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2 dudes a week for 2 long-lived QB careers (35-ish years). That's a lot of dicks for anybody regardless of situations. Normal 'hoes' don't get through that many dudes, right? I'm counting this like different dudes even though that may not be true. I'm thinking the average 'loose' broad who gives it up for free probably gets through 2 DIFFERENT AND NEW dudes a month on average. Maybe I'm underselling bigtime. I need data.
I don't know how you can ever draw a line after you open the swinger door. It is more complex than the threesome thing to me even if the emotion tied to having a threesome with the wrong third person would get somebody killed fo sho. IE: if someone likes the 3rd person too much or the 3rd person isn't above getting at one of the married people in a 1 on 1. Kilt.
But swinging though...other dudes planting their flag on your wife's moon? Tasting what you be tasting? Stroking, groping, poking, prodding, riding, biting, squeezing, pulling hair, marina...you get it...hell naw! And a bunch of dudes in one night!? Mane! I don't know if I could swing that...even if me and mine were swinging.
Forced monogamy IS terrible though. Key word is 'forced'. That's why I'm glad I got it in when I could before I got tied up with someone I like being with. It is a huge advantage to getting married after some 'living'/later in life. I have ho-ish thoughts from time to time, but that window is closed and I know it. And I can look back on my set of stories as well as forward to continuing to get it in with my wife and be fine. Hopefully that never changes.
I weep loudly and with crocodile tears for my brothers who don't have wives that let them have at it. You know, certain positions outlawed, not giving head, and/or just general lack of 'on the same page' sexual situations. Just thinking about it gives me hella heebie jeebies.
I also weep for the cats I know who got married right after high school or even college. Sure, some of them had 'good careers' by the time they jumped broom so they are okay as long as they want to be. But the other 80% of those dudes!? I know those cats want more stories. More stamps on their passports. More notches in their belt. Okay...I'll be more literal just in-case...I know those dudes wish they had tagged up more chicks! I see how they look at EVERYBODY. And I be lookin too, but I have a story to go with why I'm looking at some of them cuz they remind me of someone I had 'times' with. They be looking hungrily. Thirstily. Rubbing their hands like Baby. Grunting at chicks like Rawse. Wishing. Lamenting. Hoping.
One of my main homies from high school is going through the separation process now after being with a chick from high school. They are both in their late 30s. She's calling it quits on him and has most likely been creeping with a dude he doesn't know but he knows about.
!
Two kids too. And I'm trying to be there for him as a homeboy. It is also my duty to hit him with properly placed real talk so that he doesn't show up damn near 40 years old trolling for chicks looking like Huggie Bear outta jail on I'm Gonna Git Ya Sucka. But I know it is gonna be tough on him. Sure, there's the love he has for his soon-to-be ex eating away at him. There's the pride of losing a wife. There's the past...all of the SHIT they had to have gone through in 20 years of existing in each other's lives.
But...there's also a whole adult life of BEING 25-32 and getting at randoms that he passed on to be with her. And now, he can try to reconcile after the fact, but it is going to be different BECAUSE HE'S OLDER NOW.
At the worst, he's gonna be using chicks to make up for 'lost' time. But he's gonna have to mute his adult standards, feelings, and awareness to put himself in the situations you need to be in to get at randoms. Back in the day, when a negro didn't have nothing but a leather couch, some plastic weights and a 6-foot barbell, one of those big and heavy Sony TVs, and a queen pillowtop mattress to lose, decision-making processes could be far different...especially at 1 AM.
I just hope my boy doesn't end up stuck in sugar daddy central trying to capture a feeling that he never really knew.
>...says the woman in this article:
>
>http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/feb/13/experience-i-slept-with-3000-men-sex-swingers
>
>It was the night I slept with 14 men that I first started to
>try to work out how many partners I’ve been with. The truth
>is, I’m not sure. My conservative estimate is about 100 guys
>a year for more than three decades. I’m 63 now and I’ve
>slowed down a little – but only a little. Why do I do it?
>Having sex isn’t something I do for a living, but it is my
>passion. It’s the most enjoyable, exhilarating, satisfying
>way to spend your time. Some women like yoga, some like
>badminton. I like carnality.
>
>I am actually married. Barry and I have been together since I
>was 15 – we wed when I was 19, have two grandchildren, and
>he’s my world. But neither of us puts sex on a pedestal. We
>see it for what it is: separate from love. It’s not natural
>to stick with one sexual partner for 60 years. Life is about
>experimenting and experiencing, and that’s what we do. Barry
>goes with other women. I don’t get jealous because I know he
>loves me. Until the age of 28, I’d only been with him and we
>had a terrific sex life, but one day he brought home a
>swingers’ magazine he’d picked up from a workmate. He sort
>of joked we should try it; I told him not to be daft, and he
>never mentioned it again.
>
>But I kept looking at the mag and imagining how fun it might
>be. Eventually I told him we should give it a go. He looked
>like a kid at Christmas. The first couple we met – through
>the listings in that magazine – were university lecturers in
>their 40s, and I still remember driving to their home that
>Friday. Barry stopped the car and said, “Are we sure about
>this?” We were so nervous, but we were also insanely
>excited. I said we’d try it once and see how it went. And it
>went… joyously.
>
>As soon as we met them I was flirting with the guy. John was
>sophisticated and handsome, and over dinner there was this
>intense chemistry. Afterwards, there were a few minutes when
>just he and I were in the living room, and I thought it was
>now or never so I kissed him, and that was that. By the time
>Barry came in with John’s wife, we were otherwise engaged. I
>remember looking at Barry’s face and seeing a big smile come
>over it; I knew everything would be fine, and that life had
>changed for ever.
>
>We became committed swingers, spending weekends meeting up
>with couples or going to parties to swap partners. Suddenly
>everything was exciting. You’d be at work, and you’d think
>about what you were up to that evening and it sent a shiver
>down your spine. Some couples – like John and his wife –
>would become close friends, even when the sex stopped. Others
>you’d see only once. The night I slept with 14 men was at a
>swingers’ party in Manchester. I remember driving there
>feeling almost uncontrollably lustful. The next day I felt
>achy, in that lovely way, like when you’ve been to the gym.
>
>In 1997, we decided to open a swingers’ club in Sheffield.
>We were fed up with work and wanted to do something we were
>passionate about. It’s still thriving today. We never have
>sex during opening hours – it’s our business and we’re
>professional about it. But, of course, when the place shuts,
>we’ve got an entire club full of facilities – and an
>ever-growing circle of open-minded couples – to play with.
>It’s not all been perfect, of course. Not every lover is
>attentive. I remember in my 40s going with an 18-year-old,
>just to see what it would be like. Quick was the answer.
>
>We’re safety-conscious and I’ve never felt in any danger.
>Barry is normally in the same room or not far away. I’ve
>recently had a knee operation, which means I’m walking with
>a stick, so I’m taking it easy. I had only three lovers last
>year. I still have the same sex drive but I’m more relaxed
>now. I’m not someone who’s ever going to dress like a
>woman half her age just to get attention. But if guys still
>find me attractive – well, why not? People ask if we have
>any regrets and we do – we wish we’d found that mag five
>or six years earlier.
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