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Subject: "DA TRUTH" This topic is locked.
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QUEENET

Wed Jan-30-02 04:07 PM

  
"DA TRUTH"


          

I WANT TO KNOW HOW DO SOME OF YOU THINK ABOUT PEOPLE DATING OUT OF THERE RACE

  

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Topic Outline
Subject Author Message Date ID
RE: DA TRUTH
moshe
Jan 30th 2002
1
That special someone
Jan 30th 2002
2
      RE: That special someone
Feb 02nd 2002
10
      race does not equal culture
Feb 03rd 2002
25
      .. and he's an islander! n/m
Feb 03rd 2002
30
      You haven't thought about it
Feb 03rd 2002
34
      LOVE is a choice
Feb 04th 2002
62
      powerful observation
Feb 04th 2002
69
      Seriously.....
Feb 04th 2002
79
      You're Way Off Base
Feb 04th 2002
83
           Hon, I have 5 siblings that are black/white mixed
Feb 04th 2002
92
                RE: Hon, I have 5 siblings that are black/white mixed
Feb 04th 2002
94
                I can't turn him into anything
Feb 04th 2002
100
                     too simplified
Feb 04th 2002
107
                          he put his personal business out there
Feb 04th 2002
109
                               RE: he put his personal business out there
Feb 04th 2002
110
                                    Looking for an excuse n/m
Feb 04th 2002
111
                RE: Hon, I have 5 siblings that are black/white mixed
Feb 04th 2002
99
                well it depends on how you define black
Feb 04th 2002
104
                     RE: well it depends on how you define black
Feb 04th 2002
105
                          Its what the push for new catergories is for!
Feb 04th 2002
106
                               Mixing is Not the Problem
Feb 04th 2002
112
                                    Brotha please..its clear
Feb 04th 2002
114
                                         Stop it
Feb 05th 2002
126
                                         Yes, daddy ! - )
Feb 05th 2002
127
                                         I'll assume that
Feb 05th 2002
149
                                         who's fault is it?
Feb 05th 2002
130
                                         hon I have 5 "biracial" siblings
Feb 05th 2002
137
                                              if i love someone,
Feb 05th 2002
141
                                                   If you loved Christianity, it would
Feb 06th 2002
155
                                                        true, but that depends
Feb 06th 2002
165
                                                             If you truly believe Jesus is God
Feb 06th 2002
171
                                                                  ..to you!
Feb 06th 2002
178
                                         apples and cucumbers
Feb 05th 2002
136
                                              By your logic Britney Spears is black
Feb 05th 2002
138
                                                   i'm using YOUR logic
Feb 05th 2002
139
                                                   my thoughts on this
Feb 05th 2002
143
                                                   RE: By your logic Britney Spears is black
mr_tim
Feb 06th 2002
150
                                                        What problems?
Feb 06th 2002
156
                                                             Of course you have problems
Feb 06th 2002
160
                                                                  Sweetie you be real
Feb 06th 2002
172
                                                                       A Perfect Illustration
Feb 06th 2002
182
                                                                       Yeah logic!
Feb 06th 2002
186
                                                                       actually i simply confused you with another poster
Feb 06th 2002
187
                Look
Feb 04th 2002
113
                Are you black?
Feb 04th 2002
115
                     RE: Are you black?
Feb 04th 2002
116
                     Hon, I'm past my 20s
Feb 05th 2002
128
                          such a great point:
Feb 05th 2002
129
                          i love u
Feb 05th 2002
134
                          look at your vocab
Feb 05th 2002
142
                          It's interesting.....
Feb 05th 2002
145
                               M2 please
Feb 06th 2002
158
                                    RE: M2 please
Feb 06th 2002
161
                                         Clearing up this confusion
Feb 06th 2002
173
                                              the thing is
Feb 06th 2002
176
                                              How is this possible?
Feb 06th 2002
177
                                                   RE: How is this possible?
Feb 06th 2002
181
                                              Empirical Data
Feb 06th 2002
190
                                                   Values and Options
Feb 07th 2002
199
                                                        RE: Values and Options
Feb 07th 2002
205
                     RE: Are you black?
QUEENET
Feb 05th 2002
146
                Nahysma been on point
Toya
Feb 05th 2002
140
                     RE: Nahysma been on point
QUEENET
Feb 05th 2002
147
                          misunderstanding nahymsa
Feb 08th 2002
219
                               People Understand her just fine,....
Feb 09th 2002
223
                                    hush
Feb 09th 2002
226
      Love does conquer all
Feb 04th 2002
93
           Something else to consider
Feb 04th 2002
96
                nothing stops them
Feb 04th 2002
97
                white men marry outside their race...
Feb 04th 2002
101
                     RE: white men marry outside their race...
Feb 05th 2002
119
      RE: race does not equal culture
Feb 05th 2002
118
      yeah dude
Feb 04th 2002
98
It's their preference
Jan 30th 2002
3
RE: Peep Game
Jan 30th 2002
4
RE: Peep Game/IPLAYDAORGAN
QUEENET
Feb 02nd 2002
8
RE: Peep Game
Feb 02nd 2002
18
RE: Peep Game
Feb 03rd 2002
27
Word,
Feb 03rd 2002
40
RE: Peep Game
Feb 05th 2002
120
i don't care what any one else does...
Jan 30th 2002
5
If you believe in Soul Mates.
Jan 30th 2002
6
RE: If you believe in Soul Mates.
Feb 02nd 2002
14
      RE: If you believe in Soul Mates.
Feb 02nd 2002
16
Race = sub-species.
Jan 30th 2002
7
RE: Race = sub-species.
QUEENET
Feb 02nd 2002
9
      thanks for sharing n/m
Feb 03rd 2002
31
My ideals are changing
Feb 02nd 2002
11
That's all that matters......
Feb 02nd 2002
20
That's not the assumption
Feb 03rd 2002
21
okay......
Feb 03rd 2002
22
      Not the same thing
Feb 03rd 2002
48
           RE: Not the same thing
Feb 03rd 2002
51
RE: That's all that matters......
Feb 03rd 2002
24
      getting there myself...
Feb 04th 2002
61
           Already There......
Feb 04th 2002
86
                damn
Feb 04th 2002
89
That almost happened to me once
Feb 03rd 2002
47
RE: That almost happened to me once
Feb 04th 2002
56
i read that in this month's essence
Feb 04th 2002
57
      that's what worries me
Feb 04th 2002
65
      europeans
Feb 04th 2002
67
           believe me
Feb 04th 2002
70
           i've heard it a lot too
Feb 04th 2002
75
                lol yeah...
Feb 04th 2002
80
                     i'm always amazed
Feb 04th 2002
81
           Depends.....
Feb 04th 2002
82
                as yr relationship progresses
Feb 04th 2002
87
                     RE: as yr relationship progresses
Feb 04th 2002
90
                          clarification
Feb 05th 2002
117
                          Don't dispute my reality
Feb 05th 2002
148
                               RE: Don't dispute my reality
Feb 06th 2002
152
                                    europe?
Feb 06th 2002
153
                                         uk, france, spain
Feb 06th 2002
154
                          europeans
Feb 05th 2002
133
      Methinks....
Feb 04th 2002
88
      MESSAGES
Feb 05th 2002
122
           typos
Feb 05th 2002
123
           RE: MESSAGES
Feb 06th 2002
193
      RE: i read that in this month's essence
Feb 04th 2002
95
hmmm
Feb 04th 2002
68
well
Feb 05th 2002
132
      got u
Feb 06th 2002
157
Sounds as if
Feb 04th 2002
77
if this is directed at me
Feb 05th 2002
125
RE: That almost happened to me once
Feb 04th 2002
108
you're funny
Feb 05th 2002
124
      RE: you're funny
Feb 08th 2002
207
RE: That almost happened to me once
Feb 05th 2002
135
RE: My ideals are changing
Feb 10th 2002
230
doesnt matter...
Cocaine_Soul
Feb 02nd 2002
12
*typo*
Cocaine_Soul
Feb 02nd 2002
13
      perfecty fine with me
Feb 02nd 2002
15
      to each his/her own
Feb 02nd 2002
17
           and contrary
Feb 08th 2002
208
                RE: and contrary
Feb 08th 2002
213
                     if so,
Feb 08th 2002
215
                     RE: if so,
Feb 08th 2002
217
                          RE: if so,
Feb 09th 2002
221
                               RE: if so,
Feb 09th 2002
222
                                    RE: if so,
Feb 09th 2002
225
                                         RE: if so,
Feb 09th 2002
227
                                              RE: if so,
Feb 09th 2002
228
                                                   RE: if so,
Feb 09th 2002
229
                     or how about
Feb 08th 2002
216
      RE: *typo*
Feb 02nd 2002
19
           RE: *typo*
Cocaine_Soul
Feb 03rd 2002
44
it's suicide.
Feb 03rd 2002
23
huh?
Feb 03rd 2002
29
      correction
Feb 03rd 2002
32
      RE: huh?
Feb 03rd 2002
33
           RE: huh?
Feb 03rd 2002
37
                RE: huh?
Feb 03rd 2002
39
                     REPEAT THIS!
Feb 04th 2002
60
RE: DA TRUTH
Feb 03rd 2002
26
how am i gonna perpetuate the pale face?
Feb 03rd 2002
28
RE: The choice is yours
Feb 03rd 2002
35
      why in the devil...
Feb 03rd 2002
36
           THA ORIGINAL
QUEENET
Feb 03rd 2002
38
           RE: THA ORIGINAL
Feb 03rd 2002
42
           i don't date
Feb 08th 2002
209
           RE: why in the devil...
Feb 03rd 2002
41
                bpp and malcolm got soft...
Feb 03rd 2002
43
                     RE: bpp and malcolm got soft...
Feb 03rd 2002
45
                          new jack blaks is soft too...
Feb 03rd 2002
46
                          RE: bpp and malcolm got soft...
Feb 03rd 2002
49
                               martyrdom ain't help nobody.
Feb 03rd 2002
50
                               RE: martyrdom ain't help nobody.
Feb 08th 2002
214
                               RE: bpp and malcolm got soft...
Feb 04th 2002
58
Can people......
Feb 03rd 2002
52
!!!!
Feb 04th 2002
64
RE: Can people......
Feb 05th 2002
121
RE: Can people......
Liquescent
Feb 06th 2002
151
RE: DA TRUTH
skaboy718
Feb 03rd 2002
53
been thinkin
Feb 04th 2002
54
RE: been thinkin
Feb 04th 2002
55
damn good point
Feb 04th 2002
71
This again?
Feb 04th 2002
59
yeah well u know
Feb 04th 2002
72
      i donno
Feb 04th 2002
73
      that's why i'm here
Feb 04th 2002
85
      Read #62
Feb 04th 2002
74
IF...
Feb 04th 2002
63
!!!!
Feb 04th 2002
66
      RE: !!!!
Feb 04th 2002
76
           RE: !!!!
Feb 06th 2002
163
RE: DA TRUTH
Feb 04th 2002
78
ICE-T made it very clear ...
Feb 04th 2002
84
i'll say it like this
Feb 04th 2002
91
RE: i'll say it like this,read this shit and respond
Osun
Feb 04th 2002
102
OKAY
QUEENET
Feb 04th 2002
103
      yea
Feb 05th 2002
144
      Question
Feb 06th 2002
167
           lol
Feb 06th 2002
180
i don't have a problem..
Feb 05th 2002
131
WHAT IS THE BEEF?!!
Feb 06th 2002
159
The beef is
Feb 06th 2002
162
      Message 92
Feb 06th 2002
164
      Are you kidding?
Feb 06th 2002
166
      RE: Are you kidding?
Feb 06th 2002
174
      RE: Message 92
Feb 06th 2002
191
      Examples Please
Feb 06th 2002
168
      see #166 for examples n/m
Feb 06th 2002
169
           RE: see #166 for examples n/m
Feb 06th 2002
175
      My response
Feb 06th 2002
170
           One more time
Feb 06th 2002
179
           Overrated, yes
Feb 06th 2002
185
                RE: Overrated, yes
Feb 06th 2002
194
                     If Sally became a doctor when she could've
Feb 07th 2002
198
                          all i have to say is
Feb 07th 2002
200
                          perhaps,
Feb 08th 2002
210
           my response
Feb 06th 2002
184
           Not really my place to respond...
Feb 06th 2002
188
                thank you
Feb 06th 2002
189
                Excellent.
Feb 06th 2002
192
                If you valued making money
Feb 07th 2002
197
                     Package is the operative word...
Feb 07th 2002
201
                     RE:FUNNY......
Feb 07th 2002
203
                     see #199
Feb 07th 2002
204
                          Okay, fair enough...
Feb 07th 2002
206
                     is it healthy
Feb 08th 2002
211
                          ding ding ding
Feb 08th 2002
218
inter-minority dating?
Feb 06th 2002
183
what about inter ethnic group dating?
Feb 06th 2002
195
bad for all involved.
Feb 09th 2002
224
RE: DA TRUTH
samocrowncopywrite
Feb 06th 2002
196
The real truth is...
Feb 07th 2002
202
Steppin into the fray
Feb 08th 2002
212
RE: Steppin into the fray
Feb 08th 2002
220

moshe

Wed Jan-30-02 04:30 PM

  
1. "RE: DA TRUTH"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I don't see a problem with it. We're all human beings. On a genetic level, we're all the exact same. I mean, if you're looking for that "special someone", why limit yourself to one racial group. I mean the woman I end up marrying could be Black, White, Asian, Latin, or Arab. It doesn't matter to me as long as we can see eachother as people, not as skin colours.

  

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k_orr
Charter member
80197 posts
Wed Jan-30-02 04:39 PM

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2. "That special someone"
In response to Reply # 1


  

          

Is not going to understand me and my culture.

And if that sorta thing is important, I must stay within my culture to find someone suitable.

peace
k. orr

http://breddanansi.tumblr.com/

  

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Ximo
Charter member
351 posts
Sat Feb-02-02 10:30 AM

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10. "RE: That special someone"
In response to Reply # 2


          

>Is not going to understand me
>and my culture.

Why not? unless you're some psychadelich monster from neptune, i think any human could understand you and maybe even your culture.. at least if you let them

But if you don't want to, fine!

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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islander
Charter member
118 posts
Sun Feb-03-02 09:27 AM

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25. "race does not equal culture"
In response to Reply # 2


          

Culture and race are not inherently linked. I doubt you would have as much in common with someone of the same racefrom a different part of the world as you would with someone of a different race from your same country, area, city, etc. I don't understand how people can get all caught up in not dating out of their race, seems kind of naive and closed off to me.

  

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Ximo
Charter member
351 posts
Sun Feb-03-02 10:25 AM

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30. ".. and he's an islander! n/m"
In response to Reply # 25


          


I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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k_orr
Charter member
80197 posts
Sun Feb-03-02 11:23 AM

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34. "You haven't thought about it"
In response to Reply # 25


  

          

It's naive to think that love conquers all.

one
k. orr



http://breddanansi.tumblr.com/

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:19 AM

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62. "LOVE is a choice"
In response to Reply # 34


          

People like to pretend it isn't but it is.

Funny how nobody's soulmate ever is the homeless person in the gutter. On a routine & regular basis people CHOOSE to allow people in, choose to accept certain behaviors & types & while rejecting others. If you choose someone outside of your ethnicity & culture then you're making a clear annoucement of what what you're priorities are & what's important to you.


you = speaking generally, of course

  

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guerilla_love
Charter member
8273 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:43 AM

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69. "powerful observation"
In response to Reply # 62


          

==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:33 AM

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79. "Seriously....."
In response to Reply # 62


          

....people create fantasies in their head as to who they'll fall in love with, they then fall in love with whomever fits that discription the closest.......as opposed to basing it on who the person truly is.

....what's especially funny is that people date the same person over and over again.....and most of those relationships fail.


Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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The Real
Charter member
13847 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:00 AM

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83. "You're Way Off Base"
In response to Reply # 62


  

          

I understand some people have strong feelings about this topic but to identify somebody's idealogy to be directly related to the race of their spouse couldn't be further from the truth.

I'm black, went to an HBCU, and NEVER thought that I would even marry anybody that wasn't black. Well, I was wrong. In April I will be marrying a white female.

Now what does this say about my idealogy? Nothing. Should my views be less valuable than a black male who marries a black female or a white male that marries a white female and so on. No. That's the problem with society today, everybody is so caught up on apperance that they ignore happiness.


My diatribe is over!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:56 AM

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92. "Hon, I have 5 siblings that are black/white mixed"
In response to Reply # 83


          

So don't get it twisted, I know all about people making personal choices for their own "happiness". Its really quite simple though:

When you choose your mate, you decided that her being black was NOT a priority. If it were, she would be. What does that say about you? That you have decided that having a black mother raise your children is not important, that having a black woman by your side is not important, that making more black babies is not important..amongst other things.... I could go on.

Do what you want but don't act like your choices aren't saying something about what you value. If you valued a black woman in your life, as your mate, you would have one. Especially when we're outnumbering you guys in some places like 12 to 1. Question: do you think you'd be equally as able to "fall in love" with a 500 lb woman as this white girl?

  

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truasana
Charter member
467 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 12:05 PM

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94. "RE: Hon, I have 5 siblings that are black/white mixed"
In response to Reply # 92


          

I feel a need to step in for this man. I don't think he said to himself, "I don't care about black women and I also don't care about reprodusing the black race." It sounds more like he made a prioriry to fall in love by being open to somebody. I'm sure he does care about his black women and his black race. I think that's pretty low to try and turn someone into an uncle tom when they're just livin openminded and learning, unlike some other people on this board.

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 02:09 PM

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100. "I can't turn him into anything"
In response to Reply # 94


          

As I said, I have mixed siblings, I never claimed it made my parent an uncle Tom or Aunt Jemima.

BUT if you say you love Pepsi, why buy Coke. Its not science.

Your choices indicate what you want in your life. If he wanted a black woman, he would have one.

C'mon how you gonna diss the ?uestion like that, of course he wasn't a Fat Boy. Now previous to Roots life, Quest did appear on television. He played Shirley on "What's Happenin?" - fxsnyc 6/19/01

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 03:09 PM

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107. "too simplified"
In response to Reply # 100


  

          

a) people are not soft drinks
b) who's to say he picked her out of a lineup, based on color? who's to say that the two even started out with romantic intentions? i just think that in a lot of cases, it's just way too personal for any outsider to sit and make judgement calls. i understand that you're not trying to be offensive, but it's pretty presumptuous to tell *him* what's important to him.

-k-
*biased

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 04:02 PM

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109. "he put his personal business out there"
In response to Reply # 107


          

I didn't ask him to tell it...

I don't care how he picked her...he CHOSE to be with her. And that's my whole point. If he valued a black wife, he'd get a black wife. He's not marrying a crackhead so I'm assuming he CHOSE not to be with a crackhead. I doubt he's marrying a 500lb female either...obviously those chicks are out of the running.

See you pick who you want to be with & you pick what's important to you in a person & in a relationship. He can pick a white wife, his business but he shouldn't get mad when people look at his choices & draw obvious conclusions.

  

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Ronnie76er
Charter member
75 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 04:28 PM

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110. "RE: he put his personal business out there"
In response to Reply # 109


          

What if he chose to be with a "good" woman?

If he could choose to be with a white woman or a black woman, then why couldn't he just choose to be with a good woman?

------------------------------------
"True hip-hop is just like the underground railroad, if the message is not for you, it could sit on your nose, and your brain remain froze" - Common's Pops

"Talk 'bout beautiful things a lil bit" - Bahamadia

Hit me up at AIM:
Ronnie76er

  

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k_orr
Charter member
80197 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 04:36 PM

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111. "Looking for an excuse n/m"
In response to Reply # 110


  

          


http://breddanansi.tumblr.com/

  

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jsmooth995
Charter member
2752 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 01:31 PM

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99. "RE: Hon, I have 5 siblings that are black/white mixed"
In response to Reply # 92


  

          

> That you have decided
>that .... that making more
>black babies is not important..

Actually that choice does not prevent you from having Black babies.

There's a lot more I would question about this post, but no time now.



Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 02:20 PM

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104. "well it depends on how you define black"
In response to Reply # 99


          

if we continue to follow the 1 drop rule then yes the product of these relationships are black. But this presents tons of problems intraracially besides the fact that the "mulatto" or mixed race person has historically been a buffer "class" btwn the rest of the black population & the white ruling class. Check the US - better yet check South Africa.



  

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jsmooth995
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105. "RE: well it depends on how you define black"
In response to Reply # 104


  

          

>if we continue to follow the
>1 drop rule then yes
>the product of these relationships
>are black.

So you think it might be perfectly reasonable for someone to say, for example, that Bob Marley wasn't Black?


> But this presents
>tons of problems intraracially

What are these "tons of problems" exactly?

Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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nahymsa
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Mon Feb-04-02 02:54 PM

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106. "Its what the push for new catergories is for!"
In response to Reply # 105


          

There is an agenda by many immediately biracial people to make them a seperate & distinct category from other black people - even though 85% of black americans have "racially mixed" roots.

Bob Marley was a person of mixed decent who choose to align himself socially, culturally, politically with the blackest among us. And make no mistake about it...that played a role in his choice of mate.

As for the tons of issues..well:

1) in a color struck, color caste world with white on the top of the totem pole - mixed race (as the intermediate btwn black & white) gets elevated to a higher status than nonmixed black. Not only within the white community but within the black.

2) Historically, black/white, black/whatever mixed people have served as a buffer or middle class - South Africa today being an example.

3) confusion as to what black is & means.

4) divided loyalties. Its hard to present a unified front when you're torn btwn 2 sides. Hence why many of these biracials want a seperate category...they don't want to pick a side (unlike Bob Marley, Malcolm X, Adam Clayton Powell, etc.)

  

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jsmooth995
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Mon Feb-04-02 05:47 PM

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112. "Mixing is Not the Problem"
In response to Reply # 106


  

          

>Bob Marley was a person of
>mixed decent who choose to
>align himself socially, culturally, politically
>with the blackest among us.

So are you saying Bob Marley wasn't black, or aren't you? And what criteria are you using? Is it based measuring the various percentages of someone's ancestry, or judging how they choose to align themselves culturally?

>As for the tons of issues..well:
>1) in a color struck, color
>caste world with white on
>the top of the totem
>pole - mixed race (as
>the intermediate btwn black &
>white) gets elevated to a
>higher status than nonmixed black.
>Not only within the white
>community but within the black.

Of course, but "mixed-race" children are not the CAUSE of this, they are VICTIMS of it. Non-mixed Blacks are placed at the bottom of this same totem pole, and are exposed to "tons of issues" from there too. Does this mean we should not have Black children? Does having more Black children make the problem worse? Of course not. And neither does having more mixed children.


>2) Historically, black/white, black/whatever mixed people
>have served as a buffer
>or middle class - South
>Africa today being an example.

Again, this proves nothing, except that that mixed people are equally affected by racial politics as everyone else. Having mixed children does not create or perpetuate this problem, any more than having Black children perpetuates white supremacy.

>3) confusion as to what black
>is & means.

Just because someone has a different definition of self than you (or I) does not mean they are confused. Besides, our entire system of racial classification is based on confusion, and has no basis in science or logic. So there can be no absolute truth here.

>4) divided loyalties. Its hard
>to present a unified front
>when you're torn btwn 2
>sides. Hence why many
>of these biracials want a
>seperate category...they don't want to
>pick a side (unlike Bob
>Marley, Malcolm X, Adam Clayton
>Powell, etc.)

The process of self-definition hardly so simplistic. There are far more than two sides for anyone to be torn between, regardless of their racial percentages. How much of a unified front are "non-mixed" Blacks presenting in America right now? Case closed.

Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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nahymsa
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Mon Feb-04-02 07:35 PM

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114. "Brotha please..its clear"
In response to Reply # 112


          

You held up Bob Marley as an individual that who's heritage is mixed..but is still considered black. That's why he's your example. You didn't call the name of certain black people, like an Alex Wek, for a reason.

Bob Marley is a man of African descent who aligned himself politically, socially, and culturally with the politics of nonmixed African people DESPITE being racially mixed. Similar to an Adam Clayton Powell, who could be seen as white, but aligned himself with blacks. We all know what black means & yeah the reason we're called that is because that blackness is manifested PHYSICALLY. If we looked like Britney Spears then we wouldn't be black.


An Alek Wek is more than likely not as racially mixed as Mariah Carey..what is the confusion? Clearly Alex Wek's black experience is very different than that of Mariah (who could claim NOT to be black). Of course blackness is about physical appearance despite the fact that racially mixed black people have been included in the category. Remember, the 1 drop rule was created to (and still is in effect) to help preserve white purity. It was not a choice on our parts & still isn't (though in my experience, black people generally accept anyone as black who declares themselves such).


Read what I say very carefully:

The product of mixed race relations in South African are a buffer class btwn the whites and nonmixed blacks. With the death of apartheid, much of this mixed race population is still working fevorishly to preserve their seperate status from "blacks" because that seperate status gives them a social, economic, and political position that is higher than nonmixed blacks and they don't want to lose it.

