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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
51977 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:16 PM

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"Poll question: Guy finds out his fiancee's homeboy used to sex her down in college"
Wed Jul-01-15 12:23 PM by -DJ R-Tistic-

  

          

Here's a situation my boy just told me about. Of course, it is a bit similar to The Best Man, but still it's own thing.

My boy Deron (names has been changed to protect the innocent/guilty) has been with his girl, Jessica, for a good two years. Maybe a year ago, she had a party, and introduced him to Rico, who's one of her close friends from college. Jessica is pretty damn fine, like almost model type, but strictly corporate. Deron never suspected anything, as both of them only acted friendly around each other, and Rico even helped him plan her birthday before they were close.

A few months ago, Deron proposed to Jessica, and all was well. Rico texted both of them saying congrats, and eventually, Rico became closer with him. Because of this, Deron meets some of Rico's friends, including some who knew Jessica as well...but had no idea about Deron and Jessica.

Somehow, word got to Deron that Rico and Jessica used to be friends with benefits back in college, which is 8 years ago at this point. He doesn't get much detail, but hears that they were never a couple, just that they had sex a few times. Deron doesn't confront Rico about it at all, and goes straight to Jessica. She completely downplays it, basically saying "that was so long ago, and we were just friends then, it wasn't even intimate." She assures him that Rico hasn't even tried to take it there with her in over 5-6 years, but Deron is still torn up about it all.

It's been a good month since Deron found out, and he hasn't even mentioned it to Rico. He told me he's more mad at Jessica than anything, but he hasn't broken off the engagement, or ceased friendship with Rico...he just doesn't trust them nearly as much, and is even suspicious that Rico would still go for it if she was with it.

I really don't know what to tell him...I feel that it was too long ago to matter, but I know how folks operate. I've met Rico a few times, and he seems like a cool square more than anything, but it would be hard to trust, mainly because both of them kept it from me.

Poll result (54 votes)
Deron is wrong (10 votes)Vote
Rico is wrong (1 votes)Vote
Jessica is wrong (27 votes)Vote
Rico and Jessica are wrong (7 votes)Vote
It's just sex/I'm White (9 votes)Vote

  

