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Subject: "Experience the Hell That Is The Funeral: Mr Mech's Student Film" This topic is locked.
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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
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Sun Jul-02-06 11:37 PM

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"Experience the Hell That Is The Funeral: Mr Mech's Student Film"
Sun Jul-02-06 11:41 PM by Mr Mech

          

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=892917012&n=2

The Funeral: A comedy about a man's pursuit of the perfect funeral.

This is a special OKP: PTP event. Please don't share the film with anyone for numerous reasons, quality being the least of my concerns.

I would like to note that the H.264 compressor washed out the colors and they were washed out even more when Myspace imported it which I'm not happy about. Plus, even though it says Draft07 it's really the first real cut of the film. I plan to do a lot more with it before I consider it a final cut.

Anyway, I want any and all comments no matter how brutal and in return I'll share, through conversation, the trying ordeal I had as a student filmmaker making a monster flick. I'm looking forward to your comments.

Mech

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
Before diving in, let me ask this...
Jul 02nd 2006
1
Damn, you watched it that fast?
Jul 02nd 2006
2
As for your questions...
Jul 03rd 2006
6
      Okay, HERE'S a fuller commentary:
Jul 04th 2006
14
           If only my peers were as insightful and coherent as you are Longo...
Jul 05th 2006
15
           damn, I agree with all of your comments
Jul 07th 2006
29
IT'S THE BE-BOP TANGO!
Jul 02nd 2006
3
Dave, the writer, would be extremely impressed with that...
Jul 02nd 2006
4
nit-picking begins now
Jul 02nd 2006
5
RE: nit-picking begins now
Jul 03rd 2006
7
      RE: nit-picking begins now
Jul 03rd 2006
8
           I'm sorry if I seem touchy but...
Jul 03rd 2006
9
More...I need more opinions...
Jul 03rd 2006
10
Stick those credits at the end...
Jul 04th 2006
11
they do go on a little long
Jul 04th 2006
12
      I was worried about that...
Jul 04th 2006
13
Alright it's 4am and I'm tired but here goes.
Jul 05th 2006
16
Why have people flaked on my projects?
Jul 06th 2006
17
      RE: Why have people flaked on my projects?
Jul 08th 2006
32
RE: Experience the Hell That Is The Funeral: Mr Mech's Student Film
Jul 06th 2006
18
What did you have the film tranferred to?
Jul 06th 2006
19
      RE: What did you have the film tranferred to?
Jul 06th 2006
21
           did your school pay for the stock and transfer?
Jul 06th 2006
22
                RE: did your school pay for the stock and transfer?
Jul 07th 2006
24
                     What camera and lenses did you get?
Jul 07th 2006
26
                          RE: What camera and lenses did you get?
Jul 08th 2006
31
                               Did you go to a rental place in LA?
Jul 08th 2006
33
                                    RE: Did you go to a rental place in LA?
Jul 08th 2006
34
Bookmarked for tonight
Jul 06th 2006
20
I am the other director.
Jul 07th 2006
23
RE: I am the other director.
Jul 07th 2006
25
RE: Experience the Hell That Is The Funeral: Mr Mech's Student Film
Jul 07th 2006
27
I can build a sense of self-reflection, or I can just bring my films her...
Jul 07th 2006
28
kudos for going with a comedy
Jul 07th 2006
30

Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
86643 posts
Sun Jul-02-06 11:46 PM

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1. "Before diving in, let me ask this..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

...what was your intention with this film? What were you trying to do/say with this? Also, since you appear to be so unhappy with the film, what do you intend on changing in future drafts of the final cut?

I'll say without any further in-depth analysis (which I can type out in the next couple of days, when I'm not nearly so sleepy) that there is plenty of good groundwork here for an extremely interesting if nothing else short film. I'm curious as to the answers of my questions.

That being said, after seeing your film and Ryan's, I'm REALLY starting to think that I should go into acting.

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Sun Jul-02-06 11:49 PM

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2. "Damn, you watched it that fast?"
In response to Reply # 1


          

Mech

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Mon Jul-03-06 12:02 AM

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6. "As for your questions..."
In response to Reply # 1


          

>...what was your intention with this film? What were you
>trying to do/say with this?

