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@geahuwine

is this legit?

i just hinted at my aversion to dating multiple people if i already like someone (him) and he more or less said he felt the same way. so we decided to take ourselves off the market and focus on each other. thats the only convo that's been had about it.

here for dis.

I wanna see you know who

@geahuwine

b. you'se a FOOL
c. don't make me cut you.

here for dis.

~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

https://33.media.tumblr.com/7c1e25a1cbecd57b30badf3c9c3d35c9/tumblr_n7nw2w1nPq1qfwa93o1_400.gif

here for dis.

but i think the main thing i want is security

its like taking yourself off the market for someone who's only halfway claimed you.

they can just walk away and be like, ok, never mind. the same way they could if they had claimed you. so whats the difference?

i guess i don't necessarily see such a big difference except in name.

what you're fine with doing.
halt.

it feels like limbo.

how long have you been seeing each other?

here for dis.

"I feel like we're in limbo" = "shit or get off the pot."

is it not better to be patient and wait for either outcome?

i know i can be neurotic, so this may not even be so bad.

it hasn't yet been a month. the exclusive convo happened during date 1. because we just clicked, for whatever that's worth.

do you even know his last name? His favorite song?

Why are you always having these convo's so early? It's not fair to you or him to operate like this.


Do you have any plants at your house/apt?

especially with two people who know what the fuck they want.

and there's no absolute right way of doing things.

in the meantime, i go with what feels right. that does not mean i don't have questions.

but you don't like them.

you just said men like a challenge down below and you are 100% correct

but do you apply this to your dating?

We love a challenge, we really do.

i actually don't have any misgivings about HIM. i just feel weird being in limbo.

i also don't think all men like challenges. i think men who are more mature, have real responsibilities, and know what they want are less likely to be about that chase shit.
someone being harder to get does not mean they're a better partner for you than someone who likes you from day 1.

anyway i'm just not that chick. if i like you, i like you and i'm not going to pretend otherwise. i think he likes that about me. it seems like we both like 'easy.'

if y'all were comfortable enough to broach the exclusivity subject on the first date, surely you should feel comfortable enough by now to ask that you both further outline what it is you both expect and want.

If you don't I would look at:
- do I really want what I say I want (a committed relationship I'm assuming)? -
- What do I require for me to feel like I am getting what I say I want?
- What have I heard being expressed as far as the other person's desire for what I want?
- Does their expressed interest level match mine?

here for dis.

and if you have, how long did that relationship last?

I'm a dude and we had that convo I wouldn't believe a word either of us said about being exclusive so soon.

not saying thats the situation with us, but it happens often enough for me not to think its out of the question.

I did however become exclusive AND committed after what was originally supposed to be a one night stand
it was the guy too that initiated it, I was gonna let shit rock as it appeared.
that lasted a total of 6 years combined.

here for dis.

thanks

here for dis.

it's legit.

TO ME

it's I don't wanna fuck wit nobody else but i CAN

@geahuwine

...i see it as, YOU can't get with anyone else, but i can opt out at any time...

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

..but it does mean he's gonna really try to follow em IMO

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

I can phuck other people until I find someone better than you....

but you have to be faithful to me.

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blog: www.wonderfullyhorrible.blogspot.com
instagram: Fishgrease
twitter: wooly_caesar
Podcast www.soundcloud.com/circlegang

________________________________________

"A Slew Of Empty Gas In My Tank" (C) Khujo Goodie

http://i.imgur.com/gFXu2he.jpg

http://bit.ly/1r3dl53

if you're committed, then when is your inexclusivity for? like what is that a open door to?
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it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

its a pre-relationship relationship.

yeah. its a pre relationship relationship...one of those necessary waste of times. like everyone else said its the relationship probationary period.
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it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

sorry
not sorry
what's the pt exactly?
if u like it though, we love it.

-----------------------------------
we aint the two and i aint the one- lyte

until you get married but maybe that's just me.

But if you are just dating someone exclusive and you meet someone you'd rather be with, wouldn't you break up with that person to be with the person you'd rather be with?


>is this legit?
>
>
>
>


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

http://blackpeopleonlocalnews.tumblr.com/

~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

He's saying "yeah, I'm not fucking anybody else but I wouldn't turn down other options if they were available."