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
cant trust her--
Jul 01st 2015
1
In the words of the great negro philosopher Staciford Adams...
Jul 01st 2015
2
lmao
Jul 01st 2015
181
Teal
Jul 01st 2015
3
and if a man did that to you?--
Jul 01st 2015
11
      I'm one of those people
Jul 01st 2015
57
           and you'd be friends with her?--
Jul 01st 2015
77
                I might even braid her hair!
Jul 01st 2015
138
                     ^ sounds like someone has better cards to begin with
Jul 01st 2015
282
voted yellow. prolly shoulda been (teal? no votes yet for ol
Jul 01st 2015
4
you're right
Jul 01st 2015
24
exactly it
Jul 01st 2015
60
i agree with this
Jul 01st 2015
186
Wait, so is Jessica lying?
Jul 01st 2015
5
Well she is admitting that the sex did happen. He can't really say
Jul 01st 2015
16
      Gotta multiply that by two at least. So maybe kinda deep.
Jul 01st 2015
345
So 'word on the street' is that got down...but when asked she said
Jul 01st 2015
6
Nah, she admits to it. Just downplays it
Jul 01st 2015
9
      that's not downplaying it.
Jul 01st 2015
10
      it is a big deal--
Jul 01st 2015
19
      naw.
Jul 01st 2015
20
           sowhat, god love ya--
Jul 01st 2015
26
                right. i'm gay so i know women better than you, homie.
Jul 01st 2015
39
                     you know them better platonically--
Jul 01st 2015
55
                          i know them intimately.
Jul 01st 2015
64
                               ^ been backstage at the puppet show; seen the strings
Jul 01st 2015
222
                                    lol
Jul 01st 2015
226
      I'll say that it's no way to know if she's downplaying it for real
Jul 01st 2015
21
           he needs to grow up.
Jul 01st 2015
25
                shes absolutely wrong--
Jul 01st 2015
30
                     i'm not at all surprised that YOU feel that way.
Jul 01st 2015
41
      well...nobody is 'wrong'....it's just if he can handle that or not
Jul 01st 2015
14
           agreed.
Jul 01st 2015
23
           yep...
Jul 01st 2015
75
SO IN THE FUCK WHAT???
Jul 01st 2015
7
pretty much where i'm at with it. Deron wrong and insecure like a bitch.
Jul 01st 2015
12
GTFO--
Jul 01st 2015
22
yes i could, because i'm not insecure.
Jul 01st 2015
28
LOL secure--
Jul 01st 2015
34
      bruh, the He-Man Woman Haters Club meeting is THAT way.
Jul 01st 2015
36
           u trippin fam, i wouldn't give a shit either way
Jul 01st 2015
73
                i'm sure she didn't tell him because of this reaction.
Jul 01st 2015
97
                agreed.
Jul 01st 2015
99
                he's reacting bc she intentionally left that detail out
Jul 01st 2015
103
                if its bothering him then it matters bruh
Jul 01st 2015
189
                That's really what's bothering him, and I get it, I'd be mad too.
Jul 01st 2015
111
                yea, but if he's one of those people
Jul 01st 2015
122
                     and what if a few weeks from now ANOTHER friend fesses up?
Jul 01st 2015
                     she absolutely should, assuming she knows that.
Jul 01st 2015
207
                ^^^
Jul 01st 2015
201
LOL
Jul 01st 2015
31
this is a really immature reply
Jul 01st 2015
293
smh... nah, Deron sounds like a normal dude
Jul 01st 2015
63
I'm in this line.
Jul 01st 2015
42
pretty much
Jul 01st 2015
44
6 years is not almost a decade ago
Jul 01st 2015
67
8 years is almost a decade.
Jul 01st 2015
71
      she's not THAT wrong
Jul 01st 2015
84
           if someone comes to me about this they get shut down.
Jul 01st 2015
89
                good for you
Jul 01st 2015
107
                i shut it down and then me and the s.o. would laugh about it.
Jul 01st 2015
117
                and really that's the REAL problem.
Jul 01st 2015
115
                     lol, yes, bc that works in real life
Jul 01st 2015
120
                     yes it does.
Jul 01st 2015
209
                     yup.
Jul 01st 2015
121
I like to know the history of folks in my house and my face
Jul 01st 2015
72
that ain't me.
Jul 01st 2015
92
      Which is understandable, just let me know if they're in my house
Jul 01st 2015
128
           sure.
Jul 01st 2015
135
Why fuck him tho? He was the one deceived via omission
Jul 01st 2015
196
b/c i said so.
Jul 01st 2015
211
      smh
Jul 01st 2015
316
           i'm sorry you got here late.
Jul 01st 2015
323
                what info am i seeking? I'm shaking my head at how much of a cunt ur
Jul 02nd 2015
424
                     blah blah blah.
Jul 02nd 2015
434
This. This. THIS.
Jul 02nd 2015
422
I agree...he needs to take a big shot of whiskey and man up...
Jul 02nd 2015
442
RE: Guy finds out his fiancee's homeboy used to sex her down in college
Jul 01st 2015
8
agreed - Deron needs to grow up.
Jul 01st 2015
and if a man did that to you--
Jul 01st 2015
38
      If she was cool?
Jul 01st 2015
51
           this isn't just insecurity though
Jul 01st 2015
87
           exactly... i did this shit back in the day and ole girl was mad as shit
Jul 01st 2015
98
                I'm sayin. Don't think I've ever MET the woman who wouldn't
Jul 01st 2015
175
           bull and--
Jul 01st 2015
101
One of the greatest things that would go through me was the idea that
Jul 01st 2015
13
doesn't sound like an old flame situation.
Jul 01st 2015
18
      i would too...especially if previously informed
Jul 01st 2015
108
           'apparent that it would come out'
Jul 01st 2015
123
                then u can't stand a ton of people
Jul 01st 2015
130
                     nope.
Jul 01st 2015
137
                          oh, sorry i mistook you for Deron
Jul 01st 2015
141
                               you did. lol
Jul 01st 2015
145
nobody is wrong
Jul 01st 2015
15
A dude I know married this girl I used to mess with...
Jul 01st 2015
17
I cant understand why she'd want to be friends
Jul 06th 2015
557
None of this is a big deal, but one thing bothers me
Jul 01st 2015
27
it should have been
Jul 01st 2015
70
      Exactly! lol
Jul 01st 2015
78
the only thing 'wrong' is that jess didn't mention it up front
Jul 01st 2015
29
Similar sitch happened in my friend circle & friendships imploded.
Jul 01st 2015
32
exactly...it's a social consideration lol
Jul 01st 2015
88
nobody's wrong. that's just their issue to work out.
Jul 01st 2015
33
All y'all sayin Jessica's wrong...
Jul 01st 2015
35
RE: All y'all sayin Jessica's wrong...
Jul 01st 2015
45
So you're saying you've told your wife about everyone you smanged?
Jul 01st 2015
59
      no because she doesnt know any of them--
Jul 01st 2015
93
           But how can you be certain?
Jul 01st 2015
172
                that is completely different than introducing her as a friend
Jul 01st 2015
198
I really just think it sucks for everyone in this case. Timing wise,
Jul 01st 2015
52
It's kinda suspect that other folks put her out like that...
Jul 01st 2015
167
      Basically.
Jul 01st 2015
192
      Not even KINDA. It's REALLY fucked up.
Jul 01st 2015
290
      HELLO.
Jul 01st 2015
297
      the op says the parties that spilled the tea DIDNT kno deron and Jess
Jul 01st 2015
315
      ^^^ lawyers & engineers in here parsing iut premises
Jul 01st 2015
329
      'SOMEHOW word got to Deron...' (Emphasis added)
Jul 01st 2015
336
      this is why she needed to tell him
Jul 01st 2015
317
      Cause it's clearly not as simple as everyone wants to make it out to be
Jul 01st 2015
330
           I've been friends with a guy I banged in college.
Jul 01st 2015
339
if that person is still a friend and in our circle of friends...hell yea...
Jul 01st 2015
91
why not?
Jul 01st 2015
100
      Personally I'm a big proponent of transparency.
Jul 01st 2015
116
           then she could at least not minimize his concerns
Jul 01st 2015
140
                I agree with you.
Jul 01st 2015
155
no-one is really wrong...but i wouldn't like it
Jul 01st 2015
37
he stay trolling
Jul 01st 2015
40
<-- has been in a stable male/female relationship.
Jul 01st 2015
43
sure you have buddy.
Jul 01st 2015
48
right. i sure have.
Jul 01st 2015
53
      k.
Jul 01st 2015
102
           2 years, buddy.
Jul 01st 2015
110
                yeah if the last time you had a woman was highschool...
Jul 01st 2015
176
                     great.
Jul 01st 2015
185
                     why would i cry over someone being delusional?
Jul 01st 2015
202
                          only you can answer that.
Jul 01st 2015
213
                               irony:
Jul 01st 2015
227
                     LMFAOOO
Jul 01st 2015
223
and it turned ya gay!!!--
Jul 01st 2015
83
      lmao
Jul 01st 2015
205
It's always funny to me that certain women always agree w/ him...
Jul 01st 2015
240
the blind leading the blind. i don't think they realize the harm
Jul 01st 2015
256
Say word, family.
Jul 01st 2015
268
oh stfu with ur strange ass
Jul 01st 2015
393
they always super single too
Jul 01st 2015
366
any1 in her circle that told her fiancee wrong. u take that 2 the grave.
Jul 01st 2015
251
Maybe it's being shallow but I'd have to call off the engagement
Jul 01st 2015
46
shit, i'm friends right now w/3 male couples
Jul 01st 2015
47
Do gay couples tend to operate different about these things?
Jul 01st 2015
there are definitely some gay dudes who are as stupid as Deron.
Jul 01st 2015
66
but its different tho fam--
Jul 01st 2015
62
god damn i'm glad i don't dislike women as much as you.
Jul 01st 2015
68
      i like them fine--
Jul 01st 2015
76
           uh huh.
Jul 01st 2015
82
congrats Deron...u win the give less fucks award
Jul 01st 2015
150
      thanks!
Jul 01st 2015
158
...it would be appreciated if homegirl would have told the cat early on....
Jul 01st 2015
49
Where's the "Deron and Jessica are wrong?" option?
Jul 01st 2015
50
ladies--
Jul 01st 2015
54
^what I just said above...your girl ain't even trying to hear it
Jul 01st 2015
56
if my gal pal came to me w/this story i'd tell her
Jul 01st 2015
58
ok but would you advise her--
Jul 01st 2015
69
the fact that the other woman smashed EIGHT YEARS AGO
Jul 01st 2015
79
It's a big deal if those guys are still in her circle of friends
Jul 01st 2015
90
      again - if my gal pal came to me w/this mess
Jul 01st 2015
95
           I bet another female friend wouldn't shade her - she'd say that ish
Jul 01st 2015
132
                *shrug*
Jul 01st 2015
139
Logical comparison has no place here, man.
Jul 01st 2015
96
oh look bloo is back
Jul 01st 2015
61
with a vengeance, thickness--
Jul 01st 2015
85
      nah
Jul 01st 2015
257
I originally voted yellow
Jul 01st 2015
65
so basically it has nothing to do with her sexual past
Jul 01st 2015
105
u made the point...
Jul 01st 2015
118
lol I mean I knew that conclusion before I even typed that
Jul 01st 2015
152
      lol well yeah
Jul 01st 2015
224
wtf are you taking about?
Jul 01st 2015
161
Yeah if I had to choose
Jul 01st 2015
106
thank you for alladis
Jul 01st 2015
114
dammit, i luh honesty and common sense. thamk you
Jul 01st 2015
170
just think, everytime he has gone down on her
Jul 01st 2015
74
RE: just think, everytime he has gone down on her
Jul 01st 2015
94
      she apparently knows him well though if she felt
Jul 01st 2015
Both wrong
Jul 01st 2015
80
He's about to Marry the love of "His LIfe". Dude needs to chill.
Jul 01st 2015
81
Toni Braxton's 'He Wasn't Man Enough' is in my head now.
Jul 01st 2015
86
i don't think anyone is wrong but to avoid awkward or uncomfortable
Jul 01st 2015
104
See, and that's really all I think Deron wanted...
Jul 01st 2015
119
he might not be built to be w/a fine woman.
Jul 01st 2015
133
he'd likely rather not be cool with those dudes
Jul 01st 2015
146
      that's one of his limitations.
Jul 01st 2015
149
      ^^THISSSSS. And I totally get that part, too
Jul 01st 2015
184
      end post.
Jul 01st 2015
203
yeah who knows how he heard it but
Jul 01st 2015
134
yo, that joint was at least on and off for 2 years
Jul 01st 2015
154
Yupp!!
Jul 01st 2015
242
^^^^
Jul 01st 2015
319
Always marry a 7 or 8 never a 9 or 10
Jul 03rd 2015
547
yep
Jul 01st 2015
127
I don't see any issues, He with her now, thats the point
Jul 01st 2015
109
LOLOL.
Jul 01st 2015
112
my only thing is it's highly unlikely he wouldnt smash again
Jul 01st 2015
113
even YOU see it--
Jul 01st 2015
125
there are billions of men in the world who would smash her.
Jul 01st 2015
126
they don't want to hear it
Jul 01st 2015
131
not quite
Jul 01st 2015
136
truth hurts.
Jul 01st 2015
      again, not quite.
Jul 01st 2015
157
           yup. quite.
Jul 01st 2015
160
           just because women DONT do it doesn't mean they don't want to...
Jul 01st 2015
166
                congratulations, yall are making the most irrelevant points ever.
Jul 01st 2015
173
                     the point is choice
Jul 01st 2015
182
                     some dudes dont respect limits at all
Jul 01st 2015
191
                          not really, because back to what SoWhat said
Jul 01st 2015
193
                               but it wasnt... it was a guy she introduced to him as a friend.
Jul 01st 2015
328
                                    even the messy person who shared the info said they were friends
Jul 01st 2015
338
                                         My dude can be friends
Jul 01st 2015
386
                                              exactly. especially when the friend is close
Jul 02nd 2015
432
                                              they aren'te exes though
Jul 02nd 2015
458
                                                   Ex boyfriend,
Jul 02nd 2015
462
                     NO, SoWhat made a statement and you said not quite
Jul 01st 2015
187
                     the meat and gravy: why does she still have this dude in her life?
Jul 01st 2015
195
                          RE: the meat and gravy: why does she still have this dude in her life?
Jul 01st 2015
220
                     you actually said:
Jul 01st 2015
194
                          im confronting the problem head on, you're talking hypotheticals
Jul 01st 2015
208
                               you actually said:
Jul 01st 2015
217
                               thanks, I know what I said. it didnt pertain to outside scenarios
Jul 01st 2015
244
                                    and that's why i said:
Jul 01st 2015
246
                                         i'll explain the average heterosexual male mind to you.
Jul 01st 2015
263
                                              i understand this.
Jul 01st 2015
265
                               LOL this is not the same thing at all
Jul 01st 2015
218
But she's chosen to be with Deron. Not Rico
Jul 01st 2015
144
      yup.
Jul 01st 2015
147
      smh
Jul 01st 2015
151
      that history would have to be shared to be known right?
Jul 01st 2015
159
      lol but when she said "yes" to that proposal that means
Jul 01st 2015
199
      I dont know what consititutes "grimy as fuck"
Jul 01st 2015
168
Damn y'all really talk about women like they're children nm
Jul 05th 2015
555
Shorty should have told him when him and ol boy got cool.
Jul 01st 2015
124
Sucks but Deron should have been wise in the first place.
Jul 01st 2015
129
Surprisingly, it's a good number of close homegirls who I have never
Jul 01st 2015
153
      Yup to all of that, but do you have a good number of women friends
Jul 01st 2015
165
           Not "friends" who are around frequently. It's different being a DJ, thou...
Jul 01st 2015
177
                ^ this is what I'm saying. Gotta keep em' separated © The Offspring
Jul 01st 2015
214
No secrets no lies
Jul 01st 2015
142
kinda sloppy, but eh doesn't seem like a big deal
Jul 01st 2015
143
Did they previously lay all their cards on the table for each other?
Jul 01st 2015
148
Not that I'm aware of, not sure how much they discussed
Jul 01st 2015
169
i can't even remember a youngins face that I fucked 8 yrs ago...
Jul 01st 2015
156
even if u saw her yesterday, lol
Jul 01st 2015
163
even if u saw her yesterday, lol
Jul 01st 2015
164
prolly not especially if we just fuckin
Jul 01st 2015
171
Ric's comment went over your head.
Jul 01st 2015
179
lmao, yeah I think he missed the part that they are 'close' friends and ...
Jul 01st 2015
312
LMAO THEY ARE STILL FRIENDS THOUGH!!
Jul 01st 2015
174
      SO WHAT?!
Jul 01st 2015
183
           That ain't a "so what"
Jul 01st 2015
190
                Dudes got two choices, leave her or get over it.
Jul 01st 2015
197
                     she lied by omission--
Jul 01st 2015
210
                          they ain't married, bruh
Jul 01st 2015
228
                               No but they're engaged to be
Jul 01st 2015
320
                                    It ain't married
Jul 01st 2015
370
They both wrong, she wronger
Jul 01st 2015
162
seriously? LOL.
Jul 01st 2015
178
homeboy in the bathtub w/ his clothes on like mario winans LOL
Jul 01st 2015
188
and if you find out your husband smashed--
Jul 01st 2015
204
      i believe that men and women CAN be friends. sorry.
Jul 01st 2015
283
           lol didnt answer the question
Jul 01st 2015
296
ALWAYS PROTECT THE BLIND SIDE!!!
Jul 01st 2015
180
actual factuals.....n/m
Jul 02nd 2015
529
Anyone else picturing the same 'Rico' that I am ?
Jul 01st 2015
200
I'm kinda in the middle...
Jul 01st 2015
206
the key point is here--
Jul 01st 2015
216
Word.
Jul 01st 2015
261
You can't drop hints to this story & leave us hanging
Jul 01st 2015
221
      lol
Jul 01st 2015
259
           Damn. That's cool they're still together...
Jul 01st 2015
267
                Word...
Jul 01st 2015
274
i feel like making assumptions:
Jul 01st 2015
212
if Deron said choose him or me is he wrong?
Jul 01st 2015
232
      he wouldnt be right or wrong. hes gotta go for what works best for
Jul 01st 2015
270
If you are friends with your exes and you guys are cool
Jul 01st 2015
215
and if you dont tell--
Jul 01st 2015
219
these 2 are not 'exes'.
Jul 01st 2015
225
What if Deron eventually found out that it was more to it than "just se...
Jul 01st 2015
230
that's not the case.
Jul 01st 2015
236
RIGHT?!
Jul 01st 2015
231
Straight dick is powerful. You don't know
Jul 01st 2015
241
:)
Jul 01st 2015
245
LOL. that plus i forget that women are incapable of
Jul 01st 2015
