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Subject: "The Game is to Be Told pt. 31" Previous topic | Next topic
Geah
Member since Feb 16th 2007
48265 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:07 PM

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"The Game is to Be Told pt. 31"


          

It's been a long time

Let us help you

@geahuwine

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
"exclusive but not committed"
Dec 10th 2014
1
had you asked him to define it?
Dec 10th 2014
2
nope.
Dec 10th 2014
3
      what are you questioning exactly?
Dec 10th 2014
5
           and what is it exactly that you want?
Dec 10th 2014
6
           *looks around*
Dec 10th 2014
7
           a. you'se a FOOL
Dec 10th 2014
9
                *hands you the kniiiiiife*
Dec 10th 2014
77
                     smooooooooooottthe shank a mf
Dec 10th 2014
84
           lol i want everything
Dec 10th 2014
26
           is this some bs?
Dec 10th 2014
10
                you questioning...
Dec 10th 2014
14
                     im not 100% fine with it.
Dec 10th 2014
28
                          then say that
Dec 10th 2014
30
                               saying that?
Dec 10th 2014
35
                                    on the first date?
Dec 10th 2014
40
                                    it be like that sometimes...
Dec 10th 2014
41
                                         I'm sorry, but these questions make it hard to believe you do
Dec 10th 2014
49
                                              lol i understand that there's no fool proof anything.
Dec 10th 2014
52
                                                   I feel you.. but I also think you KNOW the answers
Dec 10th 2014
79
                                                        nah
Dec 10th 2014
82
                                                             if it's meant to be...
Dec 10th 2014
88
                                    i'm a fan of whenever you need clarity, ask for it
Dec 10th 2014
45
                                         have you ever had the exclusive talk on the first date?
Dec 10th 2014
48
                                         there are plenty of people that "just know" from date 1
Dec 10th 2014
53
                                         me personally, no
Dec 10th 2014
54
                                         good points.
Dec 10th 2014
57
                                              no prob, you know i'm always #TeamNika
Dec 10th 2014
59
                                                   :)
Dec 10th 2014
74
Until that talk and them rules have been laid down
Dec 10th 2014
4
right...sorta
Dec 10th 2014
18
      if we both agreed to the same rules, how is it that?
Dec 10th 2014
29
           just he agreed doesn't mean he's gotta follow em
Dec 10th 2014
71
it means:
Dec 10th 2014
12
real shit. even if he ain't fuckin, options are being entertained
Dec 10th 2014
72
to me.....no.
Dec 10th 2014
33
not committed.
Dec 10th 2014
36
      i read it backwards
Dec 10th 2014
42
that. is. dumb. as. hell.
Dec 10th 2014
65
I think all monogamous relationships are exclusive but not committed...
Dec 10th 2014
69
*slow blink*
Dec 10th 2014
78
Exclusive by chance rather than by choice
Dec 10th 2014
85
it means he isnt banging anyone else, but wants to be.
Dec 10th 2014
89
this was weird.
Dec 10th 2014
8
drop your handkerchief...
Dec 10th 2014
11
i thought i was being direct by reciprocating the same feelings.
Dec 10th 2014
17
      you were...
Dec 10th 2014
46
Tying up loose ends
Dec 10th 2014
13
he sure ain't off "getting himself right".
Dec 10th 2014
15
this is what i'm thinking he's doing.
Dec 10th 2014
19
      he hasn't worked himself back to you yet...
Dec 10th 2014
31
           you right. i'll do that.
Dec 10th 2014
32
oh that was that old "situational I'm in
Dec 10th 2014
20
that's what i'm thinking.
Dec 10th 2014
23
yup, that dude is gone
Dec 10th 2014
47
What do you look like?
Dec 10th 2014
21
i'm cute.
Dec 10th 2014
25
He just putting his place holder in. You'll be up next.
Dec 10th 2014
24
he might be waiting to see you again
Dec 10th 2014
34
I just need a good Home Depot or Lowe's coupon. I've been
Dec 10th 2014
16
I don't know why this made me laugh
Dec 10th 2014
22
      I'm dead serious. My Mr. wants this welder for Christmas and I need
Dec 10th 2014
27
The crappier I treat ‘em, the more they want me. Why?
Dec 10th 2014
37
"men love a challenge."
Dec 10th 2014
38
lmao
Dec 10th 2014
39
You sure it ain't the other way around?
Dec 10th 2014
43
LOL
Dec 10th 2014
44
we like the chase
Dec 10th 2014
50
I love this. Men like mean! :(
Dec 10th 2014
55
yeah they do. it's hard. if you're rational and honest
Dec 10th 2014
64
      damn i've been called a robot recently
Dec 10th 2014
67
           i told a guy we should stop dating
Dec 10th 2014
70
                Oh, he'll be back. He wants his yells.
Dec 10th 2014
73
                     and she should reject that craziness
Dec 10th 2014
80
I'd wager that you aren't mean to the men that you really like
Dec 10th 2014
60
nah, i'm universally nice
Dec 10th 2014
63
because you attract masochists.
Dec 10th 2014
61
alot of men love to be abused. poor idiots.
Dec 10th 2014
68
nice as in thoughtful and pleasant. or nice as in chipper and bubbly.
Dec 10th 2014
76
thoughtful & pleasant, i like to think
Dec 10th 2014
83
      i have no idea what to say then. except welcome....
Dec 10th 2014
86
ego. works for guys and girls.
Dec 10th 2014
90
the chase, thinking you can be worn down
Dec 10th 2014
92
it's so true, man
Dec 10th 2014
93
Copy & Paste from CW: Earlier this year I went on several dates with thi...
Dec 10th 2014
51
The needier person usually is the one to be neurotic
Dec 10th 2014
56
i'm mad now
Dec 10th 2014
58
lol
Dec 10th 2014
62
i wonder if she listens to me too :-(
Dec 10th 2014
66
      a lot of people ask for advice but they already got the answers
Dec 10th 2014
75
going to sit you and nayaa down
Dec 10th 2014
81
ugh I need help
Dec 10th 2014
87
2 questions
Dec 10th 2014
91

NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:16 PM

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1. ""exclusive but not committed""
In response to Reply # 0


          

is this legit?



  

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morpheme
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:18 PM

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2. "had you asked him to define it?"
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

  

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NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:27 PM

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3. "nope."
In response to Reply # 2


          

i just hinted at my aversion to dating multiple people if i already like someone (him) and he more or less said he felt the same way. so we decided to take ourselves off the market and focus on each other. thats the only convo that's been had about it.

  

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morpheme
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:30 PM

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5. "what are you questioning exactly? "
In response to Reply # 3


  

          

  

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BabySoulRebel
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:30 PM

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6. "and what is it exactly that you want?"
In response to Reply # 5


  

          

here for dis.

  

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Geah
Member since Feb 16th 2007
48265 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:31 PM

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7. "*looks around*"
In response to Reply # 6


          

I wanna see you know who

@geahuwine

  

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BabySoulRebel
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:33 PM

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9. "a. you'se a FOOL"
In response to Reply # 7


  

          

b. you'se a FOOL
c. don't make me cut you.

here for dis.

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
92693 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:56 PM

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77. "*hands you the kniiiiiife*"
In response to Reply # 9


  

          


~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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BabySoulRebel
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Wed Dec-10-14 04:34 PM

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84. "smooooooooooottthe shank a mf"
In response to Reply # 77


  

          

https://33.media.tumblr.com/7c1e25a1cbecd57b30badf3c9c3d35c9/tumblr_n7nw2w1nPq1qfwa93o1_400.gif

here for dis.

  

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NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:51 PM

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26. "lol i want everything"
In response to Reply # 6


          

but i think the main thing i want is security

  

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NikaMandela
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10. "is this some bs?"
In response to Reply # 5


          

its like taking yourself off the market for someone who's only halfway claimed you.

they can just walk away and be like, ok, never mind. the same way they could if they had claimed you. so whats the difference?

i guess i don't necessarily see such a big difference except in name.

  

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morpheme
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:38 PM

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14. "you questioning..."
In response to Reply # 10


  

          

what you're fine with doing.
halt.

  

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NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:51 PM

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28. "im not 100% fine with it."
In response to Reply # 14


          

it feels like limbo.