Historically, in America, the black community has been similarly (though not legally) divided with exceptions here & there but the general principle is true. Its no question that a color caste still exists within the black community and will continue as long as we live in a white dominated society.

That being the case, why are people who claim to love being black, that understand the racial dynamic going on in this country & worldwide, deliberately aligning themselves personally with nonblack people? They've decided to make certain qualities more important than others. That's their right but that IS what they are doing.

>How much of a unified front are "non-mixed" Blacks presenting in America right now?

Of course we're not unified..we're still debating the importance of black people loving and mating with other black people. The home is the first place where this "unity" begins, its the first place culture is passed on, its the first place we start...its the foundation for our communities.

  

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Solarus
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126. "Stop it"
In response to Reply # 114


  

          

QUit wasting your time nahymsa.

____________________________
"the real pyramids were built with such precision that you can't slide a piece of paper between two 4,000 lb stones, and have shafts perfectly aligned so that you can see a tiny aperture through dozens of these mammoth blocks

  

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nahymsa
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127. "Yes, daddy ! - )"
In response to Reply # 126


          

.

  

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jsmooth995
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149. "I'll assume that"
In response to Reply # 126


  

          

by "wasting your time" you meant "writing at great length yet failing to address to any of the arguments put forth against you."


Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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Ximo
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Tue Feb-05-02 08:11 AM

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130. "who's fault is it?"
In response to Reply # 114


          

i appreciate your point of view, but why are you against biracial children because of the identity problem that occurs, it's not their fault. i think biracial parents should be aware of this whole situation, but break up the love and stick to their kind instead..? this whole problem is a product of race classification within society, not love. get what i'm saying?

<sig>
"Today’s real borders are not between nations, but between powerful
and powerless, free and fettered, privileged and humiliated" -
"I went to school for 14 years and my best teacher was experience" -
-
</sig>

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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nahymsa
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Tue Feb-05-02 10:17 AM

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137. "hon I have 5 "biracial" siblings"
In response to Reply # 130


          

I couldn't love them more..

its not about being against biracial people, most black people in the US are already multiracial to begin with.

The point is about choosing what we value as a people & what's important to ourselves, our families & our communities. I know first hand the difference btwn "biracial" children raised by black moms & those raised by white moms. I also know that a mixed marriage doesn't mean that the married are less racists or don't have issues with blackness.

In the end, the question remains, if you value your blackness, your heritage & your culture why wouldn't you choose to be with someone who brings those same qualities to the table? If I believe in Islam, it makes no sense for me to marry a Christian.


  

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Ximo
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Tue Feb-05-02 11:59 AM

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141. "if i love someone,"
In response to Reply # 137


          

it makes no difference whether she's a christian, muslim or whatever she is. that's where we're different..

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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nahymsa
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Wed Feb-06-02 05:59 AM

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155. "If you loved Christianity, it would"
In response to Reply # 141


          

make a difference...that your mate was not Christian..as it should.

  

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Ximo
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Wed Feb-06-02 09:25 AM

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165. "true, but that depends"
In response to Reply # 155


          

on how open minded you are.. some christians (and others) are not that strict, and choose love before religion. (i have no specific religion to make that clear)

i still don't like the "stick to your own kind" idea, but i respect your view as long as you don't try to impose(?) it onto others or diss those not doing the same thing (i don't believe you are thou).

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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nahymsa
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Wed Feb-06-02 12:08 PM

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171. "If you truly believe Jesus is God"
In response to Reply # 165


          

and the only way into Heaven is thru Christ, then why would you marry a Jew?

this is my only point. Those "openminded" Christians, imo, aren't as sure of their faith as they could be. If they truly believed then why would they marry someone who doesn't then make babies & raise these kids to "choose" a religion? It makes no sense.

  

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Ximo
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178. "..to you!"
In response to Reply # 171


          

but seriously, let's get off this topic-stretching.. you're too stubborn (no offence) for having a discussion with me

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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jsmooth995
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Tue Feb-05-02 09:46 AM

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136. "apples and cucumbers"
In response to Reply # 114


  

          

>You held up Bob Marley as
>an individual that who's heritage
>is mixed..but is still considered
>black. That's why he's
>your example. You didn't
>call the name of certain
>black people, like an Alex
>Wek, for a reason.

"You say apples taste good, and you cite the Red Delicious as an example. I notice you didn't mention the cucumber, and that's for a reason."

Uhh, yeah, and the reason is we're talking about apples, so cucumbers are irrelevant.

I didn't mention Alex Wek because I am trying clarify your perception of people who have one Black parent and one non-Black. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't believe Alex Wek falls into that category. So I can't use her as an example, because she is not an example.


>Bob Marley is a man of
>African descent who aligned himself
>politically, socially, and culturally with
>the politics of nonmixed African
>people DESPITE being racially mixed.
>Similar to an Adam Clayton
>Powell, who could be seen
>as white, but aligned himself
>with blacks. We all
>know what black means &
>yeah the reason we're called
>that is because that blackness
>is manifested PHYSICALLY. If
>we looked like Britney Spears
>then we wouldn't be black.

Evidently you are never going to give a straight answer on whether you consider Bob Marley to be Black. But regardless...

If you are saying the sole measure of blackness is physical appearance, then most mixed children are undoubtedly Black, just as you yourself said 85% of Black people are mixed to some extent. According to this standard your original statement that mixed couples don't have Black children is false, which is what I was getting at.

>Read what I say very carefully:
>The product of mixed race relations
>in South African are a
>buffer class btwn the whites
>and nonmixed blacks...
> ...............
>Historically, in America, the black community
>has been similarly (though not
>legally) divided with exceptions here
>& there but the general
>principle is true. Its
>no question that a color
>caste still exists within the
>black community and will continue
>as long as we live
>in a white dominated society...
>.................

We all agree that these problems exist. You are just unclear when it comes to differentiating between cause and effect.

People of mixed background are placed into an unhealthy position by the color caste system. Non-mixed Black people are placed into an equally unhealthy position by the color caste system. Is this problem caused by the existence of mixed people? Is it caused by the existence of Black people? Or is it caused by the existence of the color caste system?


Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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nahymsa
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Tue Feb-05-02 10:38 AM

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138. "By your logic Britney Spears is black"
In response to Reply # 136


          

AT some point all humanity comes from black people. But there are clearly some people who are blacker than others. Bob Marley is "biracial" person who's aligned himself politically, socially & culturally with nonbiracial black people. He has aligned himself on the basis of color & shared common cultural traits. All biracials do not...and they have groups & organizations that are all about making sure to promote the distinction. Some biracials are black culturally but they are not black physically & you simply can;t seperate physical blackness from the black experience...though many have tried. The "blacks" walking around "passing" now - simply aren't black by virtue of their ability to be white...regardless of what their background is. Cameron Diaz is a white girl..I don't care if she's spanish or not. J-Lo is not black.

Bob Marley married a black woman in part because he wanted a black wife & black babies..why? Bob Marley saw himself as black, valued his blackness & acted accordingly.

  

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jsmooth995
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Tue Feb-05-02 11:02 AM

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139. "i'm using YOUR logic"
In response to Reply # 138


  

          

My logic? I am merely applying the criteria that YOU set forth. And I don't see how any of your criteria would designate Britney Spears as Black.

>AT some point all humanity comes
>from black people. But
>there are clearly some people
>who are blacker than others.
> Bob Marley is "biracial"
>person who's aligned himself politically,
>socially & culturally with nonbiracial
>black people. He has
>aligned himself on the basis
>of color & shared common
>cultural traits. All biracials do
>not...and they have groups &
>organizations that are all about
>making sure to promote the
>distinction. Some biracials
>are black culturally but they
>are not black physically &
>you simply can;t seperate physical
>blackness from the black experience...though
>many have tried. The
>"blacks" walking around "passing" now
>- simply aren't black by
>virtue of their ability to
>be white...regardless of what their
>background is. Cameron Diaz
>is a white girl..I don't
>care if she's spanish or
>not. J-Lo is not
>black.

Okay, but none of that does anything to disprove what I just said, or to answer the questions I just asked... I think this conversation may have run its course at this point.

Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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Ximo
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Tue Feb-05-02 12:35 PM

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143. "my thoughts on this"
In response to Reply # 139


          

i think this discussion is straight bs. race is a manmade concept to seperate humans.. a baby boy born with darker skin by "african related" parents (trying to avoid the words) is placed into the "black" cathegory. a baby boy born with lighter skin by "european related" parents is now "white".. crazy!

anyway, let's look at the life of the dark skinned boy. the boy grows up surrounded by "blacks" in a "black" community. his whole life he'll see signs of what "black" is, especially on tv but also in other medias and because of the power of media - even in society. as he grows up, he realize that he is "black". his family is "black", most people he know are "blacks" - his people are "blacks"! from here, he's generally a "black man" and "black" is his identity unless he can detach from that. it's about same thing for the light skinned boy..

am i completely wrong? maybe, but as a twin i know what it's like being labeled something, given an identity, and i really hate that.. i want to build my own identity independantly. detach from the identity given to me by others (i never thought about that i was a twin before people kept telling me and my bro). that's my basis for my thoughts on this topic, and i realize that i can't really adapt to these "race" problems, but that's what i was thinking. don't take it too serious..

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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mr_tim

Wed Feb-06-02 01:15 AM

  
150. "RE: By your logic Britney Spears is black"
In response to Reply # 138


          

>Bob Marley married a black woman
>in part because he wanted
>a black wife & black
>babies..why? Bob Marley saw himself
>as black, valued his blackness
>& acted accordingly.

Bob also had at least one white girlfriend. Actually, she may be biracial but her skin is whiter than Bob's was.

A question...Do your problems with mixed marriages only apply to blacks or to anyone? My daughter is half Anglo-Australian/Maori and half Khmer-Thai....

peace

mr.tim

  

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nahymsa
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Wed Feb-06-02 06:01 AM

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156. "What problems?"
In response to Reply # 150


          

People will do what they want, I can't & wouldn't want to stop them. But let's call a spade a spade, if you want to, if its important to you to have black children, if you want to marry a black women then you would.

  

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jsmooth995
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Wed Feb-06-02 06:34 AM

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160. "Of course you have problems"
In response to Reply # 156


  

          

> What problems? People will do what they want,
>I can't & wouldn't want
>to stop them.

You are clearly making a value judgement about mixed marriages, and it's just silly to keep denying that. If that is your opinion, that is your opinion, and I respect your right to represent it. But at least be real about what you are saying and stick by it.


Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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nahymsa
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Wed Feb-06-02 12:12 PM

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172. "Sweetie you be real"
In response to Reply # 160


          

I'm not denying anything...I'm very clear.

I don't hate mixed people, I have 5 siblings who I love dearly. Love my mom & pops too..both who made decisions to be with white people at different points in their lives. Doesn't mean that I have to agree with their decision or ignore the implications of what those decisions mean.

Don't get salty because you fuck with white chicks & don't want to acknowledge what that says about what you value.

  

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jsmooth995
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182. "A Perfect Illustration"
In response to Reply # 172


  

          

>Don't get salty because you fuck
>with white chicks & don't
>want to acknowledge what that
>says about what you value.

When you can't defend your idea on its own merits you have no choice but to get personal. But unfortunately you are incorrect, as I have never been with a White woman.

Thank you for illustrating perfectly why it is misguided to make assumptions and pass judgement on others as you are trying to do in this thread. You will often be wrong, just as you were right here.

Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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johnny_domino
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Wed Feb-06-02 01:34 PM

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186. "Yeah logic!"
In response to Reply # 182


  

          

boo assumptions and passing judgement on people!

Nasty like the freaky deaky at your local sleazy speakeasy - MF Doom

  

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nahymsa
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Wed Feb-06-02 01:36 PM

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187. "actually i simply confused you with another poster"
In response to Reply # 182


          

who did state that they would & have dated anyone of any racial background. No bad..and yours too....

  

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M2
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Mon Feb-04-02 07:00 PM

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113. "Look"
In response to Reply # 92


          

.....I agree with you that decide to fall in love with certain types of people...but it's not as deep as making it a "priority to date Black, have a Black mother or to love Black women"

It's a fantasy based on what you *think* will work....and as people grow up, they discover that their fantasies are often wrong and that their ideal has to be changed because the person won't neccessarily come in the package they want...or they may realize that their fantasy isn't what they truly want/need.

Besides, once a relationship gets serious/towards the marriage phase...things have gone waaaaaaaaaay past just dating a fantasy, you obviously have a very real bond.

That being said, Brotha man pointed out that his mental picture was of a Black Woman....but that he fell in love with a White Woman...since we don't know him, his fiance and their interpersonal dynamic....we cannot put forth "obvious assumptions" as if they are fact. All we know is that he believes he's in love with this woman.

Time will tell if his love is real, if his belief is genuine....but at this time, we don't have the information to make judgements.

As for priorities, if you're the type that feels that dating someone of your own race is so important that you'll reject someone who "fits" just because of the slant of their eyes or the amount of melanin in your skin...

....it simply says that you'll reject people who you're falling in love/fit with you.....if they don't fall into a certain racial category.

Let's not make this into a federal case where your dating choices have far reaching social and spiritual reprocussions; no one is that special that they need to date a Black woman to help the community. If you decide you HAVE to date Black women (Even if you're attracted to and/or develop a bond/fall in love with a non-Black one) you're doing so for your own ego, so you can hold up the person up as a symbol of how down you are.

If you're only attracted to Black women and/or can only relate to Black women....then fine...but don't hold up your relationship as some sort of Paragon that other Blacks need to follow....and/or deride other Blacks for not dating their own.

If someone is genuinely happy with someone who isn't their own race...fine, let' em' be.....don't pass judgements until you know they aren't happy....and don't think yourself special because your partner is Black.




Peace,






M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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nahymsa
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1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:09 PM

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115. "Are you black?"
In response to Reply # 113


          

Because I hardly see why you feel qualified to tell black people what should be important to them if you're not.

Anyway, bonds can be based on a lot of things..you decide what you want in your life & why. I could care less about the personal dynamic btwn this brotha and his mate..and no one is debating whether its his choice. Its not a question of letting anyone be...he is doing precisely what he wants to do..he asked for commentary on it by bringing his relationship into the conversation. The point remains IF he wanted a black woman in his life, he would make the point of getting one...period. Whoever fits in his life is his decision...its not arbitrary, its a choice because he can make room or not depending on what he values.


Who you love & mate with is the most important decision you can make in your life. It does have far reaching social & spiritual repercussions. Its speaks volumns about what you value & what you don't. When Malcolm X chose his wife, her being black & muslim was part of his requirements because he valued blackness, Islam and wanted to bring forth & raise black muslim babies.

I look around & see many single black women (parents & not), many fatherless children. I don't think its crazy to expect that black men should be the first ones that these people should be able to turn too orthat black men should think its a priority to join with women who could've been their mamas to make or care for children that could've been them.




  

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M2
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Mon Feb-04-02 08:47 PM

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116. "RE: Are you black?"
In response to Reply # 115


          

>Because I hardly see why you
>feel qualified to tell black
>people what should be important
>to them if you're not.

The color of my skin holds no relevance to the validity of my opinons in this matter...


But since you asked.......


Go to the Grocery Store, buy a Twix Bar....remove the wrapper...I'm the same color as the Twix bar.

I'm living Chocolate.......

Answer your question?

>The point remains IF he
>wanted a black woman in
>his life, he would make
>the point of getting one...period.
>Whoever fits in his life
>is his decision...its not arbitrary,
>its a choice because he
>can make room or not
>depending on what he values.

I'm tempted to ask your age and how many serious relationships you've had.

You make it sound like people have the option of going and picking someone out of a lineup and molding them into their ideal mate.

I don't mean to sound Daft..but grow up.

People don't just decide that they're going to love and "fit" with one type of person...it doesn't work that way.

If it was as simple as making something a priority and going out and getting that person.....no one would be single.

Seeing as you have no information as to the Black women he sees on a regular vs. the White women he sees.....you can't really make the determination with regards to whether he's met a Black woman he would've fit with as well or better with then this White Woman...a Black woman he would've fell in love with...and more importantly a Black woman who fell in love with HIM.

You've boiled this down to being as simple as someone purchasing a car....it's not.......


You can't make it a priority to fall in love with someone.....or for that person to connect with you....

Nor can you say that someone else didn't make it a priority unless you know for a fact that they are refusing to date Black Women and/or are rejecting good matches with Black women in order to wait for a non-Black woman who matches up.

>
>
>
>Who you love & mate with
>is the most important decision
>you can make in your
>life.

No one picks who they love, they pick who they want to love...two entirely different things.

You make this sound as mechanical a decision as me test driving a Mistsubish, A Nissan and a Honda and picking the Honda........

If we're going to take it to that level......

People should start giving potential mates physical and intellectual tests to make sure they pass on good genes to their children.

It does have far
>reaching social & spiritual repercussions.
>Its speaks volumns about what
>you value & what you
>don't. When Malcolm
>X chose his wife, her
>being black & muslim was
>part of his requirements because
>he valued blackness, Islam and
>wanted to bring forth &
>raise black muslim babies.



Even Malcolm wasn't that special.....it does NOT have far reaching social and spiritual repercussions beyond dealing with people who have an issue with it.


>I look around & see many
>single black women (parents &
>not), many fatherless children. I
>don't think its crazy to
>expect that black men should
>be the first ones that
>these people should be able
>to turn too orthat black
>men should think its a
>priority to join with women
>who could've been their mamas
>to make or care for
>children that could've been them.
>

#1. If you're a single Mother you need to be looking to the father of those kids for help, and/or doing what you can to take care of your family.

#2. It's not the responsibility of single Black men to take on the responsibility of someone else's family/kids just because the kids share a racial identity with them.

Personally, I won't date single mothers...nor do I feel I a responsibility to do so.

#3. Priorities, Shmiorities.....people should make it a priority to get with people that make them happy....period.

Stop turning this into some sort of social & spiritual crisis issue....if the person truly loves that person, let them be...the have no responsibility to reject someone who loves them, just so they can get with a Black woman.

I'm a rather strange person, an electic assemblage of likes & dislikes.....as well as goals and aspirations....I've found while I can make surface connections with women...it rarely goes deeper because they don't "Get Me"....and I know that if past history is any indication...if I find someone like that....even if the relationship doesn't workout...I have a friend for life.

SO, I'm not going to reject non-Black women who get me, in favor of one who doesn't, or in favor of waiting until the right Sistah comes along.

If I meet someone who "gets me" and they're Black...cool....if she's Korean/Italian/A Wasp or something else....cool...I don't have time to find the right sistah......when it's hard enough to find the right woman...





Peace,





M2





The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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nahymsa
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Tue Feb-05-02 07:26 AM

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128. "Hon, I'm past my 20s"
In response to Reply # 116


          

I choose who I deal with, I don't deal with drug dealers, I don't deal with men who hit women, I don't deal with men with bad teeth, I don't date men who are shorter than me, I don't date me that don't read books, I don't deal w/ men that support Clarence Thomas. And I don't date white men. I've decided on a daily basis who I will give the opportunity to get to know me better..I certainly don't make myself available to each man that approaches me. I would never teach my daughters that you stumble into the most important relationship into your life or that LOVE CHOOSES YOU. We all should decide what we value and make sure that we seek that in our mates & bring it into our lives. Women that don't are the same type that end up cowering from fists thinking love is something that's grabbed hold of them. I would never tell anyone that they don't have the power to choose who they love....its God given.

I boiled it down to the basic because it really is that simple. We're not talking about a situation where there are physically not enough black women to pair up with black men. If a black man wants a black woman, he has an overwhelming selection or he can go to where there is one.

>People should start giving potential mates
>physical and intellectual tests to make sure they pass on
>good genes to their children.

People already do that, most people without down syndrome wouldn't date someone with it. Most of us aren't atracted to the sickly or the weak.

If you don't feel black people should look out for one another that's your business. Thankfully, those before you didn't feel that way. You decide what you value. My mate & I will adopting a black child because that's our responsibility to our people, our community. Those are our values. IF your values don't lead you there then so be it.

  

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guerilla_love
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Tue Feb-05-02 08:08 AM

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129. "such a great point:"
In response to Reply # 128


          

Women that don't are the same type that end up cowering from fists thinking love is something that's grabbed hold of them




==**peace**==

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kemetian
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Tue Feb-05-02 09:00 AM

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134. "i love u"
In response to Reply # 128


  

          

really.


>I choose who I deal with,
>I don't deal with drug
>dealers, I don't deal with
>men who hit women, I
>don't deal with men with
>bad teeth, I don't date
>men who are shorter than
>me, I don't date me
>that don't read books, I
>don't deal w/ men that
>support Clarence Thomas. And I
>don't date white men.
>I've decided on a daily
>basis who I will give
>the opportunity to get to
>know me better..I certainly don't
>make myself available to each
>man that approaches me. I
>would never teach my daughters
>that you stumble into the
>most important relationship into your
>life or that LOVE CHOOSES
>YOU. We all should
>decide what we value and
>make sure that we seek
>that in our mates &
>bring it into our lives.
> Women that don't are
>the same type that end
>up cowering from fists thinking
>love is something that's grabbed
>hold of them. I
>would never tell anyone that
>they don't have the power
>to choose who they love....its
>God given.
>
>I boiled it down to the
>basic because it really is
>that simple. We're not talking
>about a situation where there
>are physically not enough black
>women to pair up with
>black men. If a
>black man wants a black
>woman, he has an overwhelming
>selection or he can go
>to where there is one.
>
>
>>People should start giving potential mates
>>physical and intellectual tests to make sure they pass on
>>good genes to their children.
>
>People already do that, most people
>without down syndrome wouldn't date
>someone with it. Most of
>us aren't atracted to the
>sickly or the weak.
>
>If you don't feel black people
>should look out for one
>another that's your business. Thankfully,
>those before you didn't feel
>that way. You decide what
>you value. My mate &
>I will adopting a black
>child because that's our responsibility
>to our people, our community.
>Those are our values.
>IF your values don't lead
>you there then so be
>it.


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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johnny_domino
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Tue Feb-05-02 12:28 PM

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142. "look at your vocab"
In response to Reply # 128


  

          

you talk about "selecting a mate", like you go to the mate store, go down the rows, find a mate that looks agreeable to you, and then say "yes, I believe I'll have intercourse and raise children with that one. Along the way, we'll impart our spiritual and social values to them." It's been my experience, that I only find love when I'm not actively looking for it, often times I tend to trip over it or fall over backwards onto it, and especially not if you go out, find a person you think looks like how you want your mate to look and then just wind up with them. I mean, maybe it's easier for women or something, I don't even know if you're male or female, I haven't read your posts carefully enough.

Another thing, have you ever considered the fact that in placing so much emphasis on finding a black mate, and raising black children with an emphasis on blackness, you're perpetuating the rigidity of racial categories just as much as the most bigoted klansmen. Obviously, you're hopefully not teaching your kids to hate those of other races, but in buying into the insurmountable racial differences argument, you're assuring that true understanding of people as people, regardless of race, will never be reached by you or your family. There's nothing wrong with knowing yourself, knowing your culture, where you came from and all that. But when you allow that to limit you as a person, including in terms of who you wanna raise kids with, you're not really moving forward, you're staying in place.

P.S. feel free to use the "you're not black, so you don't get it" argument, 'cause it'll work on me, I'm not black, I'm a blond haired, blue eyed devil.

Nasty like the freaky deaky at your local sleazy speakeasy - MF Doom

  

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M2
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10072 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 02:42 PM

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145. "It's interesting....."
In response to Reply # 128


          

How you respond to a post by not addressing any of the issues and/or questions that the person brought up.


>I
>would never teach my daughters
>that you stumble into the
>most important relationship into your
>life or that LOVE CHOOSES
>YOU.
>We all should
>decide what we value and
>make sure that we seek
>that in our mates &
>bring it into our lives.
> Women that don't are
>the same type that end
>up cowering from fists thinking
>love is something that's grabbed
>hold of them.

No offense, but this is complete and utter Bullshit. I know and am related to women who have been in this situation, I've been in the next room and have been forced to Physically Intervene, helped them get away from the situation and helped them rebuild their lives...

Women who get beat by their Husbands, end up in that situation for a variety of reasons....that have nothing to do with the fact that they believe "Love Chooses You". Considering how many women who more or less think like you, get married to Brothas that beat them, your logic doesn't hold.

Self Esteem is at the heart of the issue with respect to women who get abused, they think they deserve it, they're afraid of living without their husbands, they convince themselves that he's a good man, a good provider.....they may even convince themselves they love the man.

BUT, when the person you think you love, turns out to be hamrful to you.....it's self esteem that keeps you in that situation....NOT the fact that you believe Love Chooses you.

Getting women out of (and keeping them) out these situations, is a function of teaching them not to be victims (or to accept it), to have faith in themselves and have the confidence to fight back/leave.

It has nothing to do with how they view love.

</end rant>

Back to the subject at hand.......

People with Downs Syndrome are a bad example, because I wasn't talking about people with an obvious defect. I was talking about taking people without obvious defects/diseases and submitting them to a battery of tests, mental & physical and making my decision based on that.