252
Of course they're incapable. That's the power of straight dick, but
Jul 01st 2015
260
      so true. thanks for the lesson.
Jul 01st 2015
264
<3
Jul 01st 2015
258
My example wasn't geared towards any particular gender
Jul 01st 2015
331
kudos.
Jul 01st 2015
385
Just common relationship courtesy *shrug*
Jul 01st 2015
327
      Keyword: exes
Jul 01st 2015
340
Interesting. It's wild that "date" is so vague, but even that could work
Jul 01st 2015
229
nah, you should let a 3rd party drop the bomb to show them
Jul 01st 2015
234
REAL TALK -- if all things being equal --
Jul 01st 2015
248
The good, bad and sideways:
Jul 01st 2015
233
I respect this
Jul 01st 2015
238
agreed.
Jul 01st 2015
243
oh, now u agree lol
Jul 01st 2015
269
      right. that post said no more than what was already argued previously
Jul 03rd 2015
553
      lol
Jul 06th 2015
559
All of this!
Jul 01st 2015
325
I'm about to keep it all the way real
Jul 01st 2015
235
understandable. lol
Jul 01st 2015
239
Thank you
Jul 01st 2015
249
Man. And as I said before, women I've dealt with have NEVER, ever ever
Jul 01st 2015
253
but what if you never suspected it? and a 3rd party told you?
Jul 01st 2015
406
      I try my best to not deal with hypotheticals or grey areas
Jul 02nd 2015
433
Having been the "Jessica" between two women; fess up early or deny deny ...
Jul 01st 2015
237
i think that a lot of folks thinking she was wrong
Jul 01st 2015
247
      I copped to this in #235
Jul 01st 2015
250
      I can cop to it too because I know...
Jul 01st 2015
367
      *ding*
Jul 01st 2015
254
      yep
Jul 01st 2015
255
      Say word...
Jul 01st 2015
262
      Hearing how some of yall think is interesting...
Jul 01st 2015
266
      nope--
Jul 01st 2015
271
      but why is it a "BIG" problem?
Jul 01st 2015
309
      This is true
Jul 01st 2015
272
      possibly
Jul 01st 2015
273
      people get scared the truth will scare people off or disrupt the status ...
Jul 01st 2015
275
      Yeah so letting them hear it thru the grapevine makes it all better
Jul 01st 2015
277
           ^
Jul 01st 2015
287
           im not saying that it is. im just saying its a reason that someone might
Jul 01st 2015
304
                Gotcha
Jul 01st 2015
360
      Base
Jul 01st 2015
276
      That was ultimately my motivation to speak up
Jul 01st 2015
284
      they're allowed the process.
Jul 01st 2015
289
           why would u even apologize when u would handle it the same
Jul 01st 2015
322
                to make him feel better.
Jul 01st 2015
326
      U can't treat him like a child while saying he should grow up
Jul 01st 2015
281
      True, but give me the opportunity to check myself
Jul 01st 2015
285
      who said she was doing that?
Jul 01st 2015
294
           knowing your audience is key tho
Jul 02nd 2015
437
           But how do you know if it's not a big deal to *them* unless you ask?
Jul 02nd 2015
461
      fuuuck no. if anyome has an ego its Jessica
Jul 01st 2015
337
           unless you marry a virgin
Jul 01st 2015
341
                U know? Lol
Jul 01st 2015
344
                im not trying to make it seem like it's simple or easy
Jul 01st 2015
347
                     That's how I see it too.
Jul 01st 2015
350
                     not surprised.. but if your dude hears about E from a 3rd party...
Jul 01st 2015
352
                          if he hears about it and brings drama
Jul 01st 2015
355
                               I believe you
Jul 01st 2015
368
                                    Except there are married men and women agreeing with me. Lol
Jul 01st 2015
369
                                         stop lying. ain't no married people agreeing with you. lol
Jul 01st 2015
381
                     never let the next man tell him about your ex man
Jul 01st 2015
351
                          Keywords: ex man
Jul 01st 2015
357
                               it doesnt matter if he just put the tip in or ate the puss
Jul 01st 2015
371
                                    Well, now he knows.
Jul 01st 2015
372
                                         shut up. you just wishing for another man to be on the market.
Jul 01st 2015
382
                why do yall keep talking about virgins?
Jul 01st 2015
346
                     believe it. you don't believe a past lover can be a friend
Jul 01st 2015
349
                     i dont like that she wasnt woman enough to tell me
Jul 01st 2015
359
                     Bye, Feliciano.
Jul 01st 2015
363
                          lol, ole forever single ass
Jul 01st 2015
373
                               Oh I am?
Jul 01st 2015
374
                     let me know, let me knooooow.
Jul 01st 2015
364
                     I would be okay with the info in this situation.
Jul 01st 2015
354
                          ok sowhat, we get it. you are the gay terminator robocock
Jul 01st 2015
375
                               yup, that's me.
Jul 01st 2015
376
you can't be mad in 2015 about who your girl fucked in college
Jul 01st 2015
278
willfully missing the point--
Jul 01st 2015
279
Yall wanna treat Deron like a child while saying he should grow up
Jul 01st 2015
280
DO REMEMBER! © DJ Clue?
Jul 01st 2015
288
again, that's assuming that folks didn't mention it
Jul 01st 2015
299
      It all sounds like a cop-out for not being honest, imo
Jul 02nd 2015
457
If you require disclosure, disclose your requirements.
Jul 01st 2015
286
and there you have it (c) average joe
Jul 01st 2015
295
He was supposed to to ask her "ARE Y'ALL FUCKING???"
Jul 01st 2015
302
RE: He was supposed to to ask her "ARE Y'ALL FUCKING???"
Jul 01st 2015
305
      I hear you. To be honest, I've never even really thought about this
Jul 02nd 2015
441
d/p
Jul 01st 2015
303
i mean he shouldn't have to ask every dude she intro's as a friend if th...
Jul 01st 2015
324
      exactly--
Jul 01st 2015
342
      I'm not saying to do that
Jul 01st 2015
343
      oh I see what ur saying and agree
Jul 01st 2015
397
           Don't people have the talk about their pasts?
Jul 01st 2015
411
                i try not to, convos about exes do creep in but im not asking for
Jul 02nd 2015
431
      EXACTLY
Jul 01st 2015
377
WHAT IS HE MAD AT?
Jul 01st 2015
291
^^^ Read the ingredients and asked what's in it
Jul 01st 2015
292
real problem is the smarmy T Howard dude that told Deron
Jul 01st 2015
298
basically. Ol Messy McGee stirring up the pot
Jul 01st 2015
300
YUP.
Jul 01st 2015
301
he's probably the one actually plotting on Jessica lol
Jul 01st 2015
306
      yep!
Jul 01st 2015
394
SoWhat is.......pressed
Jul 01st 2015
307
A+ posting DJ R-Tistic. Bravo.
Jul 01st 2015
308
Yup..
Jul 01st 2015
389
Some horrible analogies in this post.
Jul 01st 2015
310
deron is immature and insecure
Jul 01st 2015
311
Now NAN person in here thinks its about wanting to marry a virgin.
Jul 01st 2015
332
      A few folks have said some similar shit though. They're all missing
Jul 01st 2015
334
i've been where Jessica is...almost.
Jul 01st 2015
313
no you werent, because you like drama.
Jul 01st 2015
318
how can i serve you, seasoned vet?
Jul 01st 2015
321
      a glitter bomb would suffice
Jul 01st 2015
333
You? probably not - you've established you/they don't care
Jul 01st 2015
356
      Right. I'd be inclined to break up with Deron over his reaction to this.
Jul 01st 2015
361
good post
Jul 01st 2015
314
agreed - kept me busy and entertained for quite awhile.
Jul 01st 2015
358
Niggas know how niggas get down b.
Jul 01st 2015
335
smh at letting some random nigga do your dirty work for you
Jul 01st 2015
348
Not a big deal to me..
Jul 01st 2015
353
RE: Guy finds out his fiancee's homeboy used to sex her down in college
Jul 01st 2015
362
exactly, how the fuck is HE in the wrong?
Jul 01st 2015
365
Me, you, all of us. We are all going to be dead someday. Does this matte...
Jul 01st 2015
378
no.. it;s simply about being honest and up front with your fiancé
Jul 01st 2015
379
      you should post about it a few more times
Jul 01st 2015
380
           sees it ^^^^
Jul 01st 2015
383
           We all intend to. It's a message board, genius.
Jul 01st 2015
384
           dude is a clown
Jul 01st 2015
392
           ^^ has legsdiamond confused for SoWhat
Jul 01st 2015
390
           Lmao
Jul 01st 2015
401
damn, everybody knew but, Deron...that's fucked up....geesh...
Jul 01st 2015
387
the person probably said "I don't know how you do it man...
Jul 01st 2015
388
lulz
Jul 01st 2015
395
dude prolly felt bad Deron wasnt in the loop
Jul 01st 2015
396
they're setting Deron up
Jul 01st 2015
416
Your boy is creating his own unhappiness
Jul 01st 2015
391
or he finds a woman who is woman enough to not set him up
Jul 01st 2015
398
Set him up?
Jul 01st 2015
417
      yes, set him up. we all have a past...
Jul 02nd 2015
438
           there is a difference between being a "friend" vs being a friend
Jul 02nd 2015
463
                what i did in my past is my business until that person meets my wife
Jul 02nd 2015
498
                     I understand your point
Jul 02nd 2015
519
lmao...he JUST found out...y'all are trollin'...there is no human being
Jul 01st 2015
399
basically
Jul 01st 2015
402
Trolling?
Jul 01st 2015
420
      but the issue is Deron didnt know she liked to chill with an old lover
Jul 02nd 2015
435
           There is a reason why Jessica and Rico didn't say anything
Jul 02nd 2015
460
                I wouldnt seriously date a woman with a kid. i tried, it wasn't for me
Jul 02nd 2015
466
                     Question: Why is it important for you to know...?
Jul 02nd 2015
483
RE: Your boy is creating his own unhappiness
Jul 01st 2015
400
I hear you, but..
Jul 02nd 2015
423
*pets babyyoda* love you, i do...still.
Jul 01st 2015
404
Eh
Jul 02nd 2015
425
he sure is.
Jul 01st 2015
409
if he buggin, jessica probably needs to dump his lame ass
Jul 01st 2015
403
RE: if he buggin, jessica probably needs to dump his lame ass
Jul 01st 2015
405
ikr
Jul 01st 2015
408
that dude Rico has been buzzing around for EIGHT YEARS
Jul 01st 2015
407
RE: that dude Rico has been buzzing around for EIGHT YEARS
Jul 01st 2015
410
      so true.
Jul 01st 2015
413
           RE: so true.
Jul 01st 2015
418
           this secret baby angle is awesome.
Jul 02nd 2015
436
                or a secret abortion? like the sands of time, these are....
Jul 02nd 2015
439
the kink in the chain is that everyone knew but, Deron.
Jul 01st 2015
412
      the real kink is
Jul 01st 2015
414
      lmao...
Jul 01st 2015
419
      lol@ you knowing my feelings on this issue
Jul 02nd 2015
428
This post is the "Aight.......bet" of the year.
Jul 01st 2015
415
dammit...late on the count...lol.
Jul 01st 2015
421
Some you are really stuck in the Victorian age.
Jul 02nd 2015
426
And some of u are stuck up your own asses, but to each their own
Jul 02nd 2015
427
Kind of feels good, though.
Jul 02nd 2015
429
RE: Some you are really stuck in the Victorian age.
Jul 02nd 2015
430
Awaiting post from DEMONTAVIUS
Jul 02nd 2015
440
Deron has to decide if he's cool with a lying & deceitful fiancee
Jul 02nd 2015
443
I smashed a couple of my female friends back in the day
Jul 02nd 2015
444
Ya'll know you've been introduced to an Ex's new SO
Jul 02nd 2015
445
dude is looking at the wall of photos like the cop in usual suspects
Jul 02nd 2015
447
      LMAO. Those wink smileys she put in her texts have new meaning now
Jul 02nd 2015
450
           "i told you that you would like Rico, hes cool... like a big brother"
Jul 02nd 2015
469
this post is pissing me off.
Jul 02nd 2015
446
Why, fam? Keep it a hunnit.
Jul 02nd 2015
Why, fam? Keep it a hunnit.
Jul 02nd 2015
456
Crazy how folks are in here e-shaming Deron for having feelings
Jul 02nd 2015
448
Men can't have emotions; shouldn't mind his fiancee's lies of omission
Jul 02nd 2015
449
he should marry a virgin.
Jul 02nd 2015
464
So many pleas copped for Jessica in here, yall THAT committed to GW?
Jul 02nd 2015
451
This post needs Memes
Jul 02nd 2015
452
bruh, lol. yall niggas TRIPPIN
Jul 02nd 2015
453
who woulda thought the plot to the best man would get so many replies
Jul 02nd 2015
454
like we didn't see the movie
Jul 02nd 2015
459
She should ve told him
Jul 02nd 2015
455
Ladies get money & ignore these types of insecurity temper tantrums.
Jul 02nd 2015
465
smh.. this isnt about being a virgin
Jul 02nd 2015
467
      it's also not about casual sex with no strings being some sort of
Jul 02nd 2015
468
      they cam be friends... just let me know so I can decide if im cool with ...
Jul 02nd 2015
470
      are lies of omission not lies? Is honesty not expected in relationships?...
Jul 02nd 2015
471
           which goes back to my point
Jul 02nd 2015
473
                this is about everyone BUT Deron knowing... period
Jul 02nd 2015
480
                k
Jul 02nd 2015
481
                Jess & Rico good at keepin quiet so we don't know whats gone on lately
Jul 02nd 2015
488
                     isit wasnt a big deal so i didnt tell you
Jul 02nd 2015
494
                          Why would your lover/SO/fiancee ever want you out there like that?
Jul 02nd 2015
500
                               out there like how?
Jul 02nd 2015
504
                               They didn't "go about they biz", they still chill together heavy
Jul 02nd 2015
510
                               well, a lot of people on here struggle with relationships
Jul 02nd 2015
506
      RE: smh.. this isnt about being a virgin
Jul 02nd 2015
474
      not exes.
Jul 02nd 2015
475
      This is about his fragile ego being caught off-guard
Jul 02nd 2015
476
      that's really what it is
Jul 02nd 2015
479
      well, yeah... i mean, we have egos and feelings and shit. wtf?
Jul 02nd 2015
485
           Like, why wouldn't she consider & value his emotions/ego?
Jul 02nd 2015
497
           he is a man, he doesnt have feelings.
Jul 02nd 2015
502
           yup Rico had sex w/Jessica eight years ago
Jul 02nd 2015
499
           you're probably closer to right but you never know.
Jul 06th 2015
560
           it's not wrong, it's your issue and yours alone.
Jul 02nd 2015
505
                no. its their issue now.
Jul 02nd 2015
515
      if you know you don't throw the dick well
Jul 02nd 2015
478
R-tistic, I'ma start calling you Tyler Perry
Jul 02nd 2015
472
Tyler Petty
Jul 02nd 2015
477
The language in here is so tellling
Jul 02nd 2015
482
EVERYONE KNEW BUT DERON
Jul 02nd 2015
484
but sitting across from a dude that used to stick someone you love
Jul 02nd 2015
490
that po baby!
Jul 02nd 2015
491
      Wait til he finds out what she did at Mardi Gras
Jul 02nd 2015
492
      well, if it wasnt intimate it doesnt count.
Jul 02nd 2015
495
           True
Jul 03rd 2015
545
      Wait til he finds out what she did at Mardi Gras
Jul 02nd 2015
493
           if she were keeping it quiet he never would have met Rico.
Jul 02nd 2015
508
                no. women can have friends who they had casual sex with..
Jul 02nd 2015
517
                So she should have to relive a forgettable experience
Jul 02nd 2015
521
                     Well, reliving it is part of the risk when you keep Rico and his friends...
Jul 02nd 2015
524
                          Clearly you think she's ashamed of it.
Jul 02nd 2015
534
                               Her new man/fiancee would be left in the dark about Rico, too
Jul 02nd 2015
535
                               She certainly isnt proud of it... lol
Jul 02nd 2015
536
                Truth is only she and Rico know how forgettable or not it was
Jul 03rd 2015
544
pretty sure Deron knew she wasnt a virgin
Jul 02nd 2015
487
RE: The language in here is so tellling
Jul 02nd 2015
496
Oh yeah loyalty..too many gangster movies
Jul 02nd 2015
503
      HELLO.
Jul 02nd 2015
507
      RE: HELLO.
Jul 02nd 2015
511
           uh huh.
Jul 02nd 2015
516
      RE: Oh yeah loyalty..too many gangster movies
Jul 02nd 2015
509
           GENDER WARZ *clang clang*
Jul 02nd 2015
512
                RE: GENDER WARZ *clang clang*
Jul 02nd 2015
514
                and Rico's dick might be more pleasing to her than Deron's!!
Jul 02nd 2015
518
                     RE: and Rico's dick might be more pleasing to her than Deron's!!
Jul 02nd 2015
520
Yes, it is about her lying about having sex with another dude
Jul 02nd 2015
513
I can't believe yall are still saying this.
Jul 02nd 2015
523
      ^^^^this
Jul 03rd 2015
550
'The Whole Town's Laughing at Me', Teddy P.
Jul 02nd 2015
486
Who Has The Last Laugh Now - Bloodstone
Jul 02nd 2015
501
*conviently ignores what you say to push own agenda*
Jul 02nd 2015
489
*attempts meta-witty recap of 500+ reply post*
Jul 02nd 2015
522
      =/
Jul 02nd 2015
526
"Men don't have platonic friends, just women we haven't fucked yet..."
Jul 02nd 2015
525
until told otherwise, and even then I'm like ....yeah aight
Jul 02nd 2015
527
just continue to date her, dont marry her
Jul 02nd 2015
528
Amen brother
Jul 02nd 2015
530
Watch Deron break off the engagement & she turn around and marry Rico
Jul 02nd 2015
531
      ^all signs point to...
Jul 03rd 2015
546
      if he's letting go, he aint worried about who she ends up with
Jul 03rd 2015
548
he should find an old fuck buddy--
Jul 02nd 2015
532
      That would be petty and immature
Jul 02nd 2015
537
           LOL--
Jul 02nd 2015
541
So my man is supposedly besties with one of his exe girlfriends
Jul 02nd 2015
533
LOL--
Jul 02nd 2015
538
Bakin ass Brittney
Jul 02nd 2015
540
Wife is supposed to be happy he has a friend who is thoughtful
Jul 02nd 2015
539
Mine you the ex is married as well. That husband would be wrong...
Jul 02nd 2015
542
      yea thats extra
Jul 02nd 2015
543
           Doing way too much
Jul 03rd 2015
549
Ex sending cakez n shit?....NAW SUN! Log dat unda "WishA'MuhfukkaWOULD"...
Jul 03rd 2015
551
gotta fuck that hoe up.
Jul 04th 2015
554
What happened to the secure folks in a relationship?
Jul 03rd 2015
552
Teling him about fuck buddy #14 isn't the same as telling him
Jul 05th 2015
556
too many people are stuck on agendas to see this fairly
Jul 06th 2015
558
Jessica is wrong for hiding the truth, not for sexing Rico
Jul 06th 2015
561
This only bothers men with small egos
Jul 07th 2015
562

bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:20 PM

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1. "cant trust her--"
In response to Reply # 0


          

move on

if she had been up front from the jump then the relationship could have been salvaged

but honestly thats a cancellable offense

  

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placee_22
Member since Sep 30th 2002
12952 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:20 PM

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2. "In the words of the great negro philosopher Staciford Adams..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

A...QUIT...TAL

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
40936 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:44 PM

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181. "lmao"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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JellyBean
Charter member
16874 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:21 PM

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3. "Teal"
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 12:23 PM by JellyBean

  

          

the fact that he(deron) even knows dude(rico) goes to show how much it doesn't matter to her/him.


Now she probably should have told Deron but eh...it ain't that serious! He's still cool with dude...if I were him I'd just be like "so you used to smash them cakes too, huh? they're great aren't they? just remember it's my cakes now!"




sidebar: I don't like that her name is Jessica

"Holier than thou never sits well with me."(c)janey

"OKP spends way too much time looking for ways to be offended." ~legsdiamond


http://twitter.com/jeleighbean

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:26 PM

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11. "and if a man did that to you?--"
In response to Reply # 3


          

yeah, right

  

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JellyBean
Charter member
16874 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:45 PM

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57. "I'm one of those people"
In response to Reply # 11


  

          

who knows that folks have a past...and any man who can handle my past I can damn sure deal with some ish that happened 8 years BEFORE I got into the picture. *shrugs*

"Holier than thou never sits well with me."(c)janey

"OKP spends way too much time looking for ways to be offended." ~legsdiamond


http://twitter.com/jeleighbean

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:51 PM

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77. "and you'd be friends with her?--"
In response to Reply # 57


          

have her at the wedding?

  

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JellyBean
Charter member
16874 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:24 PM

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138. "I might even braid her hair!"
In response to Reply # 77


  

          

it's just not that serious to me...now if he was still smashing? that would not work at all. but something that happened 8 years ago? whatever!

"Holier than thou never sits well with me."(c)janey

"OKP spends way too much time looking for ways to be offended." ~legsdiamond


http://twitter.com/jeleighbean

  

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Atillah Moor
Member since Sep 05th 2013
13825 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 03:13 PM

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282. "^ sounds like someone has better cards to begin with"
In response to Reply # 138


  

          

______________________________________

Everything looks like Oprah kissing Harvey Weinstein these days

  

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poetx
Charter member
58091 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:21 PM

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4. "voted yellow. prolly shoulda been (teal? no votes yet for ol "
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

girl).

some time in between 'we kicking it' and, 'i really like this dude and i would consider being wifed up', she shoulda been like, 'you know what? me an rico suave had a lil thing back in the past. its way over now, nothing came of it.'

then deron could have had time to process it.

for rico, the situation is awkward. if ol' girl ain't tell, that'd be kinda messed up coming from him.

of course, this okp. somebody on here will say that rico could have hit last thursday and its still nobody's business.

*shrug*


peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

  

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placee_22
Member since Sep 30th 2002
12952 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:31 PM

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24. "you're right"
In response to Reply # 4


  

          

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:45 PM

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60. "exactly it"
In response to Reply # 4


  

          

i've unfortunately had to tell my wife a bout a few folks that are still on the periphery

it's awkward but u don't want that shit coming out like a big secret

initially my wife was meh about it but by the time we got married she sent em invites...

full disclosure about that shit has always been my policy to avoid future messiness

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
40936 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:46 PM

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186. "i agree with this "
In response to Reply # 4


  

          

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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Niq96st
Member since Jun 16th 2005
8396 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:22 PM

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5. "Wait, so is Jessica lying?"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

You say:

>Somehow, word got to Deron that Rico and Jessica used to be
>friends with benefits back in college, which is 8 years ago at
>this point. He doesn't get much detail, but hears that they
>were never a couple, just that they had sex a few times.

Then say:
She completely downplays it, basically saying "that
>was so long ago, and we were just friends then, it wasn't even
>intimate."



_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
51977 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:27 PM

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16. "Well she is admitting that the sex did happen. He can't really say"
In response to Reply # 5


  

          

how deep it was, though.

Like, was it two drunk friendly hookups? Or, were they fucking every day, sober, for 7-8 months, with deep passionate mouth kissing, gifts, and out of town trips? Did one of them want to be with the other? Were they almost an item?

She's basically saying it was never deep, and he believes that this could be the case since it's never been awkward or any "hate" coming from Rico. But because they both kept it from him, regardless, he doesn't know what to believe about it all.

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

Twitter and Instagram - @DJ_RTistic

  

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Atillah Moor
Member since Sep 05th 2013
13825 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 05:29 PM

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345. "Gotta multiply that by two at least. So maybe kinda deep."
In response to Reply # 16
Wed Jul-01-15 05:29 PM by Atillah Moor

  

          

All puns intended of course. People always try to downplay shit.

______________________________________

Everything looks like Oprah kissing Harvey Weinstein these days

  

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ambient1
Member since May 23rd 2007
41077 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:22 PM

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6. "So 'word on the street' is that got down...but when asked she said"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

nah...it ain't happ'n?

dude at the crossroads


idk....it all depends on how yo is built...if he can handle it then rock on wit his bride

if not....one monkey don't stop the show...plenty of fish in seas and all that jazz

=======================================
Coolin...

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
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9. "Nah, she admits to it. Just downplays it"
In response to Reply # 6


  

          

She's just basically like "it was just some friendly college shit that we all did, we weren't intimate or dating at all."

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

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SoWhat
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10. "that's not downplaying it."
In response to Reply # 9
Wed Jul-01-15 12:25 PM by SoWhat

  

          

that's what it was - they were friends w/benefits in the past. it's not a big deal.

did Deron think he was marrying a virgin?

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:28 PM

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19. "it is a big deal--"
In response to Reply # 10
Wed Jul-01-15 12:28 PM by bloocollar

          

if it wasnt, she would have told dude before she introduced him

  

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SoWhat
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20. "naw."
In response to Reply # 19


  

          

i wouldn't be bothered at all if i were Deron.

i would be bothered if she and this dude had been in a significant relationship 8 yrs ago and she didn't tell me. but even then...i'd get over my bother pretty quickly. b/c the past is the past. she has one...i have one. no big deal.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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26. "sowhat, god love ya--"
In response to Reply # 20


          

but youre gay

you dont know how manipulative chicks can be

rico was d*** in the glass

if he wasnt she would have been up front

  

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SoWhat
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39. "right. i'm gay so i know women better than you, homie."
In response to Reply # 26


  

          

b/c when i sit w/all my gal pals getting our nails done and chit-chatting about boys i hear everything they say. and later when we're all getting dolled up to go to the club and they let me see their titties and feel up on they booties but it's not a big deal b/c i'm gay i give them advice on how to deal w/boys. then the next day after the club when we go have brunch and shop for shoes we dish about what happened the day before w/their boys and then we go have more mani/pedis and gossip and spill T about boys. and so there's nothing you can tell me about them that i dunno, fool.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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55. "you know them better platonically--"
In response to Reply # 39


          

not romantically

sowhat they bleed.....every month!!! and still live!!!

  

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SoWhat
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64. "i know them intimately."
In response to Reply # 55


  

          

i touch on their titties and feel up they booties when they ask me to help squeeze them into their favorite freak'um dress b4 their date w/some boy.

fuck you.

  

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Ted Gee Seal
Member since Apr 18th 2007
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222. "^ been backstage at the puppet show; seen the strings"
In response to Reply # 64
Wed Jul-01-15 02:03 PM by Ted Gee Seal

  

          

>i touch on their titties and feel up they booties when they
>ask me to help squeeze them into their favorite freak'um dress
>b4 their date w/some boy.
>

All he sees is men playing themselves.

Just IMO though.

  

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SoWhat
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226. "lol"
In response to Reply # 222


  

          

fuck you.

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
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21. "I'll say that it's no way to know if she's downplaying it for real"
In response to Reply # 10


  

          

It sounds as if the tone she used was downplaying it, regardless of what happened.

From how he told it, she didn't panic, or say "ok, look, here's the entire story" or go into any detail. He said she admitted to it right away, saying what she said. I'm not sure if he asked about anyone else, or if he even knows other guys that she knows.

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

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SoWhat
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25. "he needs to grow up."
In response to Reply # 21


  

          

or accept that if he can't handle this he should get out now.

but she's not wrong here.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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30. "shes absolutely wrong--"
In response to Reply # 25


          

k

  

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SoWhat
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41. "i'm not at all surprised that YOU feel that way."
In response to Reply # 30


  

          

being that you have the emotional maturity of a 13 year old boy. i expect no less.

fuck you.

  

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ambient1
Member since May 23rd 2007
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:26 PM

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14. "well...nobody is 'wrong'....it's just if he can handle that or not"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          

some niggas aint built for that....self included


but alot are...


he gotta have a long talk in the mirror

=======================================
Coolin...

  

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SoWhat
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23. "agreed."
In response to Reply # 14


  

          

fuck you.

  

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Dstl1
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75. "yep..."
In response to Reply # 14


          

dude either can accept that his NOW bride was someone's late night fuck 8 years ago...or he can't. Nobody did shit wrong.

...cleaned up my act, made a few violent songs...but, they wack like Glen Rice with New Balance on - Sean Price

  

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SoWhat
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7. "SO IN THE FUCK WHAT???"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

she fucked someone else in the past. like almost a DECADE AGO.

AND?

if this stupid nigga blows up a good thing over some bullshit like this he deserves to live the rest of his life alone.

fuck him.

fuck you.

  

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PROMO
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12. "pretty much where i'm at with it. Deron wrong and insecure like a bitch."
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

STAND OUT HAND OUTS: http://basquiatwhenipaint.tumblr.com

TWEET ME: @PROMO206

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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22. "GTFO--"
In response to Reply # 12


          

so you could trust a chick like that

all her friends knowing dude used to smash

snickering at your dumb ass behind your back

stop it dude

  

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PROMO
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28. "yes i could, because i'm not insecure."
In response to Reply # 22


  

          

and it's laughable that you find it unbelievable that such people exist.

STAND OUT HAND OUTS: http://basquiatwhenipaint.tumblr.com

TWEET ME: @PROMO206

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:33 PM

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34. "LOL secure--"
In response to Reply # 28


          

ok

  

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PROMO
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36. "bruh, the He-Man Woman Haters Club meeting is THAT way."
In response to Reply # 34


  

          

STAND OUT HAND OUTS: http://basquiatwhenipaint.tumblr.com

TWEET ME: @PROMO206

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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73. "u trippin fam, i wouldn't give a shit either way"
In response to Reply # 36


  

          

but to not mention it is just sloppy...

let me know on some good faith shit...

nobody wants to hear that from outside sources...no matter how much it pre-dated me...

that's just some courteous shit, not some insecure shit...when in the room with people your other has bumped uglies with...there is potential for messiness...air it out and it'd literally be no issue

i'm secure enough to talk about the shit, hear about the shit, but keep me informed god damn...

i aint mad at dude...not his place to inform me

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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PROMO
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97. "i'm sure she didn't tell him because of this reaction."
In response to Reply # 73


  

          

now, should she have? PROBABLY if only for full disclosure purposes.

STILL, he knows now, she's confirmed it, and he's still acting immature if you ask me, especially since there is no indication of feelings or actions on either her part or this Rico dude.

he keeps going and he's gonna fuck up a good relationship AND a good friendship for something that actually doesn't matter.

STAND OUT HAND OUTS: http://basquiatwhenipaint.tumblr.com

TWEET ME: @PROMO206

  

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SoWhat
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99. "agreed."
In response to Reply # 97


  

          

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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103. "he's reacting bc she intentionally left that detail out"
In response to Reply # 97


  

          

look...if u have a friend u used to fuck and you want him to be around us both...

tell me

or

keep me away from them

u have nothing but your own biases telling you that he would have the same reaction if he had known in advance

been there...not a jealous bone in my body but hiding some shit and admitting to it is still some sketchy shit

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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189. "if its bothering him then it matters bruh"
In response to Reply # 97


          

it's cool you have no problem with it but acting like he can't be bothered or fuck up a good thing?

if you wanna be real SHE fucked up a good thing by ommitting that info and serving him up to her friends like that.

you don't get to be the last one to tell me and then tell me i need to get over it.

nah, yall are 100% wrong on this.

shut up already, damn

  

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spades
Member since Mar 22nd 2006
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111. "That's really what's bothering him, and I get it, I'd be mad too."
In response to Reply # 73


  

          

I'd also recognize, that I should be mad at WHOEVER TOLD ME SOME SHIT I REALLY AIN'T NEED TO HEAR.

