bignick

  

          

Just really, really stupid. Both of them.

  

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analog2digital
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Fri May-25-07 01:20 PM

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7. "He does what he does. And BBII is flawless."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

That chase scene with the Ferrari KILLED the one in Reloaded that was soooo hyped.

He makes big, dumb, pretty movies. Sometimes they're wildly entertaining.

I want Transformers to be a big shoot-em-up slugfest, with tons of pyro. I can't think of anyone else who does that better than Bay.

So I was happy to hear the news.

Transformers will be big shiny loud and sexy.

Any other failings I will lay at the feet of Spielberg.

Bay is the only person to make this movie. Maybe Cameron.

  

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inpulse
Member since May 23rd 2007
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Fri May-25-07 01:23 PM

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9. "bb2 is possibly the most unrealistic film ever created."
In response to Reply # 7


          

but if you like that, i cant knock it.

  

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analog2digital
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Fri May-25-07 01:30 PM

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12. "oh most definitely"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

it pandered to the audience in just the right way.

It probably wouldn't have worked with anyone else other than Martin and Will though.

You need to be laughing at the jokes so that you're not laughing at the absurdity of the flick.

Very well done.

  

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alias for mrhood75
Member since Mar 19th 2007
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Fri May-25-07 01:29 PM

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11. "I liked Bad Boys #1 and The Rock. I might see Transformers"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Everything else sucks.

  

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ZooTown74
Member since May 29th 2002
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Fri May-25-07 01:35 PM

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15. "Yellow, Bad Boys I and The Rock"
In response to Reply # 0
Fri May-25-07 02:06 PM by ZooTown74

  

          

Everything starting with Armageddon and going forward has been pretty bad, imo

Yeah, Armageddon has some strong points, but it was undermined by the chop-socky editing and lame plotting

Bad Boys II was bloated and overlong by a good 30 minutes, though Martin and Will were comedic gold

Pearl Harbor was pretty bad, and not because it had Affleck in it

The Island was flat-out horrible

Yes, it was

But I don't bedgrudge the man

He digs big, boombastic movie spectacle

Which, even in my advancing age, I can still appreciate

I'm eager to see Transformers

But not because of the name Michael Bay
______________________________________________________________________
Ay, yo Pete
There's a girl on the phone...

  

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Flash80
Member since Jan 03rd 2007
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Fri May-25-07 01:43 PM

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17. "Michael Bay gives me blue balls"
In response to Reply # 0


          

He gives me a lots of destruction teasers, fooling me into thinking society will be annihilated (Armageddon, The Rock)... and then gives me a contrived happy ending (no pun intended).

  

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biscuit
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Mon May-28-07 03:45 PM

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49. "We have a winner!"
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

That about sums it up right there.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

*Effasig*

  

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McDeezNuts
Member since Jun 03rd 2002
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Fri May-25-07 01:49 PM

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20. "I hadn't really thought about it, but I like his stuff, actually."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Liked
- Bad Boys (quite a lot, actually)
- The Rock (ditto)
- Bad Boys II (not as much, but to be honest I don't really remember it)


Not bad
- Pearl Harbor


Didn't see
- Armageddon (are Janey and I the only ones?)
- The Island


Plan to see
- Transformers!

  

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McDeezNuts
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Fri May-25-07 01:54 PM

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21. "So there really isn't an option for me. (waaa)"
In response to Reply # 20


  

          

I don't think his movies are shitty, but I also don't think they're good "films".

They are meant to be entertaining and not all that thought-provoking, and they succeed at doing that.

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
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Fri May-25-07 02:08 PM

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24. "I didn't mean good films literally. I meant good movie experiences."
In response to Reply # 21


  

          

Plus, I think a couple of them are pretty good films. They're popcorny, sure, but they wear it on their sleeves, almost in a self-parodying kind of way. But they know what they are, and are filmed, acted, and directed accordingly.

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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JungleSouljah
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Sun May-27-07 09:38 AM

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43. "I don't think I've seen Armegeddon all the way through"
In response to Reply # 20


  

          

I've seen bits and pieces... I may actually have seen the whole thing, but not in one sitting.

I'm usually entertained by his films although I didn't care much for The Island, Armegeddon, and Pearl Harbor.

______________________________
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The 4th Annual Residency Encampment: Where do we go from here?

All you see is crime in the source code.