E.g. Choosing a girlfriend based on her scores on an IQ test and the "M2 Physical Fitness Test"

There is a big difference between rejecting a girl who has downs or a disease...and rejecting one because her IQ is 125 instead of 135 and because she can't do 50 pushups in 2 minutes.

You still haven't addressed the fact that you don't know everyone in an interracial relationship, you don't know if they have neccessarily rejected a Black woman to be in it.....nor do you know if this non-Black woman is the first woman to really connect with them.

Basically, the only inference you can make is that these two people are willing to date outside their race....because you don't KNOW them. If I see a Black couple I can't infer that they value being with Black people and will only date Black people, all I can infer is that they want to be together.

If we met 40 years from now and I introduce to a woman that I've been with for 38 of those years....could you make the inference that I only want to be with Black people and won't date other races?

No, because it wouldn't be true.

As for the fact that there are Numerically enough Black Women to go around....that has nothing to do with the fact that some people may end up connecting with a non-Black person first.....regardless if they're looking for a Black Woman.

That's the issue.....connections. IF you connect with someone, so be it...I'm not talking about staying in abusive relationships because of it. I'm merely saying that for people like me (and others) it's difficult to make a connection with someone....and it would be silly to reject those rare people you do connect with....just based on race. If a Korean Woman is making me happier then another Black women I'm interested in...why should I pick the Black woman over happiness?

Basically, if I'm forced to choose between a Black Woman and a Non-Black Woman....I'm going to go with the one I connect with the best. If someone else in that situation is always going to pick Black.....that's their perogative, they value the color of their Partners skin over the connection...

.....but it doesn't make them extra noble because they are supposedly saving the Black Community by waking up next to a Black person every day.

People should chose whoemever they have the strongest connection with.....not doing so could cause other problems down the road...

As for responsibility.....there is a big difference between working for civil rights and/or the freedom of your people......then seeking out single Black mothers....just so you can take care of them.....or even Black women just due to their skin color....not because of your mutual connection. The former is truly noble.....working for the betterment of an entire group....the latter is merely egotistical making yourself believe that the Black community is looking for you to save it/them.

You may Black people sound like chattle, as if they should forgo their feelings and simply get with Black people for the sake of doing it.

People don't go to the "Mate Store" and just pick someone out like they are picking otu cars.

If it worked that way, there wouldn't be any single people of any race.

It sounds to me that you simply "want" Black people to be with other Black people, and you're trying to make up an ideology to support it....by passing judgements on people who don't agree with you.


Peace,







M2



The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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nahymsa
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1734 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 06:21 AM

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158. "M2 please"
In response to Reply # 145


          

You thi>No offense, but this is complete
>and utter Bullshit. I know
>and am related to women
>who have been in this
>situation, I've been in the
>next room and have been
Women who get beat up & decide to leave FIRST have to let go of whatever love they think ties them to heir abuser. They CHANGE their values to include valuing themselves & their safety or that of their children. IF that determination is not made FIRST then the act of leaving (by any means necessary) will not follow...period.

>Considering how many women who more or less think like you,
>get married to Brothas that beat them, your logic doesn't
>hold.

What are you talking about? This conversation is not about black male abusers...its obvious that a woman shouldn't be with an abuser. But eliminate the abusers from the group & there are plenty of black men & women for each other.

>Self Esteem is at the heart of the issue with respect
>to women who get abused, they think they deserve it,
>they're afraid of living without their husbands, they convince themselves that he's a good man, a good provider.....they may even convince themselves they love the man.

Child, you have just made my point. Lack of self esteem is a lack of VALUING self.

>BUT, when the person you think you love, turns out to
>be hamrful to you.....it's self esteem that keeps you in
>that situation....NOT the fact that you believe Love Chooses you.

Alot of these women think that their LOVE for their abuser is something out of their control, that they can't help it. Ask me how I know this, please.

>Getting women out of (and keeping them) out these situations, is a function of teaching them not to be victims (or
>to accept it), to have faith in themselves and have
>the confidence to fight back/leave.
>
>
>It has nothing to do with how they view love.

IT have everything to do with how they view love - and what they value - they don't value themselves or valuing not being divorce, not failing, not being embarassed, not being alone, etc. more.

As for you other points.. I say again, if you value a black mate you will have one. If that's passing judgement so be it... But your actions tell what's important to you. It really is that simple.

  

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M2
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Wed Feb-06-02 07:00 AM

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161. "RE: M2 please"
In response to Reply # 158


          


>Women who get beat up &
>decide to leave FIRST have
>to let go of whatever
>love they think ties them
>to heir abuser. They CHANGE
>their values to include valuing
>themselves & their safety or
>that of their children. IF
>that determination is not made
>FIRST then the act of
>leaving (by any means necessary)
>will not follow...period.

No kidding, but this has nothing to do with how they view love. A woman who decides she will only love Black Men who are taller then her/thinks like you, isn't any less likely to be abused then a woman who thinks that love happens...and bases her decisions on a mate not on race, but by whome she falls in love with.

Self Esteem, however, WILL determine a woman's likelihood of being abused and/or determine her ability to escape from it.

Deciding to love only particular types of men and learning to avoid potential abusers or escaping men who reveal themselves to be abusers are too different things.

My Sister is with a White Man, even though her preference was to be with a Black Man...but this is the man she fell in love with so she went with her heart. She is not more likely to be abused since she went with her heart and not with her preference.

Why?

Because she has high self esteem is not the type to let anyone abuse her in any way, shape or fashion.

So again, your logic that women who feel that love chooses them instead of Vice Versa, are more likely to be abused doesn't hold.

As for the other points, you don't want to debate them....you just want to reiterate your point of view, as if it's as absolute as 2 + 2 = 4.

Hint: It's not, nothing is absolute when dealing with people.

If you don't want to debate, that's your perogative. It must be nice living in your concrete world where only your point of view, or ideology is correct.



Peace,






M2



>>Considering how many women who more or less think like you,
>>get married to Brothas that beat them, your logic doesn't
>>hold.
>
>What are you talking about? This
>conversation is not about black
>male abusers...its obvious that a
>woman shouldn't be with an
>abuser. But eliminate the abusers
>from the group & there
>are plenty of black men
>& women for each other.

The point is that your logic regarding what causes women to be with Abusers, has nothing to do with how they view/value love, because someone who thinks like you do (I know abused women who do) can still end up in an abusive relationship and not leave.





>>Self Esteem is at the heart of the issue with respect
>>to women who get abused, they think they deserve it,
>>they're afraid of living without their husbands, they convince themselves that he's a good man, a good provider.....they may even convince themselves they love the man.
>
>Child, you have just made my
>point. Lack of self
>esteem is a lack of
>VALUING self.
>
>>BUT, when the person you think you love, turns out to
>>be hamrful to you.....it's self esteem that keeps you in
>>that situation....NOT the fact that you believe Love Chooses you.
>
>Alot of these women think that
>their LOVE for their abuser
>is something out of their
>control, that they can't help
>it. Ask me how
>I know this, please.
>
>>Getting women out of (and keeping them) out these situations, is a function of teaching them not to be victims (or
>>to accept it), to have faith in themselves and have
>>the confidence to fight back/leave.
>>
>>
>>It has nothing to do with how they view love.
>
>IT have everything to do with
>how they view love -
>and what they value -
>they don't value themselves or
>valuing not being divorce, not
>failing, not being embarassed, not
>being alone, etc. more.
>
>As for you other points.. I
>say again, if you value
>a black mate you will
>have one. If that's passing
>judgement so be it...
>But your actions tell what's
>important to you. It really
>is that simple.



The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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nahymsa
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Wed Feb-06-02 12:24 PM

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173. "Clearing up this confusion"
In response to Reply # 161


          

I never said that deciding to date within your race means you're more likely to get abused.

I said believing that you don't choose who you love or have power over who/what you accept in your life FALLS RIGHT IN LINE with the type of thinking many abused women have.

Self esteem is about valuing self. And this conversation is about values.

>Deciding to love only particular types of men and learning to
>avoid potential abusers or escaping men who reveal themselves >to be abusers are too different things.

An abuser is a type of man....learning to avoid certain types of men is the same process of choosing certain qualities in a man that you value. If you value a man who abuse you then you watch for a man that shows signs of those qualities & avoid or dump him when they appear. If you value a man who's quiet then you don't date a man who yells. If you value a black man in your life then you date a black man.

>My Sister is with a White Man, even though her preference
>was to be with a Black Man...but this is the
>man she fell in love with so she went with
>her heart. She is not more likely to be abused
>since she went with her heart and not with her
>preference.

I never ever implied that she would be more likely to be abused. I believe your sister chose her mate...some people want to suggest that she didn't...she just "fell" & couldn't help it. That's bullshit, imo.

  

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johnny_domino
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Wed Feb-06-02 12:42 PM

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176. "the thing is"
In response to Reply # 173


  

          

you're implying that if someone black decides to date someone they like, and that other person is white, then they don't value black men. You seem to be saying, "if you don't date black, and exclusively black, then you don't really value black people".I don't think you get to make that judgment on everyone. If you decide for whatever reason decide that only a black man will do for you, well that's obviously your prerogative. To me though, it just sounds closed-minded, I mean maybe you find a black man that you love, in which case, great for everybody. But what if, by shutting off options, you miss out on some great people, even miss out on love and having a family because of that?

Nasty like the freaky deaky at your local sleazy speakeasy - MF Doom

  

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kemetian
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1336 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 12:52 PM

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177. "How is this possible?"
In response to Reply # 176


  

          

But what
>if, by shutting off options,
>you miss out on ...
love and having a
>family because of that?

if u don't make it so? the point is u CHOOSE to love and NOT to love, having said that, u can't "miss out on love." it's not a TV show, it's not out of your control. if u WANT love (with a black person) u will HAVE love (with a black person). love is not something u "miss out on."

that's ludicrous.

aren't most of u are saying that u can "find love" anywhere, with anyone? so how then, by constraining your selection to the bajillion black ppl on earth are u risking "missing out" on anything? ppl constrain their selection all the time, what Nah said about homeless ppl, toothless ppl, excessively overweight ppl, those are all egs of "shutting off options." and ppl still seem not to "miss out."

so i'm not feeling u on that, blonde-haired, blue-eyed devil.


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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johnny_domino
Charter member
17027 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 01:13 PM

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181. "RE: How is this possible?"
In response to Reply # 177


  

          

>But what
>>if, by shutting off options,
>>you miss out on ...
>love and having a
>>family because of that?
>
>if u don't make it so?
>the point is u CHOOSE
>to love and NOT to
>love, having said that, u
>can't "miss out on love."

but you can't make someone love you back. I don't see an attractive girl on the street and say "baby, I love you", and then we fall in love. It's a process, and try as much as you want to, you can't fix it so that a certain person falls in love with you. You definitely can miss out on love, even if you have a lot of love in your heart, you may not find the right person to give it to.

> it's not a TV
>show, it's not out of
>your control. if u WANT
>love (with a black person)
>u will HAVE love (with
>a black person). love is
>not something u "miss out
>on."
plenty of people go through their whole lives and never really find it. Or, they find it and lose it. Just look at the number of divorces out there. Finding love isn't a given, that's why there is so much interest in "finding the right person". If it was easy, there'd be no need for all those damn dating shows on TV, and no audience for them either.


>that's ludicrous.
>
>aren't most of u are saying
>that u can "find love"
>anywhere, with anyone? so how
>then, by constraining your
>selection to the bajillion black
>ppl on earth are u
>risking "missing out" on anything?
I don't necessarily believe there's only "one person" out there for everyone, I think there's a few. But, what if the few people you could truly connect with, spend your life with, don't share your race/ethnicity? You can't force love, and if you don't find someone black who you love and loves you back in your lifetime, how are you gonna know that you couln't have found someone white, or asian, or hispanic, who you could've spent your life with happily?

>ppl constrain their selection all
>the time, what Nah said
>about homeless ppl, toothless ppl,
>excessively overweight ppl, those are
>all egs of "shutting off
>options." and ppl still
>seem not to "miss out."
I'm sure even some of thsoe homeless people, toothless people, and excessively overweight people find love, though obviously not too many people are looking to find their soulmate passed out in the gutter. The point is, you can't assume you know what your soulmate/soulmates are gonna look like, I don't think that's really love, I think that's just convincing yourself you know what love is. I'm not saying that if you're black and you decide you can only fall in love with someone black, you're necessarily not gonna find true love. But, what if the black people you meet in your life just don't cut it? As far as I'm concerned, you've only got one lifetime to live, and if you disqualify everyone of other races, you're fooling yourself, and possibly hurting yourself too.
>
>so i'm not feeling u on
>that, blonde-haired, blue-eyed devil.
>
>>said it!]
I was hoping someone would use it, I invited it.
>Shemhotep
>************
>"If u want a butterfly u
>got to B a
>butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly
>
>"the wages of sin is death"
>
>Romans ch.6 v.23
>
>"If the essence of 'love'... is
>giving
>selflessly or sacrificing for others,
>how can it then be equated
>with
>something that you can 'fall into
>or
>out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer
>Amen,
>Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union
'cause you've gotta be loved back, for it to be love. Just giving selflessly is showing love on your part, but they're not necessarily gonna return the favor.
>


Nasty like the freaky deaky at your local sleazy speakeasy - MF Doom

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 02:39 PM

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190. "Empirical Data"
In response to Reply # 173


          

>I never said that deciding to
>date within your race means
>you're more likely to get
>abused.

I never said you did, I was talking


>I said believing that you don't
>choose who you love or
>have power over who/what you
>accept in your life FALLS
>RIGHT IN LINE with the
>type of thinking many abused
>women have.

I disagree.....plenty of women who won't accept abuse don't believe you choose how you love....hell most people don't believe that.



>I never ever implied that she
>would be more likely to
>be abused. I believe
>your sister chose her mate...some
>people want to suggest
>that she didn't...she just "fell"
>& couldn't help it. That's
>bullshit, imo.

That's the thing, you "BELIEVE" but you don't know. You don't know my sister, where she lives, who she associates with, what she's like, her socio-economic background, nothing...all you know is that she's with a White Man...so you ASSUME that it must be because she's made a value judgement to date Whites over Blacks.

But in all reality you simply don't know.

All you have is an assumption, an assumption you're porporting to be fact, the final word.

But you don't really know.

Unless you're in someone's shoes, and know for a fact that they're coming into contact with Black women that are connecting with them and they are disabusing those connections in favor of White Women.....you really don't know.

You're just assuming and you really can't porport it to be fact.

As far as Values and Options go, oftentimes people options will outweigh their values.......I value living in the Northeast I wouldn't live anywhere else in this country, but I got laid off....and if best job OPTION is located in California....I'm not going to bag Groceries at the Acme just so I can keep living near Philly.

Why?

Because financially it won't work.....I have no choice....your options can define your values.


Considering how many people who are looking for a Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Black, Korean, Puerto Rican, Jamaican, et al...mate and are having difficulty...it's not inconceivable that these people's options could end up defining their choices...even in the face of contrary values.




Peace,






M2


The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Thu Feb-07-02 10:42 AM

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199. "Values and Options"
In response to Reply # 190


  

          


>As far as Values and Options
>go, oftentimes people options will
>outweigh their values.......I value living
>in the Northeast I wouldn't
>live anywhere else in this
>country, but I got laid
>off....and if best job OPTION
>is located in California....

but in moving to California isn't that showing that perhaps u don't VALUE living in the NE as much as u think u do? go w/ me for a moment here, if u did VALUE living in the NE to the point where u wouldn't live anywhere else, then the "best" option wouldn't be in California, b/c California wouldn't be an option.
u wouldn't have looked to California in the first place, b/c u would have limited your search for a nu job in the NE, b/c u VALUE living in the NE.

I'm not
>going to bag Groceries at
>the Acme just so I
>can keep living near Philly.
>
>
>Why?
>
>Because financially it won't work.....


well, doesn't that mean u VALUE money more than u VALUE living in the NE?




>I have
>no choice....your options can define
>your values.


i think it's the opposite really, i think your VALUES shape your "Options." it's like this, if i'm broke, prostitution isn't an option 4 me b/c of my values, while for others it is a valid option b/c they have different VALUES. yes. i'm sure of it, Values shape what u define as OPTIONS. again going back to engineering, values are like your constraints for a design. what is a feasible alternative solution (read: "Option") is constrained by non-functional reqs (read: Values).


>Considering how many people who are
>looking for a Jewish, Christian,
>Muslim, Black, Korean, Puerto Rican,
>Jamaican, et al...mate and are
>having difficulty...it's not inconceivable that
>these people's options could end
>up defining their choices...even in
>the face of contrary values.
>
>
>
>
>
>Peace,
>
>
>
>
>
>
>M2
>


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Thu Feb-07-02 02:50 PM

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205. "RE: Values and Options"
In response to Reply # 199


          


>but in moving to California isn't
>that showing that perhaps u
>don't VALUE living in the
>NE as much as u
>think u do? go w/
>me for a moment here,
> if u did VALUE
>living in the NE to
>the point where u wouldn't
>live anywhere else, then the
>"best" option wouldn't be in
>California, b/c California wouldn't be
>an option.
>u wouldn't have looked to California
>in the first place, b/c
>u would have limited your
>search for a nu job
>in the NE, b/c u
>VALUE living in the NE.

In life, sometimes you have to make decisions that go against your values and/or what you feel you need/want.......out of life/a situation in an ideal sense.

Yes, I want to stay in the NE, that's where my life is. Aside from Chicago....I don't like the rest of the country.....

BUT

What sense does it make for me to stay in PA and not have enough income to pay my bills and have to life off my savings, when I can take a 9 month assignment in CA and then come back?

Sometimes, you have to adapt your values/ideals and make decisions according to what life throws at you....simply because...it's better for you.

No matter what I think about the West Coast in this situation, it's fiscally the decision.

>
>I'm not
>>going to bag Groceries at
>>the Acme just so I
>>can keep living near Philly.
>>
>>
>>Why?
>>
>>Because financially it won't work.....
>
>
>well, doesn't that mean u VALUE
>money more than u VALUE
>living in the NE?

Doesn't quite work like that, we're not talking about taking a 15% pay cut so I can live where I want to live......we're talking about the difference between paying Rent + Bills and not paying Rent + Bills.

Also: See Above.


>i think it's the opposite really,
>i think your VALUES shape
>your "Options." it's like
>this, if i'm broke, prostitution
>isn't an option 4 me
>b/c of my values, while
>for others it is a
>valid option b/c they have
>different VALUES. yes. i'm sure
>of it, Values shape what
>u define as OPTIONS.
>again going back to engineering,
>values are like your constraints
>for a design. what is
>a feasible alternative solution (read:
>"Option") is constrained by non-functional
>reqs (read: Values).


Aren't specifications/requirements merely abstracts that can be adapted to the situation in order to devise the best solution? E.g. In the end, don't real life situations shape the final result more then the original specs do?

I can't think of a project where the project was built according to the original specs and not modified according to real life issues/situations.

If anything Values (In Some Cases) define how far you'll go to address a certain problem, not neccessarily the solution to the problem itself. In other words, your values may prevent you from making SOME decisions, but others...it depends on the nature of the value itself.

For instance: Wanting to live in the NE is more of a preference then a Value, if you're not living there you may not enjoy it, but since you can return it's tolerable.

A person can value Black "Partners" and have Black "Partners" as his preference, but if someone who isn't Black comes along who makes them happy they are more then willing to date that person, even if it's not the ideal situation.

In short, they take what life has presented them and get over it.

If you come to a Barb-b-Que at my house expecting Filet Mignon and all I have is Turkey and Veggie burgers...and you're hungry and you don't have any money....you'll eat those Turkey & Veggie Burgers...I bet you'll enjoy em' too.

It's the same situation (for me) with regards to dating, there aren't a lot of people like me nor do I meet a lot of people I could develop an interest in....in my experience I meet more of those people who are White or Asian then I do that are Black....so statisically who do you think I'm going to date?

Think about it: Just the fact that I don't want marriage or children eliminates about 95-98% of the female population. Factor in how like to avoid "inter-depedency" in a relationship and the fact that I'm a bit "different" then most people and you've eliminated what 99.5% of the population?

So statistically......what do you think is going to happen?






Peace,







M2




Peace,







M2




The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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QUEENET

Tue Feb-05-02 02:54 PM

  
146. "RE: Are you black?"
In response to Reply # 115


          

yes i'm black
so chill out wit dat

  

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Toya

Tue Feb-05-02 11:34 AM

  
140. "Nahysma been on point"
In response to Reply # 92


          

with this shit every since she entered the forum. Tell em bout it sistah!

'But if we label this just picture what we might lose-- that unexpected kiss, the feeling that brought me to you!'-Bilal

  

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QUEENET

Tue Feb-05-02 02:58 PM

  
147. "RE: Nahysma been on point"
In response to Reply # 140


          

look at writing under
"okay"

  

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jahlove7
Charter member
10743 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 09:54 PM

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219. "misunderstanding nahymsa"
In response to Reply # 147


  

          

some of you obviously have. the sista didn't say that she was against interracial dating or marriage. she simply stated the obvious: that who you decide to fall in love with and take for your mate is YOUR CHOICE. and it is. some of you are seriously buggin' out. you're taking digs at the sista because you have your little taboo likings. you're trying to make it seem like love just came along and bonked you over the head, leaving you dazed, confused and drooling. since you're lovestruck, you can't help but take that white mate for your significant other. that's pure unmitigated bullshit. since when has that ever happened? how about never. the fact is, if you're in a multi-racial environment and hang around the opposite sex from a another race long enough, you're bound to find that you have things in common and might be possibly attracted to one another. but it's your CHOICE to act on that. and even if you fall in love, it's your CHOICE to take that woman as your soulmate. rocket science, this isn't. we all make choices everyday, and the people we date is one of them. the bottom line: if you're a black man and you want a black woman, you'll choose one. if you take a white woman as your bride, it's because you chose to do so. deal with it and move the hell on. and stop making sorry-ass excuses.

inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 11:22 AM

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223. "People Understand her just fine,...."
In response to Reply # 219


          

......in fact no one really disagrees with her about people making a choice...

......a choice where you decide to get with someone you like.....wow, what a controversial subject.....this shouldn't even be a topic for discussion.

If anything, we really should be saying that no one chooses who they develop feelings for, fall in love with.....they simply decide whether or not they'll act on those feelings.

E.g. People choose to act, more so then choose to have feelings for or to fall in love with.

How many of us still love, have strong feelings for someone we're no longer with or know that we shouldn't be with? OR Have feelings for someone that we don't want to have feelings for?


Anyway........

........the disagreements arise when she makes assumptions with respect to how people value their race, are being true to their responsibilities (as she sees them), not wanting to raise Black Babies, not valuing Black mothers, saying that since they are plenty of single Black Women they chose White over Black, etc, etc.

The one and ONLY assumption you can make when you see someone with ANYONE (regardless of their race) is that this is a person that they had feelings for AND that they choose to act on those feelings.

You cannot make Blanket assumptions and/or present them as absolute with respect to the decisions of someone else....without having detailed knowledge of that person and the thought process that went into that decision.

When you make those kind of assumptions, you just look like a fool......particularly when you're unwilling to consider information from the person who made the decision in the first place...because the person who made the decision is the expert on said decision....only that person knows what they were thinking when they made it.

Yes, with any decision you make, people are going to praise it, deride it, analyze it or criticize it....but only YOU are the expert on that choice....and people passing judgement or commenting on it......are themselves open for praise, Derision, agreement what have you.....based on the their comments with respect to the person's decision.

The point I'm trying to make (In my usual Verbose way ) is that if you see me walking down the street with a woman of any race, all you can say is that I had feelings for this woman and chose to act on them.

Any other assumptions you make with respect to how I value Black women, raising Black babies, my so called options amongst the available single Black Women, my supposedly choosing a compatible White woman over a compatible Black woman, etc, etc....will just be speculation....

....and if I deride your speculation or say you're wrong....you basically have to accept it...because only I know why I made a particular decision.




Peace,







M2


The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 12:43 PM

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226. "hush"
In response to Reply # 223


  

          

you're making it look like we got together in the bathroom to discuss this. =P

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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truasana
Charter member
467 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 12:00 PM

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93. "Love does conquer all"
In response to Reply # 34


          

n/m

  

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dsplace
Charter member
487 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 01:08 PM

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96. "Something else to consider"
In response to Reply # 93


          

Why can't black people exercize the option that other groups have been exercizing for years. Italians, Jews, Irish, Germans at some point have intermarried. It was never as taboo for them to intermarry as it was (is) for us, but when these enclave immigrants intermarried, it raised eyebrows. Yet, after in this country three, four or five generations, an Itialian can marry a Jew or a German can marry a Pole and nobody raises an eyebrow.

Is anyone saying Phil Gramm sold out cuz he married a Korean-American. Is Jeb Bush not "down" cuz his wife is HIspanic?

Third and fourth generation Asain and Hispanics are more likely to intermarry than they are to marry someone from the same racial/ethnic group. Jews (unless they are Orthrodox) have the lowest rate of intramarriage.