Truth be told, Jessica needs to take stock of who are her friends, because that's a violation.

Dude has every right to be mad, he just needs to direct it where it needs to go.

That being said, maybe he can't handle this sitch - and if so, he should go. I know ppl who don't want their SOs to have active relationships (yes a friendship is a relationship) w/previous sex partners. Maybe he's one of these dudes, and maybe they've had this convo, if she denied it THEN she's wrong, but only then.

********************************
http://www.last.fm/user/Nspades

Get Out The Room!
http://getouttheroom.podomatic.com
@fakewilliamkatt
www.wickedradionetwork.com

"The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion" - Paulo Coehlo

  

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MiracleRic
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122. "yea, but if he's one of those people"
In response to Reply # 111


  

          

shouldn't she be telling him so he can decide? or is ignorance bliss only when no cheating is invloved?

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:48 PM

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"and what if a few weeks from now ANOTHER friend fesses up? "


          

this isn't his fault. he didn't ask to be friends friends with those dudes.

shut up already, damn

  

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spades
Member since Mar 22nd 2006
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207. "she absolutely should, assuming she knows that."
In response to Reply # 122


  

          

Pride is a mufukka

********************************
http://www.last.fm/user/Nspades

Get Out The Room!
http://getouttheroom.podomatic.com
@fakewilliamkatt
www.wickedradionetwork.com

"The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion" - Paulo Coehlo

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
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201. "^^^"
In response to Reply # 73


  

          

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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SoWhat
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31. "LOL"
In response to Reply # 22


  

          

>all her friends knowing dude used to smash
>
>snickering at your dumb ass behind your back

are she and her friends in junior high school?

wtf?

LOL

if her friends ain't got shit better to do than snicker about my girl's decade-old casual sex then i'd have no problem shading them into such darkness they'd never recover. i'm about THAT life. i'm built for THAT. no problem here.

i understand some ppl don't have the constitution for it.

fuck you.

  

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ThaAnthology
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293. "this is a really immature reply"
In response to Reply # 22


  

          

they smashed like 8 years ago. they are not intimate now and she and Deron are together. Go ahead and let this childish insecurity eff it up. She'll smash Rico because of your nonsense lol.

www.anthologyfmn.com

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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63. "smh... nah, Deron sounds like a normal dude"
In response to Reply # 12
Wed Jul-01-15 12:49 PM by legsdiamond

          

the fact that SHE didn't speak on it and let the streets tell him shows she felt some type away about being upfront from the jump.

you don't introduce your fiance to an old butt buddy and let them chill at the house.


any dude who would shrug it off without a "WTF, we gotta talk about this" is a lame ass person.

can't have secrets like that and keep that person that close to a new relationship. FOH

shut up already, damn

  

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Latina212
Member since Apr 28th 2003
8659 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:37 PM

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42. "I'm in this line."
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
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44. "pretty much"
In response to Reply # 7


  

          


~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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67. "6 years is not almost a decade ago"
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

and that's something u typically want to know before meeting someone like that...

especially since they are still close friends with you

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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71. "8 years is almost a decade."
In response to Reply # 67


  

          

and even 6 years is long enough ago that Deron is being silly and needs to get over himself. quickly. and if he can't he should just break up w/her.

but she's not wrong.

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:53 PM

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84. "she's not THAT wrong"
In response to Reply # 71


  

          

i'm not sweating that my partner had sex...no shit it happens but some people would prefer not to interact with those people or at least be informed...

i'm the latter

i would stay and i wouldn't even be particularly upset...but i'd definitely be like..."no heads up?"

i just like to be informed bc when uninformed, it invites a lot of parties to come in and kee-kee on some shit i'm not even aware of...

it's a consideration issue

when someone comes to me about it being messy...i'm prepared...that's it

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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89. "if someone comes to me about this they get shut down."
In response to Reply # 84


  

          

but ppl who know me know better than to bring this sort of silliness to my door. i don't stand for it.

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:06 PM

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107. "good for you"
In response to Reply # 89


  

          

but like my nigga Scar i like to "BE PREPARED!"

so that i can shut it down with minimal messiness

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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117. "i shut it down and then me and the s.o. would laugh about it."
In response to Reply # 107


  

          

i had a friend come to me talking about one of our other friends i'd smashed and he'd 'heard' about it. my response was 'surely w/all of the goings-on in the world y'all could've found something else to talk about. and i'm not about to talk about this w/you now.' and i never heard about that shit again.

i don't do gossip - especially not about my sex life. and if ppl are out there dishing about who i'm banging that says more about THEM than it does about me. if they're that bored that they have nothing better to do than concern themselves w/who I'M knocking down then i pity them. and i don't worry about it at all.

fuck you.

  

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spades
Member since Mar 22nd 2006
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115. "and really that's the REAL problem."
In response to Reply # 89


  

          

Jessica needs to check her friends.

********************************
http://www.last.fm/user/Nspades

Get Out The Room!
http://getouttheroom.podomatic.com
@fakewilliamkatt
www.wickedradionetwork.com

"The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion" - Paulo Coehlo

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:12 PM

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120. "lol, yes, bc that works in real life"
In response to Reply # 115


  

          

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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spades
Member since Mar 22nd 2006
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:57 PM

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209. "yes it does."
In response to Reply # 120


  

          

you ditch the ones that ain't about you, you keep the ones who knows what's up. I can't imagine any of MY friends doing me like that. Admittedly, I have few - but maybe that's why.

********************************
http://www.last.fm/user/Nspades

Get Out The Room!
http://getouttheroom.podomatic.com
@fakewilliamkatt
www.wickedradionetwork.com

"The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion" - Paulo Coehlo

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:12 PM

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121. "yup."
In response to Reply # 115


  

          

fuck you.

  

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MEAT
Member since Feb 08th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:49 PM

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72. "I like to know the history of folks in my house and my face "
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

Let me have the knowledge of what's going on around and in my life and I'll do the same.

8 years is way in the past. It's not the sex that's relevant to me, it's the openness of what we have.

That said, I'm not in that mans house or relationship and what works for me doesn't necessarily work for everyone else.

-------
“There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn.” -Albert Camus

  

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SoWhat
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92. "that ain't me. "
In response to Reply # 72


  

          

my history is so long i couldn't recount it for my partners and i don't expect them to do that for me.

there are men in the world who i've boned who i don't remember. oh well. LOL

fuck you.

  

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MEAT
Member since Feb 08th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:20 PM

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128. "Which is understandable, just let me know if they're in my house"
In response to Reply # 92
Wed Jul-01-15 01:20 PM by MEAT

  

          

We run into dude at the grocery store, eh, I'm not too concerned.

However, if dude is someone I drink with, trust not to be an ass, bring around my friends; I want to know some things about them.

And that's more where I am.

I keep a very small circle of people I hang out with, I entrust a lot to them and they to me and I need to trust the person that I'm gonna marry. Her not telling me isn't a sign of mistrust, it's just a level of communication that I'd have expected. But who knows aside from those two in that situation what their communication level is.

-------
“There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn.” -Albert Camus

  

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SoWhat
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135. "sure."
In response to Reply # 128


  

          

fuck you.

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:52 PM

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196. "Why fuck him tho? He was the one deceived via omission "
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

The impression was given that they were just homies from college.

Now I'm legit friends with ppl I've slept with in the distance pass but if they gonna be all up in my world kicking it with my current SO and befriending my current SO Ima let the SO know what the deal was. Not exactly becuz I feel like I owe him to disclose all my past but moreso to protect him from hurt and embarrassment

I would feel hurt and deceived if this happened to me. May not dead it but Rico would be put at a far distance. In fact I wouldn't fool with him at all

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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SoWhat
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211. "b/c i said so. "
In response to Reply # 196


  

          

fuck you.

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
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316. "smh "
In response to Reply # 211


  

          

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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SoWhat
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323. "i'm sorry you got here late."
In response to Reply # 316


  

          

read the replies - surely the info you seek is somewhere in the post.

fuck you.

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
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Thu Jul-02-15 04:23 AM

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424. "what info am i seeking? I'm shaking my head at how much of a cunt ur"
In response to Reply # 323
Thu Jul-02-15 04:23 AM by blkprinceMD05

  

          

Being. That's self explanatory. I may have "cared" initially why u were coming down on him but then I realized ur just doing what u often do in the last few years and I judged and kept it moving. Thanks

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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SoWhat
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434. "blah blah blah."
In response to Reply # 424


  

          

so deep in so many feelings.

you'll be fine. shake it off and keep moving, player. it's alright.

fuck you.

  

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TheAlbionist
Member since Jul 04th 2011
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Thu Jul-02-15 03:17 AM

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422. "This. This. THIS."
In response to Reply # 7
Thu Jul-02-15 03:18 AM by TheAlbionist

  

          

What's so wrong with dude's ego that the realisation that this girl has a sexual past upsets him so much?

He might need a hug and a little cry about what he's doing with his life, but she shouldn't be bullied into letting her (entirely acceptable) past fuck up her future.

She might want to think about finding a real man to marry.

_______________________________

))<>((
forever.

  

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gumz
Member since Jan 09th 2005
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Thu Jul-02-15 10:10 AM

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442. "I agree...he needs to take a big shot of whiskey and man up..."
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

I get needing a moment to get over the initial shock but take a deep breath and charge it to the game. She's gonna be your wife. Trust her or end it. If she still wanted dude she wouldn't be marrying you.

http://www.youtube.com/user/gumzization
twitter: @BrosefMalone

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:24 PM

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8. "RE: Guy finds out his fiancee's homeboy used to sex her down in college"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I just had a similar convo with a friend about something like this. People's meaning in your life can evolve. As long as the sex with Rico is firmly in the past (AKA before Jessica was legitimately with Deron), Deron needs to get over it. He probably still keeps in touch with women he's smanged, and even if he doesn't, he needs to grow up.

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:26 PM

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"agreed - Deron needs to grow up."


  

          

as do any of the ppl in his or his fiancee's life who are talking about this shit. as if it matters. b/c it doesn't.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:36 PM

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38. "and if a man did that to you--"
In response to Reply # 8


          

"aw girl, she aint mean nothin. we just smashed like three times a few years ago. you girls should be friends!"

stoppit

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:40 PM

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51. "If she was cool?"
In response to Reply # 38


  

          

Who cares? He's mine now. She may have had him once, but I got him all the time. Insecurity is so toxic.

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:55 PM

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87. "this isn't just insecurity though"
In response to Reply # 51


  

          

that's some gaslighting tactician shit

nobody wants to be caught out there...if you gonna introduce me to someone u bumped uglies with and the relationships...give me the same history lesson u would with any other friend...

it's a convenient little fact that's left out and it just invites shadiness and messiness

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:01 PM

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98. "exactly... i did this shit back in the day and ole girl was mad as shit"
In response to Reply # 87


          

she didn't leave me but she was definitely on some "you can't have me out there like that"

and she was right. I was being messy, manipulative and selfish.

shut up already, damn

  

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Boogie Stimuli
Member since Sep 24th 2010
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:39 PM

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175. "I'm sayin. Don't think I've ever MET the woman who wouldn't"
In response to Reply # 98


          

wanna know if I used to have sex with my female friends, lol.
Not saying they don't exist, but people acting like this is just so super far-fetched is some agenda posting shit.

~
~
~
~
~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtNhsGgEk54
Everything's turning out perfectly

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:02 PM

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101. "bull and--"
In response to Reply # 51


          

shit

first major argument yall have......

ya know what, if it happens make sure you post abt it. thats all i ask

  

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Buddy_Gilapagos
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13. "One of the greatest things that would go through me was the idea that"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Had this thing between them that I didn't know about. Like they were keeping this secret from me.

I think I could be friends easily with my SOs old flame. But I'd have a hard time finding out like that they had something going back in the day.

The being kept in the dark part would drive me a little nutty.

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson


"One of the most important things in life is what Judge Learned Hand described as 'that ever-gnawing inner doubt as to whether you're

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:28 PM

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18. "doesn't sound like an old flame situation."
In response to Reply # 13


  

          

sounds like they casually fucked a couple or a few times almost a decade ago.

if i learned this about my betrothed and his friend i'd shrug my shoulders and give the homie some dap. and then we'd all move on.

this is not anything worth worrying about.

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:07 PM

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108. "i would too...especially if previously informed"
In response to Reply # 18


  

          

if i wasn't...i'd be curious to know why i wasn't since it would have been apparent that it would come out

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:14 PM

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123. "'apparent that it would come out'"
In response to Reply # 108


  

          

WHY WOULD IT? LOL

that's what i'm saying.

i can't stand ppl who are this messy. my ppl know this and don't bring me this kind of mess. b/c i don't entertain it.

and i wouldn't be w/someone who would entertain it.