Ultimately, the film was meant to be a fun, very off beat comedy that focused on questions like "What do you do when you're dead and bored?" and "What if there was a class system after death?". But, after the lead actress and the producer quit and there were only three people to crew the film, a lot was exchanged for simply getting it done. It truly pains me to say that because it violates a key principle of mine.

>Also, since you appear to be so
>unhappy with the film, what do you intend on changing in
>future drafts of the final cut?

I'm not unhappy with the film, it's far from what we envisioned in a lot of ways but I think it looks great, it has great performances and is a lot of fun to watch.

As for future drafts: the soundtrack will change a lot, there were some problems with a mic that need to be fixed, more folly sounds need to be added and I'll be doing a supervised transfer to bring more uniformity to the cinematography, as well as some cropping. Editing wise, I'm at somewhat of a loss. This draft was done in about two weeks when it should take several months. I need none UM student suggestions to get a more objective opinion.

>That being said, after seeing your film and Ryan's, I'm REALLY
>starting to think that I should go into acting.

Elaborate.

I'm really looking forward to what you have to say.

Mech

  

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Frank Longo
Member since Nov 18th 2003
86643 posts
Tue Jul-04-06 11:19 PM

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14. "Okay, HERE'S a fuller commentary:"
In response to Reply # 6


  

          

>>...what was your intention with this film? What were you
>>trying to do/say with this?
>
>Ultimately, the film was meant to be a fun, very off beat
>comedy that focused on questions like "What do you do when
>you're dead and bored?" and "What if there was a class system
>after death?". But, after the lead actress and the producer
>quit and there were only three people to crew the film, a lot
>was exchanged for simply getting it done. It truly pains me
>to say that because it violates a key principle of mine.

This is the number one thing I'd say you should work on: clarity. In terms of the actions and the dialogue, any ambiguity in terms of vague actor choices or unclear line readings, there's nothing you can do. However, I think that especially the dead-and-bored thing can read very well with the touch-ups you specified to the editing and the soundtrack.

The class system thing didn't read very well to me. I got that some people were more important than others, but it wasn't immediately clear upon people's entrances and the shots of the people/monsters who these people were in the class, how they relate to one another, how far this class system stretches, et cetera. When you said that in your comment, it puzzled me a bit, since I didn't really get that the first time I saw it. Upon a repeated viewing, I understand the intention, but there's a bit of a clarity issue. It is what it is in terms of what's actually on the film, but I'm willing to bet once you tinker around with it that you can bring that theme out somehow if you so choose. I won't suggest how, since you undoubtedly know more about filmmaking than me-- however, it's something that is worth exploring and as it currently stands is a bit fuzzy and lost.

The dead-and-bored thing is another very interesting thing, one I did understand ESPECIALLY at the beginning. My question from here I guess would be if you wanted to make ONE of the issues this film brings up (the dead-and-bored thing or the class-system thing), which would you want to be the one at the CENTER of the film? As it stands, I got that the guy was dead and bored, but then around the time that the hunched-over guy helps set up and the other monsters start entering, I got confused. Are these all his fellow rich friends? Why are they doing this for him? How do they relate to him? What does this have to do with the actions of a bored, dead man? I see upon second viewing that the actions begin to revolve a bit more around the class system-- however, this takes the immediate attention away from Ludvig, and how this funeral pleases or displeases him, how it cures his boredom. I would watch upon all re-jiggering how the momentum of the piece seems to switch, and even the style of the piece seems to switch around the time we get to the entraces (a montage which I will address in a minute). Again, in terms of the "how", that'd be up to you. But I found myself confused as to what this piece was trying to do or say, which is why I asked. Now that I know, I can tell you that what you're trying to do or say seems to vary, which causes confusion to the audience member (at least for me).