  

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MikeLove
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Fri May-25-07 02:04 PM

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22. "I fux wit dude. him & jerry bruckheimer ROCK!"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

<----- The reason your team's players jump into the stands after a TD

  

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navajo joe
Member since Apr 13th 2005
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Fri May-25-07 02:37 PM

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26. "i think he's made some great movies"
In response to Reply # 0


          

and made one of the best car chases in motion picture history for BB 2

i'm a HUGE BB 1 & 2 fan
i like the Rock well enough

i actually have very high hopes for Transformers. If anyone can pull it off, he can

-------------------------------

A lot of you players ain't okay.

We would have been better off with an okaycivics board instead of an okayactivist board

  

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Flash80
Member since Jan 03rd 2007
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Fri May-25-07 03:25 PM

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27. "Is General Hummel not the coolest tragic hero ever?"
In response to Reply # 26


          

"You alert the media, I launch the gas. You refuse payment, I launch the gas. You have 40 hours, till noon the day after tomorrow to arrange the transfer. I am aware of your counter measures. You know, I know it doesn't stand a chance. This is Hummel from Alcatraz, OUT!"

  

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PlanetInfinite
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Fri May-25-07 03:26 PM

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28. "all of his movies involve characters screaming orders."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

i guess that "raises tension".

but yeah.

his movies are what they were originally made for: entertainment. an escape.

just be able to suspend logic for a bit and enjoy the ride.

i hate armageddon, btw.

http://www.myspace.com/thievinstealberg
http://computerstupid.blogspot.com (4/9/07)

  

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Flash80
Member since Jan 03rd 2007
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Fri May-25-07 03:32 PM

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29. "RE: all of his movies involve characters screaming orders."
In response to Reply # 28
Fri May-25-07 03:34 PM by Flash80

          

able to suspend logic for a bit and enjoy the ride.
>
>i hate armageddon, btw.

co-sign. when they introduced a character named "Rockhound", I knew it was all over. But didn't that flick give a big jump start to the careers of Michael Clarke-Duncan, Affleck and Owen Wilson?

>http://www.myspace.com/thievinstealberg
>http://computerstupid.blogspot.com (4/9/07)

  

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DawgEatah
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Fri May-25-07 03:36 PM

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30. "Michael Bay eats babies and drinks the tears of young Widows."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          


http://fuck-your.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/insightclopediabrown
http://www.myspace.com/dumhi
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http://www.last.fm/user/DawgEatah
R.I.P. 3rd i

  

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Basaglia
Member since Nov 30th 2004
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Fri May-25-07 04:10 PM

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""movies make money, and that's why he's still working. Get over it""


  

          

____________________________________________________


Steph: I was just fooling about

Kyrie: I wasn't.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8OWNspU_yE

  

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Basaglia
Member since Nov 30th 2004
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Fri May-25-07 04:10 PM

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31. ""movies make money, and that's why he's still working. Get over it""
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

____________________________________________________


Steph: I was just fooling about

Kyrie: I wasn't.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8OWNspU_yE

  

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JFrost1117
Member since Aug 12th 2005
23860 posts
Fri May-25-07 05:25 PM

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32. "makes decent explody things."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

____________
Twitter & IG: @rulerofmyself
SC: rulerofmyself17

Yes! She's on the drugs. (c) BoHagon

  

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magilla vanilla
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Fri May-25-07 07:56 PM

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33. "I was PISSED when I saw that Armafuckinggeddon was Criterion"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

PISSED!

---------------------------------
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rorschach
Member since Nov 10th 2004
7723 posts
Fri May-25-07 08:54 PM

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34. "He's the 2nd ultimate mediocre action director."
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Fri May-25-07 09:00 PM by rorschach

  

          

Tony Scott's the first. Michael Bay's movies are good to watch when you're just trying to see some wild action.

It's actually interesting to see some of his movies because you know something's gonna ruin it all. Whether's it's Armageddon's utter implausibility and scenery-chewing acting or BB2's lame comedy and epileptic cuts, you're completely sure that something is gonna screw up the movie.

Unfortunately, his action flicks are the closest thing to James Cameron's excellent action movies in the 90s.

That being said, I actually did find myself liking BB1 and The Rock. I liked BB2 when I saw it in a crowded theatre but that changed when I saw it by myself.

I'll give Transformers the benefit of the doubt when I see it because it's falling into same category as TMNT (childhood favorite that I want to see on the big screen).

Oh, and I'm glad to know that I'm not only person around here that occasionally goes to movies to have fun and be entertained (Life's serious enough).




