"I need advice but I'm afraid yall will just snark me"
So I'll try to take all emotion out of my post as to not make it easier to get hurt.
My child is 2.5
He isn't potty trained- I'm ok with that.
He isn't talking. He points, says mama, daddy, juice, diaper, but that's about it.
I sound words out and when he repeats them it sounds like mama, daddy, juice, diaper.
I don't know how to fix this.
Also I recently got him some cards to try to play a matching game. No real luck with that either.
This is what I'm thinking.
He has too many toys/distractions, so today I turned all his toys off. I realized it didn't make sense that they were all turned on. It made it too easy to distract him.
I tried having him play in his room with the door shut. This didn't work at all because he cried the whole time by the door, and never started just playing with his toys. I tried this for 45 min. He cried for 45 min. The only good thing was once I opened the door and turned on a small TV in his room he layer in his bed and watched TV and as long as I didn't shut the door he stayed in his room. So I think I made a little progress.
Repetition and consistency is easier said than done however I believe this is where I'm supposed to start. So maybe instead of me thinking I'm doing things wrong because they didn't work at first, I should keep doing it until it does work, even tho that may mean I'm insane.
I don't know where to begin with the matching game. I tried 2 or 3 matches at a time and he wasn't interested for long. Should I just give him one match? How do I know he even understands the concept of the game?
I believe I get too emotional and take things too personal and give up on an idea when repetition is what is needed. I wish I had someone to show me what I should do so I can feel confident that I'm doing it right.
I also separated his toys by color and have started focusing on one color a day. Today was green. He can't pronounce green. He was more focused on the toy than the color.
I've tried the matching game 2 times today and will try it again. And I'll pull out green toys at least once more today. But honestly I feel like I'm a failure as a parent.
If he isn't talking by 3 then there is a free program he can go to for kids who aren't talking.
But I want to do something now. I think the problem is more me than him. I don't want him to be delayed because I didn't know what to do.
So any advice without snark would be appreciated. But I would appreciate the advice to be instructional and not general.
5. "No snark.....this ain't the place for advice" In response to Reply # 0
That is to say that other okps may have kids.
But they can't speak to the development of YOUR child, they're just going by what you're telling them, and you may be missing something in the translation.
There may be professionals on here who CAN help, but it's impossible to tell who's who.
Not everything is googlable, and I'm sure you know that.
I'm just saying, find a professional for your son, not just a charter member.
10. "Talk to your pediatrician " In response to Reply # 0
And maybe get his hearing checked since he has vision problems. Try reading to him.
Boys are slower than girls tho if it's any consolation. My friends kid was the same and caught up. He was worried. His wife who is a psychologist said the same thing...
15. "I will. and I will ask them this" In response to Reply # 10
When picking a book to read to my child what kind of book should I focus on. Should I expect him to look at the book as I read it to him? Should I expect him to repeat back what I'm saying. What should I do when he loses interest in the book or tries to flip pages when I haven't finished reading the page? Should I just focus on saying the words and not the visual aspect since he has vision problems?
This is the kind of advice I'm looking for.
>And maybe get his hearing checked since he has
vision >problems. Try reading to him. > >Boys are slower than girls tho if it's any consolation. My >friends kid was the same and caught up. He was worried. His >wife who is a psychologist said the same thing...
29. "RE: I will. and I will ask them this" In response to Reply # 15
My daughter is 2.5. She has about 5 books that she can basically tell me the words to each of them by heart. She loves...
Moo, Baa, La La La
Goodnight Moon
Kiss Good Night
Where Oh Where is Huggle Buggle Bear
and I forgot the last one.
I read to her in a room lit with the night light and hold her in my lap to read to her. This works for us. I agree with everyone else. Talk to your pediatrician and see what will help. They might recommend a speech therapist and maybe a change in preschool.
My lil Zoe does watch tv (all educational stuff), videos on the computer (all educational), and has her own iPad where she will do puzzles games and watch her shows. But even with all that, I try to make sure she takes time to play in her room with none of that stimulation and I also try to make sure she doesn't watch tv all day every day.
"We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents" - Bob Ross
"I'm wearing a MSU Tshirt because I went to MSU, you are wearing a UM Tshirt because you went to Walmart!" -unknown.
32. "Really have to just try multiple books and see which ones he responds to..." In response to Reply # 15
Seems like books with "exciting" words tend to stick with our daughter the most....although she loves that simple ass book Goodnight Moon for some reason.... Little Blue Truck is another good one.... there's a whole RACK of highly recommended children books on Amazon. Start there. .