>
>>Also, since you appear to be so
>>unhappy with the film, what do you intend on changing in
>>future drafts of the final cut?
>
>I'm not unhappy with the film, it's far from what we
>envisioned in a lot of ways but I think it looks great, it has
>great performances and is a lot of fun to watch.
>
>As for future drafts: the soundtrack will change a lot, there
>were some problems with a mic that need to be fixed, more
>folly sounds need to be added and I'll be doing a supervised
>transfer to bring more uniformity to the cinematography,

What does this mean?

as
>well as some cropping. Editing wise, I'm at somewhat of a
>loss. This draft was done in about two weeks when it should
>take several months. I need none UM student suggestions to
>get a more objective opinion.
>

The eyeline thing that colonelk said is something that was a bit disorienting, but it's neither here nor there-- you've got on film what you've got on film. I personally preferred the cuts at a slower pace-- it added for me to the feel of melancholy and boredom that you said you were going for. The montage of entrances is a scene that strikes me as very odd. It's not clear right now to me what the scene is for other than to introduce the characters that are coming to the funeral and to show off the makeup (which is actually quite good, by the way). I understand it tries to establish the class system in a way, but when you combine the actions with the very obvious quick jumps forward in time and the soundtrack, which sounds like something out of a carnival scene in a silent film, I can't tell what the mood is supposed to be, what I'm supposed to intake. I can interpret for myself, but when I have monsters mixed with carnival silent film music mixed with jumps forward in time mixed with hammy expressions mixed with actions about bowing that I'm unsure of the meaning...you can see my confusion. Is it supposed to be funny or is it supposed to be "cool monsters" or is it supposed to maintain the humor of the melancholy feel of the bored dead? Right now the scene seems to be mixing and matching elements of all of these things. And of course, the audience doesn't want to be TOLD how to feel or how to intake this info. But when the pieces of the puzzle are to several different puzzles, it just ends up a bit garbled in tone and mood, you feel me? Again, this is something that I'm SURE can somehow be fixed in the editing room. But to me it's the least clear section of the film (at least, the section that is unclear that you can do something to fix).

>>That being said, after seeing your film and Ryan's, I'm
>REALLY
>>starting to think that I should go into acting.
>
>Elaborate.
>

Here's the thing about a lot of actors-- their intentions, both in the delivery of their lines and their physical gestures, are unclear. Here are some examples:

-- the owner of the funeral parlor I thought was the best actor of the bunch. A clear objective, and he was following it: even when I didn't know what he was thinking, it was clear HE knew what he was thinking, you know? However, during the bowing scene and that montage, he looked like he had been told to make faces at the monsters... it didn't seem to be motivated from what we knew of the character and how he carried himself. It went from professional to Look of Shock from 1930s Comedies (c). Again, I thought he was the best, but when he was scared, all of a sudden it was like Abbott and Costello Meets Frankenstein.

-- Ludvig was very consistent with his reactions, and seemed very motivated. However, upon the second viewing, he seemed to be playing the class-system angle and not really emphasizing at all the bored angle despite the indications in the dialogue towards boredom. As I said, I have very little problem with his protrayal, since it's very consistent. However, it's at times inconsistent with the piece as a WHOLE, since he brings a more dramatic flair, notsomuch any dark melancholy comedy to it. It's a very interesting performance to watch, and certainly the most consistent.

-- The hunchback guy... well, I got that he was subservient. But to me, I didn't know who he was, what he wanted, what he was thinking, et cetera. The problem isn't that I don't know WHAT he's thinking, the problem is I don't think he's thinking period. He looks like the director said, "Go there, do this, make this face."

The final commentary is the one that I always notice in student films, and it always gets to me. Inconsistencies, sure, I can deal. Performances that at time seem out-of-whack with the piece as a whole, sure, I can deal. But in this one and in Ryan's, I've seen performances that seemed to be totally physically motivated, as I call it, the go-here-do-this school of acting, where you follow blocking and put on faces, but you don't REALLY dive into it, you don't make everything that's going on upstairs what your character would have going on upstairs. That's why the best actors can have a shot of them thinking for 45 seconds, because the audience can follow the fact that he's thinking, he's hesitating, he's changed his mind, what is it that's running through his head now?, et cetera. Now, to be fair to you and Ryan, you don't need great actors to tell a great story. Many people had beef with an actor or two in Ryan's, and he's winning awards and shit. It's all about how the story gets told, the point of the existence of the piece, and how coherently the shit is put together at the end of the day. But damn if these things don't make me wanna find you fuckers and act in your films.