  

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BabySoulRebel
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:52 PM

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30. "then say that"
In response to Reply # 28


  

          

how long have you been seeing each other?

here for dis.

  

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NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:05 PM

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35. "saying that?"
In response to Reply # 30


          

"I feel like we're in limbo" = "shit or get off the pot."

is it not better to be patient and wait for either outcome?

i know i can be neurotic, so this may not even be so bad.

it hasn't yet been a month. the exclusive convo happened during date 1. because we just clicked, for whatever that's worth.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
69476 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:15 PM

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40. "on the first date? "
In response to Reply # 35
Wed Dec-10-14 01:17 PM by legsdiamond

          

do you even know his last name? His favorite song?

Why are you always having these convo's so early? It's not fair to you or him to operate like this.


Do you have any plants at your house/apt?

  

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NikaMandela
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41. "it be like that sometimes..."
In response to Reply # 40


          

especially with two people who know what the fuck they want.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:41 PM

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49. "I'm sorry, but these questions make it hard to believe you do"
In response to Reply # 41


          

  

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NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:53 PM

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52. "lol i understand that there's no fool proof anything."
In response to Reply # 49


          

and there's no absolute right way of doing things.

in the meantime, i go with what feels right. that does not mean i don't have questions.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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Wed Dec-10-14 04:00 PM

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79. "I feel you.. but I also think you KNOW the answers"
In response to Reply # 52
Wed Dec-10-14 04:02 PM by legsdiamond

          

but you don't like them.

you just said men like a challenge down below and you are 100% correct

but do you apply this to your dating?

We love a challenge, we really do.

  

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NikaMandela
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82. "nah"
In response to Reply # 79


          

i actually don't have any misgivings about HIM. i just feel weird being in limbo.

i also don't think all men like challenges. i think men who are more mature, have real responsibilities, and know what they want are less likely to be about that chase shit.
someone being harder to get does not mean they're a better partner for you than someone who likes you from day 1.

anyway i'm just not that chick. if i like you, i like you and i'm not going to pretend otherwise. i think he likes that about me. it seems like we both like 'easy.'

  

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legsdiamond
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88. "if it's meant to be... "
In response to Reply # 82


          

  

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BabySoulRebel
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45. "i'm a fan of whenever you need clarity, ask for it"
In response to Reply # 35


  

          

if y'all were comfortable enough to broach the exclusivity subject on the first date, surely you should feel comfortable enough by now to ask that you both further outline what it is you both expect and want.

If you don't I would look at:
- do I really want what I say I want (a committed relationship I'm assuming)? -
- What do I require for me to feel like I am getting what I say I want?
- What have I heard being expressed as far as the other person's desire for what I want?
- Does their expressed interest level match mine?

here for dis.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:40 PM

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48. "have you ever had the exclusive talk on the first date? "
In response to Reply # 45


          

and if you have, how long did that relationship last?

I'm a dude and we had that convo I wouldn't believe a word either of us said about being exclusive so soon.

  

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NikaMandela
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53. "there are plenty of people that "just know" from date 1"
In response to Reply # 48


          

not saying thats the situation with us, but it happens often enough for me not to think its out of the question.

  

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BabySoulRebel
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54. "me personally, no"
In response to Reply # 48


  

          

I did however become exclusive AND committed after what was originally supposed to be a one night stand
it was the guy too that initiated it, I was gonna let shit rock as it appeared.
that lasted a total of 6 years combined.

here for dis.

  

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NikaMandela
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57. "good points."
In response to Reply # 45


          

thanks

  

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BabySoulRebel
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59. "no prob, you know i'm always #TeamNika"
In response to Reply # 57


  

          

here for dis.

  

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NikaMandela
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74. ":)"
In response to Reply # 59


          

  

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Geah
Member since Feb 16th 2007
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4. "Until that talk and them rules have been laid down"
In response to Reply # 1


          

it's legit.

TO ME

it's I don't wanna fuck wit nobody else but i CAN

@geahuwine

  

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Calico
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:43 PM

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18. "right...sorta"
In response to Reply # 4


  

          

...i see it as, YOU can't get with anyone else, but i can opt out at any time...