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:20 PM

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130. "then u can't stand a ton of people"
In response to Reply # 123


  

          

and neither can i

if you have a circle of friends...

all of which know that you and someone used to be banging...and uninformed as to when exactly that arrangement ends...

it's gonna be at least 1 messy individual looking to be messy

or

1 concerned citizen ass individual

or the nigga might even dry-snitch on his damn self while tailgating or some shit...

i've literally seen all 3

u know how weird and awkward that is...no matter how fucking well u shut it down?

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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137. "nope."
In response to Reply # 130


  

          

this hasn't happened in 38 yrs. i know it happens to other ppl - not to me.

*shrug*

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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141. "oh, sorry i mistook you for Deron"
In response to Reply # 137


  

          

lol

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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145. "you did. lol"
In response to Reply # 141


  

          

fuck you.

  

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Ashy Achilles
Member since Sep 22nd 2005
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:27 PM

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15. "nobody is wrong"
In response to Reply # 0


          

  

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flipnile
Member since Nov 05th 2003
12511 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:27 PM

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17. "A dude I know married this girl I used to mess with..."
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 12:28 PM by flipnile

          

Kinda similar to DJ-R's scenario. He met her because I introduced them. Doesn't know we used to mess with each other, and the main difference is that I fell way back once they started dating.

It would be wrong as fuck if I was still hanging with the jawn, and friends with dude without disclosure about our former relationship. I mean, that's dude's WIFE. Shady as hell on the jawn and the former fb.

but yeah, this is #Grounds.

  

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ndibs
Member since Aug 06th 2012
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Mon Jul-06-15 12:41 AM

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557. " I cant understand why she'd want to be friends "
In response to Reply # 17


          

>It would be wrong as fuck if I was still hanging with the
>jawn, and friends with dude without disclosure about our
>former relationship. I mean, that's dude's WIFE. Shady as hell
>on the jawn and the former fb.

If you weren't emotionally involved and it wasn't serious why are you still buddy buddy 10 years after. So clearly they are emotionally involved because it's so easy to find other ppl to kick it with on a casual friendship level and that could have prevented this from becoming an issue.

  

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Grand_Royal
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:31 PM

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27. "None of this is a big deal, but one thing bothers me"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

...there should be a sixth choice, so that the "I'm White" option is always purple #chartermemberproblems

  

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JellyBean
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70. "it should have been"
In response to Reply # 27


  

          

It's just sex

THEN

I'm white

everybody knows you leave the last option open for 'I'm white' lol

"Holier than thou never sits well with me."(c)janey

"OKP spends way too much time looking for ways to be offended." ~legsdiamond


http://twitter.com/jeleighbean

  

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Grand_Royal
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78. "Exactly! lol"
In response to Reply # 70


  

          

  

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dba_BAD
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:32 PM

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29. "the only thing 'wrong' is that jess didn't mention it up front"
In response to Reply # 0


          

but other than that i'm team sowhat

__

fairweather

  

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no_i_cant_dance
Member since Apr 10th 2006
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:33 PM

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32. "Similar sitch happened in my friend circle & friendships imploded."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

A heads up, so 'you don't hear it out in the streets' is probably how I would've played it.

I mean, I didn't tell my fiancé about my past sexual partners but he wasn't exactly friends w/ or encountering my past sexual partners either.

Men are the messiest of humans tho so there is an impulse to divulge to 'get ahead of the story/control the narrative' or w/e.

Happiness & good luck to all involved lol.

<<Mood...Poppy Okotcha in Look 1 at Ashish Fall 2016
________________________________________

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sa7KBq0q5bU

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:56 PM

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88. "exactly...it's a social consideration lol"
In response to Reply # 32


  

          

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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Government Name
Member since Dec 16th 2005
23189 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:33 PM

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33. "nobody's wrong. that's just their issue to work out. "
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

________
http://twitter.com/aehorton
http://instagram.com/aehorton

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
30211 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:34 PM

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35. "All y'all sayin Jessica's wrong..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Are you also saying you have to disclose to someone you're dating anyone you still keep in contact with that you were more than just friends with? At which point are you supposed to have that conversation?

I just assume after a certain age, adults have had sex lives and romantic history before they met me. If your partner isn't a complete degenerate, it would make sense they still keep in touch with or are even friends with at least one of them.

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:39 PM

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45. "RE: All y'all sayin Jessica's wrong..."
In response to Reply # 35


          

>Are you also saying you have to disclose to someone you're
>dating anyone you still keep in contact with that you were
>more than just friends with? At which point are you supposed
>to have that conversation?

you dont have to disclose to someone youre dating. you DO have to disclose to your fiancee

>I just assume after a certain age, adults have had sex lives
>and romantic history before they met me. If your partner isn't
>a complete degenerate, it would make sense they still keep in
>touch with or are even friends with at least one of them.

and you should be aware of who it is

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:45 PM

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59. "So you're saying you've told your wife about everyone you smanged?"
In response to Reply # 45


  

          

Like immediately after you put a ring on it? I'm just wondering how you think Jessica should've played this situation...

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:59 PM

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93. "no because she doesnt know any of them--"
In response to Reply # 59


          

if they were in my life then i would tell her before she even met her

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:36 PM

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172. "But how can you be certain?"
In response to Reply # 93


  

          

This world is small. She could casually know some chick you were with years ago, but due to your lack of disclosure, she hasn't connected those dots. I just wonder when and who you're supposed to disclose. People come in and out of our lives all the time. Shit intersects in crazy ways sometimes.

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:52 PM

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198. "that is completely different than introducing her as a friend"
In response to Reply # 172


          

and letting your SO get cool with them.

I take my wife home and make sure I tell her about old flames I'm still cool with.

we all have a history and I had sex with people before I knew my wife existed and vice versa.

but to let them get cool and someone else tell them? nah... that's messy.

shut up already, damn

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:41 PM

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52. "I really just think it sucks for everyone in this case. Timing wise,"
In response to Reply # 35


  

          

it's hard to say exactly when Jessica should have said something. If she says it before he met Rico, he may always look at Rico sideways, if he's that type...or he just may not trust his intentions. If he meets him, and she tells him a few days/weeks later, he still might feel weird to him.

He did tell me that he wouldn't have been as mad if she had told him at any point first, but he hated that someone else had to break it to him. I'm not even sure how he found out, but it didn't sound like someone was blatantly snitching or "looking out," more so they didn't realize what his situation was.

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

Twitter and Instagram - @DJ_RTistic

  

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Marbles
Member since Oct 19th 2004
21491 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:34 PM

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167. "It's kinda suspect that other folks put her out like that..."
In response to Reply # 52


  

          


>He did tell me that he wouldn't have been as mad if she had
>told him at any point first, but he hated that someone else
>had to break it to him. I'm not even sure how he found out,
>but it didn't sound like someone was blatantly snitching or
>"looking out," more so they didn't realize what his situation
>was.

Especially if they knew Deron was her fiance. Why are they talking about who she used to smash 8 years ago anyways?

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:49 PM

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192. "Basically. "
In response to Reply # 167


  

          

The whole situation is odd.

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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spades
Member since Mar 22nd 2006
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Wed Jul-01-15 03:29 PM

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290. "Not even KINDA. It's REALLY fucked up."
In response to Reply # 167


  

          

which is why I said, she need to take a look at her circle. That was a CLEAR violation.

********************************
http://www.last.fm/user/Nspades

Get Out The Room!
http://getouttheroom.podomatic.com
@fakewilliamkatt
www.wickedradionetwork.com

"The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion" - Paulo Coehlo

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 03:49 PM

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297. "HELLO."
In response to Reply # 167


  

          

why is that even a topic of conversation?

that would have to be dealt with.

i'm not w/the ppl in here who seem to just accept that this kind of mess is a part of life. it doesn't have to be. it's not part of mine, at least.

i don't run w/messy ppl and i don't stand for this kind of mess to be introduced in my life or my romantic relationships. and i can't see myself marrying a guy who doesn't feel similarly about this issue. which is why i can't see us having this problem - i think my dude would've shut this shit down as i would've.

fuck you.

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
40936 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 04:35 PM

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315. "the op says the parties that spilled the tea DIDNT kno deron and Jess "
In response to Reply # 167


  

          

Were together.

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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Triptych
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329. "^^^ lawyers & engineers in here parsing iut premises"
In response to Reply # 315


  

          

lol.

____________________________

http://twitter.com/irefox
http://stackoverflow.com/users/43089/triptych
http://github.com/djtriptych

  

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SoWhat
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336. "'SOMEHOW word got to Deron...' (Emphasis added)"
In response to Reply # 315


  

          

It doesn't tell us who told or what they knew. It does say D spent time with R's friends - some of whom didn't know about D & J.

fuck you.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 04:37 PM

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317. "this is why she needed to tell him"
In response to Reply # 167


          

everyone acting like Rico is a cool but more than likely he some told all his boys how he hit it first.

not sure why y'all act like people aren't going to act like real live people.

where are these magical above it all negroes who don't get a little messy once they get a drink or 2?

and real talk, dude who told him may be a hater but he may also be a dude who wouldn't want the same shit to happen to him.

he deserved to know... this is all her fault.

shut up already, damn

  

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Geez 216
Member since Jul 02nd 2003
1102 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 04:58 PM

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330. "Cause it's clearly not as simple as everyone wants to make it out to be"
In response to Reply # 167


  

          


>
> Especially if they knew Deron was her fiance. Why are they
>talking about who she used to smash 8 years ago anyways?


Shit, who even makes their fuck buddy into their bestie, or a good friend that they used to fool around with that became they best friend? Shit don't happen like that, you can bet Rico and Jessica had on of those 'if we don't marry anyone else by 35, then we'll commit to each other' type deals if they were really that tight years after they messed around with each other...

  

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SoWhat
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339. "I've been friends with a guy I banged in college."
In response to Reply # 330


  

          

We were cool for at least 10 yrs after college. I have no interest in having sex with him again bc I didn't really enjoy the sex. I did it bc I wanted the experience (he was one of my firsts) and the more we did it the less I liked it. And a relationship with him wasn't interesting bc we weren't compatible as we wanted different things in a mate. These days we are friends on FB but that's about it. But we stayed in touch more often for about 10 years until he left town.

fuck you.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:58 PM

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91. "if that person is still a friend and in our circle of friends...hell yea..."
In response to Reply # 35


          

not sure why you guys are acting like this isn't a bit deal. it isnt a deal breaker but it's definitely a WTF moment.

Your dude introduces you to a female friend and you become cool with all her friends and then one tells you that old girl used to fuck your man back in college and you just shrug and keke with the group?

FOH.

y'all lying. okp's get mad at good moring text but this shit is cool?

lol...too funny

shut up already, damn

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:02 PM

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100. "why not?"
In response to Reply # 35


  

          

>Are you also saying you have to disclose to someone you're
>dating anyone you still keep in contact with that you were
>more than just friends with? At which point are you supposed
>to have that conversation?
>

whenever you are comfortable...but preferably before i'm fully introduced to the person...

u don't have to disclose all your partners but it's definitely a good look that i'm not left in the dark around a group of guys who have seen the goods...that aspect of it is social lol...i'd rather be informed and secure than ignorant and secure

>I just assume after a certain age, adults have had sex lives
>and romantic history before they met me. If your partner isn't
>a complete degenerate, it would make sense they still keep in
>touch with or are even friends with at least one of them.

what does that have to do with being open in the name of trust...i don't care how old you are...nobody wants to go blindly into that situation bc even secure people get jealous or distrustful...

here's my thing...if you have a good friend u want to introduce me to...chances are you've told me many a story about this person...to the point that when i meet them..."i've heard so much about you" is a common saying...

so if you leave THAT part out it seems intentional and sneaky...avoid that and avoid the social awkwardness that could arise from me learning from someone else...both of those are possibilities whether i'm secure or not

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
30211 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:11 PM

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116. "Personally I'm a big proponent of transparency."
In response to Reply # 100
Wed Jul-01-15 01:12 PM by ChiBrownSkinLady

  

          

I even told my now deceased boyfriend about all my significant relationships and the insignificant ones with guys who are still significant to me now.

But I also know not everyone is built for the whole truth despite how much they may claim otherwise. Personally I don't want a man I can't be transparent with, it helps me weed out the ones I'm incompatible with. But I can understand where Jessica is coming from...

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:25 PM

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140. "then she could at least not minimize his concerns"
In response to Reply # 116


  

          

i get it...

u didn't want to go into it...explain why

but rather than "what's the big deal?" aka right out the distrustful person handbook quotes...

how about a simple "my bad, it's ancient history and I didn't think it would be revisited"

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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ChiBrownSkinLady
Member since Nov 14th 2002
30211 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:30 PM

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155. "I agree with you."
In response to Reply # 140


  

          

But we're also getting this story third-hand. It's altogether possible she communicated that exactly to him, but the retelling has skewed the actual quotes.

__________________________

Just tryna do the best that I can with what it is I have...