>I'm really looking forward to what you have to say.
>

All in all, you have a very interesting concept, and once the colors and shit are fixed, it will be very interesting to look at. The only thing I would look at in the editing room is the arc of the story, and how each stop, each shot, each line affects what the story is telling us at this point in the arc. Things like jiggering with the jump-cuts and the soundtrack will certainly help this a great deal. I won't tell you how, and I really look forward to the next draft of this, but once the clarity of the tone and the purpose (not what the purpose is necessarily, but that everything we are observing in the audience is shown to us FOR a purpose) are tweaked, I think you could have a very interesting first piece.

Keep us posted with how this is going.

Frank

My movies: http://russellhainline.com
My movie reviews: https://letterboxd.com/RussellHFilm/
My beer TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thebeertravelguide

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Wed Jul-05-06 12:09 AM

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15. "If only my peers were as insightful and coherent as you are Longo..."
In response to Reply # 14


          

...if only my professors were as well then I wouldn't feel like I'm spending a lot of money to rent equipment and buy film stock.

You've given me a lot to think about. So much so that I'm going to save and re-read your post; not only to ask follow up questions but also as a reference for future drafts. Seriously, thanks.

Mech

  

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DrNO
Charter member
25381 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 07:23 PM

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29. "damn, I agree with all of your comments"
In response to Reply # 14


  

          

_
http://youtube.com/watch?v=4TztqYaemt0
http://preptimeposse.blogspot.com/

  

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DarkStar
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Sun Jul-02-06 11:49 PM

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3. "IT'S THE BE-BOP TANGO!"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Sun Jul-02-06 11:51 PM

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4. "Dave, the writer, would be extremely impressed with that..."
In response to Reply # 3


          

Then he'd chew your ear off about how Zappa's widow is a bitch.

Mech

  

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colonelk
Member since Dec 10th 2002
5058 posts
Sun Jul-02-06 11:59 PM

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5. "nit-picking begins now"
In response to Reply # 0
Sun Jul-02-06 11:59 PM by colonelk

  

          

Inconsistent and odd framing. I'm guessing this was deliberate, but when you break the rules like that, unless you do it masterfully, it comes across as amateurish. For instance, why is the funeral director's head cut off?

Eyelines don't match.

Lighting issues. I'm sure the red on Asper's ear was thought to be a subtle touch on set, but it looks kind of silly. Other colored lighting elements are distracting. With a set this minimal, why not black and white?

Casting could have been better, but I'm sure you went with the best options at your disposal.

The shots never cut together to give us a coherent idea of the space the characters are in. I'm guessing this is to hide the incomplete set, but each shot looks entirely isolated from the others. No "film space" is created."

It's cute but slight. Do you really want to make Addams Family episodes?

--------

hell-below.com

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Mon Jul-03-06 12:17 AM

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7. "RE: nit-picking begins now"
In response to Reply # 5


          

>Inconsistent and odd framing. I'm guessing this was
>deliberate, but when you break the rules like that, unless you
>do it masterfully, it comes across as amateurish. For
>instance, why is the funeral director's head cut off?

It is deliberate odd framing basically because my shot list went out the window when someone at the school broke the wheels for the jib making it damn near impossible for two people to handle.

And, granted the framing seems odd, but I think the way I balanced the objects within the frame point to it being intentional.

>Eyelines don't match.

>Lighting issues. I'm sure the red on Asper's ear was thought
>to be a subtle touch on set, but it looks kind of silly. Other
>colored lighting elements are distracting. With a set this
>minimal, why not black and white?

Black and white is expensive to buy and process and would have depleted my film allotment. Besides, the absence of color would have given the audience even less to look at.

>Casting could have been better, but I'm sure you went with the
>best options at your disposal.

This is the only thing I believe is done spot on. A lot of people have complained about the theatrical acting but it was our intention from the beginning.

>The shots never cut together to give us a coherent idea of the
>space the characters are in. I'm guessing this is to hide the
>incomplete set, but each shot looks entirely isolated from the
>others. No "film space" is created."

This is another common complaint and one I agree with. I had planned a lot more coverage, but, again, that went out the window with my shot list and dwindling time.

>
>It's cute but slight. Do you really want to make Addams Family
>episodes?

Like I said, it's a first draft that's why I'm looking for comments. I'm not going to be a dick and attack the final sentence.