<-><-><-><-><-><-><-><-><->
<-><-><-><-><-><-><-><-><->

Sorry

i met this guy through volunteering a some months ago. he recently started a new job that requires him a lot of traveling. so he's not part of the org anymore. we hang out together for the first time not too long ago with some of the volunteers we both know. he was all flirty, touchy-feely, which threw me off cause he has never acted this way towards me. a few days later we're talking on gchat, and i ask him about his behavior. he says he's attracted to me and wonders if i'm mad about his behavior. i tell him that i'm attracted to him, too, and that i'm not upset. this was about 2 weeks ago, and i haven't heard from him since.

what gives?

i am rather subtle
but for you a more direct approach may work.
you've got to remind him of you.

sum'n.

i feel like the ball is in his court now to do something cause i don't know what else to say to show that i am interested in him.

but the time might be to remind him.
nothing of the "you said" nature.
but maybe a cute photo with a sly caption.

or he loosening up tied ends

u one of many

don't no dude not talk to a chick for 2 weeks without having something on reserve.

@geahuwine

>u one of many
>
>don't no dude not talk to a chick for 2 weeks without having
>something on reserve.

a part of me feels like why bother if he's not trying to do anything after he knows i'm interested in.

you ain't gotta be offended
it's just, true.
hang out with him if you please
but he ain't vying for boyfriend status.
if he explains his absence by saying he'd been "stressed out" something like that?
don't trust him.
if he says he was working
he was. haha

close proximity-let me see if I can hit tonight" attraction. He wasn't trying to go home alone that evening, you ain't bite so he took his ball and went home. He lost nothing, not one dime or time.





>i met this guy through volunteering a some months ago. he
>recently started a new job that requires him a lot of
>traveling. so he's not part of the org anymore. we hang out
>together for the first time not too long ago with some of the
>volunteers we both know. he was all flirty, touchy-feely,
>which threw me off cause he has never acted this way towards
>me. a few days later we're talking on gchat, and i ask him
>about his behavior. he says he's attracted to me and wonders
>if i'm mad about his behavior. i tell him that i'm attracted
>to him, too, and that i'm not upset. this was about 2 weeks
>ago, and i haven't heard from him since.
>
>what gives?

---------------------------------------
blog: www.wonderfullyhorrible.blogspot.com
instagram: Fishgrease
twitter: wooly_caesar
Podcast www.soundcloud.com/circlegang

>i tell him that i'm attracted
>to him, too, and that i'm not upset. this was about 2 weeks
>ago, and i haven't heard from him since.
>
>what gives?

---
http://twitter.com/logicalhood
http://instagram.com/hoodlogic

.
.
.
"America, stop turning our Court Houses of Justice into Dens for Justified Murderers."

sometimes its easier that way. especially in the beginning. that's physical attraction, which can lead to interest, which may unleash the flow of communication.

or not. people are weird.
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it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

searching high and low for a working code of at least 10%.

Unless Home Depot/Loew's is a euphemism for something else lol

_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

coupons.

This is something I used to experience way, way back. I thought we all grew up and were done with these childish games. Now that I’m casually dipping my toe in the pool I’m realizing we haven’t grown up at all.

I used to be really nice & honest with dudes. Y’know, treat ‘em like adults. But that doesn’t seem to work. So I switched it up and now can’t get ‘em offa me.

For example, I stopped talking to a dude I wasn’t interested in and he texted me asking to know why. I responded with “you talk too much. Like, it’s painful.” (something “old” me would NEVER have said/done) thinking that would shut him up for good and dude now won’t stop.

Wtf? Fa real?

~
IG: @fireysky

______
gnap.

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I have a webcomic: www.watchthecomic.com

My webcomic has a page: www.facebook.com/watchyourheadcomic

>I used to be really nice & honest with dudes. Y’know, treat
>‘em like adults. But that doesn’t seem to work.

yeah it doesn't work.

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

I'm trying to be mean but it just doesn't come naturally.
But I am trying. People respond to that shit smh

_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

they think youre a robot
if youre mean they either think youre crazy or have some fire in you (which is the same thing to them)

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

weird

maybe i'm too logical with it

~
IG: @fireysky

he said i was rational and logical and i felt good about it for 2 seconds before i realized he wasn't being complimentary

he had no time for me and he was pissing me off
instead of screaming we had a rational convo

i guess he wanted the yells so he would know i like him

but i done told him numerous times that i liked him

*************************************
like.me
http://tinyurl.com/3z8486u

"if the children are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel its warmth." - african proverb

_______________________________
Maintain chill at all times.

if he does

dysfunctional people man
run teef run!
~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

I'm guessing that these are the men that you like:

>I used to be really nice & honest with dudes. Y’know, treat
>‘em like adults. But that doesn’t seem to work. So I
>switched it up and now can’t get ‘em offa me.


And these are the dudes that you don't really care for:

>For example, I stopped talking to a dude I wasn’t interested
>in and he texted me asking to know why. I responded with
>“you talk too much. Like, it’s painful.” (something
>“old” me would NEVER have said/done) thinking that would
>shut him up for good and dude now won’t stop.
>
>Wtf? Fa real?