  

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blackrussian
Member since Oct 17th 2010
6498 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:34 PM

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37. "no-one is really wrong...but i wouldn't like it"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

then again, i don't believe in being friends with exes.

  

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Bruce Belafonte
Member since Jan 14th 2008
31999 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:36 PM

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40. "he stay trolling"
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 12:37 PM by Bruce Belafonte

  

          

ugh.

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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SoWhat
Charter member
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:38 PM

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43. "<-- has been in a stable male/female relationship."
In response to Reply # 40


  

          

fuck you.

  

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Bruce Belafonte
Member since Jan 14th 2008
31999 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:40 PM

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48. "sure you have buddy."
In response to Reply # 43


  

          

lol

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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SoWhat
Charter member
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:41 PM

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53. "right. i sure have."
In response to Reply # 48


  

          

fuck you.

  

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Bruce Belafonte
Member since Jan 14th 2008
31999 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:04 PM

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102. "k."
In response to Reply # 53


  

          

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:08 PM

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110. "2 years, buddy."
In response to Reply # 102


  

          

well, on and strong for 2 yrs and then a while after that we were off and on - it was complicated. we're still friends on Facebook. she brought her baby to my high school graduation and the whole family swore he was mine. LOL. but i digress.

it's fairly common for gay men and women to have been involved in heterosexual relationships at some point - usually when we're young.

surely you've heard of this?

hell, millions of us even have kids born out of these ^ relationships. you ain't know?

fuck you.

  

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Bruce Belafonte
Member since Jan 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:39 PM

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176. "yeah if the last time you had a woman was highschool..."
In response to Reply # 110


  

          

you ain't never had a woman.


have one as an adult and you'll know what i mean as opposed to arguing what you don't know.

you're pretty much opto trying to comment on relationships. yall have the same level of expertise aka none.

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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SoWhat
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185. "great."
In response to Reply # 176
Wed Jul-01-15 01:45 PM by SoWhat

  

          

and yet, here i am. and there ain't shit you can do about it but cry, fam.

have fun w/that.

fuck you.

  

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Bruce Belafonte
Member since Jan 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:54 PM

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202. "why would i cry over someone being delusional?"
In response to Reply # 185


  

          

lolololol


yes, you're here. trolls are a dime a dozen on the internet. you're not special. and... the only one that would cry would be the one that values your opinion.

but feel empowered by your ability to speak nonsense.

imagine me crying about it if you like. imagine you have some credibility in this conversation. imagine yourself to be something other than a troll.

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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SoWhat
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213. "only you can answer that."
In response to Reply # 202


  

          

but you keep trying this same tactic and it gets you no where.

best of luck.

fuck you.

  

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Bruce Belafonte
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227. "irony:"
In response to Reply # 213
Wed Jul-01-15 02:06 PM by Bruce Belafonte

  

          

>but you keep trying this same tactic and it gets you no
>where.

samsies:

>
>best of luck.

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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Boogie Stimuli
Member since Sep 24th 2010
12497 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:03 PM

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223. "LMFAOOO"
In response to Reply # 176


          

>yeah if the last time you had a woman was highschool...
>you ain't never had a woman.
>



~
~
~
~
~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtNhsGgEk54
Everything's turning out perfectly

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:53 PM

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83. "and it turned ya gay!!!--"
In response to Reply # 43


          

hiyyooooooo

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:55 PM

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205. "lmao"
In response to Reply # 83


          

shut up already, damn

  

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Boogie Stimuli
Member since Sep 24th 2010
12497 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:22 PM

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240. "It's always funny to me that certain women always agree w/ him..."
In response to Reply # 40


          

on these kinds of issues.

Unless you have some crazy plan on being intimate with a gay guy...


~
~
~
~
~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtNhsGgEk54
Everything's turning out perfectly

  

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Bruce Belafonte
Member since Jan 14th 2008
31999 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:33 PM

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256. "the blind leading the blind. i don't think they realize the harm"
In response to Reply # 240


  

          

they're doing by giving/receiving bad advice. if i didn't feel like someone else was being misled i wouldn't even acknowledge that shit.

http://youtu.be/5o37GORoKUQ

#htpw

  

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Boogie Stimuli
Member since Sep 24th 2010
12497 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:52 PM

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268. "Say word, family."
In response to Reply # 256


          

>they're doing by giving/receiving bad advice. if i didn't
>feel like someone else was being misled i wouldn't even
>acknowledge that shit.

~
~
~
~
~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtNhsGgEk54
Everything's turning out perfectly

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
40936 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 09:12 PM

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393. "oh stfu with ur strange ass"
In response to Reply # 256


  

          

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 06:19 PM

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366. "they always super single too"
In response to Reply # 240


          

his advice is only for the lonely...

shit is sad

shut up already, damn

  

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2.tears.in.a.bucket
Member since Sep 04th 2009
6185 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:28 PM

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251. "any1 in her circle that told her fiancee wrong. u take that 2 the grave."
In response to Reply # 40


  

          

♚♚♚♚

#BYLUG >>> https://goo.gl/1ooFp6

♚♚♚♚

screamin' mothafuck a 12 /
bitches ain't shit /
cops ain't neither /
they huntin' my people /

- i. rashad

♚♚♚♚

  

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vee-lover
Member since Jul 30th 2007
20388 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:39 PM

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46. "Maybe it's being shallow but I'd have to call off the engagement "
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

because I couldn't and she more than likely wouldn't end her friendship w/him...and I don't think I could ever be totally comfortable w/him being around us after knowing this..

And secondly, if the situation were reversed, there's no f'ing way your soon-to-be-wife is going to be cool w/you having a "friendship" w/a chick you used to have a sexual liason with...I don't care how long ago or how casual you say it was

So what's fair for her should be fair for the both of us

grassrootsphilosopher

  

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SoWhat
Charter member
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47. "shit, i'm friends right now w/3 male couples"
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 12:42 PM by SoWhat

  

          

where i've smanged at least one of the dudes in the couple. it has never come up in conversation. i have no idea if the significant others are aware and i couldn't care less.

i can't imagine us needing to talk about that shit. for what? unless we're maybe gonna bone again. and this one time w/one of the couples i thought we were...but alas it didn't go down. oh well.

fuck you.

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
51977 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:45 PM

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"Do gay couples tend to operate different about these things?"


  

          

I've always wondered, because I know a few gay guys, and see how their circles move, and it doesn't seem as different as I'd imagine, in comparison to male-female relationships.

As Vee-Lover said...I know for sure that a LOT of women would have an issue if they found out that their fiancee's "close homegirl" was a former lover/FWB. Hell, even just dating women, many of them see the girls around me, and ask questions, get suspicious, etc etc. Even worse when they sense another girl likes me, when I tell them they're just a friend (c) Biz

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

Twitter and Instagram - @DJ_RTistic

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:47 PM

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66. "there are definitely some gay dudes who are as stupid as Deron."
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 12:47 PM by SoWhat

  

          

i have a couple of friends who'd definitely feel some kinda way if they were in this situation. and i'd ridicule the shit out of them just like i'd ridicule Deron.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:46 PM

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62. "but its different tho fam--"
In response to Reply # 47


          

yall are still men

theres not the subterfuge that you have to go through with women

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:48 PM

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68. "god damn i'm glad i don't dislike women as much as you."
In response to Reply # 62


  

          

sheesh.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:50 PM

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76. "i like them fine--"
In response to Reply # 68


          

but i KNOW them

  

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SoWhat
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82. "uh huh."
In response to Reply # 76


  

          

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:28 PM

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150. "congrats Deron...u win the give less fucks award"
In response to Reply # 47
Wed Jul-01-15 01:29 PM by MiracleRic

  

          

grow up Deron

or let's make this more about u

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
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158. "thanks!"
In response to Reply # 150


  

          

get on my level, ho. i'm quite awesome!

fuck you.

  

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Walk On
Member since Apr 04th 2005
8307 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:40 PM

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49. "...it would be appreciated if homegirl would have told the cat early on...."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

...just seems like the "good" thing to do... if the friend would be "in and out" of the circle...

...the timing is terrible...

...it's not something you shake off... needs some time.

<--- #LoveCitees

message brought to you by...

www.onustees.com

  

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Mafamaticks
Member since Jan 12th 2004
4190 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:40 PM

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50. "Where's the "Deron and Jessica are wrong?" option?"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Deron, it was a decade ago my nigga.

Jessica, you could of gave Deron a heads up at least.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:41 PM

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54. "ladies--"
In response to Reply # 0


          

with love cut the bullshit

you know good and well if the situation was reversed........

do i even have to finish that statement?

  

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vee-lover
Member since Jul 30th 2007
20388 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:44 PM

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56. "^what I just said above...your girl ain't even trying to hear it"
In response to Reply # 54


  

          

>with love cut the bullshit
>
>you know good and well if the situation was reversed........
>
>do i even have to finish that statement?

grassrootsphilosopher

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:45 PM

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58. "if my gal pal came to me w/this story i'd tell her"
In response to Reply # 54


  

          

to get the fuck over herself and that she'd be a fool to throw away a good thing b/c her man fucked some chick almost a decade ago. i'd remind her that she herself smanged some dudes casually and they're not a big deal to her anymore and it's the same w/her current man and the woman at issue. and then i'd order some more mimosas for the both of us and tell her to stfu about this bullshit b/c we gotta finish these drinks and get to Barney's before our favorite shoe sales guy gets off work.

fuck you.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:48 PM

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69. "ok but would you advise her--"
In response to Reply # 58


          

to be friends with the chick he smashed?

it should be all good?

even though she's been smiling in her face and not telling that she's been naked with her man?

......word?

  

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SoWhat
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79. "the fact that the other woman smashed EIGHT YEARS AGO"
In response to Reply # 69


  

          

is no reason not to be friends w/her today if she's cool.

he chose my homie. the other chick lost.

who cares? if she still cares about this shit i'd never stop shading her over it. if she throws away a good man over something so inconsequential i might not be able to continue our friendship. i dunno that i could be friends w/someone so immature. or at least so unlike me.


fuck you.

  

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vee-lover
Member since Jul 30th 2007
20388 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:57 PM

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90. "It's a big deal if those guys are still in her circle of friends "
In response to Reply # 58
Wed Jul-01-15 01:01 PM by vee-lover

  

          

> i'd remind her that she herself smanged some
>dudes casually and they're not a big deal to her anymore

And if she finds out (especially from hearsay) that a chick her man introduced to her as a friend was someone he used to have sex with...she's not going to b down with that in no way whatsoever

First off, by him not telling her, the optics of it seems like he might still be having "casual sex" w/her since he didn't bother to mention they were casual fuck buddies

And lastly, we all know women *in general* don't trust even their home girls around their man...so you already know what's up in regards to a chick he used to have sex with.

grassrootsphilosopher

  

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SoWhat
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95. "again - if my gal pal came to me w/this mess"
In response to Reply # 90


  

          

i'd shade the shit out of her for being a fool.

eight. years. ago.

get the fuck over it.

fuck you.

  

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vee-lover
Member since Jul 30th 2007
20388 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:22 PM

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132. "I bet another female friend wouldn't shade her - she'd say that ish"
In response to Reply # 95


  

          

seems shady that he would have someone around you as his friend that he use to have sex with and not even tell you abt it

a lot of women are already predisposed to assume a man is going to cheat anyway



>i'd shade the shit out of her for being a fool.
>
>eight. years. ago.
>
>get the fuck over it.

grassrootsphilosopher

  

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SoWhat
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:24 PM

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139. "*shrug*"
In response to Reply # 132


  

          

fuck you.

  

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flipnile
Member since Nov 05th 2003
12511 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:00 PM

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96. "Logical comparison has no place here, man."
In response to Reply # 54


          

This is Sparta! ...uh, I mean OKP.


Chick's still HANGING OUT with a former fuck-buddy. And she didn't even bother to tell her husband what the deal is. Notice how no one disagreeing with you even touches that point. Also notice how the argument (inaccurately) gets reduced to "everyone has a past!" lol.


Anyway, I've had my fill of bizzaro logic for today. Punching out, boys.

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
92693 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:45 PM

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61. "oh look bloo is back"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

smh*
~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:55 PM

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85. "with a vengeance, thickness--"
In response to Reply # 61


          

so.....how ya been

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
92693 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:34 PM

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257. "nah"
In response to Reply # 85


  

          


~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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BabySoulRebel
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Wed Jul-01-15 12:47 PM

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65. "I originally voted yellow "
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 12:55 PM by BabySoulRebel

  

          

but i changed my mind
this is all on Jessica

She did the introducing
introduced him as a friend
and never brought it up once, even in passing
the fact that he had to hear it from someone else when he could have heard it from the person who actually owes him anything makes this fucked up.

POST-EDIT:
In a perfect world
this would be a non-issue
those friends would have minded their business
and everyone could have lived in ignorance-as-bliss forever and forever
but the reality is
that people are messy and petty ESP with that kind of knowledge
If you are going to cross your streams like that
at least give people options by letting them know the deal
Deron should have been able to decide for himself whether he could live with that knowledge. Maybe he's built to carry that, maybe he's not.

here for dis.