  

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k_orr
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80197 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 01:14 PM

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97. "nothing stops them"
In response to Reply # 96


  

          

It happens all the time.

But that does not mean that there is no social consequence to that action.

one
k. orr

http://breddanansi.tumblr.com/

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 02:14 PM

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101. "white men marry outside their race..."
In response to Reply # 96


          

and marry black women far less than any other group. Check the stats. Black men marry white women or nonblack women at like double the rates that black women marry white men or nonblack men.

Its not about coincidence or random circumstances...there are reasons the numbers favor one side more than the other.. Its just that no one wants to address them.

And keep in mind that on this issue black women & asian men have many of the same complaints. Asian men are increasingly complaining about the number of asian women who won't consider asian men for their husbands. There are patterns being noticed....



  

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bluesky
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58 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 03:27 AM

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119. "RE: white men marry outside their race..."
In response to Reply # 101


          

glad you brought that up............these two groups have every right to be concerned.

  

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bluesky
Charter member
58 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 03:20 AM

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118. "RE: race does not equal culture"
In response to Reply # 25


          

that sounds all fine and good.....but really shit isn't that easy. I have mixed feelings about it. On one hand it shouldn't matter, but it does. I personally wouldn't feel comfortable trying to explain the racist bullshit that goes on around me everyday if I chose to be with a man other that a black man. I don't think I would want to deal with the stress of being in an interracial relationship. I wouldn't be able to realate to them on a lot of levels.
Lately I've experienced black women telling me they date white men because they don't want to deal with "black men's bullshit". To me (being a black women) that's absolutley absurd. I'll stick with what my DADDY LOOKS LIKE!

  

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johnny_domino
Charter member
17027 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 01:17 PM

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98. "yeah dude"
In response to Reply # 2


  

          

you're way too deep for a person with different colored skin and different type hair to ever understand you.

Nasty like the freaky deaky at your local sleazy speakeasy - MF Doom

  

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Cendeco
Charter member
393 posts
Wed Jan-30-02 04:45 PM

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3. "It's their preference"
In response to Reply # 0


          

Race determines a lot of things, but not a person's character and compatability.






We live in a world controlled by limitations,false values and morals,interrupted peace and mortal potential - our minds.

___________________________________________________


"This is what the sovereign Lord says: The people of Israel will again live in their own land, the land I gave my servant Jacob. For I will gather them from the distant lands where I have scattered

  

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Iplaydaorgan
Charter member
597 posts
Wed Jan-30-02 05:05 PM

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4. "RE: Peep Game"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

It's like this I think that WE as in brothas need to stay with our black sistas and I think that our sistas should stick with Us. I don't care about no other races (as closed minded as that is I don't even care)











U want some good shit jucwithis

U want some good shit fuckwitdis

  

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QUEENET

Sat Feb-02-02 09:34 AM

  
8. "RE: Peep Game/IPLAYDAORGAN"
In response to Reply # 4


          

iplaydaorgan I FEEL WHAT U SAYIN I WAS RAISED WITH THE SINCE OF STAYING IN MY OWN RACE EVEN THOUGH MY MOTHER IS MIXED I NEVER LOOKED AT ANYONE LIKE THAT OUTSIDE OF MY RACE JUST AT BROTHAS
QUEENET

  

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jenNjuice
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3527 posts
Sat Feb-02-02 07:40 PM

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18. "RE: Peep Game"
In response to Reply # 4


          

HELL YEAH!!!

"The only thing we wanted for our country was the right to a decent existence, to dignity without hypocrisy , to independence without restrictions... The day will come when history will have its say."-Lumumba

  

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Ximo
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Sun Feb-03-02 09:40 AM

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27. "RE: Peep Game"
In response to Reply # 4


          

> I don't care about no other races

i don't care about race at all, and you've got to admit that i have a bigger chance of meeting that special one with 3 billion possibles out there!! it's an open market baby, and all shades of the skin!!! but most like to stick to their kind, i respect that.

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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Kemet_Ibutho
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Sun Feb-03-02 12:51 PM

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40. "Word,"
In response to Reply # 4


          

i agree with that but i also think that a lot of Amerikkkan Blacks have a closed mind about who is and who isn't Black. i don't date outside of my race anymore (i did for a loooong time) but if i'm gonna be dating Black women i'm not gonna exclude a lot of people who have Black blood in them but just aren't considered Black by the masses. Puerto Ricans, Brazilians, Dominicans, etc...all sorts of people out there (especially in Latin America) have roots in Afraka. The way i see it Black people should stick to their race but we should also accept all our Afrakan-descneded brothas and sistas as who they are, not what people who labeled continents wanted them to be. One Love, Kemet Ibutho.




AIM: KemetShakur

Winston Churchill on the way to the British House of Commons...while drunk:
A woman approaches Winston in the hall.
Woman: "Sir, you are drunk!"
Winston: "Yes madam and you are ugly. The difference is tomorrow i will be sober."

Chris Rock: "Pootie can can kick so much ass he'll draw you a picture of how he's gonna kick your ass and send it to you 10 days ahead of time, you get it, you're like, "What the hell is this!?" Then he'll show up, whoop your ass, and you still won't know what happened to you."
Trucky:"Pootie Tang is a ass kicking artiste. He's like the DaVinci of ass kicking. Pootie Tang: the DaVinci of ass-kicking *with hand motions equatable to making a bill-board*.
Lacey:"Yah, and i'd just like to add, Pootie Tang can kick some ass too boi."
-Pootie's crew in Pootie Tang.

We can't have peace til the niggas get a piece too-Tupac Shakur "i wonder if heaven got a ghetto"

Wherever the negro face appears a tension is created, the tension of a silence filled with things unutterable-James Baldwin

i'll tell you this: there ain't no 'i' in team but there is an 'i' in "i smoked your ass". -Dude from that mixtape commercial

Says right there in the constitution..we the people..to uh, keep shit straight.....stop bothering me. -Jaime Foxx "bait"

Too many wanna be hard, be easy- Method Man"Da Rockwilder"

  

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bluesky
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Tue Feb-05-02 03:34 AM

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120. "RE: Peep Game"
In response to Reply # 4


          

thanks for that.....I agree and don't give a damn if it's closed-minded or not.

  

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praverbs
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5. "i don't care what any one else does..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

but i can only get involved with a sista *period*

call it what you want, but i'm only attracted (physically and spiritually) to our cocoabutta'd mothas.


*****¡ANNOUNCEMENTS!*****

-Vivrant for whatever Vivrant wants to be (i'm jumping on the pro-Vivrant bandwagon b/c i wanna be popular...like Vivrant).

-inbox me if you're an okayleftie. HottLykeFiyah, Kemet Ibutho, Edoggy, and seventy7 did, so you should too.

*****¡I AM! ¿ARE YOU?*****

"real niggas study conventional wisdom; real niggas shun conventional wisdom."-#'s 2 and 1 (respectively) of bonz malone's '10 real nigga rules for life' list.

*1/2 black, 1/2 amazin*

"¿you think you're afro-american? you're a 14th amendment and a good nigga."-ras kass. "nature of the threat".

*i'm the neo-nigga from the '90's*

"i'm black like don chedle screaming '¡power to the people!'"-mos def. "do it now".

*the wonderful thing about niggas, is niggas' a wonderful thing*

"¡i'm black y'all and i'm black y'all
and i'm blacker than black, and i'm black y'all
and i'm black y'all, and i'm black y'all
and i'm blacker than black, and i'm black y'all
i'm bliggeddy-black, blacker than black
black, i'm blacker than black
yo, because i'm black and i'm back
yo i'm black and i'm black y'all
and i'm blacker than black, and i'm black y'all
and i'm black y'all, and i'm black y'all
and i'm blackety black, and i'm black y'all
and i'm bliggeddy-black, black, black
black, aba-black
a black, black, black, black, black, black y'all
and i'm black y'all, and i'm black y'all
and i'm blacker than black cause i'm black!"
-dead mike. "i'm black y'all"

okayp'raverbs. GIVING YOU TRUE TRUTH SINCE...¿WHAT TIME IT IS?

« Slick Rick the Ruler in the Land of the Blind »

  

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M2
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Wed Jan-30-02 06:17 PM

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6. "If you believe in Soul Mates."
In response to Reply # 0


          

.....you probably believe in a Higher Power and it's ludicrous to think that Higher Power is going to send your Soul Mate in a package that you think is right, based on pre-conceived notions and societal influences....that in the overall scheme of things, aren't as important as people think.

I know plenty of people who insisted on marrying Catholic, Irish, Latino, Jewish, Asian and Black who regreted it later because they had met someone else they had a better connection with.

Anyway, if a Girl "gets me" that's my requirement...few women get me, I don't have the luxury of narrowing my choices down to race, complexion, religion, region (I'm West Indian..you can figure out the rest) or anything like that.



Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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Nick3x5
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Sat Feb-02-02 02:16 PM

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14. "RE: If you believe in Soul Mates."
In response to Reply # 6


          

i'd have to say i know how it feels being the minority.. where i live now.. i'm the only somewhat white person around (half colombian) everyone else is black... i'm started to understand how different spanish and black families live and the characteristics they have. i am completely for the mixing.. im a mix of irish and colombian and one other person comes to mind when i think of mixing and that is bob marley.. this father was white... a french soldier.... although if you want to get into being picky... i'd love to find a girl who is half black half white and jewish.... thats just me.....

  

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Asoyini
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Sat Feb-02-02 05:29 PM

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16. "RE: If you believe in Soul Mates."
In response to Reply # 14


          

Yeah but Bob Marley's "father" wasn't in his life nor did he play a central role in his development or upbringing. Personally I have been there and done that and it isn't for me. Give me a dark man full of melanin. Brothas have stood by me from day one and so as a sista I must stand by them. Whenever I have dated outside I never felt completely innerstood on certain issues that are of importance for me. I can't deny that reality.

>i'd have to say i know
>how it feels being the
>minority.. where i live now..
>i'm the only somewhat white
>person around (half colombian) everyone
>else is black... i'm started
>to understand how different spanish
>and black families live and
>the characteristics they have. i
>am completely for the mixing..
>im a mix of irish
>and colombian and one other
>person comes to mind when
>i think of mixing and
>that is bob marley.. this
>father was white... a french
>soldier.... although if you want
>to get into being picky...
>i'd love to find a
>girl who is half black
>half white and jewish.... thats
>just me.....


You be talkin' bout you want the war to cease but when you show soul we will show you peace!

AYANA SOYINI
Artist/DJ/Producer
Khamouflage Productions
www.facebook.com/djayanasoyini
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New single "A Dancing Mood" available now on iTunes & Amazon. Written and produced by Ayana Soyini.

  

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bluetiger
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36723 posts
Wed Jan-30-02 06:27 PM

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7. "Race = sub-species."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Sub-species generally produce infertile offspring as in the case of a mule. Humans procreate with each other & produce fertile offspring. There is only one race of humans. Maybe you should put forth your idea based on ethnicity or culture because race doesn't scientifically exist.

Thanks for reading. I Love You.

♀¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤♀

don't be fkn evil.

  

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QUEENET

Sat Feb-02-02 09:38 AM

  
9. "RE: Race = sub-species."
In response to Reply # 7


          

THANKS FOR DA KNOWLEDGE

  

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Ximo
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Sun Feb-03-02 10:31 AM

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31. "thanks for sharing n/m"
In response to Reply # 9


          


I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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Nettrice
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Sat Feb-02-02 10:44 AM

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11. "My ideals are changing"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I've always been disinterested as far as my personal life is concerned. Personally, I found it hard to believe that someone of another race would ever understand what it's like to be judged by skin color.

For example, I once had a close friendship with a white guy in college. We were in high school together, in Kentucky and he was a jr and I was a sr. I went away to college in New York City and he came a year later. We grew closer. His mother visited and she did something that offended me. We went out and I showed her all the sites in NYC. Afterwards she tried to give me money (like a tip), like I was not her son's friend but some servant who was being paid to take her out. He apologized but did not really understand how I felt. We slowly grew apart and went our separate ways.

For years after the college incident I had several friends who were non-Black but the relationships never got intimate. This changed recently. I met someone who was my social/intellectual/artistic equal and he has many of the non-physical qualities I'm looking for. Plus, there is a almost electric vibe between us. The whole situation is messing with me and forcing me to deal with my beliefs. He'll never know what it's like to be Black but he knows me and over the years I've learned to release fear and not take anything personally, esp. from racist or ignorant people.

The Nettrice of old would not have tolerated the current relationship but this is a new day and a new Nettrice. I don't care if people know what I've been through. They just need to affirm and love me.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"To be as good as someone else is no high ideal...I am myself." - Paul Robeson

"It's quite an experience to live in fear isn't it? That's what it is to be a slave." - Roy in "Blade Runner"

"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own."
--Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"

"There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path"
--Morpheus in "The Matrix" (and a Buddhist philosophy)

"It's our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities"- Dumbledore to Harry Potter "Chamber of Secrets"

<--- Blame this lady for Nutty.

  

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M2
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10072 posts
Sat Feb-02-02 07:55 PM

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20. "That's all that matters......"
In response to Reply # 11


          

> I don't care if
>people know what I've been
>through. They just need
>to affirm and love me.

If you "get me" and are on my wave length, that's all I can/dare ask for.

The older I get, the more I am amazed at the wide diversity social, economic, ethnic, family, and other backgrounds that people come from.....and the more I realize that as time moves on, it's ludicrous to think that just because someone shares your skin color, socio-economic status, family structure, religion or income...that they'll understand you.




Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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Solarus
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Sun Feb-03-02 05:58 AM

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21. "That's not the assumption"
In response to Reply # 20


  

          

Akwaaba

"the more I realize that as time moves on, it's ludicrous to think that just because someone shares your skin color, socio-economic status, family structure, religion or income...that they'll understand you."

The assumption is:

"If someone does not share your cultural worldview/backgorund/underpinnings they probably won't understand you nor be compatible with you."

SE wo werE fi na wosankofa a yenkyi.

Akoneaba ne agoro
solarICE

"So many of those who consider themselves Afrikan centered spend so much time on themselves that they forget that the primary role of the adult in our tradition was to raise the children to improve the society for their children."- Mwalimu Baruti

***Daily Affirmation***

i must be a warrior. i must be an Afrikan father. i must be self-full. i must challenge myself daily to grow, to love my people in and through action. To reflect that love at all times. To be optimistic. To know that victory is in front of US.

____________________________
"the real pyramids were built with such precision that you can't slide a piece of paper between two 4,000 lb stones, and have shafts perfectly aligned so that you can see a tiny aperture through dozens of these mammoth blocks

  

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M2
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Sun Feb-03-02 06:10 AM

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22. "okay......"
In response to Reply # 21


          

We said the same thing with different words (granted I had a typo)....but why state it twice..

In any event...I meant to say:

"as time goes on, I've become to realize that it's ludicrous to believe that just because someone shares your race, skin color, socio-economic background, religion, nationality, that they'll be compatible with or understand you"



Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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Solarus
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Sun Feb-03-02 07:05 PM

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48. "Not the same thing"
In response to Reply # 22


  

          

Akwaaba

The two statements have different implications.

"the more I realize that as time moves on, it's ludicrous to think that just because someone shares your skin color, socio-economic status, family structure, religion or income...that they'll understand you."

- This statement implies that if one is similar to another (based on what you stated above) then they will be compatible.

"If someone does not share your cultural worldview/backgorund/underpinnings they probably won't understand you nor be compatible with you."

- This statement implies that if one is not similar to another (based on what I stated above; note our points of commonality are decidedly different) then more than likely they will not be compatible. This statement does not assume that one will be understood or compatible with another of similar cultural background. It only assumes the inverse. Likewise your statement does not assume that if one is not similar to another then more than likely they will not be compatible

There is a distinct difference between our statements.

SE wo werE fi na wosankofa a yenkyi.

SE wo werE fi na wosankofa a yenkyi.

Akoneaba ne agoro
solarICE

"So many of those who consider themselves Afrikan centered spend so much time on themselves that they forget that the primary role of the adult in our tradition was to raise the children to improve the society for their children."- Mwalimu Baruti

***Daily Affirmation***

i must be a warrior. i must be an Afrikan father. i must be self-full. i must challenge myself daily to grow, to love my people in and through action. To reflect that love at all times. To be optimistic. To know that victory is in front of US.

____________________________
"the real pyramids were built with such precision that you can't slide a piece of paper between two 4,000 lb stones, and have shafts perfectly aligned so that you can see a tiny aperture through dozens of these mammoth blocks

  

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M2
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Sun Feb-03-02 09:10 PM

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51. "RE: Not the same thing"
In response to Reply # 48


          

>Akwaaba
>
>The two statements have different implications.
>
>
>"the more I realize that as
>time moves on, it's ludicrous
>to think that just because
>someone shares your skin color,
>socio-economic status, family structure, religion
>or income...that they'll understand you."
>
>
>- This statement implies that if
>one is similar to another
>(based on what you stated
>above) then they will be
>compatible.

Actually it doesn't, I said: "It's ludicrous to think" which means that it's silly/illogical to think someone will be compatible with/understand/"get you" just because they share socio-economic-cultural-racial underpinnings with you.

It says NOTHING about the inverse and if anything it says something that you'll be surprised at the backgrounds of the people who undestand you.



>"If someone does not share your
>cultural worldview/backgorund/underpinnings they probably won't
>understand you nor be compatible
>with you."
>
>- This statement implies that if
>one is not similar to
>another (based on what I
>stated above; note our points
>of commonality are decidedly different)
>then more than likely they
>will not be compatible.

By saying that people who aren't similar to you won't be compatible, your statement insinuates that in order to be compatible you DO have to be similar.....

.....an idea I dispute in my original statement.


In any event, since we're discussing the semantics of two statements and not the point of this thread.................








Peace,







M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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Nettrice
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Sun Feb-03-02 08:38 AM

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24. "RE: That's all that matters......"
In response to Reply # 20


  

          

I came to a point in my life where few people understood me...Black or other. I kept getting, "Well, that's you." or "Most people aren't like you." It was very frustrating. Usually I get nothing but respect from brothers and I love my Black culture. However, after 8 years, I have to admit that no one has really clicked with me. I refuse to be anything other than myself and if that's intimidating or threatening then so be it.

Last year, I fell in love with this brother from Miami. We met face-to-face and corresponded via email for a couple of months. When we met again he admitted he was in love with me. When I told him how I felt he backed off. He said he didn't think he deserved me. What?! We were in the same field of work, on the same level career-wise and financially. I had to detach, let him go.

I am already out in the world meeting people of different cultures and backgrounds. I live in a Jewish neighborhood, work in a Black neighborhood and get along with people regardless of ethnicity. What's funny to me is that I met and fell in love with a Jewish guy in a Black community. This relationship has challenged much of what I thought I was capable of.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"To be as good as someone else is no high ideal...I am myself." - Paul Robeson

"It's quite an experience to live in fear isn't it? That's what it is to be a slave." - Roy in "Blade Runner"

"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own."
--Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"

"There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path"
--Morpheus in "The Matrix" (and a Buddhist philosophy)

"It's our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities"- Dumbledore to Harry Potter "Chamber of Secrets"

<--- Blame this lady for Nutty.

  

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LexM
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Mon Feb-04-02 08:18 AM

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61. "getting there myself..."
In response to Reply # 24


  

          

>I came to a point in
>my life where few people
>understood me...Black or other.
>I kept getting, "Well, that's
>you." or "Most people aren't
>like you." It was
>very frustrating. Usually I
>get nothing but respect from
>brothers and I love my
>Black culture. However, after
>8 years, I have to
>admit that no one has
>really clicked with me.
>I refuse to be anything
>other than myself and if
>that's intimidating or threatening then
>so be it.

I think I'm entering a similar phase in my life, and it's rather frightening...but it makes me more aware of not limiting my choice of who I wind up with.

I would prefer to marry/connect with a Black man. But if that doesn't happen, I'm open to new ideas. The most important thing, like you said, is that they understand me and we can build something together. That's hard enough to find without worrying about color.


_________________________________________________________
"Two centuries ago, a former European colony decided to catch up with Europe. It succeeded so well that the United States of America became a monster, in which the sickness, and the inhumanity of Europe have grown to appalling dimensions." ~~Frantz Fanon

"In the twenty-first century, Christianity, Islam and Judaism are still dominated by unenlightened males of every race in the East and in the West. Until women are truly heard in the church, the mosque, and the synagogue, the feminine expression of the Divine Attributes of the Creator cannot be experienced, and war will ultimately destroy most of humanity." ~~Min. Ava Muhammad

need a hero? http://www.gettosake.com

wanna say hi? AIM: LadyDay78

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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M2
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Mon Feb-04-02 10:14 AM

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86. "Already There......"
In response to Reply # 61


          

...I'm 26.....


....and I'm feeling as if I have less and less in common with people my age, I'm not connecting them career wise, mentally or developing a deep personal connection...nor do I meet people who "get me"......I can connect with people on a "friend" level but in terms of becoming close friends, having a deep bond and connecting mentally...it's just not happening.

I've met women in their 30s with whom I could connect with or with whom I see common ground, but they're usually always involved with someone......

I will say that being a consultant who travels, it's harder for me to make connections with people....which just means that if I do find someone, it's probably going to be a long distance relationship.

Not holding my breath though.......





Peace,





M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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LexM
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28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:37 AM

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89. "damn"
In response to Reply # 86


  

          

so much for the future

lol

but i feel u. i'm a firm believer in, "when it's right, it'll happen". i've got some other things to get straight first.

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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kemetian
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Sun Feb-03-02 07:03 PM

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47. "That almost happened to me once"
In response to Reply # 11


  

          

w/ a first generation Irish person. But i could not allow it to continue to get a point where those feelings became strong b/c i have made a commitment to my people. i feel like everything i do is an example that i am setting. i feel like everything i do sends a message. so it is not enough for me to say i love my people but when it comes to the person i share my sacred space w/ i send the message that no member of my people was good enough. that to me is unacceptable and hypocritical. i believe that u won't find love where u don't go looking for it and just as a anything less than an 'A' is unacceptable for me in this time in school, anybody other than an African is unacceptable for me.

also my mate should share the vision i have for Us as a people and i just can't c that an other would be able to share that or y they should.

but that's me.


>I've always been disinterested as far
>as my personal life is
>concerned. Personally, I found
>it hard to believe that
>someone of another race would
>ever understand what it's like
>to be judged by skin
>color.
>
>For example, I once had a
>close friendship with a white
>guy in college. We
>were in high school together,
>in Kentucky and he was
>a jr and I was
>a sr. I went
>away to college in New
>York City and he came
>a year later. We
>grew closer. His mother
>visited and she did something
>that offended me. We
>went out and I showed
>her all the sites in
>NYC. Afterwards she tried
>to give me money (like
>a tip), like I was
>not her son's friend but
>some servant who was being
>paid to take her out.
> He apologized but did
>not really understand how I
>felt. We slowly grew
>apart and went our separate
>ways.
>
>For years after the college incident
>I had several friends who
>were non-Black but the relationships
>never got intimate. This
>changed recently. I met
>someone who was my social/intellectual/artistic
>equal and he has many
>of the non-physical qualities I'm
>looking for. Plus, there
>is a almost electric vibe
>between us. The whole
>situation is messing with me
>and forcing me to deal
>with my beliefs. He'll
>never know what it's like
>to be Black but he
>knows me and over the
>years I've learned to release
>fear and not take anything
>personally, esp. from racist or
>ignorant people.
>
>The Nettrice of old would not
>have tolerated the current relationship
>but this is a new
>day and a new Nettrice.
> I don't care if
>people know what I've been
>through. They just need
>to affirm and love me.
>
>
>* * * * * *
>* * * * *
>* * * * *
>* * * * *
>
>"To be as good as someone
>else is no high ideal...I
>am myself." - Paul Robeson
>
>
>"It's quite an experience to live
>in fear isn't it?
>That's what it is to
>be a slave." - Roy
>in "Blade Runner"
>
>"Everyone seems to have a clear
>idea of how other people
>should lead their lives, but
>none about his or her
>own."
>--Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"
>
>"There is a difference between knowing
>the path and walking the
>path"
>--Morpheus in "The Matrix" (and a
>Buddhist philosophy)
>
>"It's our choices, Harry, that show
>what we truly are, far
>more than our abilities"- Dumbledore
>to Harry Potter "Chamber of
>Secrets"


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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Nettrice
Charter member
61747 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 04:43 AM

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56. "RE: That almost happened to me once"
In response to Reply # 47


  

          

I know a Haitian woman who fell in love with a Jewish guy and after they started living together he asked her to stay in the basement whenever his family came over (true story). Although she did not continue to live with this guy she claims she knows he still loves her. I knew a few other stories like this one but I know these relationships were not about love.

#1 Love is transcendent. It's not about something as subjective as culture or race but people are often conditioned to believe that appearances mean something. A Black woman can hate her color, her community and marry a Black man only because it seems appropriate. Another Black woman can marry a white man for the same reason except she is so focused on race that she sees her interracial relationship as better. True love goes beyond the external. We as Black women can hide behind what is appropriate or "better" but we can't hide from ourselves.