---
http://twitter.com/logicalhood
http://instagram.com/hoodlogic

it's just harder to be mean to guys i like

in fact, i haven't done that yet

~
IG: @fireysky

http://i54.tinypic.com/2j51hj4.jpg

-----------------------------------
we aint the two and i aint the one- lyte

cause chipper and bubbly may not mesh with anyone. now i won't let anyone treat me like shit, but if you're trying to baby me and wipe my ass....i'd leave you alone as well.

i need to know what nice means in this situation.
---------------------------------------
it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

i'm not a chipper kinda gal

~
IG: @fireysky

you've entered the realm of the "nice guy". its the same thing. so whatever women feel about that nice guy who they don't treat right, it might be you reversed. not sure what that means for you, but thats all i got.
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it's true what they say...people are strange, when you're strangers.

not compassionate....only polite.

I am not like you at all and i cannot pretend.

Altho i am attracted to asshole girls

Birds of a feather i guess

it took me 5 months of shitty treatment to get a kiss and another week to beat, but I guess I "won" even though I was left heartbroken 3 months later

2010 me was very dumb

so true

this guy who was really in to me right away.

I liked him, but I wasn't as enthused as he was. I mean he introduced me to his grandmother, 2 uncles, an aunt, his mother, his sister and his niece and nephew on our second date.

Now, anyone who knows me in real life knows I don't talk a lot, I rarely answer my phone, and I rarely respond to text right away.

Of course this bothered him and led him to ask me if I liked him at least once a week for the last three weeks of our 'situation.' Anytime I couldn't be reached, or wasn't interested in talking or going out his feelings were hurt. We are going to call this man "Drummer Boy"

Now there is this other situation, with "old man jenkins" that has been on and off for 5 years. I don't know how I could be so annoyed with "drummer Boy" but be just like him in my situation with "old man jenkins!"

He never answers my text. I don't know why I even text him, because I know he hates text messaging. The chances of him answering my call is less than 50% and the chance of him calling me back is 10%.

Yet I spend my nights distraught with worry - "are we off again?" "did I do something wrong?" "what did I say?" "what about the plans we made, are those off now?"

I totally understand "drummer boy," but that didn't make me change for him.

I should be able to understand "old man jenkins" since I been there, but that hasn't changed much either.

I don't understand how I can be on both sides of the situations and not get anything from it. Like, I should have learned something useful on each side, right?

I think Sepia hit the nail on the head with her reply in CW, but still... UGH!!!!!

♥ Inescapably Me ♥

"Love is never any better than the lover" Toni Morrison (The Bluest Eye)

No rude-o, but is it really that mysterious that you'd act similarly to Drummer when you're put in his exact same situation?

Between you and Drummer, Drummer was the needy one. Between you and Jenkins, you're the needy one.

IMO, not answering communications is BS because it's usually a power trip. Especially if it's only out of habit and not for a real reason such as being busy.

I think these neurotic urges will come out no matter who you are in this situation. There is no cure for such neuroses. The best you can do is learn self-control and then it will be easier to handle. I've been there, myself. I was pretty needy and neurotic years ago when I started dating, but I figured out quickly that stuff doesn't fly too well, so I fought the urge to make that neurotic call or send that neurotic text, and it eventually became extremely manageable and it's no problem for me now. I still have the urges once in a while, but it's very easy to resist acting upon them.

______________________________
http://i.imgur.com/81XSukd.jpg

so everything I say just goes in one ear and out the other huh?

here for dis.

cuz i swear foe gawd i be trying to put her on game.

i be the "that isn't how any of this works" old commercial lady.

shit, half of them will give GREAT advice to the next person..

but won't apply it to their own situation.

yall messing with folk you have no ineterst in because you are bored
stop that
aint that much boredom in the world
do them the favor and stop contacting them

also do yourselves the favor and stop contacting the folk who are not as interested in you

~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

So this guy I'm dating...we're kinda at this weird point where I feel like things should be moving forward.

We're both busy and there's distance involved (I'm in philly he's in ny) so we don't get to spend as much time together as I would like...idk if it's that he's lazy or just not interested anymore but there will be nights when he will hit me up talking about how bored he is and I'm just sitting there wondering why he won't ask me to go out or something

I talked to him last week and basically told him that I liked him a lot but he needed to step it up and he said he would and did, but he hasn't mentioned us doing anything or him coming to see me.

I'm the type that will only tell u once and just be out when I see things not changing. My friends keep telling me that I'm reading too much into it and to give it more time but I mean really...

I like dude and would prefer to just bounce before things go too deep. We talk just about every day so I know it will be hard at first, but im sure I'll get over it. A part of me just thinks that he's lazy (which he is lol) but it's like even if that's the case do I wanna deal with that?

I have no idea what my question is lol...I guess I'm wondering if I'm being played here.

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