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

  

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NikaMandela
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29. "if we both agreed to the same rules, how is it that?"
In response to Reply # 18


          

  

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Calico
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71. "just he agreed doesn't mean he's gotta follow em"
In response to Reply # 29


  

          

..but it does mean he's gonna really try to follow em IMO

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

  

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Fishgrease
Member since Feb 13th 2006
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:37 PM

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12. "it means: "
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

I can phuck other people until I find someone better than you....

but you have to be faithful to me.

---------------------------------------
blog: www.wonderfullyhorrible.blogspot.com
instagram: Fishgrease
twitter: wooly_caesar
Podcast www.soundcloud.com/circlegang

  

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Ralo13
Member since May 29th 2007
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Wed Dec-10-14 03:46 PM

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72. "real shit. even if he ain't fuckin, options are being entertained"
In response to Reply # 12


  

          

________________________________________

"A Slew Of Empty Gas In My Tank" (C) Khujo Goodie

http://i.imgur.com/gFXu2he.jpg

http://bit.ly/1r3dl53

  

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MrThomas43423
Member since Jul 03rd 2002
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:59 PM

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33. "to me.....no."
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

if you're committed, then when is your inexclusivity for? like what is that a open door to?
---------------------------------------
it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

  

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NikaMandela
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:06 PM

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36. "not committed."
In response to Reply # 33


          

its a pre-relationship relationship.

  

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MrThomas43423
Member since Jul 03rd 2002
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:22 PM

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42. "i read it backwards"
In response to Reply # 36


  

          

yeah. its a pre relationship relationship...one of those necessary waste of times. like everyone else said its the relationship probationary period.
---------------------------------------
it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

  

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bonamie
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Wed Dec-10-14 02:46 PM

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65. "that. is. dumb. as. hell."
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

sorry
not sorry
what's the pt exactly?
if u like it though, we love it.

-----------------------------------
we aint the two and i aint the one- lyte

  

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Buddy_Gilapagos
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Wed Dec-10-14 03:18 PM

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69. "I think all monogamous relationships are exclusive but not committed..."
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

until you get married but maybe that's just me.

But if you are just dating someone exclusive and you meet someone you'd rather be with, wouldn't you break up with that person to be with the person you'd rather be with?


>is this legit?
>
>
>
>


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

http://blackpeopleonlocalnews.tumblr.com/

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
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Wed Dec-10-14 03:59 PM

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78. "*slow blink*"
In response to Reply # 1


  

          


~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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Cocobrotha2
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Wed Dec-10-14 04:34 PM

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85. "Exclusive by chance rather than by choice"
In response to Reply # 1


          

He's saying "yeah, I'm not fucking anybody else but I wouldn't turn down other options if they were available."

<-><-><-><-><-><-><-><-><->
<-><-><-><-><-><-><-><-><->

  

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cgonz00cc
Member since Aug 01st 2002
32680 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 05:04 PM

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89. "it means he isnt banging anyone else, but wants to be."
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

Sorry

  

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dew drops
Member since Sep 25th 2009
95 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:33 PM

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8. "this was weird."
In response to Reply # 0
Wed Dec-10-14 12:34 PM by dew drops

          

i met this guy through volunteering a some months ago. he recently started a new job that requires him a lot of traveling. so he's not part of the org anymore. we hang out together for the first time not too long ago with some of the volunteers we both know. he was all flirty, touchy-feely, which threw me off cause he has never acted this way towards me. a few days later we're talking on gchat, and i ask him about his behavior. he says he's attracted to me and wonders if i'm mad about his behavior. i tell him that i'm attracted to him, too, and that i'm not upset. this was about 2 weeks ago, and i haven't heard from him since.

what gives?

  

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morpheme
Charter member
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:37 PM

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11. "drop your handkerchief..."
In response to Reply # 8


  

          

i am rather subtle
but for you a more direct approach may work.
you've got to remind him of you.

sum'n.

  

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dew drops
Member since Sep 25th 2009
95 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:42 PM

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17. " i thought i was being direct by reciprocating the same feelings."
In response to Reply # 11


          

i feel like the ball is in his court now to do something cause i don't know what else to say to show that i am interested in him.