#2 Love is peaceful and life affirming. If I am with a man and I am able to see him without seeing his race AND I feel a sense of peace when I am with him then I may feel love.

For years, I was attached to appearing Black or representing and even though I am still serving Black communities I recognize that my life is not defined by what others think or feel. No one else has to live with my relationship(s) but me.

Love is timeless, freeing, soul-based, and about real unity. Love is unconditional. I want to feel needed for who I am. I want to feel safe, profound, light, wild, strong, and connected spiritually. When I look at myself I seldom see race. I see Nettrice. When I look at my mate I want to see them for whoever they are, not their race. Love allows my mate the freedom to be unlike me. Love imposes no demands and expands beyond the limits of society.

If someone wants a message they can go to Western Union (I heard that somewhere). I wake up almost everyday and serve the Black community. I lovingly give 8 hours of my life a day to serve my people. When I go home I am serving me.

Finally, my best friend traveled to Boston from New York City to meet this white guy I fell in love with. She's no supporter of interracial relationships, either, but she was impressed by what she saw as real love between two people. I had managed to find someone who respected me, listened to every word I said and seemed committed to maintain a close but professional relationship. I haven't crossed that line with him but I've come close. I may never enter in a intimate relationship with this white guy but he's taught me to seek out the love I know exists for me.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"To be as good as someone else is no high ideal...I am myself." - Paul Robeson

"It's quite an experience to live in fear isn't it? That's what it is to be a slave." - Roy in "Blade Runner"

"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own."
--Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"

"There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path"
--Morpheus in "The Matrix" (and a Buddhist philosophy)

"It's our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities"- Dumbledore to Harry Potter "Chamber of Secrets"

<--- Blame this lady for Nutty.

  

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kemetian
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Mon Feb-04-02 07:26 AM

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57. "i read that in this month's essence"
In response to Reply # 56


  

          


>If someone wants a message they
>can go to Western Union
>(I heard that somewhere).


a woman was quoting i think Hemingway. i think that's a way 4 ppl to ignore the fact that they r sending a message in everything they do to absolve themselves of the responsibility that that acknowledgement carries.


>I wake up almost everyday
>and serve the Black community.
> I lovingly give 8
>hours of my life a
>day to serve my people.
> When I go home
>I am serving me.

how r u different from your ppl. i mena in serving yourself don't u serve your ppl as well? i guess i don't understand how u split it up like that. "what i'm doing over here is for them and this is for me, one does not relate to another." that's what it sounds like to me. is that what u mean?

>Finally, my best friend traveled to
>Boston from New York City
>to meet this white guy
>I fell in love with.

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?"

> I had
>managed to find someone who
>respected me, listened to every
>word I said and seemed
>committed to maintain a close
>but professional relationship.

how did u "find" this person? what tactics (4 want of a better word, that sounds desperate i know) were u using to locate a person b4 that didn't work that u changed and now did? or were u not "looking?" was it like accident, like falling into a hole or something, did it occur quite by happenstance? and when u discuss issues of race, how does that go? how does he affirm your africanness?

i was talking to someone who told me of a family member who recently divorced his white wife. for all intents and purposes she was a "good woman," looked after the children, faithful etc. but he said in terms of his africanness, especially as he beagn to read more, he found that she just saw it as something to tolerate. plus there was the problem of white privelege, that exclusive club she was born into, that he would never be "a part" of.

i found these culural differences affected the way i and the person i referred to looked at everyday situations. it was sort of a little thing bugging me, constantly in the back of my head.

anyway enough talk of bugs. thanks for indulging me.

I
>haven't crossed that line with
>him but I've come close.
> I may never enter
>in a intimate relationship with
>this white guy but he's
>taught me to seek out
>the love I know exists
>for me.
>
>* * * * * *
>* * * * *
>* * * * *
>* * * * *
>
>"To be as good as someone
>else is no high ideal...I
>am myself." - Paul Robeson
>
>
>"It's quite an experience to live
>in fear isn't it?
>That's what it is to
>be a slave." - Roy
>in "Blade Runner"
>
>"Everyone seems to have a clear
>idea of how other people
>should lead their lives, but
>none about his or her
>own."
>--Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"
>
>"There is a difference between knowing
>the path and walking the
>path"
>--Morpheus in "The Matrix" (and a
>Buddhist philosophy)
>
>"It's our choices, Harry, that show
>what we truly are, far
>more than our abilities"- Dumbledore
>to Harry Potter "Chamber of
>Secrets"


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23


Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:36 AM

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65. "that's what worries me"
In response to Reply # 57


  

          

>i was talking to someone who
>told me of a family
>member who recently divorced his
>white wife. for all
>intents and purposes she was
>a "good woman," looked after
>the children, faithful etc. but
>he said in terms of
>his africanness, especially as he
>beagn to read more, he
>found that she just saw
>it as something to tolerate.
> plus there was the
>problem of white privelege, that
>exclusive club she was born
>into, that he would never
>be "a part" of.

things like that would always be in the back of my mind if i married/dated someone white. on the other hand, if they were a part of another minority group, the differences might be more cultural--e.g. a language barrier--but at least they'd be more likely to understand the ideas of being held to a stereotype, discrimination, etc.

but do you think that changes if you marry a european vs. a white american? europeans aren't necessarily inundated with the same concepts of race. a white person from another country might be a lot easier to relate to than a white american.

_________________________________________________________
"Two centuries ago, a former European colony decided to catch up with Europe. It succeeded so well that the United States of America became a monster, in which the sickness, and the inhumanity of Europe have grown to appalling dimensions." ~~Frantz Fanon

"In the twenty-first century, Christianity, Islam and Judaism are still dominated by unenlightened males of every race in the East and in the West. Until women are truly heard in the church, the mosque, and the synagogue, the feminine expression of the Divine Attributes of the Creator cannot be experienced, and war will ultimately destroy most of humanity." ~~Min. Ava Muhammad

need a hero? http://www.gettosake.com

wanna say hi? AIM: LadyDay78

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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guerilla_love
Charter member
8273 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:42 AM

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67. "europeans"
In response to Reply # 65


          

u'd be surprised..................


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:44 AM

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70. "believe me"
In response to Reply # 67


  

          

i'm sure i wouldn't

but the question's been posed to me before.


_________________________________________________________
"Two centuries ago, a former European colony decided to catch up with Europe. It succeeded so well that the United States of America became a monster, in which the sickness, and the inhumanity of Europe have grown to appalling dimensions." ~~Frantz Fanon

"In the twenty-first century, Christianity, Islam and Judaism are still dominated by unenlightened males of every race in the East and in the West. Until women are truly heard in the church, the mosque, and the synagogue, the feminine expression of the Divine Attributes of the Creator cannot be experienced, and war will ultimately destroy most of humanity." ~~Min. Ava Muhammad

need a hero? http://www.gettosake.com

wanna say hi? AIM: LadyDay78

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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guerilla_love
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Mon Feb-04-02 09:04 AM

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75. "i've heard it a lot too"
In response to Reply # 70


          

but u know with my united nations posse........


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:37 AM

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80. "lol yeah..."
In response to Reply # 75


  

          

can u blame us?

just lookin for somebody in the world who doesn't hate us 'cause we're brown




~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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guerilla_love
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8273 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:43 AM

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81. "i'm always amazed"
In response to Reply # 80


          

at where ignorance leads......

and how ignorant people are......

really i think in this case its more fetishism than hate. but would u find yr soulmate if he licked u in a club to see if u tasted like chocolate?


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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M2
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10072 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:50 AM

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82. "Depends....."
In response to Reply # 67


          

...some Europeans bring a concept a race native to their country.....some adopt the concept they learn in the US.

I dated a european (3 1/2 years) whose concept was the former it was cool, it was a different experience...I was M2 to her, yes I was Black..but at the end of the day I was just M2......

.....people in this country think about race so much, that you really don't always get that from Black people.



Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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guerilla_love
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8273 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:15 AM

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87. "as yr relationship progresses"
In response to Reply # 82


          

u encounter different things. with each new encounter u learn more about yr mate

saying someone sees u for u is a first impressiony and kinda empty thing

these dynamics run very deep, and something wil come up one day and u'll realize, u're u with yr views, and they're themselves with theirs

european does not mean safe and functionally can be a very similar experience to dating an american


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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M2
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10072 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:37 AM

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90. "RE: as yr relationship progresses"
In response to Reply # 87


          

>u encounter different things. with each
>new encounter u learn more
>about yr mate

Okay....but that's not dependent on their race.

>saying someone sees u for u
>is a first impressiony and
>kinda empty thing

Not it isn't......it means they see all of me, not just "part" of me.

I'm very complex, ask 8 different people to describe me and you'll get 8 different answers...but she saw all of me, that's what I mean by someone who sees me for me..she sees all of who I am, not parts of it or an empty image.

E.g.

Girls I meet in the Gym have a tendency to think I'm vain, critical of my body and will probably be critical of theirs....if they're not in great physical condition. However, I'm nothing like that, I'm not vain....and some of the sexiest looking women I know, don't look like the cast of ESPNs body shaping.

To people at work, I'm a very dedicated, driven, hard working and serious individual. I may crack a joke now and then, but no one is going to give me the award for the office jokester. They also see me as being very conservative, both in politics and tastes.

BUT, when they discuss politics with me or get to know me....they find out that my work persona is just a sliver of my true self.

I act serious at work, but I can be quite silly in off hours...and my politics and tastes are nowhere near as conservative as most people think.

When Black people meet me they think that I'm "the oreo" the "sell out" and/or they try to superimpose their idea of what an "Educated Black Man" should be/should be doing......

As they get to know me, they find their assumptions are proven wrong.....

The point is that, seeing me for ME is neither shallow or first impression based....it's seeing beyond the assumptions one makes of me, based on the context in which you meet me.






>these dynamics run very deep, and
>something wil come up one
>day and u'll realize, u're
>u with yr views, and
>they're themselves with theirs

That's true with anyone.


>european does not mean safe and
>functionally can be a very
>similar experience to dating an
>american

Perhaps, but it my experience it hasn't been.....if I end up with a White Person long term, I doubt they'll be American.





Peace,






M2



The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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guerilla_love
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Tue Feb-05-02 03:09 AM

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117. "clarification"
In response to Reply # 90


          

>>u encounter different things. with each
>>new encounter u learn more
>>about yr mate
>
>Okay....but that's not dependent on their race.

not *dependent on*
race is one element that will come up at some point
like what happens when a friend of theirs is uncomfortable when u come over? or someone in their family starts to tell u how they think black people are so sexy? what happens when he wants to play with your hair but hasn't encountered black hair/styles before? what happens if he's intimidated by your family? what about when a salesperson is reluctant to serve u? when u stay at a motel and discover that the next room is occupied by some rowdy rednecks? when u're always the token person at family events and thus stared at strangely always? when he wants to go travel to a country that has a strong white power movement for a romantic vacation, unaware of that country's dynamics (eg the danish countryside)?

what happens when u're in a longterm relationship and u share family and u share friends

the differences that stem from racial tension run deeeeeeeeep. there is no way u cd not encounter them. and when u do, u learn more and more about the person u're with.

and u will encounter differences at some point.


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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M2
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10072 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 03:08 PM

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148. "Don't dispute my reality"
In response to Reply # 117


          

I'm just telling you my experiences with my last girlfriend....as well as general trends I've noticed with other girls I've dated and via what my cousins (Dad's side of the family is from England) have told me.

Salesmen, Bad Service, Rowdy Rednecks....that's going to happen to me no matter who I date. But for the most part, I've managed to avoid it.

People saying "Black People are Sexy" trying to feel your hair...that depends on the person....never had that with europeans, only with Americans.....again just relating my experience.

Travel, I like to travel and they're racist people everywhere....but based on my experiences people are much more racist in the US...I feel more comfortable in the UK and other parts of Europe then I do various parts of the midwestern and southern US.

But that's just me.

As for our families, I don't care...I really don't....we're dating each other...not each other's families. BUT, it was never a problem in our case....again just relating my experience.

FWIW, I and my sibs have dated Black people where our families didn't get along....and have dated Whites where our families got along swimmingly (Like my sister). Therefore....it's not a concern with me when I date Whites....or Blacks for that matter.

One thing: European countries (and people) vary wildly....some europeans may react with you in the same way Americans do, some may not....it depends. In my experience though, I'd prefer to date European Whites then American Whites.

Anyway, I'm not saying you're wrong....I'm just saying that in my experience...relationships with Europeans have gone well.




Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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guerilla_love
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8273 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 03:26 AM

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152. "RE: Don't dispute my reality"
In response to Reply # 148


          

>Salesmen, Bad Service, Rowdy Rednecks....that's going
>to happen to me no matter who I date. But

i'm not saying that these happen because u date outside of yr race. i'm saying that they will probably have consequences that may reach into yr relationship

>for the most part, I've managed to avoid it.

that's not relevant to my point.

>People saying "Black People are Sexy"
>trying to feel your hair...that
>depends on the person....never had
>that with europeans, only with
>Americans.....again just relating my experience.

depends on where in europe u go. try iceland, for example. or the swedish countryside.

>Travel, I like to travel and
>they're racist people everywhere....but based
>on my experiences people are much more racist in the
>US...I feel more comfortable in

racism manifests itself in different ways in europe. on the surface, it's a utopia. seeing the surface differences really had a profound affect on me. but digging deeper i was dissapointed-

>But that's just me.

everyone has a completely individual set of circumstances and experiences. i'm not trying to impose mine on u so much as show u that in every relationship there are differences to reckon out, and in an interracial or intercultural (very different elements) relationship, these differences will be one element that will need to be reckoned out. and nobody/no relationship is exempt from that.

>As for our families, I don't
>care...I really don't....we're dating each
>other...not each other's families. BUT,

i suppose this is more of a concern when u're married and sharing family- which is a different ballpark altogether and really the stadium that i'm concentrating on-

>FWIW, I and my sibs have dated Black people where our
>families didn't get along....and have
>dated Whites where our families got along swimmingly (Like my
>sister). Therefore....it's not a concern
>with me when I date Whites....or Blacks for that matter.

i'm talking deeper than that. again, i'm talking on the level of marriage- of sharing family- if one or both person/s in the relationship is attached to their family/values family strongly and even one member of their family has a problem with the mix, it'll be a huuuuuge and very emotional time to face.

and even if these values don't surface in the dating relationship, they often surface with marriage talk and child talk etc etc etc

>One thing: European countries (and people)
>vary wildly....some europeans may react
>with you in the same way Americans do, some may
>not....it depends.

absolutely europe varies greatly. and absolutely tehre are more offensive reactions that just the american way.

>In my experience though, I'd prefer to date European Whites then American Whites.

i think what u really mean to say id different from what u say here

>Anyway, I'm not saying you're wrong....I'm
>just saying that in my
>experience...relationships with Europeans have gone well.

it seems to me that the europeans i meet are more innocent and genuine about race issues- they don't have the same racist cultural bombardment that americans do

but they do have a certain degree of their own breeds of bombardment

and don't forget the many holocausts that happened in europe and the visible fascist and white power forces that are growing power nowadays (mostly growing from rural to urban areas)


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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Ximo
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351 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 04:39 AM

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153. "europe?"
In response to Reply # 152


          

can i ask you where in yurop you've been?

>depends on where in europe u
>go. try iceland, for example.
>or the swedish countryside.

you just managed to pick two most isolated spots in europe
i don't know about iceland, but the scandinavian countryside (and countries in general) are really not where you'd want to go in europe if you're not scandinavian (in general).

>... but digging deeper i was dissapointed-

you must have dug in the wrong places.. did you mention denmark earlier?

>and don't forget the many holocausts
>that happened in europe and
>the visible fascist and white
>power forces that are growing
>power nowadays (mostly growing from
>rural to urban areas)

you're right about that, but you can't put that "danger" label on all european countries! you are talking about countries such as sweden, denmark, norway, switzerland and germany, which are all VERY nationalistic and troubled by a growing neo nazi movement. i'm saying this as a person from norway, where what you hear about immigrants (mostly middle eastern & african) is almost always negative.

what i'm saying is that the countries i mentioned are probably the most nationalistic countries in europe! what about uk, france, spain? i'm from norway, been living in spain for 1 1/2 year now, and let me tell you that the difference between the two cultures (norway and spain) are enourmous! although spain has its problems with immigration (ala the mexican border), racism is very little - africans are not looked upon as something else.

<sig>
"Today’s real borders are not between nations, but between powerful
and powerless, free and fettered, privileged and humiliated" -
"I went to school for 14 years and my best teacher was experience" -
-
</sig>

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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guerilla_love
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Wed Feb-06-02 04:50 AM

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154. "uk, france, spain"
In response to Reply # 153


          

last time i was in the uk there was a van driving around with a megaphone spouting nationalist rhetoric

dunno too much abt spain- been a long time

considering france's history with algerians, i know they're no heros

i just mentioned those particular places offhand because i have friends/family in both that i'm in heavy contact with


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

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BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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Ximo
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351 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 08:55 AM

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133. "europeans"
In response to Reply # 90


          

and when did "european" become a race? you can't place all us europeans in one cathegory, there are so many different cultures if you look beyond the GWB asslicking governments you'll find racism everywhere on earth, but usa must be the country that is most plagued with racism.

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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M2
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10072 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:20 AM

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88. "Methinks...."
In response to Reply # 57


          

....you are too caught up in sending a message in everything you do.

What makes you think people are neccessarily paying attention?

and/or

What if their perception of said message/action is wrong? E.g. If someone thinks you're thoughts are less valid because you are with a White Woman, or that you must've rejected Black women to be with her....who has the problem you or them?

Why is it someone's responsibility to do things for the sake of "appearence & sending a message" and not for themselves?

Just because you are with a White person doesn't mean that you're neccessarily "rejecting" Black people..it just means that the white person was the first to connect with you....it's not more rejection of Black Women....then dating a particular Black woman means that you're neccessarily rejected other Black women.


In other words, you take yourself waaaaaaaay too seriously.


Peace,




M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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kemetian
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1336 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 04:45 AM

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122. "MESSAGES"
In response to Reply # 88


  

          

>....you are too caught up in
>sending a message in everything
>you do.


i don't think so, i am AWARE that i send a message in everything i do. ppl can choose to ignore this fact. ppl observe all the time, adults, children. every time u have a thought based on something u have seen, a behavior u have seen acted out, whether it's a mother caressing her child's head, or berating him in a public place, to's because that person has sent u a message, not just the Little One she has had contact with. some messages are small some are big. i have chosen not to absolve myself of the responsibility to those who came b4 and those to come. in trying to be a good person, that has certain implications for the way i behave, hence the MESSAGES i send.



>What makes you think people are
>neccessarily paying attention?

ppl tell me they are. when ppl come up to me out of the blue and make a remark about something i have said, or worn or my hair, it tells me that ppl are watching. when children smile @ me i know they are watching. sometimes they don't, verbally. but i know. this is not to say i act a certain just b/c i think ppl might be looking, and then i act differently when i think they are not looking, i am just AWARE that everything i do sends a message. u should try it once, go thruout the day being acutely aware of the mesages u r sending. then think about whether those messages are good or bad, 2 u.

>and/or
>
>What if their perception of said
>message/action is wrong? E.g. If
>someone thinks you're thoughts are
>less valid because you are
>with a White Woman, or
>that you must've rejected Black
>women to be with her....who
>has the problem you or
>them?

that's a good question. i don't have any control over how ppl interpret the messages i send. but i can tell u this: PPL will NEVER be able to get THAT particular message from me b/c that's not a message i should to send, by SELECTING someone from w/in my race. now as far as thinking your thoughts are less valid... in what setting would your thoughts be thought less valid if u were w/ a White Woman? here is an example, if there is a forum on restoring marriages between Black men an dBlack Women, u don't think ppl are corect in thinking your thoughts are less valid, seeing that u have made no attempt tp be in that situation.

better yet, we r both engineers right? i am an electrical and computer engineer. if we are having a discussion on the characteristic of a Zener Diode and whether or not we should use it in our particular device, and a phys. ed. major walks up and wants to give his/her input, don't u think we might think that the phys. ed's thoughts are less valid, seeing that s/he is not an electrical engineer and would not know that Ohm's Law is of no use to us in this case? that knowledge comes form the experienc eof being an electrical engineering major, one which the phys. ed. major does not share.


in such a case i can understand y your thoughts might be thought of as less valid. u have made the decision that u will pursue your "personal happiness" and not be botherd w/ the message u have chosen to send. if u have a problem w/ messages u r sending then it is YOU who has the problem.


>Why is it someone's responsibility to
>do things for the sake
>of "appearence & sending a
>message" and not for themselves?


again, i am AWARE that i am sending a message. if u do things for the sake of appearance u will send that message too, b/c your actions when u think no one is looking will reflect otherwise. so i don't want u to think that that is what i am saying. i am not talking about doing things for the sake of appearance. i am talking about being AWARE of how u appear.

as far as "self" goes, i'm not quite sure i get u... when i talk about sending a clear message of solidarity w/ my ppl i do it for myself too, i don't really see a distinction. when we are all doing well, necessarily i am doing well.


>
>Just because you are with a
>White person doesn't mean that
>you're neccessarily "rejecting" Black people..

well u have actually, in a way. your spouse should be the person closest to u. this is the peron who will help to carry on your name, your spouse is someone to whom have entrusted a great responsibility, particularly if she is a woman.

now u in your mind may not feel any less close to Black ppl, but the message u have sent is, whether or not u like it, i have chosen not to entrust this responsibility to a black woman, i have chosen not to have a black woman closest to me (it's digital: White=Not Black), to share my space with. when i have gone thru the hardships of the day i want to relax in the arms of a white woman (or _this_ white woman, if u prefer), not a black, asian, hispanic, arab, indian... but the woman in whose arms i will find solace: a white woman. now given our history, white women and black women, white men and black men, this goes beyond the simplicity w/ which u speak above , b/c whether u like it or not the message u r sending is "i would rather be w/ a member of the oppressor's race than w/ my family." of course in your mind, u are only pursuing your own personal happiness, but that does not mean that u r not sending a message in doing so.
i don't expect that this will go over very well, but that's the message i chose to send, i am aware of it and i stick w/ it.



it
>just means that the white
>person was the first to
>connect with you....it's not more
>rejection of Black Women....then dating
>a particular Black woman means
>that you're neccessarily rejected other
>Black women.

well, u'd have to tell me what u mean by connect. y don't u tell me what it would take for someone to 'connect' with u. then u should also realize that 'connections' can grow. sometimes there is no 'connection' at all and one develops. sometimes there is an instant connection like that! sometimes we have instant connections w/ ppl who are not necessarily good for us. this has implications for the way we go about finding a "soulmate." perhaps God has placed in us the ability to 'connect' w/ just about anyone over time, so that we don't have to worry about that, we can instead pay attn to what some might consider more mundane things...

>In other words, you take yourself
>waaaaaaaay too seriously.

u know i don't think u believe this.
when u asked this question:

"Why is it someone's responsibility to
do things for the sake
of "appearence & sending a
message" and not for themselves? "

u reminded of a frustrated student who says "but it's too hard!"

>Peace,
>
>
>
>
>M2

and to u...

Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 04:49 AM

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123. "typos"
In response to Reply # 122


  

          

... whether it's
>a mother caressing her child's
>head, or berating him in
>a public place, it's because
>that person has sent u
>a message,...

>that's a good question. i don't
>have any control over how
>ppl interpret the messages i
>send. but i can tell
>u this: PPL will NEVER
>be able to get THAT
>particular message from me b/c
>that's not a message i
will ever send, by SELECTING
>someone from w/in my race.



Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 04:13 PM

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193. "RE: MESSAGES"
In response to Reply # 122


          

I still think you're too concerned about sending messages with your actions, as opposed to doing what's best for you.

I'm not saying you should be with someone who isn't Black, but I don't think one should spend too much time pondering the message his/her actions are going to send to other people...since these "people" can interpret your actions in hundreds of ways you can't imagine.

AND, people may perceive a message from your actions....but what makes you think it won't be a passing perception that won't have any affect on their lives?

Why do you think you dating a Black person is going to have an effect on someone's life?

You mention god, connections and soulmates. What makes you think that God is concerned about race and has sent you soulmate down to earth as a Black person?

As for validity of one's opinions, two Electrical Engineers have a knowledge base about diodes that a Political Science major simply doesn't....since they don't know anything about Diodes. Anyone in a relationship, knows something about relationships...any Black person has something to offer to a conversation about Black marriages because being Black will give them insight to the issues those people may face.....regardless of who/what they're dating....

As for marriages and spouses, I think people take that waaaaaaaaaaay to seriously. A relationship is a relationship....two people who have an intimate bond and want to spend their lives together. Issues with respect to how others perceive it aren't relevant, YOU have to love this person....not anyone else. As for trust and the rest....if you have an intimate bond, you should be able to trust that person....if you can't, then you're not really all that close.

Personally, I think a lot of people are blowing this issue waay out of porportion because they are considering what other people think (not relevant) and placing lots of social and spiritual ramifications on marriage that don't exist.