11. "this is a great place for advice, just do some research" In response to Reply # 0
If I undertand your post correctly your child is almost 3, and not communicating like you think she should
Ok, rule autism out because if she was autie, she would be progressing great and then suddenly regress, if your child never progressed there can be no regression and therefore no autism
Maybe it's nothing. Maybe it's somethin. Either way talk to your pediatrician
13. "I dont have a lot of experience but I can tell you this" In response to Reply # 0
kids grow and do things at different times. My son was the first grandchild in my family and my wife's family. So he has been the measuring stick for when certain milestones should be achieved by my brother and sister in law. But that isnt exactly fair. My son has developed so fast its not even faire to compare my nieces and nephews to him. He was talking in sentences at 2 years old. He was able to recognize words and logos all around him around 2.5 years. For example he knew what kind of car everyone in the family drove by looking at the logos. His memory is really really good and he memorized anything. We would take him on car rides and by the landmarks he would know where we were going. Or what place was near by. If I went to the grocery store by the bowling alley he would ask to go bowling because he knew it was down the street. He knew his ABC's and could count to 20 before he was 2 years old.
When my niece came alone 2 years ago the comparisons began. Anytime she did anything her parents were calling asking how old E was when he did this and that. She was always way behind him. But I knew and my wife knew that our son wasnt "normal". We knew there was something different about him. You could literally see the disappointment in my sister in laws face when she thought my niece was doing something early only to find out my son had done far sooner. But the thing is she was doing these things at the normal rate for a healthy girl.
As of now my niece is almost 3 and still talks in jumble nonsense. You can pick out words here and there but definitely not clear. She isnt potty trained either. She refuses and its hilarious actually. But she is in fact a normal and healthy toddler.
If you are really worried check with your doctor. They should be asking you questions during his check ups to see if he is doing certain things. Can he recognize some colors and shapes, recognize words, how active he is, etc. Let them know you are worried and I am sure they will be able to tell you if there is a need for concern.
When my son was that age people used to be shocked when they found out his age. If I took him to the park he was playing with 5 year olds because the other kids his age didnt talk. So the question I got was always what did you do with him? I give this piece of advice to all new parents who ask for advice. I think it definitely has played a role in his development. Talk to your child.
When he was born I was home alone with him from 6am until 3pm. We would get up I would put him in his baby seat and I would talk to him. Good morning how are you? Look at the sun outside, etc. Just like there was another adult in the house. When I grabbed items I would call them by their name. Lets grab the remote and watch TV. Then show him the remote. If I made breakfast I would explain to him what I was doing and ingredients I was using. He was only a few months but he watched. He was paying attention. I used normal everyday interaction as teaching moments. For example we are going to get put on your blue shoes today. Im going to eat a red apple for lunch. When he started walking I would call out toys and tell him to bring them to me. Bring me the yellow ball. Or the block that has an S on it.
That continues today. If we are at the grocery store I have him sound out signs in the aisles or on packages. He was having trouble with rhyming words so we made a game in the car where I pick out things we see and have him give me 3 rhyming words for it. I throw math problems at him while driving or randomly at home. He will ask me now to do the math game or the rhyming game. Learning is fun to him and it shows.
Like you said it all starts with you. You have to carve out a little bit of time every day and make that his time. Read a book, color a picture, play a game, or just talk to him while you have a snack. But find that time.
November 8th, 2005 The greatest night in the history of GD!
14. "i have experience with this" In response to Reply # 0 Tue Dec-16-14 07:27 PM by auset1
my son has hyperlexia, its on the autism spectrum google search it, then talk to your doctor. my son repeated everything everything back to you, its called echolalia didnt talk till about 3 and only to say words like juice or moon had a preoccupation with numbers and letters. very high IQ self taught reading at 2 or three
not saying he has THIS, but talk with your doctor.
also an aversion to loud noises he listens to tv and the radio very low, normal volume to us is VERY loud to him, in school he would have a hard time in music class and generally other loud noises in school.
22. "Jeremiah loves music and dancing" In response to Reply # 18
His vision and focusing is the challenge. I stepped out the house to make this post because I needed time to think and vent. I came back home with a better attitude. I also purchased a book on Kindle and am loving reading these replies ♥♥Church Diva♥♥
there's so much out there now as far as educational games and toys
I don't know what to tell u as far as potty training
all the babies in my family get on the pot early mainly for financial reasons and also cause nobody babysits kids until they're droppin dueces in the toilet
He is so funny because he uses his finger and exits out the games without playing. He is fainted with moving the screen, not the games. And yes he is dropping deuces heavy! ♥♥Church Diva♥♥
20. "I'm a techie so mine have always been exposed to stuff online" In response to Reply # 0
Note: I stay home so preschool was mostly done by me or my mom
We've had a subscription to starfall.com for years. They loved playing the videos and mimicking the movement songs. These are things they would be getting in a preschool/daycare. You can watch "Head-Shoulders-Knees and Toes" and Wheels on the bus without a subscription. They help with gross motor skills, body part identification and vocabulary. If you like it I suggest subscribing. They also have a "radio" function that plays basic nursery rhymes and kids songs to help with vocabulary.
You may also want to check into abcmouse.com it costs a bit more but is pretty thorough and you select a level that fits your child.