  

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morpheme
Charter member
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Wed Dec-10-14 01:30 PM

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46. "you were..."
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

but the time might be to remind him.
nothing of the "you said" nature.
but maybe a cute photo with a sly caption.

  

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Geah
Member since Feb 16th 2007
48265 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:38 PM

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13. "Tying up loose ends "
In response to Reply # 8


          

or he loosening up tied ends

u one of many

don't no dude not talk to a chick for 2 weeks without having something on reserve.

@geahuwine

  

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morpheme
Charter member
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:41 PM

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15. "he sure ain't off "getting himself right"."
In response to Reply # 13


  

          

  

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dew drops
Member since Sep 25th 2009
95 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:44 PM

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19. "this is what i'm thinking he's doing."
In response to Reply # 13


          


>u one of many
>
>don't no dude not talk to a chick for 2 weeks without having
>something on reserve.

a part of me feels like why bother if he's not trying to do anything after he knows i'm interested in.

  

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morpheme
Charter member
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Wed Dec-10-14 12:53 PM

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31. "he hasn't worked himself back to you yet..."
In response to Reply # 19


  

          

you ain't gotta be offended
it's just, true.
hang out with him if you please
but he ain't vying for boyfriend status.
if he explains his absence by saying he'd been "stressed out" something like that?
don't trust him.
if he says he was working
he was. haha

  

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dew drops
Member since Sep 25th 2009
95 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:55 PM

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32. "you right. i'll do that."
In response to Reply # 31


          

  

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Fishgrease
Member since Feb 13th 2006
34442 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:45 PM

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20. "oh that was that old "situational I'm in"
In response to Reply # 8


  

          

close proximity-let me see if I can hit tonight" attraction. He wasn't trying to go home alone that evening, you ain't bite so he took his ball and went home. He lost nothing, not one dime or time.





>i met this guy through volunteering a some months ago. he
>recently started a new job that requires him a lot of
>traveling. so he's not part of the org anymore. we hang out
>together for the first time not too long ago with some of the
>volunteers we both know. he was all flirty, touchy-feely,
>which threw me off cause he has never acted this way towards
>me. a few days later we're talking on gchat, and i ask him
>about his behavior. he says he's attracted to me and wonders
>if i'm mad about his behavior. i tell him that i'm attracted
>to him, too, and that i'm not upset. this was about 2 weeks
>ago, and i haven't heard from him since.
>
>what gives?

---------------------------------------
blog: www.wonderfullyhorrible.blogspot.com
instagram: Fishgrease
twitter: wooly_caesar
Podcast www.soundcloud.com/circlegang

  

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dew drops
Member since Sep 25th 2009
95 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:48 PM

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23. "that's what i'm thinking."
In response to Reply # 20


          

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
69476 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:32 PM

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47. "yup, that dude is gone"
In response to Reply # 20


          

  

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8-bit
Member since Jan 12th 2010
10841 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:46 PM

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21. "What do you look like?"
In response to Reply # 8


  

          

>i tell him that i'm attracted
>to him, too, and that i'm not upset. this was about 2 weeks
>ago, and i haven't heard from him since.
>
>what gives?

---
http://twitter.com/logicalhood
http://instagram.com/hoodlogic

  

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dew drops
Member since Sep 25th 2009
95 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:48 PM

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25. "i'm cute."
In response to Reply # 21


          

  

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Case_One
Charter member
54687 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:48 PM

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24. "He just putting his place holder in. You'll be up next. "
In response to Reply # 8


          


.
.
.
"America, stop turning our Court Houses of Justice into Dens for Justified Murderers."

  

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MrThomas43423
Member since Jul 03rd 2002
67613 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:05 PM

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34. "he might be waiting to see you again"
In response to Reply # 8


  

          

sometimes its easier that way. especially in the beginning. that's physical attraction, which can lead to interest, which may unleash the flow of communication.

or not. people are weird.
---------------------------------------
it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

  

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MikaDanteBrown
Member since Oct 01st 2005
6962 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:42 PM

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16. "I just need a good Home Depot or Lowe's coupon. I've been"
In response to Reply # 0


          

searching high and low for a working code of at least 10%.