Peace,







M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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Nettrice
Charter member
61747 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 12:59 PM

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95. "RE: i read that in this month's essence"
In response to Reply # 57


  

          

>a woman was quoting i think
>Hemingway. i think that's a
>way 4 ppl to ignore
>the fact that they r
>sending a message in everything
>they do to absolve themselves
>of the responsibility that that
>acknowledgement carries.

I think in the magazine the playwright was talking about the process or freedom of creating art (I got the quote there). As an artist and leader vision is critical. The message lies in the vision and people can align themselves with it or not. Not everyone is a visionary but everyone should look for people with vision as a model. Being Black is not my vision. This was the label and culture I became part of at birth but does not speak to the purpose I was born with. My responsibility is starting from my corner and finding ways to do work that supports my vision and serves others at the same time. Freedom lies in the fact that I don't need people's approval to do the work, live my life but I can do work that helps Black people empower themselves, as well as fulfill my goals. Therein lies responsibility (response-ability).

>how r u different from your
>ppl. i mena in serving
>yourself don't u serve your
>ppl as well? i guess
>i don't understand how u
>split it up like that.

As I stated above, I was born into being Black, or being part of Black culture. I am self first. I was born with Divine purpose and that's outside of my membership to the Black community, the African Diaspora. Part of who I am is my culture/community but I am more than that. I have a purpose. When I work with people I do not see color. I see intention. Nothing is separate, everything is part of the grand thoroughfare of life. By serving my purpose/vision I am serving others.

>"If the essence of 'love'... is
>giving
>selflessly or sacrificing for others,
>how can it then be equated
>with
>something that you can 'fall into
>or
>out of'?"

Love has four steps: attraction, infatuation, commitment and maintenence (sp?) The falling in love part brings my attention to the first two steps. I am attracted and I am in love. Sometimes it goes no further than that but there are times when me and my mate try at commitment. I haven't gotten to the point that maintaining the relationship is an issue. Love is everywhere but sometimes there is a connection that brings people closer and sometimes that's when I fall in love.

>how did u "find" this person?
>what tactics (4 want of
>a better word, that sounds
>desperate i know) were u
>using to locate a person

That's just it. I did not locate him at all. He was just there, 3-4 days per week, for a year. I go to work and I go home. Sometimes I mentor a 9 year old or go to the movies or hang out with friends but the only way for people to really get access to me is through my work. One day I became aware that I was attracted and then I became infatuated...

>b4 that didn't work that
>u changed and now did?
>or were u not "looking?"
>was it like accident, like
>falling into a hole or
>something, did it occur quite
>by happenstance? and when
>u discuss issues of race,
>how does that go? how
>does he affirm your africanness?

When I talk about race he listens and tells me what he thinks, esp. tuning into my personal feelings. For example, I once talked about some of the challenges I had to deal with as a Black woman in my field, as a leader and he responded, "So that must make you angry." At the time I wasn't angry but I was encouraged to work through those emotions. The solutions are already in me. Last week we discussed street smarts...in Roxbury, from my p.o.v., his p.o.v. and some teens experiences. It was about sharing and listening. He affirms Nettrice and that's more personal and real than Africa as a whole. He knows me. He does not know other people.

I already think I am privileged (sort of), more like worthy of whatever affirms my life and spirit. I don't need an extension of me or to be attached to anyone. I am looking for a spiritual partner, not a crutch or father figure.

Maybe I will meet a brother who is what I am looking for but until that happens I am living my life, patient but not waiting, ready to accept what the universe sends me.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"To be as good as someone else is no high ideal...I am myself." - Paul Robeson

"It's quite an experience to live in fear isn't it? That's what it is to be a slave." - Roy in "Blade Runner"

"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own."
--Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"

"There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path"
--Morpheus in "The Matrix" (and a Buddhist philosophy)

"It's our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities"- Dumbledore to Harry Potter "Chamber of Secrets"

<--- Blame this lady for Nutty.

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:43 AM

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68. "hmmm"
In response to Reply # 47


  

          

>i feel like everything i
>do sends a message.
>so it is not enough
>for me to say i
>love my people but when
>it comes to the person
>i share my sacred space
>w/ i send the message
>that no member of my
>people was good enough. that
>to me is unacceptable and
>hypocritical.

i'm finding that the older i get, the more difficult it is to find brothas on my level. and i'm not that old, nor am i far along in my career (i don't even really have one yet...lol. but i'm doing well enough to support myself).

i'm noticing a marked difference in myself vs. most black men my age-late 20s.

do you see that same trend? and if so, how do you combat the feeling of hopelessness that tends to result?

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 08:54 AM

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132. "well"
In response to Reply # 68


  

          

i've been told that given the fact that men mature more slowly than women, african women were traditionally advised to seek someone older than they, at least by 10 years sometimes (!)

i personally don't limit myself in terms of age in that way. i.e. the person does not have to be my age.

i also don't limit myself by group, so i don't exclude continental africans or diasporic africans from europe, the americas etc.


>i'm finding that the older i
>get, the more difficult it
>is to find brothas on
>my level. and i'm not
>that old, nor am i
>far along in my career
>(i don't even really have
>one yet...lol. but i'm doing
>well enough to support myself).
>
>
>i'm noticing a marked difference in
>myself vs. most black men
>my age-late 20s.
>
>do you see that same trend?
>and if so, how do
>you combat the feeling of
>hopelessness that tends to result?
>


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 06:03 AM

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157. "got u"
In response to Reply # 132


  

          


~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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Huggy Bear
Charter member
451 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:12 AM

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77. "Sounds as if"
In response to Reply # 47


  

          

your trying to please everyone else at the expense of your own happiness.

Thanks for watching. Goodnight !!

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 05:06 AM

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125. "if this is directed at me"
In response to Reply # 77


  

          

>your trying to please everyone else
>at the expense of your
>own happiness.

no this is not the case. my "happiness" is not at stake. practising what i preach is happiness to me. i will not find happiness outside of my race but i won't look for it there, nor do i need to. Lord knows there are plenty of Black folk, it's not like there are only 3 on this earth.


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 03:23 PM

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108. "RE: That almost happened to me once"
In response to Reply # 47


  

          

> i feel like
>everything i do is an
>example that i am setting.
>i feel like everything i
>do sends a message.

that's gotta suck, to be so important...

>i send the message
>that no member of my
>people was good enough.

to somebody who is looking hard for an insult, yes.

to somebody who is level-headed, it says no more than that somebody who wasn't a member of your people *was* good enough.

god forbid.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 05:03 AM

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124. "you're funny"
In response to Reply # 108


  

          

>> i feel like
>>everything i do is an
>>example that i am setting.
>>i feel like everything i
>>do sends a message.
>
>that's gotta suck, to be so
>important...

u r just as important. i am AWARE that i send the message, some ppl are not. some ppl are and don't care. the same goes for u, u set an example in everything u do, u send a message. that's all i am saying.

>>i send the message
>>that no member of my
>>people was good enough.
>
>to somebody who is looking hard
>for an insult, yes.

if u want to come to that conclusion about the person who receives that message, that's on u, the message is sent nonetheless.

>to somebody who is level-headed, it
>says no more than that
>somebody who wasn't a member
>of your people *was* good
>enough.

again u choose to define who think is "level-headed" and "who is looking hard for an insult"
the message is still being sent.


>god forbid.
>
>-k-
>
>White Women: Systematically contributing to the
>breakup of the
>black family by stealing black men
>from their black women like
>thieves in the night since
>1966.


u send a message to ppl who read this sig. u sent a diff. one when u said it was "just a joke."


>"bitch i hate you put this
>bikini on and shake your
>ass" -Vivrant

^ as well u send a message w/ this sig. u can come to conclusions about the ppl get the messages u send but u still sent them, whether or not u want to realize that is up to u.

Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 01:00 PM

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207. "RE: you're funny"
In response to Reply # 124


  

          

the only message that is authorized by me concerning my sig is "i find these things to be humorous".

i will not and cannot be responsible for the way that every single person perceives my actions. for one, i understand that anybody watching me from afar probably doesn't know me, and won't know me, enough for me to care. two, it would drive me crazy.

it's not a part of me to base major life decisions on what others will think. if it's a part of you, i'm not going to try to talk you out of it. but do i hope you choose your value meals verrry carefully.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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Ximo
Charter member
351 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 09:02 AM

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135. "RE: That almost happened to me once"
In response to Reply # 47


          

>i feel like
>everything i do is an
>example that i am setting.
>i feel like everything i
>do sends a message.
>so it is not enough
>for me to say i
>love my people but when
>it comes to the person
>i share my sacred space
>w/ i send the message
>that no member of my
>people was good enough.

doesn't that make you feel like a slave to your own people? i'm speaking for myself, not feeling attached or commited to any race, culture, countery or society. i am me. in the usa, race is really a big label all over your soul that tells you who you are. that would freak me out.. again, i'm speaking for myself

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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Monique
Charter member
2511 posts
Sun Feb-10-02 01:11 AM

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230. "RE: My ideals are changing"
In response to Reply # 11


  

          

My ideals remain the same as I choose nothing but a black man in my life as a partner.
Communicate with whites all the time.Many in my personal phone directory.

However,for the second time not too long ago I experienced how a beyond friendship bond could be establised between people of different races.

First it was communication with an Attorney and something that felt so natural.
He was also so up on me as in unnecessarily sitting close.
I left there receiving free counsel.My car paid in full due to that free counsel.It was weird,comfortable and similar interest.

Secondly in what I call my journalistic investigation I came upon someone who we share many common interest.
Our conversation was so fluid and as if out of near 50 people in close confines we were the only ones there.
I said after coming home,well dang,why have I not come across a black man with so much in common and such a comfortable feeling.
Later on I found we had even greater common grounds,family/homebodies.Nature lovers.Content with being home tending to Natures surroundings.

I have always beleived in people making their own choices.
On the issue of race I only feel anger when it is especially used against black women by black men that they choose "White Women" because they are sooo much better/and better looking.
A #1 BET message board discussion.Which make me want to create another topic.

***********************************************************
NELLY: I'm Humble In Life Taking Nothing For Granted

AFRICA: www.bbcnews.com

THE BROKER: John Grisham

  

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Cocaine_Soul

Sat Feb-02-02 01:57 PM

  
12. "doesnt matter..."
In response to Reply # 0


          

I look at this issue the same way I look at musical taste... if its good, then its good... if i female connects with me physically, spiritually and emotionally, I could care less what ethnicity she is...

-Cocaine Soul

**Ras Kass on the phone with a broad**

Ras: I got a question. What hang upside down, and got a little dick?

Keisha: I dunno

Ras: C'mon you know what it is. What hang upside down and got a little dick?

Keisha: what a bat?

Ras: Yea! Now what got a big dick and hang up?!!

Keisha: ummm... *CLICK*

  

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Cocaine_Soul

Sat Feb-02-02 01:58 PM

  
13. "*typo*"
In response to Reply # 12


          

> if i

*change to "if a"...





-Cocaine Soul

**Ras Kass on the phone with a broad**

Ras: I got a question. What hang upside down, and got a little dick?

Keisha: I dunno

Ras: C'mon you know what it is. What hang upside down and got a little dick?

Keisha: what a bat?

Ras: Yea! Now what got a big dick and hang up?!!

Keisha: ummm... *CLICK*

  

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rawlakid
Charter member
8323 posts
Sat Feb-02-02 02:20 PM

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15. "perfecty fine with me"
In response to Reply # 13


  

          

.



okplayer Ever on hip hop shows:

"Ever: Only at a fukin' backpacker show do you find beautiful girls who don't get hit on by the guys.

Alfred:I know, Lame ass backpackers prolly

  

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jahlove7
Charter member
10743 posts
Sat Feb-02-02 07:31 PM

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17. "to each his/her own"
In response to Reply # 15


  

          

but i've found that sistas are my cat's meow. i've dated just about every female race/ethnicity out there, and if anything, it gave me an even greater appreciation and respect for my black women than i previously had. (and my respect was high even then) there's a connection i have with a black woman that's unbreakable. it's total physical/mental/spiritual connection. we can relate to each other's love, life & pain without speaking about it. the feeling is almost cosmic. that's just my preference. because contrary to popular belief, the diversity of black women is astonishingly great and vast.

inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 01:08 PM

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208. "and contrary"
In response to Reply # 17


  

          

to the popular belief on this board, so is that of white women.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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jahlove7
Charter member
10743 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 04:37 PM

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213. "RE: and contrary"
In response to Reply # 208


  

          

>to the popular belief on this
>board, so is that of
>white women.
>
that's debatable.



inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 04:43 PM

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215. "if so,"
In response to Reply # 213


  

          

then your statement is too.

you know this.

cute comment, though.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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jahlove7
Charter member
10743 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 06:49 PM

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217. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 215


  

          

>then your statement is too.
>
>you know this.
>
>cute comment, though.
>
the statement was purposely debatable. considering that it's a given that white women are diversified. american society constantly tells us this. if you have a feenin' for brothas, that's on you. but you have no point to prove about white women on this post.

but of course, you know this.

way to hang in there though.



inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 08:14 AM

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221. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 217


  

          

if you have a feenin' for black, white, or purple women, it's on you.

i don't go after black men. i don't go after white men. i don't go after men, period. i go after a specific *person*, and that is where our viewpoints diverge.

throughout this *post*, which is what i'm referring to, not american what-have-you, the impression is given that white women are one homogenous group that are by definition incompatible or unworthy of pairing with anybody of a different race if you value culture or your people at all. so, as much right as you have the right to toot the horns of black women- and i do agree with what you said- i have the right to make the same statement about white women, latina women, or any kind of women. females in general are diverse and wonderful creatures. to negate the value of a woman because of what she looks like or who her parents were is ridiculous.

in the majority of this thread, we're not discussing things on a personal or human level. the issue is being treated as if everybody has, or has to have, an easily discernable sociopolitical agenda when choosing a mate. you may say that i'm just a liberal with a lust for black dick and that my partner is confused and a traitor to his community. you can proclaim that the value of my relationship is just my "feenin for a brotha". but you don't know us, and if you did, you'd know you sound like a fool. on the other hand, the aforementioned situation may be just true for another couple. point being, it's way too presumptuous for anybody to run around assessing interpersonal relationships based on a set of grossly oversimplified generalizations.

and nobody is arguing the point about choices. it's really not that profound. what is being argued is other's ability to determine things about you based on the choices you make. i have yet to hear a convincing arguement that doesn't involve "it's obvious that your values are x". yes, you have an incredible sixth-values-sense. and john mccain has gaydar.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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jahlove7
Charter member
10743 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 09:05 AM

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222. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 221


  

          

>if you have a feenin' for
>black, white, or purple women,
>it's on you.

i DO have a feenin' for black women. and you're right, that's on me. that's my CHOICE. that's who i feel comfortable with.
>
>i don't go after black men.
>i don't go after white
>men. i don't go after
>men, period. i go after
>a specific *person*, and that
>is where our viewpoints diverge.
>
our viewpoints diverge only in the fact that i choose sistas. within black women, there is a specific *person* also. there is a standard that i hold black women as well as myself to. which is why i mentioned the diversity of black women in the first place. is that shown by "american" society? i don't think so. and try as you might, you can't successfully argue that point.

>throughout this *post*, which is what
>i'm referring to, not american
>what-have-you, the impression is given
>that white women are one
>homogenous group that are by
>definition incompatible or unworthy of
>pairing with anybody of a
>different race if you value
>culture or your people at
>all. >that this was explicitly stated,
>so don't ask for examples.]
>so, as much right as
>you have the right to
>toot the horns of black
>women- and i do agree
>with what you said- i
>have the right to make
>the same statement about white
>women, latina women, or any
>kind of women. females in
>general are diverse and wonderful
>creatures. to negate the value
>of a woman because of
>what she looks like or
>who her parents were is
>ridiculous.
>
and who negated the value of white women on this *post*? i obviously didn't, as my first post clearly read "to each his/her own". and you certainly do have the right to preach about the diversity of white or women of other ethnic/racial groups. but you're beating a dead horse here. it's clear that white women are diverse. the american sociopolitical agenda clearly shows this both overtly and covertly. the diversity of white women is splashed everywhere around us, through television, movies, magazines, and music. women of color don't get that benefit. for a black, hispanic, latina, indian or asian woman to even be considered diverse, she's usually labeled with an "exotic" tag. meaning she's "different" from other women of color and although she's close to being considered white, she's not quite there. afterall, white women are the highest standard that ALL women of color must aspire to.

>in the majority of this thread,
>we're not discussing things on
>a personal or human level.
>the issue is being treated
>as if everybody has, or
>has to have, an easily
>discernable sociopolitical agenda when choosing
>a mate. you may say
>that i'm just a liberal
>with a lust for black
>dick and that my partner
>is confused and a traitor
>to his community. you can
>proclaim that the value of
>my relationship is just my
>"feenin for a brotha". but
>you don't know us, and
>if you did, you'd know
>you sound like a fool.
>on the other hand, the
>aforementioned situation may be just
>true for another couple. point
>being, it's way too presumptuous
>for anybody to run around
>assessing interpersonal relationships based on
>a set of grossly oversimplified
>generalizations.

first off, you're getting really personal and you're telling on yourself in the process. personally, i could give a damn about your personal relationship. so throw out the "you'd be foolish" bullshit you're on. like i said, if you diggin' a brotha, that's both your and his CHOICE. and you're both entitled to it; to each his/her own. the bottom line is that you made a choice to be with your mate, and he made a choice to be with you. regardless of both your human or hidden agendas. deal with it and get on with your lives.
>
>and nobody is arguing the point
>about choices. it's really not
>that profound. what is being
>argued is other's ability to
>determine things about you based
>on the choices you make.
>i have yet to hear
>a convincing arguement that doesn't
>involve "it's obvious that your
>values are x". yes, you
>have an incredible sixth-values-sense. and
>john mccain has gaydar.
>
you're obviously arguing the point about choices. are you implying that you happened to slip and fall on your man's dick? nope. you made a CHOICE get with him, regardless of what your values are. let's be real here. you simply could have turned him away but you didn't. you didn't choose a fat guy. you didn't choose a crackhead. and you didn't choose a terminal cancer patient. you ultimately chose who you wanted to be with and no matter how cleverly you attempt to use the bob-and-weave strategy, you gotta live with that choice and both the praise and criticisms that comes with it. just like the rest of us.
>




inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

Printer-friendly copy | Top

                                        
hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 12:41 PM

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225. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 222


  

          

>i DO have a feenin' for black women.

right, right, we've been over this.

> within black women

key phrase.

>which is why i mentioned
>the diversity of black women
>in the first place. is
>that shown by "american" society?

i'm not arguing that point. i made an assumption (oops) about the intelligence/observance levels of our okayplayer peers. i figured that telling most here that black women are diverse is like telling us that potatoes are for eating.

>my first post clearly read
>"to each his/her own".

i appreciate that.

>and you certainly do have ...
>diverse. the american sociopolitical ...
>women of color don't ...
>women of color must aspire to.

agreed. but like i said before, i view most in the activist forum as at least a little more informed than the masses; i.e. most here recognize the diversity of black women. operating under that assumption, you mentioned it because you felt that somebody needed to hear it. and likewise, in the scope of this discussion, i feel that my message needs to be heard- and considered- by some.

>first off, you're getting really personal
>and you're telling on yourself
>in the process. personally,
>i could give a damn
>about your personal relationship.
>so throw out the "you'd
>be foolish" bullshit you're on.

first off, i'm getting really hypothetical from an outside/opposing point of view, including yours, and the only thing i'm telling is that i want nothing to do with the off-the-cuff, misguided write-offs of my relationship handed out so freely by some. if you didn't want to get into my relationship, you shouldn't have brought up my personal business in the first place. by reducing my feelings and/or relationship to jungle fever, you're telling on yourself.

>you diggin' a brotha, that's
>both your and his CHOICE.

about that dead horse you mentioned earlier...

>deal with it and get
>on with your lives.

*g* you know, on your brilliant advice, i think we just might move past this discussion and, you know, go to work, bathe, maybe even eat.

>are you implying that you happened to slip
>and fall on your man's dick?

again, intentionally or not, reducing my relationship. in the name of respect and decency, please watch that.

>you simply could have turned him away
>but you didn't.

you're right. i could have looked at my best friend, put my arm up to his, and told him that sorry, he was unfit to be the potential father of my children. this irish skin must be protected. but i didn't.

>you didn't choose a fat guy.

didn't i?

>you ultimately chose who you
>wanted to be with

right, right, right, choice, choice, choice. but do you think that you always choose who you love? as if feelings don't come into play until you've sized the other person up and given them the seal of approval?

>no matter how cleverly you
>attempt to use the bob-and-weave
>strategy, you gotta live with
>that choice and both the
>praise and criticisms that comes
>with it. just like
>the rest of us.

you treat it like it's a liability... *hehe* my relationship is not herpes. give me some credit. i'm not ten years old; i'm familiar with consequences. however, living with both the praise and the criticisms does not mean that i have to be mute. living with it, to me, means that i'm free to discuss.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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jahlove7
Charter member
10743 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 01:47 PM

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227. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 225


  

          

>>i DO have a feenin' for black women.
>
>right, right, we've been over this.
>
then why did you mention it in your last post? aw, are you mad that i prefer sistas? i apologize. i guess you feel i'm being insensitive to irish women. *lol*

>
>>which is why i mentioned
>>the diversity of black women
>>in the first place. is
>>that shown by "american" society?
>
>i'm not arguing that point. i
>made an assumption (oops) about
>the intelligence/observance levels of our
>okayplayer peers. i figured that
>telling most here that black
>women are diverse is like
>telling us that potatoes are
>for eating.

not really. while you're not arguing the point, you're definately assuming. first off, you seem to lack the understanding that black women are considered the whores of american society and that perception is put forth FIRST AND FOREMOST. even by some of the so-called okay player activist. so you might want to do some refiguring. and maybe read a few more books.
>
>>my first post clearly read
>>"to each his/her own".
>
>i appreciate that.
>
>>and you certainly do have ...
>>diverse. the american sociopolitical ...
>>women of color don't ...
>>women of color must aspire to.
>
>agreed. but like i said before,
>i view most in the
>activist forum as at least
>a little more informed than
>the masses; i.e. most here
>recognize the diversity of black
>women. operating under that assumption,
>you mentioned it because you
>felt that somebody needed to
>hear it. and likewise, in
>the scope of this discussion,
>i feel that my message
>needs to be heard- and
>considered- by some.

your assumptions are getting more off-base by the minute. i mentioned that black women are diverse because i was expressing my love for them and one of the reasons why i have that love. nothing more. you're reading too much into this. if anything, get off your pedastal and just take what i said at face value.
>
>>first off, you're getting really personal
>>and you're telling on yourself
>>in the process. personally,
>>i could give a damn
>>about your personal relationship.
>>so throw out the "you'd
>>be foolish" bullshit you're on.
>
>first off, i'm getting really hypothetical
>from an outside/opposing point of
>view, including yours, and the
>only thing i'm telling is
>that i want nothing to
>do with the off-the-cuff, misguided
>write-offs of my relationship handed
>out so freely by some.
>if you didn't want to
>get into my relationship, you
>shouldn't have brought up my
>personal business in the first
>place. by reducing my feelings
>and/or relationship to jungle fever,
>you're telling on yourself.

firstly, i didn't bring your relationship up. YOU DID. and did i make an off-the-cuff, misguided assumption? nope. it seems that you did AND you admitted it. and if you do suffer from a case of jungle fever, then once again, that's on you. you put yourself in a bottle. i just put the cap on.
>
>>you diggin' a brotha, that's
>>both your and his CHOICE.
>
>about that dead horse you mentioned
>earlier...
>
i sure do. you've been beating that secretariat corpse since that making your sign on this post. okay, we get it. white women are diverse...blah, blah, blah...all we need now is a helen redy (sp) song.

>>deal with it and get
>>on with your lives.
>
>*g* you know, on your brilliant
>advice, i think we just
>might move past this discussion
>and, you know, go to
>work, bathe, maybe even eat.
>
taking another black history course woudn't hurt either.

>>are you implying that you happened to slip
>>and fall on your man's dick?
>
>again, intentionally or not, reducing my
>relationship. in the name of
>respect and decency, please watch
>that.
>
right. and intentional or not, watch your assumptions. in the name of decency and respect or course.

>>you simply could have turned him away
>>but you didn't.
>
>you're right. i could have looked
>at my best friend, put
>my arm up to his,
>and told him that sorry,
>he was unfit to be
>the potential father of my
>children. this irish skin must
>be protected. but i didn't.
>
your irish skin protects you whether you're willing to admit it or not, the same way my african skin makes me a target whether i want to confess it or not. don't get it twisted. you still made a choice and that's the bottom friggin' line.