"Being the bigger man is overrated." -- Huey (The Boondocks)

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Vid Santoro
Member since Oct 04th 2006
1318 posts
Sat May-26-07 12:33 AM

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35. "RE: Finish this sentence: Michael Bay ________."
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is proof that even god can make mistakes

!!! did i just say that

i jus think that homeboy takes on shit from any angle but straight on...his shit is always comming off like a fanboy directed it. almost like he is neglecting director fundementals or something.

  

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rymeslikedimes
Member since Apr 13th 2007
84 posts
Sat May-26-07 07:46 PM

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36. "I've never seen a Michael Bay flick"
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but I've understood that I should be scared about Transformers because of him.

  

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The_Orange_Ninja_Turtle
Member since Jan 14th 2005
22411 posts
Sat May-26-07 08:07 PM

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37. "...makes me cry."
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bignick
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24054 posts
Sat May-26-07 08:58 PM

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39. "Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
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JungleSouljah
Member since Sep 24th 2002
14987 posts
Sun May-27-07 09:39 AM

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44. "Carla WAS the prom queen"
In response to Reply # 39
Sun May-27-07 09:40 AM by JungleSouljah

  

          

Does anyone not enjoy The Rock?

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Bombastic
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Sun May-27-07 04:31 PM

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45. "RE: Carla WAS the prom queen"
In response to Reply # 44


  

          

>Does anyone not enjoy The Rock?

I didn't really like it much......but I haven't seen it since it was in the theater and I kind of lump it in with Con Air even though I know it was nowhere near as bad. I just was not feeling the 'Nic Cage: Action Hero' period.

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JungleSouljah
Member since Sep 24th 2002
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Mon May-28-07 12:27 PM

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46. "Period?"
In response to Reply # 45


  

          

He's still doin the minor action hero thing, especially lately with a second National Treasure movie out this summer, Ghost Rider, and Next.

The Rock really is worth another viewing. It's very well done and Cage & Connery work well as a tandem.

______________________________
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The 4th Annual Residency Encampment: Where do we go from here?

All you see is crime in the source code.

  

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Deebot
Member since Oct 21st 2004
26762 posts
Sat May-26-07 09:56 PM

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40. "Red, but Bad Boys is a damn good movie"
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and Tea Leoni is hot

  

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Torez the Judge
Member since Mar 13th 2007
3957 posts
Sat May-26-07 10:41 PM

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41. "is a visual genius and raises cinematic action to an artform"
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just don't go looking for a
heavily developed plot
or a prominent
female protagonist...

The past is my foundation, not my preoccupation.

http://www.typeillypress.com
http://www.twitter.com/mtorez

  

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kayru99
Member since Jan 26th 2004
16105 posts
Sun May-27-07 06:43 AM

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42. "RE: Finish this sentence: Michael Bay ________."
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wouldn't have a career if it wasn't for dumb summer action movies

  

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Premiere
Member since Sep 02nd 2005
2177 posts
Mon May-28-07 02:25 PM

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47. "Last I checked, that's pretty much the career everyone wants"
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biscuit
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8682 posts
Mon May-28-07 03:42 PM

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48. "He's remaking "The Birds"?"
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He is fucking with Alfred Hitchcock? Somebody please shoot him before he hurts himself.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

*Effasig*

  

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filmgeek
Member since Feb 05th 2007
947 posts
Mon May-28-07 10:42 PM

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50. "the stories i culd tell you."
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i think transformers is going to be great though.

  

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Pinko_Panther
Member since Dec 11th 2002
11808 posts
Tue May-29-07 02:03 AM

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51. "I don't know what yall are trippin on..."
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... but the latest trailer for transformers got me excited as fuck. Sure, i was a little choked when i heard it was a Michael Bay directed film but, seriously... come on, its an action movie about space robots at war on earth. This isn't a deep rendition or interpretive piece on some important social or historical event. This is transformers, get siked!

********************************************
"If you think you're too small to make a difference, try sleeping in a closed room with a mosquito."

  

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kysersozey
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13602 posts
Tue May-29-07 04:30 AM

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52. "I'm an action junky, so I have no problem with him at all."
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*
*
*

  

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DubSpt
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13933 posts
Tue May-29-07 03:58 PM

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53. "is an auteur of shit"
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And I love him for it.

- Dub

I give rappers the biz for being m-izza-a-archaic.

  

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JusticeSabre
Member since Aug 01st 2006
8595 posts
Tue May-29-07 07:48 PM

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54. "Michael Bay FUCKING LOST."
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http://i37.tinypic.com/2ngzku9.jpg

  

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Zeno
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25623 posts
Tue May-29-07 07:52 PM

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55. "can always count on Bags' support"
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____________

Over 10 Years of Measured Responses

  

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