  

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Niq96st
Member since Jun 16th 2005
8396 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:48 PM

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22. "I don't know why this made me laugh"
In response to Reply # 16


  

          

Unless Home Depot/Loew's is a euphemism for something else lol

_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

  

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MikaDanteBrown
Member since Oct 01st 2005
6962 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 12:51 PM

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27. "I'm dead serious. My Mr. wants this welder for Christmas and I need"
In response to Reply # 22


          

coupons.

  

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nayaa
Member since Oct 06th 2009
20190 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:07 PM

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37. "The crappier I treat ‘em, the more they want me. Why?"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

This is something I used to experience way, way back. I thought we all grew up and were done with these childish games. Now that I’m casually dipping my toe in the pool I’m realizing we haven’t grown up at all.

I used to be really nice & honest with dudes. Y’know, treat ‘em like adults. But that doesn’t seem to work. So I switched it up and now can’t get ‘em offa me.

For example, I stopped talking to a dude I wasn’t interested in and he texted me asking to know why. I responded with “you talk too much. Like, it’s painful.” (something “old” me would NEVER have said/done) thinking that would shut him up for good and dude now won’t stop.

Wtf? Fa real?

~
IG: @fireysky

  

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NikaMandela
Charter member
35228 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:13 PM

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38. ""men love a challenge.""
In response to Reply # 37


          

  

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latenitemix
Charter member
51255 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:14 PM

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39. "lmao"
In response to Reply # 37


          

______
gnap.

  

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Monkey Genius
Member since Mar 04th 2005
8064 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:24 PM

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43. "You sure it ain't the other way around?"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

----------------------------------
I have a webcomic: www.watchthecomic.com

My webcomic has a page: www.facebook.com/watchyourheadcomic

  

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teefiveten
Member since Oct 02nd 2008
33019 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:25 PM

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44. "LOL"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          


>I used to be really nice & honest with dudes. Y’know, treat
>‘em like adults. But that doesn’t seem to work.

yeah it doesn't work.

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
69476 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:43 PM

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50. "we like the chase"
In response to Reply # 37


          

  

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Niq96st
Member since Jun 16th 2005
8396 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:57 PM

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55. "I love this. Men like mean! :("
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

I'm trying to be mean but it just doesn't come naturally.
But I am trying. People respond to that shit smh

_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

  

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teefiveten
Member since Oct 02nd 2008
33019 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 02:41 PM

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64. "yeah they do. it's hard. if you're rational and honest"
In response to Reply # 55


  

          

they think youre a robot
if youre mean they either think youre crazy or have some fire in you (which is the same thing to them)

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

  

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nayaa
Member since Oct 06th 2009
20190 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:09 PM

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67. "damn i've been called a robot recently"
In response to Reply # 64


  

          

weird

maybe i'm too logical with it

~
IG: @fireysky

  

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teefiveten
Member since Oct 02nd 2008
33019 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:18 PM

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70. "i told a guy we should stop dating"
In response to Reply # 67
Wed Dec-10-14 03:18 PM by teefiveten

  

          

he said i was rational and logical and i felt good about it for 2 seconds before i realized he wasn't being complimentary

he had no time for me and he was pissing me off
instead of screaming we had a rational convo

i guess he wanted the yells so he would know i like him

but i done told him numerous times that i liked him

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

  

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Niq96st
Member since Jun 16th 2005
8396 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:47 PM

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73. "Oh, he'll be back. He wants his yells."
In response to Reply # 70


  

          


_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
92693 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 04:03 PM

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80. "and she should reject that craziness"
In response to Reply # 73


  

          

if he does

dysfunctional people man
run teef run!
~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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8-bit
Member since Jan 12th 2010
10841 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 02:02 PM

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60. "I'd wager that you aren't mean to the men that you really like"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

I'm guessing that these are the men that you like:

>I used to be really nice & honest with dudes. Y’know, treat
>‘em like adults. But that doesn’t seem to work. So I
>switched it up and now can’t get ‘em offa me.