Mech

  

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colonelk
Member since Dec 10th 2002
5058 posts
Mon Jul-03-06 12:49 AM

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8. "RE: nit-picking begins now"
In response to Reply # 7
Mon Jul-03-06 12:56 AM by colonelk

  

          

>It is deliberate odd framing basically because my shot list
>went out the window when someone at the school broke the
>wheels for the jib making it damn near impossible for two
>people to handle.

That blows. A little camera movement would have gone a long way.


>Black and white is expensive to buy and process and would have
>depleted my film allotment. Besides, the absence of color
>would have given the audience even less to look at.

Last time I checked black and white was significantly cheaper to buy and only slightly more expensive to process (a couple cents per foot; obviously this depends on the lab). Not saying this film necessarily should have been B&W instead of color. But it's an option I think too many students discount.

It's hard to make B&W look ugly. It's very easy to make color look ugly.

>This is the only thing I believe is done spot on. A lot of
>people have complained about the theatrical acting but it was
>our intention from the beginning.

The problem wasn't the theatricality as much as the lack of assuredness. Apart from Clooney, who was spot on, the cast needed a little bit more energy, a little bit more commitment to their characters/caricatures. This is either casting or directing. I was going to give you the benefit of the doubt and say casting.

>This is another common complaint and one I agree with. I had
>planned a lot more coverage, but, again, that went out the
>window with my shot list and dwindling time.

Yeah, it happens. I don't know the particulars, so I won't make suggestions about shot selection. But a wide establishing shot is nice to have sometimes.

> Do you really want to make Addams
>Family
>>episodes?
>
>I'm not going to be a dick and attack the final
>sentence.

Sorry. I meant it in good humor.

--------

hell-below.com

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Mon Jul-03-06 08:39 AM

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9. "I'm sorry if I seem touchy but..."
In response to Reply # 8
Mon Jul-03-06 08:48 AM by Mr Mech

          

Thus far, meaning from people at school, I've recieved more criticism than critique...so to speak, all rhymes intended. I've been told over and over again what I "should" have done instead of being asked questions or given suggestions that will help me figure out how to make the project more enjoyable for future audiences.

At school, and I'm not saying this applies to you, the comments I've recieved from my peers (only one faculty member was willing to sit down and have an extended conversation about the film) are more about proving to themselves that they're a great filmmaker by proving that everyone else is an awful filmmaker. I'm sure you can understand how frustrating this is to a person who has spent years looking forward to joining an artist's community where everyone is more concerned about learning than postering.

If it feels that I was venting on you that's because I'm letting off steam that I can't at school due to, and it pains me to say this, politics. It's not that your comments aren't valid and grounded but they are disquieting reminders.

Ultimately, I have to say thank you for taking the time to watch the film closely enough that you can make articulate comments, but I'd also appecriate it if you could watch the film again with what I've said above in mind and help me make a film that's fun and enjoyable.

Mech

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
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Mon Jul-03-06 07:53 PM

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10. "More...I need more opinions..."
In response to Reply # 0


          

Mech

  

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truth0ne SGC
Member since Sep 25th 2003
38103 posts
Tue Jul-04-06 12:23 AM

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11. "Stick those credits at the end..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

...or at least have some images or something in the background behind the text.

  

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colonelk
Member since Dec 10th 2002
5058 posts
Tue Jul-04-06 01:10 AM

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12. "they do go on a little long"
In response to Reply # 11


  

          

They set a good mood--text plus music. But they go on a little long for a short film.

--------

hell-below.com

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Tue Jul-04-06 09:23 AM

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13. "I was worried about that..."
In response to Reply # 12


          

The reason I let them go on long is because I wanted to give everyone their own title card.

Do you guys think the individual cards are too long or should I double up some of the names and keep the cards at the same length? Or should I just leave most of them for the end?

Mech

  

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Ryan M
Member since Oct 21st 2002
43719 posts
Wed Jul-05-06 06:41 AM

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16. "Alright it's 4am and I'm tired but here goes."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I read the script awhile back and I didn't see any big changes (well actually the climax was cut down, for logistical purposes I'm sure)...what, if anything, was changed? It was awhile ago that I read it.

I think that you have a good idea here. Remember though, these films are exercises bro. Do your best, tell a story, but don't expect genius. Also, in reading through the other replies...I noticed you, again, had crew quit on you. Is this just coincidence? Are there flaky people in your school, or what? I understand all too well the politics involved with film school - so please elaborate on your experiences with regards to that.