  

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Mr. ManC
Member since Jan 26th 2009
11780 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:05 PM

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105. "so basically it has nothing to do with her sexual past"
In response to Reply # 65


  

          

it's that she wasn't honest about disclosing her sexual past to her man about this dude who is her friend.

I feel if there was a scenario where they got married, and dude started a new job, and a new coworker had a romantic past to his wife, he'd prolly feel some kind of way about that too.

but ultimately it doesn't matter. It can't matter. Nothing is happening in this story but bruised hurt dude ego. Lol like marry your wife and get over it.

________________________________________________

SUPA NERD LLC.
Knowledge Meets Nature
Musica Negra
#13irteen

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:12 PM

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118. "u made the point..."
In response to Reply # 105


  

          

and in the same breadth convinced yourself that the point didn't matter with some other weird and unrelated scenario lol

yes, he should get over it

but it's definitely inviting drama by not heading that shit off early

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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Mr. ManC
Member since Jan 26th 2009
11780 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:29 PM

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152. "lol I mean I knew that conclusion before I even typed that"
In response to Reply # 118


  

          

response. It's like my girl who is having an argument with her sis about marriage equality, and her sis is like "but it aint about religion"........except it is, haha.

as much as there will be mental gymnastics to make this NOT about dude's hurt feelings, that's what it is.

she wasn't dishonest, the activity just didn't matter. If he makes it matter then more power to him. He can marry them hurt feelings instead of her.

________________________________________________

SUPA NERD LLC.
Knowledge Meets Nature
Musica Negra
#13irteen

  

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BabySoulRebel
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Wed Jul-01-15 02:04 PM

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224. "lol well yeah"
In response to Reply # 152


  

          

but he still has to live with that ego
either he can suck it up and move on because the relationship is worth it
or he can get the hell on
but that's a choice that he should be able to make
not have someone else make the choice for him by omission.

here for dis.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:32 PM

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161. "wtf are you taking about?"
In response to Reply # 105


          

no one is saying she can't have a past but if she is going to introduce them and let her fiance hang out with his crew... tell the man.


you don't let him get cool with dude and his boys and let one of them being that shit up.


if you love you mate, you have to protect them.

she tossed that nigga into the lions den with raw meat undies... Niggas prolly played with him before going in too?

shut up already, damn

  

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Grand_Royal
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Wed Jul-01-15 01:06 PM

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106. "Yeah if I had to choose"
In response to Reply # 65


  

          

>this is all on Jessica
>
>She did the introducing
>introduced him as a friend
>and never brought it up once, even in passing
>the fact that he had to hear it from someone else when he
>could have heard it from the person who actually owes him
>anything makes this fucked up.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:10 PM

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114. "thank you for alladis"
In response to Reply # 65


  

          

that type of forethought and consideration is huge

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:36 PM

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170. "dammit, i luh honesty and common sense. thamk you"
In response to Reply # 65


          

a lot of liars in this post. no one wants to be served up on a platter.

she gave her fiance to HIS crew... and I'm not sure why.

shut up already, damn

  

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Mr. ManC
Member since Jan 26th 2009
11780 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:50 PM

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74. "just think, everytime he has gone down on her"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

he has basically been sucking that dude's dick.

he should break the engagement with her and elope with him.

real talk tho, what is distrustful of any of this? was she supposed to declare all of her past sexual escapades to see if he approved? Did he do that for her?

No violation *picks up flag* remains second down.

________________________________________________

SUPA NERD LLC.
Knowledge Meets Nature
Musica Negra
#13irteen

  

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vee-lover
Member since Jul 30th 2007
20388 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:59 PM

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94. "RE: just think, everytime he has gone down on her"
In response to Reply # 74


  

          

>he has basically been sucking that dude's dick.
>
>he should break the engagement with her and elope with him.
>
>real talk tho, what is distrustful of any of this? was she
>supposed to declare all of her past sexual escapades to see if
>he approved? Did he do that for her?

If that mofo is still someone you're bringing around me/us as a "friend, yes...gimme a heads up
>
>No violation *picks up flag* remains second down.
>
>

grassrootsphilosopher

  

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Mr. ManC
Member since Jan 26th 2009
11780 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:34 PM

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"she apparently knows him well though if she felt"


  

          

he was going to get his boxers in a bunch about it.

say that on date 3 with an outing with the friends and he probably would have labeled him as unwifeable from jump.

she instead waited long enough for him to be sold on HER and not her PAST cause her past shouldn't matter anyway.

she might want to dodge that bullet if he is legit feeling some kinda way about it.

________________________________________________

SUPA NERD LLC.
Knowledge Meets Nature
Musica Negra
#13irteen

  

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PimpTrickGangstaClik
Member since Oct 06th 2005
14742 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:52 PM

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80. "Both wrong"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Jessica should have detailed the nature of their relationship once they started interacting with the friend together on a regular basis.

Deron needs to get over it. It's not that big of a deal unless he suspects that they might get right back at it.

_______________________________________
You ain't the only one whose got problems. You ain't the only one who knows pain. Get up off your ass and just solve them. You still got a chance to try to change, try the shit again.
Devin tha Dude

  

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Case_One
Charter member
54444 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:53 PM

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81. "He's about to Marry the love of "His LIfe". Dude needs to chill."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

If he loves his lady then he will let her past be where it is.



.
.
.
"Romans 10 : 9 says, "If you declare
with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,”
and believe in your heart that
God raised him from the dead,
you will be saved."

  

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SoWhat
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154163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 12:55 PM

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86. "Toni Braxton's 'He Wasn't Man Enough' is in my head now."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAF8OT8MB30

"He Wasn't Man Enough"

Darkchild, oh yeah
Toni Braxton, oh
Ha-ha, uh-huh
Yeah, uh, uh
Darkchild yeah

Listen girl
Who do you think I am?
Don't you know that he was my man?
But I chose to let him go
So why do you act like
I still care about him?
Looking at me like I'm hurt
When I'm the one who said I didn't
want it to work
Don't you forget I had him first?


What you thinkin'?
He's not playing me
He wasn't man enough for me
If you don't know now here's chance
I've already had your man
Do you wonder just where he's been, yeah?
Do not be worried about him
Now it's time you know the truth
I think he's just the man for you


What are you thinking?
Do you know about us back then?
Do you know i dumped your husband,
girlfriend?
I'm not thinking 'bout him
But you married him
Do you know I made him leave?
Do you know he begged to stay with me?
He wasn't man enough for me

Listen girl
Didn't he tell you the truth?
If not then why don't you ask him?
Then maybe you can be more into him
Instead of worrying about me
And hopefully you won't find
All of the reasons why his love didn't
count And why we couldn't work it out





Oh yeah So many reasons why our love is
through, yeah
What makes you think he'll be good to you, no
It makes no sense cause he will never change
Girl you better recognize the game, oh yeah

What are you thinking?
Do you know about us back then?
Do you know i dumped your husband,
girlfriend?
I'm not thinking 'bout him
But you married him
Do know I made him leave
Do you know he begged to stay with me
He wasn't man enough for me

fuck you.

  

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StephBMore
Member since Sep 11th 2014
1373 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:05 PM

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104. "i don't think anyone is wrong but to avoid awkward or uncomfortable "
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

situations like this, she *could* have told him "look this is what it is..." but this is really about knowing your partner. I have dated guys who could care NAUGHT about my past relationships and who I slept with. they don't want to know because "you're with me now" and then I have dealt with a man who got jealous over my godbrother because he read a message he sent to me saying he was in love with me in college and blah blah...which he (my god brother) eventually showed his wife and said yes i loved stephanie, i felt this way and his wife was like "do you still love her? no? don't care."

i am not friends with that many ppl i slept with but to be honest, if i see them becoming friends and building a bond, I would feel the need to say "listen i see y'all getting close and full disclosure..." just because i want to avoid an issue where they get in an argument and the friend goes "that's why i fucked yo bitch."

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
51977 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:12 PM

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119. "See, and that's really all I think Deron wanted..."
In response to Reply # 104


  

          

>i am not friends with that many ppl i slept with but to be
>honest, if i see them becoming friends and building a bond, I
>would feel the need to say "listen i see y'all getting close
>and full disclosure..." just because i want to avoid an issue
>where they get in an argument and the friend goes "that's why
>i fucked yo bitch."

I don't at all agree that Deron is an immature, insecure bitch or whatever is being said here, but it's expected on here. I don't think he cared to know EVERY single guy she's slept with, but that's always gonna feel weird when you get that close to someone and have ZERO idea. And the thing is, the girl is definitely fine, and most guys are always gonna wonder if certain guys have tried her, or will try her, but they can keep it inside and never say anything.

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

Twitter and Instagram - @DJ_RTistic

  

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SoWhat
Charter member
154163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:22 PM

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133. "he might not be built to be w/a fine woman."
In response to Reply # 119


  

          

b/c dudes are gonna try it w/her. so?

his focus needs to be ON HER. she has chosen him. out of the billions of dudes in the world she could be with...she chose him. and she chooses him every day. she's not w/him b/c she has no other options - she chose him. he should be honored. he should understand that she chose him b/c he's special - more so than the billions of dudes she could be with. and she chooses him everyday.

it's not about who will try it w/her...they will all try it. so?

fuck you.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:26 PM

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146. "he'd likely rather not be cool with those dudes"
In response to Reply # 133


  

          

informed decisions are fun

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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SoWhat
Charter member
154163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:28 PM

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149. "that's one of his limitations."
In response to Reply # 146


  

          

which is what it is.

i can understand that.

fuck you.

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
51977 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:44 PM

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184. "^^THISSSSS. And I totally get that part, too"
In response to Reply # 146


  

          

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

Twitter and Instagram - @DJ_RTistic

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
65407 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:54 PM

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203. "end post."
In response to Reply # 146


          

shut up already, damn

  

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StephBMore
Member since Sep 11th 2014
1373 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:22 PM

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134. "yeah who knows how he heard it but "
In response to Reply # 119


  

          

it's always best coming from your partner especially if it was an on going situation (judging from the OP it was more than once or twice). Seems like maybe he heard and was taken back and that probably upset him more. If he knew before he heard it on the street, he'd be better prepared when the streets mentioned it lol...you don't ever want to look like a fool. I guess his pride is a little hurt but if he truly loves her and if he likes old dude, then he needs to work through his issue and get back to being happy with his fiance and his new friend.

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:30 PM

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154. "yo, that joint was at least on and off for 2 years"
In response to Reply # 134


  

          

yea, that's some shit worth telling just so u don't end up looking like u have something to hide

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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-DJ R-Tistic-
Member since Nov 06th 2008
51977 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 02:22 PM

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242. "Yupp!! "
In response to Reply # 134


  

          

------------------------------

50+ FREE Mixes on www.DJR-Tistic.com!

Twitter and Instagram - @DJ_RTistic

  

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blkprinceMD05
Member since Nov 29th 2004
40936 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 04:39 PM

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319. "^^^^"
In response to Reply # 134


  

          

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

  

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Atillah Moor
Member since Sep 05th 2013
13825 posts
Fri Jul-03-15 07:38 AM

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547. "Always marry a 7 or 8 never a 9 or 10"
In response to Reply # 119


  

          

______________________________________

Everything looks like Oprah kissing Harvey Weinstein these days

  

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MiracleRic
Member since Oct 21st 2002
45200 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:17 PM

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127. "yep"
In response to Reply # 104


  

          

and here's the thing...u may not know what type of person that man is until this situation

i'm not the jealous type at all but i just don't like surprises lol

like i wouldn't be mad in this situation but i'd definitely have Nick Young face for a few weeks

http://images.complex.com/complex/image/upload/t_in_content_image/nick-young-confused-face-300x256_nqlyaa.png

Let me sport my Air Hyperbole 2010s in peace. (c) ansomble

Building repetoires (c) spm since 1983

  

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soken
Member since Aug 31st 2009
763 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:07 PM

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109. "I don't see any issues, He with her now, thats the point"
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Jul-01-15 01:24 PM by soken

          

Stop buggin, that shit was back in college. Focus on the present.

we keep it moving,

  

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teefiveten
Member since Oct 02nd 2008
33019 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:09 PM

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112. "LOLOL."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

.

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

  

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atruhead
Charter member
84532 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:09 PM

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113. "my only thing is it's highly unlikely he wouldnt smash again"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I probably dont know anyone involved, but if she got vulnerable I dont see him being like "nah, Im cool with your fiance now"

those are the type of niggas I dont trust, especially if her homeboy is still single

  

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bloocollar
Member since Aug 14th 2008
18163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:16 PM

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125. "even YOU see it--"
In response to Reply # 113


          

im like are these nwords serious?

  

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SoWhat
Charter member
154163 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:16 PM

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126. "there are billions of men in the world who would smash her."
In response to Reply # 113


  

          

and there are hundreds of them who she'd smash.

she knows several men right now today w/whom it would go down - b/c she wants to and they want to.

this is the reality for every man in a relationship w/a woman.

fuck you.

  

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teefiveten
Member since Oct 02nd 2008
33019 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:21 PM

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131. "they don't want to hear it"
In response to Reply # 126


  

          

.

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

  

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atruhead
Charter member
84532 posts
Wed Jul-01-15 01:23 PM<