>>you didn't choose a fat guy.
>
>didn't i?

i see you intentionally left out the crackhead and terminal cancer patient. good try, but you get the point.
>
>>you ultimately chose who you
>>wanted to be with
>
>right, right, right, choice, choice, choice.
>but do you think that
>you always choose who you
>love? as if feelings don't
>come into play until you've
>sized the other person up
>and given them the seal
>of approval?
>
yes. YOU DO ULTIMATELY CHOOSE who you want to be with. and like it or not, you do give the seal of approval. it's just that simple.

>>no matter how cleverly you
>>attempt to use the bob-and-weave
>>strategy, you gotta live with
>>that choice and both the
>>praise and criticisms that comes
>>with it. just like
>>the rest of us.
>
>you treat it like it's a
>liability... *hehe* my relationship is
>not herpes. give me some
>credit. i'm not ten years
>old; i'm familiar with consequences.
>however, living with both the
>praise and the criticisms does
>not mean that i have
>to be mute. living with
>it, to me, means that
>i'm free to discuss.
>
you know, i can't believe how this discussion started. in addition, i can't believe that i'm sitting here at the all-star game giving this a reply. it must be a slow moment here, which it is. first off, all i did was express my preference for sistas and that contrary to popular belief, black women are diverse. i didn't knock white women in the process. but here you come along putting yourself and all other white women on a pedastal. why? God only knows. because i also said i've previously dated women of various races. i've made my point. (over and over again) do you have a point? if so, please get it out so we can both go on with our lives.



inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

Printer-friendly copy | Top

                                                
hyde
Charter member
24819 posts
Sat Feb-09-02 07:21 PM

Click to send private message to this authorClick to view this author's profileClick to add this author to your buddy list
228. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 227


  

          

>i guess you
>feel i'm being insensitive to
>irish women. *lol*

you got it. i'm crushed.

>first off, you
>seem to lack the understanding
>that black women are considered
>the whores of american society
>and that perception is put
>forth FIRST AND FOREMOST.

i'm not in the dark about that, which is what i tried to make clear. in your opinion, i gave too much credit to okp activists in assuming that most of them also understand this. i'll accept that as a possibility.

>so you might want to do
>some refiguring. and maybe
>read a few more books.

you're taking the points i make in this forum and putting them in a different context. because i look at the statements of many activists and see them as being aware, and operate with that as a given, you assume i'm completely ignorant of the situation. refiguring my perception of activist to include those okp's who don't get it, okay. read more books- i do that on my own, and i don't need your prompt. about that pedastal...

>your assumptions are getting more off-base
>by the minute. i
>mentioned that black women are
>diverse because i was expressing
>my love for them and
>one of the reasons why
>i have that love.
>nothing more. you're reading
>too much into this.

one, my assumptions are no more off base than you telling me that in verbalizing _your_ insinuations, i'm telling on myself/putting myself in a bottle/etc. make no mistake about that.

two, fine. you said it for no reason, and nobody needed to hear what you had to say. i guess we are both equally guilty of reading too much into what the other has to say. still, my comment was made because i felt that it needed to be said, whether you thought i had a point to make or not.

>firstly, i didn't bring your relationship
>up. YOU DID.
>and did i make an
>off-the-cuff, misguided assumption? nope.
> it seems that you
>did AND you admitted it.

i didn't say relationship, i said personal business, i.e., once again my "feenin for brothas". i didn't say you made the assumption, i said some do. read.

>taking another black history course woudn't
>hurt either.

taking another black history course isn't going to change my opinion that all women are equally beautiful, if that's what you're referring to.

>your irish skin protects you whether
>you're willing to admit it
>or not, the same way
>my african skin makes me
>a target whether i want
>to confess it or not.
> don't get it twisted.

i freely admit it, and you just confessed it. i'm also willing to bet that neither of us are comfortable with that. nothing's twisted. it seems to me that you think my head is in the clouds.

>i see you intentionally left out
>the crackhead and terminal cancer
>patient. good try, but
>you get the point.

i'm not *with* a crackhead or a terminal cancer patient. nitpicky, but yes, i get your point.

>yes. YOU DO ULTIMATELY CHOOSE
>who you want to be
>with. and like it
>or not, you do give
>the seal of approval.
>it's just that simple.

that wasn't my question, though. i ask out of curiosity, because who you're with and who you love aren't always one and the same. and yes, i know that you can choose to be or not to be with someone, whether you love them or not.

>i didn't knock white women
>in the process. but
>here you come along putting
>yourself and all other white
>women on a pedastal. why?

i take no offense at your stated preferences. i have no reason to. the point at which this started was when you said that white women's diversity is debatable. where do i put white women on a pedastal? where do i say that white women are more x or y than anybody else? my whole point was that nobody should forget the value of any woman. what i said wasn't even in response to you or anything you said- your post just provided the inspiration for a point that i felt needed to be made in response to the thread as a whole.

>i've made my
>point. (over and over again)

i noticed that part. =P

>so we can
>both go on with our lives.

honey, i really hope this isn't interfering with anything major in your life. right now i'm having fun, and trying to understand your viewpoint while communicating mine. hopefully, you're doing the same. this doesn't have to involve negativity or personal attacks, even though we're both pushing buttons.

that was fluffy and gross... but true.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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jahlove7
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Sat Feb-09-02 09:13 PM

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229. "RE: if so,"
In response to Reply # 228


  

          

>>i guess you
>>feel i'm being insensitive to
>>irish women. *lol*
>
>you got it. i'm crushed.

you'll get over it.
>
>i'm not in the dark about
>that, which is what i
>tried to make clear. in
>your opinion, i gave too
>much credit to okp activists
>in assuming that most of
>them also understand this. i'll
>accept that as a possibility.
>
you are in the clouds if you believe that all okp activist are enlightened. that's not a possibility but a fact. the okp activist board is about discussion of activist subjects moreso than enlightenment. everyone brings their own baggage and hangups to the table and let them out here in case you haven't noticed.
>
>you're taking the points i make
>in this forum and putting
>them in a different context.
>because i look at the
>statements of many activists and
>see them as being aware,
>and operate with that as
>a given, you assume i'm
>completely ignorant of the situation.
>refiguring my perception of activist
>to include those okp's who
>don't get it, okay. read
>more books- i do that
>on my own, and i
>don't need your prompt. about
>that pedastal...
>
unlike yourself, i haven't assumed anything. and i don't think you're ignorant of the situation as much as you simply lack overall understanding. and from all that you've written, that much is pretty obvious.
>
>one, my assumptions are no more
>off base than you telling
>me that in verbalizing _your_
>insinuations, i'm telling on myself/putting
>myself in a bottle/etc. make
>no mistake about that.
>
point taken.

>two, fine. you said it for
>no reason, and nobody needed
>to hear what you had
>to say. i guess we
>are both equally guilty of
>reading too much into what
>the other has to say.
>still, my comment was made
>because i felt that it
>needed to be said, whether
>you thought i had a
>point to make or not.
>
everyone needed to hear it considering how black women are both portrayed and treated by society. i just said i was expressing myself more than trying to make a point. you're still assuming i see...
>
>i didn't say relationship, i said
>personal business, i.e., once again
>my "feenin for brothas". i
>didn't say you made the
>assumption, i said some do.
>read.

point taken.
>
>taking another black history course isn't
>going to change my opinion
>that all women are equally
>beautiful, if that's what you're
>referring to.
>
we both agree that all women are beautiful. i said that without actually writing it in my first post.
>
>i freely admit it, and you
>just confessed it. i'm also
>willing to bet that neither
>of us are comfortable with
>that. nothing's twisted. it seems
>to me that you think
>my head is in the
>clouds.
>
whether i confessed or not is irrelevant. both are obvious facts. i'm willing to bet that you're more comfortable in your position than i am. and remember that dead horse? you're beating the skin off of it with the "i'm-ignorant-head-in-the-clouds stance you're taking.

>>i see you intentionally left out
>>the crackhead and terminal cancer
>>patient. good try, but
>>you get the point.
>
>i'm not *with* a crackhead or
>a terminal cancer patient. nitpicky,
>but yes, i get your
>point.
>
once again, you're choice, right?
>
>that wasn't my question, though. i
>ask out of curiosity, because
>who you're with and who
>you love aren't always one
>and the same. and yes,
>i know that you can
>choose to be or not
>to be with someone, whether
>you love them or not.
>
to answer your question: people don't always get with the person they're in love with. or the person you fall for might come out of left field. but the fact remains; you decide to get with that person you fall for, regardless of whether you seem them coming or not. the ultimate choice is yours to make. point blank. whether you like it or not. you choose. if you want to be with a black man, you'll choose a black man. if you want an irishman, you choose him also.
>
>i take no offense at your
>stated preferences. i have no
>reason to. the point at
>which this started was when
>you said that white women's
>diversity is debatable. where do
>i put white women on
>a pedastal? where do i
>say that white women are
>more x or y than
>anybody else? my whole point
>was that nobody should forget
>the value of any woman.
>what i said wasn't even
>in response to you or
>anything you said- your post
>just provided the inspiration for
>a point that i felt
>needed to be made in
>response to the thread as
>a whole.
>
no, this actually started when you replied to my original post. you could've put your two cents in anywhere else on this post. but you chose mine and you tried to make your point when it's a given that white women are constantly shown in a diversified setting. since okp activist are so "enlightened" we would know this, right? so your point was basically moot. and you didn't need to say that white women are the dominant female human species. your rebuttal to my post spoke volumes.
>
>honey, i really hope this isn't
>interfering with anything major in
>your life. right now i'm
>having fun, and trying to
>understand your viewpoint while communicating
>mine. hopefully, you're doing the
>same. this doesn't have to
>involve negativity or personal attacks,
>even though we're both pushing
>buttons.
>
sweetheart, this isn't interfering at all. if it was, i wouldn't give this post the time of day. it's fun for me also. especially considering that you've been caught with your hand in the proverbial cookie jar about five or so times. my viewpoint hasn't changed a bit. if you're having problems understanding it, then maybe your head is in the clouds. i understand where you're coming from. but i also understand that you could've made your point elsewhere, and left me alone to express my love and preference for black women. i think i have that right without interruptions. don't you? and i'm not really pushing any buttons. if i was, you'd know it.





inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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hyde
Charter member
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Fri Feb-08-02 04:44 PM

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216. "or how about"
In response to Reply # 213


  

          

"c'mon man. you ain't being realistic."

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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jenNjuice
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3527 posts
Sat Feb-02-02 07:43 PM

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19. "RE: *typo*"
In response to Reply # 13


          

more drugs?

"The only thing we wanted for our country was the right to a decent existence, to dignity without hypocrisy , to independence without restrictions... The day will come when history will have its say."-Lumumba

  

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Cocaine_Soul

Sun Feb-03-02 06:01 PM

  
44. "RE: *typo*"
In response to Reply # 19


          

naw... your mom was givin me head and it was a little distracting...

-Cocaine Soul

**Ras Kass on the phone with a broad**

Ras: I got a question. What hang upside down, and got a little dick?

Keisha: I dunno

Ras: C'mon you know what it is. What hang upside down and got a little dick?

Keisha: what a bat?

Ras: Yea! Now what got a big dick and hang up?!!

Keisha: ummm... *CLICK*

  

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yuckwheat
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1367 posts
Sun Feb-03-02 07:00 AM

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23. "it's suicide."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

every culture/race concerned with group solidarity and long term survival promotes the union of its own members with one another AND discourages unions with outsiders, especially a culture/race at the brink like africans in the americas...

it is totally unacceptable.

if any member of my family or one of my close friends got with an outsider, i would cease contact with them.

  

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Ximo
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Sun Feb-03-02 10:13 AM

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29. "huh?"
In response to Reply # 23


          

did i get you correctly? sticking together to conserve a race sounds all good, except that it reminds me of the nazi ideology.. something like that would only weaken the race's health eventually!

it's just like with dogs - if you want a strong healthy dog you don't go for the pure raced ones, you go for the mixed ones! it's the same with all animals, including homo sapiens - the offspring of two different races have stronger immune system. but i'm not sure if it's like that with "afro-americans" who doesn't have the same immune system as their african forefathers (same thing with latin americans).

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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Ximo
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Sun Feb-03-02 10:37 AM

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32. "correction"
In response to Reply # 29


          

like bluetiger said, there aren't a thing like human races (see post #7), so wherever i said "race" i meant "culture"

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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yuckwheat
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Sun Feb-03-02 10:39 AM

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33. "RE: huh?"
In response to Reply # 29


  

          

africans in the diaspora and in africa, have a greater amount genetic diversity within themselves then ALL non-africans groups have between themselves.

non-african groups are bottleneck populations. ie: they descended from a small founder population that left africa and have been "inbreeding" ever since, thus less genetic diversity.

  

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Ximo
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Sun Feb-03-02 11:59 AM

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37. "RE: huh?"
In response to Reply # 33


          

thanks for sharing that, do you have anything to back it up? and why discourage unions with outsiders? why is that so bad for the society/culture?

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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yuckwheat
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Sun Feb-03-02 12:26 PM

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39. "RE: huh?"
In response to Reply # 37


  

          

source: http://exn.ca/Stories/1997/04/01/03.asp - an article on the report by Dr. Jorde published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science.

"The scientists measured the genetic diversity among three racial groups - 65 Asians, 72 Africans and 120 Europeans - by counting the number of mutations or changes found in their mitochondrial DNA. Jorde found the greatest diversity among Africans, a strong indication that they are the ‘oldest' population."

it isn't "bad", it just isnt "optimal" for a group to promote unions with outsiders, those engaged in such "mixed" relationships and the children of "mixed" backgrounds tend to have divided loyalties, and a confused outlook in terms of their "place"/role within either community even IF they are embraced by one or both sides, they tend to lack a solid and innate understanding of either group.

it just isnt positively affirming for the culture if its members are forming their most meaningful relationships (husband/wife) with outsiders, the end result is the death of a culture, as it gets swallowed up and assimilated by others.




  

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nahymsa
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Mon Feb-04-02 08:14 AM

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60. "REPEAT THIS!"
In response to Reply # 39


          

it just isnt positively affirming for the culture if its members are forming their most meaningful relationships (husband/wife) with outsiders, the end result is the death of a culture, as it gets swallowed up and assimilated by others.



  

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13Rose
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Sun Feb-03-02 09:33 AM

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26. "RE: DA TRUTH"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

I used to have a problem with black and white people being together intimately and having a family. I now look at it differently. I was once involved with a white woman who we were friends and were intimate on occasion and when she wanted to take it further I said no because of the fact that she was white and I couldn't rock with that. I then found that it was wrong of me to go inside her if I felt that way. We clicked on a lot of levels and are still close and I just think for me now love is love and if I fall in love with a white woman than that is what it is. It will be hard though because I always think about how I have been conditioned to like lighter women and white women being the height of that I would always feel guilty. Seeing all people as people I am open for love anywhere just with the white situation I am sensitive because of the conditioning however I think there can and has been genuine love from time to time. Hell with all the criticism in the world about that for a person to enter that type of relationship and be happy they have to be in love.

Todays post was paid for by the following.

"It's a shame how we went from God to Niggas"
Cant remember the MC's name but good quote just the same.

"you wanna be a big fish you lil yuppie...black man can't be no yuppie/ you put on your suit and tie with your big clothes...you don't associate with the Negros"
Ice Cube / Be true to da game

This post was paid for by the following.

www.twitter.com/13Rose
www.debunkthemyth.org
http://dashaunworld.wordpress.com/
www.mothergreen.com

Remember MJ The Great!
PSN: ThirteenRose

  

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bigblakafrika
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Sun Feb-03-02 09:54 AM

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28. "how am i gonna perpetuate the pale face?"
In response to Reply # 0


          

it's all about the wisdoms.

ya mean? y'm sayin?

« prepostblak »

  

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reality
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Sun Feb-03-02 11:40 AM

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35. "RE: The choice is yours"
In response to Reply # 28


          

As far as i am concerned i have really grown i remember at one time when i was 18 or so i said i could never even be friends with a white person.I use to think back then all white people were evil and i really hated whites for a period of time.But as i have gotten older people are people and i prefer dating black women but i am open to anything as long as i love the person and we are vibing.I have friends of all kind one of my best friends is a Italian kid and me and him we argue about differet things but i still consider him family and will have his back no matter what.So as i have gotten older i see things different alot of my friends over the years have notice that i have mellowed out.I am about the people and if they are cool i don't give a damn what race you are if you are cool you are cool.I am still pro-black but i am also pro-human.So would i date outside of my race like i said i am open to anything i a not hung up on color no more.

  

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bigblakafrika
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Sun Feb-03-02 11:49 AM

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36. "why in the devil..."
In response to Reply # 35


          

would you wanna get in the devil?

ya mean? y'm sayin?

« prepostblak »

  

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QUEENET

Sun Feb-03-02 12:24 PM

  
38. "THA ORIGINAL"
In response to Reply # 36


          

I LONG TO HAVE THE CONVERSATION WITH MY OWN PEOLE IT SEEMS AS IF I AM TALKING TO SOMEONE OUTSIDE OF MY RACE WE JUST DON'T CLICK IT SEEMS LIKE WE HAVE NOTHING IN COMMON, OR IS IT JUST THAT IM NOT OPENINING UP FOR THERE TO BE AND CONVERSATION. I'VE NEVER DATED A WHITE MAN ONLY BROTHA'S AND I FEEL THAT THEY KNOW ME AND MY PAST WE CAN RELATE MENTALLY. BUT TO DATE A WHITE MAN I ALWAYS LOOK AT THAT AS BEING FORBIDEN. BUT THE WHITE MAN AND BLACKS ARE NOT THE ONLY RACE OUT THERE I HAVE A VERY GOOD FRIEND WHO IS FROM INDIA AND WE BOND SO WELL ,AM I RACIST TOWARDS WHITES.

  

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reality
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Sun Feb-03-02 02:04 PM

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42. "RE: THA ORIGINAL"
In response to Reply # 38


          

True indeed i hear what you are saying everybody is so focus on black and white that it seems like no other race does not count i feel ya.

  

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hyde
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24819 posts
Fri Feb-08-02 01:13 PM

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209. "i don't date"
In response to Reply # 38


  

          

people who type in all caps.

-k-

White Women: Systematically contributing to the breakup of the
black family by stealing black men from their black women like thieves in the night since 1966.

"I don't blame you for being wack, I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you." (c)Copywrite

"bitch i hate you put this bikini on and shake your ass" -Vivrant

-k-
q.e.p.d.

una y otra vez

  

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reality
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Sun Feb-03-02 02:03 PM

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41. "RE: why in the devil..."
In response to Reply # 36


          

First off the devil is a state of mind.It is good to be pro-black and i know what our people have been thru and continue to go thru as we speak.But you can't indict every white person and say they are devils there are some black people who you can call devils as well.To me that is the plan to keep the people divided and not come together.oh yeah by the way check the philosophy of the Original Black Panther Party and Malcolm X yes pro-black groups but also willing to work with other races.

  

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bigblakafrika
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Sun Feb-03-02 02:17 PM

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43. "bpp and malcolm got soft..."
In response to Reply # 41


          

white just ain't right.

ya mean? y'm sayin?

« prepostblak »

  

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reality
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Sun Feb-03-02 06:24 PM

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45. "RE: bpp and malcolm got soft..."
In response to Reply # 43


          

Man that is a ignorant statement.How did they get soft
these brothers and some sisters put their lives on the line every day.Let me tell you something they did more then your so-called black leaders are doing now.what about the Israelites and New black panthers they are fake and that is why they are no threat to the system because they talk a good game and rheotoric all day.So don't come with that soft shit statement because these people like Malcolm,King and the black panthers like i said put their lives on the line everyday and they were soft by no means.

  

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bigblakafrika
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Sun Feb-03-02 06:41 PM

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46. "new jack blaks is soft too..."
In response to Reply # 45


          

a lot of toms.

you ask me huey, el hajj malik, and martin should've took some crackas out with them. eff being a martyr.

any one who will get you killed is your enemy.

ya mean? y'm sayin?

« prepostblak »

  

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jahlove7
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Sun Feb-03-02 08:49 PM

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49. "RE: bpp and malcolm got soft..."
In response to Reply # 45


  

          

as malcolm used to say: "let's cool it brothers." sure, the post-n.o.i. malcolm was willing to work with anyone. but he specifically said that whites could support and not join his organization. he understood that the moment whites joined his organization, the black people would subconsciously start deferring to them. king also adopted the same ideology from '66 until his death. i can't say they got soft. i can say they got intelligent. both malcolm and martin gave their lives and you don't do that being soft.

inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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bigblakafrika
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Sun Feb-03-02 09:08 PM

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50. "martyrdom ain't help nobody."
In response to Reply # 49


          

malcolm only looked out the window with his piece. his paranoid ass knew he was going out, he shoud've took some muhfukkkas wit'im.

ya mean? y'm sayin?

« prepostblak »

  

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jahlove7
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Fri Feb-08-02 04:41 PM

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214. "RE: martyrdom ain't help nobody."
In response to Reply # 50


  

          

>malcolm only looked out the window
>with his piece. his paranoid
>ass knew he was going
>out, he shoud've took some
>muhfukkkas wit'im.

since malcolm DIDN'T KNOW exactly what white cat was trying to kill, who should he have taken out? some innocent person? c'mon man. you ain't being realistic. and if somebody was trying to kill you in third and fourth person, wouldn't your ass be paranoid? don't knock it until you've been in malcolm's shoes, which ain't never gonna happen.





inaugural member - okayplayer sports hall of fame.


what i'm digging right now:

chocolate butterfly - self-titled
laura jane - welcome to my planet boo
me & this japanese guy - waiting for the miracle
wade3 - dreams
tracey amos - who are we really?

  

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reality
Charter member
3835 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 07:51 AM

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58. "RE: bpp and malcolm got soft..."
In response to Reply # 49


          

I hear ya Jah i agree with what you are saying and you are right about Malcolm.

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Sun Feb-03-02 09:13 PM

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52. " Can people......"
In response to Reply # 0


          

......just date whomever they want to date and stop making a federal case out of it?

Damn.

I'm sick of this issue, folk keep turning it into some meta-physical dicussion as if who they date/marry/fuck is going to cause some sort of cosmic ripples throughout the universe and save the world.....

If you want to be with someone, but with them......and stop blowing it out of porportion......damn......



Peace,





M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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N1
Charter member
262 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:34 AM

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64. "!!!!"
In response to Reply # 52


  

          

I feel you M1!

Most of you people on here are so out of wack its sick. Race?! Ethnicity?! Black,White,Latino? Please get a grip and look at the big picture! My race and background come in far second in my life, my Religion dictates my directions and understanding of things ... and racism, being with people who only look like me are not in those beliefs. But most of yall's GOD/Religion is Okayplayer/Music/entertainment/foolishness...

Peace

N1

"Love Me or Leave Me Alone"

"Dreams are for those who
sleep" - Bread

  

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bluesky
Charter member
58 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 03:49 AM

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121. "RE: Can people......"
In response to Reply # 52


          

GO RIGHT AHEAD AND DO WHATEVER YOU WANT...but when shit gets funky don't wonder why....because shit will get funky on ya!

  

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Liquescent

Wed Feb-06-02 01:43 AM

  
151. "RE: Can people......"
In response to Reply # 52


          

One word : E x a c t l y .




____________________________________
"I caught this insight on the way and quickly seized the rather poor words that were closest to hand to pin it down lest it fly away again. And now it has died of these arid words and shakes and flaps in them - and I hardly know any more when I look at it how I could ever have felt so happy when I caught this bird." - Nietzsche

  

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skaboy718

Sun Feb-03-02 10:40 PM

  
53. "RE: DA TRUTH"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I was gonna repond to a couple of other posts, but decided it would be best to stick with the original.
While what any of us thinks about the subject is irrelevant, I'll try to give my opinion.
"DA TRUTH" is there is no answer. The answer is as diverse as African genes. I've found this to work for me.

The person I date/fuck/marry will be someone who can deal with ME, period. And ME is a twenty-five year old man. It doesn't matter matters what ethnic group I belong to. If it does matter, then piss off, cause who wants to know you anyway.

I have my family, and they have never led me wrong. I brought home a Black girl who was a bitch, they told me she was a bitch. I brought home a white girl who was a bitch and they called her a bitch, too. When I finally got around to bringing home the right girl, they said, "Congrats. You're lucky to have her." They were right. I've been with her for seven years. She has no problems accepting that there are certain things were different for me growing up, and I tell her why. She never asks, "Why do Black people...?" and I don't ask her, "Why do Puerto Ricans...?" We instead ask, "Why do YOU...?"

Works for me.
Sorry about being so long-winded.

  

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guerilla_love
Charter member
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Mon Feb-04-02 02:53 AM

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54. "been thinkin"
In response to Reply # 0


          

about this for a few years now

i married someone of a different race and culture

a lot of our differences go deeeeep. in a way when u marry u share yr experiences- what happens to one happens to the other- and in a way there are experiences that cd never be shared

with everybody u meet there'll be differences. and u'll have to work those differences out for a long term relationship. so u gotta make the decision of what differences u wanna be reckoning with on the long term

as for the one true love out there somewhere/ soulmate/ how cd u help the color argument, i think it's bullshit. u do choose who is an ok person to fall in love with/ u choose who yr open to.

the main thing abt mixed relationships that makes my hair stand on end is the fetishizing some couples do over eachother- and when one or both people get "comfortable" and assume that having a mixed relationship means that they don't have any racist attitudes/beliefs/friction/tension/opressor/opressed/etc.

nothing makes u safe from that dynamic. not even sex.