Now back to the film...I really dug the lighting in the horned dude's speech (again I'm tired, I will go back and watch it but I'm trying to go for descriptions here). As someone said the film space is kinda...not there, but you did what you could. The framing at the beginning is jarring...I don't really understand the idea there. It seems to push you away from the characters rather than bring you in. Makeup wise, I think it was great. Um, let's see...how can you make it better...

...well, for starters, unlike a lot of student films, I do not think it was too long. However, there is a bit of ambuguity throughout, which is confusing, especially in the climactic moment. The acting was student filmish which is all good...if your intent was going for theatrics, then you got it (for the most part, I'm sure you know you're not going to get everything you want here). I just keep coming back to why your sets seem to go to hell last minute. I know that you probably planned out this shoot in great detail and, all things considered, you did hammer out a project in the face of adversity and that does need to be commended. Overall I wasn't exactly entertained by the film, although don't feel bad - I'm usually not by student films.

I think the moments in which things go very visual ie. the guests entering the funeral parlor - you really captured the essence of this project. Dark humor with these undertones of serious questions. But it's lost when things go back to lengthy, wordy dialog scenes that kinda drag. I'll write more later, but try and answer the questions I've got.

------------------------------

17x NBA Champions

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Thu Jul-06-06 12:52 AM

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17. "Why have people flaked on my projects?"
In response to Reply # 16


          

I've learned that the real question is why do people commit themselves to a project they don't want to see through its completion. I think it's very easy to want to be a filmmaker but it's way more complex and arduous than people think.

The producer who originally signed on to The Funeral had been spoiled with the idea that a student film producer didn't have to do more than organize some papers, arrange some meetings and order a few meals. But, as you know, being a producer requires taking on a lot of responsibility; not only a responsibility to get papers organized, arrange meetings and order food but a responisibility to make sure that the project succeeds so that a large group of people can feel proud of making a film. It's a lot of pressure that's more complicated than simply meeting a deadline and ultimately I think that's scary to a lot of people. I understand the hard work and focus this takes so that's why I never want to share the producing credits for my films even though I'm the one putting up the money.

Personally, I try to make everyone involved in the film feel invested in the project; meaning I take their ideas and their suggestions and try to make it clear to them that the project is developing and taking shape because of their input. So, when people drop out it really pains me because, to put it simply, I thought we were having a great time making a film we can be proud of and people can enjoy watching.

I think working on my projects is harder than working on the films of other people in my class and I think they're projects that are harder to make work with limited resources. But, as the head of the project, the Black Lion so to speak, I try to make it as easy as possible for my crew and cast to do their jobs and do them well.

Ultimately, I don't know why so many people are inclined to jump ship and I really don't understand why they would want to jump ship when it's not sinking.

Mech

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Sat Jul-08-06 02:22 AM

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32. "RE: Why have people flaked on my projects?"
In response to Reply # 17


          

It's crazy, cuz, when it comes down to it, you only have a few people committed commited, like, really there every day for a project for months on end. Usually on one to four people, and with only one you'll die, with two you hate each other, and with four people some feel left out!

Producing is rough and all encompassing...I have taken and not taken producing credits when I have always earned them, but I never want to be the primary producer.

What also trips me out is if I write and direct a film ultimately most of the artistry of the film rests with me then my dp, producer, actors, and editors, but on the set for a student shoot there are people such as the ac's, and the gaffers and that super pa that are absolutely indespensible for the whole thing! And getting them to commit without creative input or real return except experience trips me out.

Goddamn, I need to write and make another film already!

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Thu Jul-06-06 01:45 AM

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18. "RE: Experience the Hell That Is The Funeral: Mr Mech's Student Film"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I am a student film maker, just graduated from San Diego State University. So perhaps I will split the difference between objective non-film student viewer, and symphatetic fellow film student.

O.K. I am trying to think what I would be proud of if I made this film.

While non film students automatically crush the skills of our free actors I feel the acting is consistent and very good for a student film here. Kudos to you as a director.

The tone of the film, the story, the events, the feel, are all interesting.

The credits and the music are excellent.