And these are the dudes that you don't really care for:

>For example, I stopped talking to a dude I wasn’t interested
>in and he texted me asking to know why. I responded with
>“you talk too much. Like, it’s painful.” (something
>“old” me would NEVER have said/done) thinking that would
>shut him up for good and dude now won’t stop.
>
>Wtf? Fa real?

---
http://twitter.com/logicalhood
http://instagram.com/hoodlogic

  

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nayaa
Member since Oct 06th 2009
20190 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 02:22 PM

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63. "nah, i'm universally nice"
In response to Reply # 60


  

          

it's just harder to be mean to guys i like

in fact, i haven't done that yet

~
IG: @fireysky

  

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SP1200
Charter member
20097 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 02:11 PM

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61. "because you attract masochists."
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

http://i54.tinypic.com/2j51hj4.jpg

  

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bonamie
Charter member
60263 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:09 PM

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68. "alot of men love to be abused. poor idiots."
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

-----------------------------------
we aint the two and i aint the one- lyte

  

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MrThomas43423
Member since Jul 03rd 2002
67613 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:56 PM

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76. "nice as in thoughtful and pleasant. or nice as in chipper and bubbly."
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

cause chipper and bubbly may not mesh with anyone. now i won't let anyone treat me like shit, but if you're trying to baby me and wipe my ass....i'd leave you alone as well.

i need to know what nice means in this situation.
---------------------------------------
it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

  

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nayaa
Member since Oct 06th 2009
20190 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 04:31 PM

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83. "thoughtful & pleasant, i like to think"
In response to Reply # 76


  

          

i'm not a chipper kinda gal

~
IG: @fireysky

  

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MrThomas43423
Member since Jul 03rd 2002
67613 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 04:40 PM

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86. "i have no idea what to say then. except welcome...."
In response to Reply # 83


  

          

you've entered the realm of the "nice guy". its the same thing. so whatever women feel about that nice guy who they don't treat right, it might be you reversed. not sure what that means for you, but thats all i got.
---------------------------------------
it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

  

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cgonz00cc
Member since Aug 01st 2002
32680 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 05:08 PM

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90. "ego. works for guys and girls."
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

Altho i am attracted to asshole girls

Birds of a feather i guess

  

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atruhead
Charter member
84994 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 07:34 PM

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92. "the chase, thinking you can be worn down"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

it took me 5 months of shitty treatment to get a kiss and another week to beat, but I guess I "won" even though I was left heartbroken 3 months later

2010 me was very dumb

  

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MizClayton
Member since Feb 22nd 2003
33309 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 08:04 PM

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93. "it's so true, man"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

so true

  

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SuiteLady
Member since Oct 19th 2004
15248 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:46 PM

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51. "Copy & Paste from CW: Earlier this year I went on several dates with thi..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

this guy who was really in to me right away.

I liked him, but I wasn't as enthused as he was. I mean he introduced me to his grandmother, 2 uncles, an aunt, his mother, his sister and his niece and nephew on our second date.

Now, anyone who knows me in real life knows I don't talk a lot, I rarely answer my phone, and I rarely respond to text right away.

Of course this bothered him and led him to ask me if I liked him at least once a week for the last three weeks of our 'situation.' Anytime I couldn't be reached, or wasn't interested in talking or going out his feelings were hurt. We are going to call this man "Drummer Boy"

Now there is this other situation, with "old man jenkins" that has been on and off for 5 years. I don't know how I could be so annoyed with "drummer Boy" but be just like him in my situation with "old man jenkins!"

He never answers my text. I don't know why I even text him, because I know he hates text messaging. The chances of him answering my call is less than 50% and the chance of him calling me back is 10%.

Yet I spend my nights distraught with worry - "are we off again?" "did I do something wrong?" "what did I say?" "what about the plans we made, are those off now?"

I totally understand "drummer boy," but that didn't make me change for him.

I should be able to understand "old man jenkins" since I been there, but that hasn't changed much either.

I don't understand how I can be on both sides of the situations and not get anything from it. Like, I should have learned something useful on each side, right?

I think Sepia hit the nail on the head with her reply in CW, but still... UGH!!!!!