Also check out the free programs at your local library for toddlers. You will get a chance to interact with other mothers and observe them and the children while playing and learning. The system in NOVA has some great free puppet shows, story times and sing alongs for toddlers.
26. "raising these babies is a tough job sometimes" In response to Reply # 24
Keep smiling and praying. Mine were all over this place in their development but the potty training was non-negotiable. I couldn't deal with changing diapers for more than one at a time and the younger 3 are 1.5-2 years apart so they had to get it done quickly.
I used the let them run around naked and help me clean up any messes method. They hated the stuff running down their legs and hated the clean up even more. After 2 straight days of naked mess we were good. We went straight to underwear and only used pull ups on long outings or at night. The pull-ups were to much like diapers so they don't mind going in them. I don't think I would have been able to use that method if we had more carpet.
_>_>_>_>_ The official symbols of the School Daze/A Different World/HBCU sweater wearin'/Gumby hair havin' set as much as other New Jack Kings and hip-hop artists were....Dr. Claw talking about New Edition
25. "My nephew didn't speak well when he was around that age" In response to Reply # 0
His parents got him a speech therapist and she taught him sign language for basic words like shoe, play, eat, more, etc. when we spoke to him we would say the word while doing the sign. If he wanted something he would just sign.
as he got older he dropped the signs and said the words. no need to panic.
But if he can say diaper and tell you when it needs to be changed, it's time to start teaching him "potty". At very least sit him on the potty first thing in the morning and before bed. Eventually he'll figure out its better than walking around in a shiity diaper.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Green Mile is a movie where the magical black man wrongly dies and the white man who let it happen lives forever.
27. "RE: I need advice but I'm afraid yall will just snark me" In response to Reply # 0 Tue Dec-16-14 10:09 PM by Sarah_Bellum
Everyone has given great advice so far, which is to get your son evaluated by a pediatrician as soon as possible. The longer you delaying the more damage you could do if your son has an developmental issue and is not just a late bloomer. Either or… I wouldn't leave it up to chance. See a doctor.
30. "I think boys seem to start talking later than girls....." In response to Reply # 0
at least that's what i've heard and read.... it might be tricknowledgey though.....because I've heard it from these soccer moms in my daughters daycare when they comment on how our daughter is so vocal and has such a huge vocabulary....I sense a tinge of saltiness from them...
She's 2 and literally the only one in her class talking this much...like a TON...sentences, ideas, etc....
The older boys in her class can't formulate full sentences at all, and don't really say much beyond mumbles..
I really don't think you have too much to stress about since he's only 2.5.
My nephew who's 3 is JUST now talking and he's only slightly above the speech level of my 2 year old daughter.
My cousins 4 year old son is finally talking like you'd imagine an average 4 year old should...but like my nephew, he started when he was around 3 years old too.... .
legsdiamond Member since May 05th 2011 79605 posts
Wed Dec-17-14 06:51 AM
33. "no kids, but I watched a nephew grunt until he was 4..." In response to Reply # 0 Wed Dec-17-14 06:55 AM by legsdiamond
My sister was young and it was her second child. I think she rewarded his grunts so he never had an incentive to use words. He turned out fine and will graduate from Savannah State in the spring.
I think kids at this age will only say what they need to get food or attention. If they get what they want by crying or saying baba.. why say more words?
There are a lot of great suggestions in here.
My 2 cents.
Keep talking to him
Keep the toys turned off except for the one he is playing with
Introduce a new word every day. If he is getting apple juice dont let him get away with just saying juice. Say apple 5 or 6 times and try to get him to repeat it before giving it to him
You can sing. Singing is a great way to teach kids new words and numbers.
Cheer him on, say thank you, please, etc.... these little rewards seem to work with young kids.
Dont put him in a room and force him to play. I would be terrified if my mother did that to me. It prolly feels like punishment at that age. Play with him in his room, once he gets going you can get up and leave the room.
34. "Interesting. Are his grandparents in his life?" In response to Reply # 0
What is your son's day to day interactions/life like?
I don't have the answers. More questions than anything. I wonder and watch my 9 month olds development. We read to her daily in english and spanish
If your son is around extended family are they constantly in his face talking to him all the time?
But yeah, get off OKP and holla at a speech and language pathologist. I dated one of them before. If you're in DC area inbox for her contact info. This kinda shit is not googleable.
37. "as others have said, " In response to Reply # 0
get to a doctor quick. along with that read to him. his interest may not be long, but that's fine. don't worry about that. his world is still brand new and full of discovery, so he'll be distracted.
but again reading and talking to him like a person will be very helpful. take him to the bookstore. they can help you locate books for his age. the topics won't really matter. it'll matter that you're interacting with him.
try not to get too frustrated. I'm sure its not an easy thing to deal with if he's not developing at the rate you think he should, but definitely catch a doctor asap.
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