Now what I don't like/feel:

Well, some of the oddball costumes are just over the edge for me and look a little low budget.

The transition from second to third act lost me.

The cinematography...the lighting is a little bland and over-gelled at times. The production design is poor...I am just seeing a yellow lit wall over and over again. I assume a bland set. Perhaps a location would have been nicer, because it's tough to find good production designers at this level. The angles are alright though.

As a director you always want more coverage but I know how it goes.

You can fix sound with editing, re-dubbing etc.

It's a good film. Interesting, funny, macabre, well acted, written and directed.

Good job.

I would put my film up here but first need to get a higher quality version. My films were shot in super 35 but on the internet look much more downgraded than yours. I don't understand technology!

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Thu Jul-06-06 09:23 AM

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19. "What did you have the film tranferred to?"
In response to Reply # 18


          

And what have you been editing on?

Mech

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Thu Jul-06-06 09:54 PM

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21. "RE: What did you have the film tranferred to?"
In response to Reply # 19


          

my last two have been shot in super 35 and transferred to HD, edited on Final cut pro.

My producer tranferred the film onto myspace and the like but it looks retchid. On a DVD player it looks good, but actually not what 35 HD should look like (that's my prior editor's fault, my latest looks great)...

If and when I truly finish finish these things (menu's titles, get out the glitches etc.) i'll post links!

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
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Thu Jul-06-06 10:50 PM

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22. "did your school pay for the stock and transfer?"
In response to Reply # 21


          

Mech

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 02:30 AM

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24. "RE: did your school pay for the stock and transfer?"
In response to Reply # 22


          

r u kidding?

No way...

I guess that would lead to this...

The first film is five minutes with credits and the budget ran 1700 and rising (fesitvals and copies)

The second film has run just under or just over 3000 and counting and it more like eight minutes.

We got a spectacular deal on the camera and package...400 the first time for four days? and free the second time for about five or six days.

All u gotta pay for is copies (paper) food, stock, and transfer, but u already are aware of that. Got everything and everyone else for free!


What was your budget, what did u shoot?

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 08:09 AM

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26. "What camera and lenses did you get?"
In response to Reply # 24


          

Did the lights come from school? What about your tripod and head?

Mech

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Sat Jul-08-06 02:16 AM

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31. "RE: What camera and lenses did you get?"
In response to Reply # 26


          

I went to San Diego State University.

Every light we used, the dolly, bounce cards, reflector kits, c-stands, flags, etc. was all school equipment.

The camera rental was unbelievable because it came with the whole package! That is, lenses and all...

The tripod as well though that was a little fucked...

My favorite toy was the director's eyepiece!

The first film I shot the video tap was shot, the second one I had it after the first day of shooting.

Basically the unbelievable camera package deal saved us at least five hundred to a thousand each time and thus made it possible to shoot on 35.

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
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Sat Jul-08-06 11:22 AM

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33. "Did you go to a rental place in LA?"
In response to Reply # 31


          

Mech

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Sat Jul-08-06 02:18 PM

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34. "RE: Did you go to a rental place in LA?"
In response to Reply # 33


          

Sorry I should have been clear,
no way in hell any rental place in LA would give us this deal. One of our Prof.'s owns his very own thrity five mm camera, fully equiped with lenses and everything you need (you can't change shutter speed and you can only shoot in 24 fps but it's a super 35mm camera) so he gives ridiculous deals to us. If he likes you and you don't fuck up his camera package ( a rarity but we have been good ) he gives you ridiculous deals.

To get nitpicky it's an older camera and some have dissed his lenses but they can drop the few thousand dollars extra, I'll take his package...of course now that I'm graduated we'll see what I do!

  

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tappenzee
Member since Sep 28th 2002
19839 posts
Thu Jul-06-06 04:02 PM

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20. "Bookmarked for tonight"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Regardless what I think of it later, congrats on beginning and finishing a project of this magnitude. A lot more than I could say for myself.