♥ Inescapably Me ♥

"Love is never any better than the lover" Toni Morrison (The Bluest Eye)

  

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Wonderl33t
Member since Jul 11th 2002
21405 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 01:57 PM

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56. "The needier person usually is the one to be neurotic"
In response to Reply # 51


  

          

No rude-o, but is it really that mysterious that you'd act similarly to Drummer when you're put in his exact same situation?

Between you and Drummer, Drummer was the needy one. Between you and Jenkins, you're the needy one.

IMO, not answering communications is BS because it's usually a power trip. Especially if it's only out of habit and not for a real reason such as being busy.

I think these neurotic urges will come out no matter who you are in this situation. There is no cure for such neuroses. The best you can do is learn self-control and then it will be easier to handle. I've been there, myself. I was pretty needy and neurotic years ago when I started dating, but I figured out quickly that stuff doesn't fly too well, so I fought the urge to make that neurotic call or send that neurotic text, and it eventually became extremely manageable and it's no problem for me now. I still have the urges once in a while, but it's very easy to resist acting upon them.

______________________________
http://i.imgur.com/81XSukd.jpg

  

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BabySoulRebel
Charter member
19232 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 02:00 PM

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58. "i'm mad now"
In response to Reply # 51


  

          

so everything I say just goes in one ear and out the other huh?

here for dis.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
69476 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 02:20 PM

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62. "lol"
In response to Reply # 58


          

  

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morpheme
Charter member
94867 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:02 PM

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66. "i wonder if she listens to me too :-("
In response to Reply # 58


  

          

cuz i swear foe gawd i be trying to put her on game.

i be the "that isn't how any of this works" old commercial lady.

  

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legsdiamond
Member since May 05th 2011
69476 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 03:54 PM

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75. "a lot of people ask for advice but they already got the answers"
In response to Reply # 66


          

shit, half of them will give GREAT advice to the next person..

but won't apply it to their own situation.

  

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lfresh
Member since Jun 18th 2002
92693 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 04:07 PM

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81. "going to sit you and nayaa down"
In response to Reply # 51


  

          

yall messing with folk you have no ineterst in because you are bored
stop that
aint that much boredom in the world
do them the favor and stop contacting them

also do yourselves the favor and stop contacting the folk who are not as interested in you

~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

  

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Mahogany
Charter member
56697 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 04:56 PM

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87. "ugh I need help"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

So this guy I'm dating...we're kinda at this weird point where I feel like things should be moving forward.

We're both busy and there's distance involved (I'm in philly he's in ny) so we don't get to spend as much time together as I would like...idk if it's that he's lazy or just not interested anymore but there will be nights when he will hit me up talking about how bored he is and I'm just sitting there wondering why he won't ask me to go out or something

I talked to him last week and basically told him that I liked him a lot but he needed to step it up and he said he would and did, but he hasn't mentioned us doing anything or him coming to see me.

I'm the type that will only tell u once and just be out when I see things not changing. My friends keep telling me that I'm reading too much into it and to give it more time but I mean really...

I like dude and would prefer to just bounce before things go too deep. We talk just about every day so I know it will be hard at first, but im sure I'll get over it. A part of me just thinks that he's lazy (which he is lol) but it's like even if that's the case do I wanna deal with that?

I have no idea what my question is lol...I guess I'm wondering if I'm being played here.

BUY SOMETHING PLEASE ---> www.estherwoovintage.com

"people... please refrain from gnr'ing me. im an avid lol'er and am completely fine wit the service."

"Im just a dreamer,
turned true to life leaner...
Born to do good so others can be believers"

  

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Wonderl33t
Member since Jul 11th 2002
21405 posts
Wed Dec-10-14 06:35 PM

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91. "2 questions"
In response to Reply # 87


  

          


>I talked to him last week and basically told him that I liked
>him a lot but he needed to step it up and he said he would and
>did, but he hasn't mentioned us doing anything or him coming
>to see me.

How did he step it up if not making plans and putting out more effort? Or did you mean that he asserted that he had stepped it up already?

>I have no idea what my question is lol...I guess I'm wondering
>if I'm being played here.

You think he might be seeing someone else? Or what deception do you suspect
______________________________
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