  

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thesignpostdrafter
Member since Jan 23rd 2004
381 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 01:14 AM

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23. "I am the other director."
In response to Reply # 0
Fri Jul-07-06 01:21 AM by thesignpostdrafter

          

I just saw this edit of the film for the first time like everyone else. Changes I would want to test out:

Cut out some people's entrances.
Cut out all of the Afro scientist man's lines.
Cut out parts of the Count's speech
Cut out everything relating to Jenny. It just doesn't work.
Instead of the funeral getting out of hand because of Jenny interrupting, it should instead get out of hand simply because Silkline gets beyond freaked out by the monsters.
Add in a shot of all the monsters' faces (that you guys haven't seen yet) and put the sound of Silkline's "No No No" over the shot.

I think you could maybe even add narration - make it like a dark storybook feeling kind of children's story.
Abandon the original story almost completely and make a new story using shots we have, and add a voice/sound for masked ghostfaced man.
Maybe keep cutting to ghost-faced man: he can be a tormentor of the vampire (Asper).
Add sound of monsters breathing differently and let that underscore the Count's speech. Let the sound of the monsters breathing build.

You should definitely use the close up of the eyeball on the table first. It's insignificant introducing that in the wide shot.
It cuts too quickly to the eyeball on the table. We need a few more beats of Silkline reading or ideally reacting to the monster's arrival- if we even shot that.

That's all I can think of right now.
*****************************

  

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Colin
Member since Apr 29th 2005
84 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 02:32 AM

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25. "RE: I am the other director."
In response to Reply # 23


          

this sounds very much like a good suggestion...


You should definitely use the close up of the eyeball on the table first. It's insignificant introducing that in the wide shot.
It cuts too quickly to the eyeball on the table. We need a few more beats of Silkline reading or ideally reacting to the monster's arrival- if we even shot that.



that part didn't work well as it is now.

  

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Shawn Maxam
Member since Jan 28th 2004
809 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 05:30 PM

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27. "RE: Experience the Hell That Is The Funeral: Mr Mech's Student Film"
In response to Reply # 0


          

Well I want to say kudos for even getting this project done especially since reading the post it seems you had alot of obstacles to overcome.

It looked good and alot better than alot of student films or videos I have seen.

The acting was decent to good. The funeral director was the best actor while everyone else seemed ok but no one ruined the film experience for me-lol.

In its description the film said comedy and humor but I didn't find it very funny it was more weird and offbeat than anything.

I agree with Longo about the clarity issue. I am not really sure what the film is trying to say. Even if it is saying nothing then I guess through editing or music or whatever that can be conveyed more
clearly.

I like the opening and closing music and credit sequence.
I like your idea. I think it's interesting.

I was confused by the montage of monsters/dead people and when the funeral director was being bounced up and down what did that mean if anything.

I guess when you are reworking the film you can just edit it in a way where every shot is essential to moving the narrative foward and is also revelvant to conveying the point of the short.

Good luck and don't worry about the people at your school it seems most artists are better at trying to be an artist than actually being one. Also when I was going to school (graduated w/ a degree in jazz studies) almost everyone was pretty bad at giving positive criticism.

I think the best you can do is develop a strong sense of self-reflection and use that to critique yourself in the most objective manner possible.

Just ask yourslef what are your goals and if your art in its current form or quality is helping you achieve it.

Aight, Peace.

My book of poems The Starving Artist: http://www.lulu.com/content/paperback-book/the-starving-artist/6151056

  

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Mr Mech
Member since Jul 02nd 2002
8373 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 05:48 PM

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28. "I can build a sense of self-reflection, or I can just bring my films her..."
In response to Reply # 27
Fri Jul-07-06 05:49 PM by Mr Mech

          

Thanks for the good criticism, I'm going to hold onto it.

Mech

  

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DrNO
Charter member
25381 posts
Fri Jul-07-06 07:36 PM

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30. "kudos for going with a comedy"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

although the whole gothic thing isn't really something I'm partial to. It does allow you to be showy and that's cool.
I'll echo the comments about the framing. I can tell it's intentional but that doesn't make it effective. You might be able to make it feel a little more conventional with Final Cut.
It does go awry during the second half. It's hard to figure out where the drama is coming from during that eulogy. Like Franko said, we don't really know who these people are. Especially when it seems to be about how bizarre the proceedings are to the funeral director up until then, and that seems more interesting seeing as the funeral director gives the best performance.

_
http://youtube.com/watch?v=4TztqYaemt0
http://preptimeposse.blogspot.com/

  

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