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu

"Anyone who believes this nonsense is not intelligent enough to post on OkayActivist." k_orr

DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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praverbs
Charter member
27156 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 03:01 AM

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55. "RE: been thinkin"
In response to Reply # 54


  

          

>the main thing abt mixed relationships
>that makes my hair stand
>on end is the fetishizing
>some couples do over eachother-
>and when one or both
>people get "comfortable" and assume
>that having a mixed relationship
>means that they don't have
>any racist attitudes/beliefs/friction/tension/opressor/opressed/etc.
>
>nothing makes u safe from that
>dynamic. not even sex.

interesting.

*****¡ANNOUNCEMENTS!*****

-inbox me if you're an okayleftie. HottLykeFiyah, Kemet Ibutho, Edoggy, seventy7, ChuckFoPrez, Slap, and Jaymz did, so you should too.

-february 9th, 1982 is the blackest day in black history because it is poe ra verbs' nappy born day.

*****¡I AM! ¿ARE YOU?*****

d'accordjoueur.

"real niggas study conventional wisdom; real niggas shun conventional wisdom."-#'s 3 and 2 (respectively) of bonz malone's '10 real nigga rules for life' list.

"in this journey you're the journal, i'm the journalist...now you know, you don't have to ask."
-rakim. "follow the leader."

okayp'raverbs. GIVING YOU TRUE TRUTH SINCE '82 TIL INFINITY.

« Slick Rick the Ruler in the Land of the Blind »

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:50 AM

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71. "damn good point"
In response to Reply # 54


  

          

>when one or both
>people get "comfortable" and assume
>that having a mixed relationship
>means that they don't have
>any racist attitudes/beliefs/friction/tension/opressor/opressed/etc.
>
>nothing makes u safe from that
>dynamic. not even sex.


and very, very true.



_________________________________________________________
"Two centuries ago, a former European colony decided to catch up with Europe. It succeeded so well that the United States of America became a monster, in which the sickness, and the inhumanity of Europe have grown to appalling dimensions." ~~Frantz Fanon

"In the twenty-first century, Christianity, Islam and Judaism are still dominated by unenlightened males of every race in the East and in the West. Until women are truly heard in the church, the mosque, and the synagogue, the feminine expression of the Divine Attributes of the Creator cannot be experienced, and war will ultimately destroy most of humanity." ~~Min. Ava Muhammad

need a hero? http://www.gettosake.com

wanna say hi? AIM: LadyDay78

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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Ape Redwood
Charter member
6088 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:10 AM

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59. "This again?"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

Im going back to sleep....


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*snort* *snort*

You guys are STILL talking about this!?!?!

Going back to sleep again...

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---------
AIM: alpexNYC
DUJEOUS?
dumb okayactivist quote of the month:
"you only believe what you can find
proof on, and that is problematic in
the exchange of ideas."-holdmedown


¢

---------------------
Thursday, June 17th
Dujeous @ Bowery Ballroom
6 Delancey Street (at Bowery)
w/Addison Groove Project &
Gutbucket
10PM~$13
DUJEOUS debut LP "CITY
LIMITS" INSTOSNOW.
Buy my shit.

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:51 AM

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72. "yeah well u know"
In response to Reply # 59


  

          

lots of new folks comin in

don't know a dead horse when they see it

*shrug*

~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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guerilla_love
Charter member
8273 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:02 AM

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73. "i donno"
In response to Reply # 72


          

i have a different answer every time for this particular issue

kinda helps me solidify my thoughts some


==**peace**==

"the skilled binder uses no strings or knots, while to unloose what he has bound would be impossible." Lao Tzu


DomePoem Poets; redefining the third dimension of spoken word

.....

"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere"
- Amiri Baraka

http://www.okayplayer.com/guidelines

BUY MY BOOK- only $6! Inbox me for details

  

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LexM
Charter member
28342 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:03 AM

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85. "that's why i'm here"
In response to Reply # 73


  

          

but i can also understand ape wanting to take a nap


~~~~
http://omidele.blogspot.com/
http://rahareiki.tumblr.com/
http://seatofbliss.blogspot.com/

  

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k_orr
Charter member
80197 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:04 AM

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74. "Read #62"
In response to Reply # 72


  

          


one
k. orr

http://breddanansi.tumblr.com/

  

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The3rdOne
Charter member
9049 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:30 AM

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63. "IF..."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

...you believe in intelligent extra terrestial beings that have knowledge of us, humans, then they are Laffing thier fucking asses off, but at the same time, they cant figure us out. TRUST ME!


Jay-Z: Give it up for Jaguar!!!!

Jaguar: Nah, baby! It's you!

Shorty C: Damn, How about giving it up for the Roots!

  

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N1
Charter member
262 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 08:37 AM

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66. "!!!!"
In response to Reply # 63


  

          

Most of you people on here are so out of wack its sick. Race?! Ethnicity?! Black,White,Latino? Please get a grip and look at the big picture! My race and background come in far second in my life, my Religion dictates my directions and understanding of things ... and racism, being with people who only look like me are not in those beliefs. But most of yall's GOD/Religion is Okayplayer/Music/entertainment/foolishness...

Peace
N1

"Love Me or Leave Me Alone"

"Dreams are for those who
sleep" - Bread

  

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The3rdOne
Charter member
9049 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:05 AM

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76. "RE: !!!!"
In response to Reply # 66


  

          

Dawg...were u directing this at me?!?!? if so, get a grip. Religion shouldnt direct anybody in anything in life...Spirituality should. As far as race and relationships go, i meant to say that us as diverse people are very unique as a species itself. we are the only beings under God's eyes that goes thru this shit (as far as we know) If you didnt direct that comment to me, then i apologize for wasting you time. Peace, but justice first!

Jay-Z: Give it up for Jaguar!!!!

Jaguar: Nah, baby! It's you!

Shorty C: How about giving it up for the Roots!

  

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N1
Charter member
262 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 07:36 AM

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163. "RE: !!!!"
In response to Reply # 76


  

          

Naw,

I didn't even have time to read most of the posts before mine. If we follow religion the way GOD meant for us to follow it, then we would be rightly guided and be on a high spirtual level...making are choices from there. I don't even want to go there, to each his own.
Peace and Love

N1

"Love Me or Leave Me Alone"

"Dreams are for those who
sleep" - Bread

  

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justafanaticthought
Charter member
25 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 09:16 AM

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78. "RE: DA TRUTH"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

>I WANT TO KNOW HOW DO
>SOME OF YOU THINK ABOUT
>PEOPLE DATING OUT OF THERE
>RACE

Good post. My comment is only an opinion so........I guess its a preference. Who do you want to be invoved with. And it really should'nt matter but it does to some people. I prefer ( am attracted to ) a certain type of guy. Oh well..... I cant really help that. Alot of guys judge me based on what race they "BELIEVE" that I am. I "LOOK" like I'm latino, but I'm mixed. My mother is filipino, white and native. My dad is, black, white and native. Therefore they judge me without gettin ta know me first. I am mainly attracted to black men. I used to only like american black men, but as I've gotten older, I've found carribean and afrikans to be attractive. Now that I've grown more, all kinds of men are lookin good to me, but I'm still partial to "afrikan-american" guys. Preferably, dark skinned, tall, on the hip-hop or rasta tip......kinda big and oh yeh if they play the drums..............oh shit!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~SIG~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

justa fantastic fanatic frantic f$#&ing thought!

~justa fanatic frantic fantastic f@#$&ing thought!~

  

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Touchthese
Charter member
186 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:01 AM

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84. "ICE-T made it very clear ..."
In response to Reply # 78


          

I don't care whather you're blue or green or whether you're from Mars !

If you have a pussy: WE ! WILL ! FUCK ! YOU!


Same goes for me ! And besides ...Blue made it very very clear (see my signatures) ! By the way ... bluetiger ... can you specify what you mean with infertile ? like ...mules and mules can't reproduce ????



________________Signature begins yonder:

Journalist: How do you feel now as a muslim -sharing the same religion with a person such as UBL- after what we have come to witness ?

ALI (the real one) : How do you feel as a christian having the same religion as Hitler ?


Me -reading the paper-: damn... now that's sumtin ...

_____________touchthese_________________

http://www.allesreal.de/msnd/sounds/moisturise_your_mind.ram
________________________________________

Bluetiger: "Race = sub-species."
Sub-species generally produce infertile offspring as in the case of a mule. Humans procreate with each other & produce fertile offspring. There is only one race of humans. Maybe you should put forth your idea based on ethnicity or culture because race doesn't scientifically exist.

Me: Thank You Blue ! Thank you!
Lots o yall americans are
sickening me with all that racial
bullsh!t ... get over it !

It's Homo Sapiens Sapiens ! Basta ! thats all there is !no race shit ! dammit!

"Watch me kill em Jill-Scotilly"
:: www.menoosha.net ::

  

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marmari
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19686 posts
Mon Feb-04-02 10:47 AM

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91. "i'll say it like this"
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

i'm bi. that means i am interested in women. i have dated a woman before. she was white. that compounded the issue in the eyes of people who are extremely conservative, as i found myself being asked to explain "why a white girl?" i LIKED HER. she LIKED ME. we dated. that was it. we broke up because of a man. not because of color. basically, what i'm saying is that it matters not what your melanin content is. if you're an ass, you're an ass; the same applies to being a good person. i don't give a damn who you date as long as you're in a happy, healthy relationship.

****************************************
i found god in myself and i loved her, i loved her fiercely-- ntozake shange

she is the one you call sister, you blaze like lightning about the room, flicker around her like fire, dazzle yourself in her wide eyes, listing her unfelt needs, thrusting the tenets of your life into her hands-- adrienne rich

got AIM? marmari

http://members.blackplanet.com/marmari/#

: : : : : : : : : : : :
c if i give a fck if u like me | u know i don't

  

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Osun

Mon Feb-04-02 02:17 PM

  
102. "RE: i'll say it like this,read this shit and respond"
In response to Reply # 91


          

THE FOUNDATION FOR THE STUDY OF HIPHOP CONSCIOUSNESS.

WHAT SCARES Y'ALL ABOUT SUCH A FOUNDATION? MAKE ALL YOUR WORDS FLESH, WITH GETTING DOWN WITH WHAT IS BEST FOR HIPHOP CULTURE AND THE FUTURE OF SOCIETY AND MANKIND. WORD IS BOND.

TOPICS ON INTER-RACIAL RELATIONSHIPS? C'MON! GET WITH WHAT IS YOURS!

THE ONLY THING TO FEAR IS:WHITE WORLD DOMINATION. THE STIFELING OF HIPHOP CULTURE AND OKAYPLAYERS AND OTHERS CHOSING NOT TO TEACH AND PRESERVE THEIR CULTURE.

WHAT?
urbanscientits@hotmail.com

  

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QUEENET

Mon Feb-04-02 02:17 PM

  
103. "OKAY"
In response to Reply # 91


          

I JUST WANTED TO SEE THE VIEW OF HOW THE WORLD LOOKS AT THIS,AS A ISSUE OR AS NONSENSE. I GUESS I HAVE A LOT TO THINK ABOUT. THE WHOLE PURPOSE WAS FOR MYSELF AND MAYBE FOR OTHERS I HAVE PROBLEMS(IT SEEMS) WITH EXCEPTING OTHERS. I GUESS I'M STUCK IN THE PAST, BUT I NEED A REALITY CHECK 4-REAL. I SEE SOME PEOLPE HAD MY POINT OF VIEW AND OTHERS HAD A MORE OPEN POINT OF VIEW. AS I SAID BEFORE I HAVE BEEN CLOSING OUT OTHERS OUTSIDE OF MY AFRICAN RACE BECAUSE I'M SCARED, I SEE THAT NOW. I NEED TO LEARN TO OPEN UP.SHIT I NEED TO GROW UP AND STOP MAKING THIS SUCH A ISSUE. I DON'T WANT TO SAY I'M RACIST I DON'T PUSH OTHERS AWAY JUST BECAUSE BUT I'M SCARED TO SEE THE TRUTH OF US ALL BECOMIN ONE 4-SHO. YA #1
CRYSTYLE

  

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Ximo
Charter member
351 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 01:04 PM

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144. "yea"
In response to Reply # 103


          

i learned some things too.. it's definitively an issue, i mean look at the number of replies and all other topics like this in the archive! and as far as i'm concerned, we all brothers and sisters..

<sig>
"Today’s real borders are not between nations, but between powerful
and powerless, free and fettered, privileged and humiliated" -
"I went to school for 14 years and my best teacher was experience" -
-
</sig>

I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 09:55 AM

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167. "Question"
In response to Reply # 103


  

          

any relation to KOONTZILLA?

just askin'


Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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Ximo
Charter member
351 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 01:03 PM

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180. "lol"
In response to Reply # 167


          


I REMEMBER HIM! -BKyle
A nice OKP memory...

  

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Calico
Charter member
24604 posts
Tue Feb-05-02 08:28 AM

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131. "i don't have a problem.."
In response to Reply # 0


  

          

..with that...i don't like it though when people only date inside their race because of stereotypin, and fear of what others would think...i also don't like it when people hat on interaccial dating like it's destroying the planet...get over that man...so, whether red, white, black, yellow, or other...if i like/love her, i'mma be with her...

"da da dee, da dee da, da da dee da dee da"- from 'i'm blue'

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 06:33 AM

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159. "WHAT IS THE BEEF?!!"
In response to Reply # 0


          

I don't get this...

Some people say "race" doesn't matter, date who you "connect" with, "race" as we know doesn't have to be a factor in those connections.

I say those who date, marry, breed with people outside of their "race" don't value "race" as a criteria for those interactions.

Where's the contradiction? IF you saying race is not a factor then clearly race is not something you hold up as important in your choosing a mate. Why get upset when I say exactly what you yourself have said? Take responsibility for your choices & what they mean.

Or is it that you don't like the fact that some people draw a negative conclusion about you from your choices. Well that's life, now ain't it.

  

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jsmooth995
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2752 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 07:27 AM

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162. "The beef is"
In response to Reply # 159


  

          

The beef is you are making broad blanket assumptions based on extremely simplistic generalizations, which will always be bankrupt when applied to such a complex animal as the human being.

The beef is that you are mistaken to think you can use the ethnicity of someone's mate to judge whether they love themselves, wether they love being Black, and so on.

You don't have to be a Black nationalist to love being Black. Love comes in many different forms, and there are many different ways you can express it and reinforce it. If you think you can make judgements about someone's character simply because their love is expressed in different ways than yours, you are wrong. That is the beef.

Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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k_orr
Charter member
80197 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 07:51 AM

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164. "Message 92"
In response to Reply # 162


  

          

"When you choose your mate, you decided that her being black was NOT a priority."

That's all she is saying. That's all she has been saying. Everything she has said, has been in support and explanation of the above.

And folks are feeling guilty about that.

Could it be that my mate's race/culture/ethnicity is not a priority for me?

The real question is should it be.

And the resounding answer from this section of Okayactivist lurkers is...No.

They go back to a very tired, It's all about love, it's all about the person argument. I don't think that's being honest at all. You choose who you interact with, who you let get close to you. You choose by the places you choose to work, relax, worship, shop et cetera.

If for some reason you do not find an African American/Afrikan/Latino/Boricua..et cetera, it's not because they don't exist, it's because you aren't trying to find them. They most certainly do exist.

And that concept is really what is not sitting well with her opponents.

Call it the path of least resistance, it is a path that statistically most Black women choose. And that path is only reinforced by our male centered society, where the man gets to do the choosing.

one
k. orr

http://breddanansi.tumblr.com/

  

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jsmooth995
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2752 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 09:44 AM

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166. "Are you kidding?"
In response to Reply # 164


  

          

>"When you choose your mate, you
>decided that her being black
>was NOT a priority."
>
>That's all she is saying.
>That's all she has been
>saying. Everything she has
>said, has been in support
>and explanation of the above.

Have you read this entire thread?? Because that is most certainly NOT all she's been saying.

This premise cited above I would have no major beef with. But she has gone far beyond that.

When she says things like: "if you value your blackness, your heritage & your culture why wouldn't you choose to be with someone who brings those same qualities to the table?"...

When she suggests that being open to dating outside your race and being susceptible to abusive relationships are caused by similar psychological issues...

And when she says things like: "it just isn't positively affirming for the culture if its members are forming their most meaningful relationships (husband/wife) with outsiders, the end result is the death of a culture, as it gets swallowed up and assimilated by others"...

...when she says these things she is going way beyond what you quoted.

I am not questioning the premise you cited. It is the next step, the blanket assumptions and value judgements made based on that premise, that are being questioned.

>And folks are feeling guilty about
>that.

No, it is Nahymsa who is asserting that they should feel guilty, and they are questioning this assertion, as well they should.


Jay Smooth
WBAI 99.5 FM in NY
http://www.hiphopmusic.com

Trying is the first step towards failure. - Homer S.

http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 12:33 PM

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174. "RE: Are you kidding?"
In response to Reply # 166


  

          

>>"When you choose your mate, you
>>decided that her being black
>>was NOT a priority."
>>
>>That's all she is saying.
>>That's all she has been
>>saying. Everything she has
>>said, has been in support
>>and explanation of the above.
>
>Have you read this entire thread??
>Because that is most certainly
>NOT all she's been saying.
>
>
>This premise cited above I would
>have no major beef with.
>But she has gone far
>beyond that.
>
>When she says things like: "if
>you value your blackness, your
>heritage & your culture why
> wouldn't you choose to
>be with someone who brings
>those same qualities to the
>table?"...

the question she asks is y wouldn't u? and your answer is ... what? i mean u would say i do value my blackness and my heritage and i choose NOT to be w/ someone who brings those same qualities b/c __(insert answer here)___

>When she suggests that being open
>to dating outside your race
>and being susceptible to abusive
>relationships are caused by similar
>psychological issues...

could u quote that, i remember where she talked about abuse, but i didn't come to that conclusion.

>And when she says things like:
>"it just isn't positively affirming
>for the culture if its
>members are forming their most
>meaningful relationships (husband/wife) with outsiders,
>the end result is the
>death of a culture, as
>it gets swallowed up and
>assimilated by others"...

to be fair she didn't say that.

>...when she says these things she
>is going way beyond what
>you quoted.
>
>I am not questioning the premise
>you cited. It is the
>next step, the blanket assumptions
>and value judgements made based
>on that premise, that are
>being questioned.
>
>>And folks are feeling guilty about
>>that.
>
>No, it is Nahymsa who is
>asserting that they should feel
>guilty, and they are questioning
>this assertion, as well they
>should.



Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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M2
Charter member
10072 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 03:57 PM

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191. "RE: Message 92"
In response to Reply # 164


          

>"When you choose your mate, you
>decided that her being black
>was NOT a priority."
>
>That's all she is saying.
>That's all she has been
>saying. Everything she has
>said, has been in support
>and explanation of the above.

When she stops at the "her being Black was not a priority" I don't so much have a problem with that, some people will go with who someone they connect with...rather then just being with a Black person. It's when she takes it to people not valuing Black Families, Black people, hurting the community, deciding not to have Black babies, it's when she discounts people valuing connections or just being with someone because they are Black....or that it's bullshit that someone believes they connected with a white person and choose to be with them over this proverbial BLack person they connected with and rejected.......that the argument falls to pieces.

She doesn't know these people and there circumstances can't make these judgements...she can only say that they value their feelings for this non-white person over just being with someone who is Black....and even that's a general assumption that's not always true.

People's actions and choices are not always defined by their priorities and values, options and what is best for you can override priorities.

I value Human life, but if you attack me and I'm forced to kill you, can you say that I don't value Human life or that I had no choice?

The woman I'm intersted in the most right now is Black, now if we get serious in the next few months...can it be said that I made it a priority to be with a Black Woman or a woman I connected with, thereby making my choice racially independent?

You can't make an absolute statement that if you're with a Black Woman it's because being with one is a priority for you, if it's not true.

In my case it won't be.....even if I date Black women for the rest of my life.


>And folks are feeling guilty about
>that.

Within the context of your argument about values, a person can't feel guilty about something they don't supposedly make a priority of or value.

A better statement is that YOU would feel guilty.

People are arguing, because they don't appreciate someone they don't know telling them their thoughts, feelings, motivations and values.....when THEY are the ones who are the experts on those things.....people get especially irked when they tell people how they feel and the person says:

"No, you don't feel that"


>Could it be that my mate's
>race/culture/ethnicity is not a priority
>for me?
>
>The real question is should it
>be.
>
>And the resounding answer from this
>section of Okayactivist lurkers is...No.
>
>
>They go back to a very
>tired, It's all about love,
>it's all about the person
>argument. I don't think
>that's being honest at all.
> You choose who you
>interact with, who you let
>get close to you.
>You choose by the places
>you choose to work, relax,
>worship, shop et cetera.

It's obviously not that simple, if people simply choose who they get with, there wouldn't be any single people looking for a Black, Asian, Latino, Catholic, West Indian, Jewish, Irish, Italian mate, they would just go out and choose and be done with it.

If the "It's all about the person/connection" argument was false and it's truly all about the demographic group, why would there be people who complain about not being able to find any good: Black, Asian, Catholic, Jewish, Italian, et, etc Men/Women? and/or people of those groups that they connect with?

Let's be real, who dates people they don't connect with simply because of their race.

Do you?

>If for some reason you do
>not find an African American/Afrikan/Latino/Boricua..et
>cetera, it's not because they
>don't exist, it's because you
>aren't trying to find them.
> They most certainly do
>exist.
>
>And that concept is really what
>is not sitting well with
>her opponents.

Actually, that's a false concept.

The fact that there are numerically enough Black women for every Black man, doesn't prove in the slightest that all of these people are going to connect and fall in love with each other.

Consider the following:

Black people have a propensity towards homodiversity...yes we're a diverse group of people...but Blacks (particularly young ones) tend to gravitate towards a particular definition/way of being Black E.g A particular "niche" of Blackness. There is social pressure on those who don't fit into a particular niche or the niche of those around them.....

....which reduces the number factor because you have groups of people trying to act similar.

People typically date the same person (In different iterations) over and over and over again, when the circumstances and various subtle differences are right...they make a serious committment to that person. In other words, relationships are hard, just because someone connects with you doesn't mean it will work out.....so it becomes a numbers game...which supports the idea that people are more likely to make a "successful connection" if they expand their dating pool.

See above on people having difficulty finding someone Black....if it was truly as simply as there being someone for everyone, there would be far fewer single Black people.

Consider the Demographic of Blacks who are predominantly the ones dating outside their race: Middle & Upper Middle Class Blacks....now consider the class issues prevalent in Black America, also consider the # of Young Blacks who fit into that economic demographic but try to pretend as if they don't.

Wouldn't those factors reduce the dating pool for people fitting into the middle & upper-middle class category?

I mean damn, it's not like I can just roll down into West Philly and just "Holla".

Remember our conversation about Babies and people believing early pregnancies/having a couple kids by ones mid 20s was normal and "just life"?

You know my opinion on the subject, how could I ever really connect with a single mother that has a couple of kids and/or a woman who thinks it's life and she just lucky since she doesn't have kids.

Hell, you've been reading my posts since what? late 99' early 00'?

What % of Blacks do you think are in synch enough with my way of thinking to even attempt a connection, let alone connect with me successfully?

Just an example.....

....it's not as simple as numbers.



Peace,













M2

The Blog: http://www.analyticalwealth.com/

An assassin’s life is never easy. Still, it beats being an assassin’s target.

Enjoy your money, but live below your means, lest you become a 70-yr old Wal-Mart Greeter.

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 10:03 AM

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168. "Examples Please"
In response to Reply # 162


  

          

>The beef is you are making
>broad blanket assumptions based on
>extremely simplistic generalizations, which will
>always be bankrupt when applied
>to such a complex animal
>as the human being.

of what u said above. Examples where she did this. then explain y u think these will "be bankrupt when applied
to such a complex animal as the human being. "

that is, what less complex animals can these blanket statements that u r going to give e.g.s of be applied to.



>The beef is that you are
>mistaken to think you can
>use the ethnicity of someone's
>mate to judge whether they
>love themselves, wether they love
>being Black, and so on.

examples where she stated the above.


>You don't have to be a
>Black nationalist to love being
>Black.

where she said this.

Love comes in many
>different forms, and there are
>many different ways you can
>express it and reinforce it.


where she said this was not the case and how the ACT of marrying a white person SHOWS ur love of black ppl.

>If you think you can
>make judgements about someone's character
>simply because their love is
>expressed in different ways than
>yours, you are wrong. That
>is the beef.


examples of where she attacked anyone's character.


Thank you.

Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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jsmooth995
Charter member
2752 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 10:13 AM

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169. "see #166 for examples n/m"
In response to Reply # 168


  

          


http://www.illdoctrine.com - where hip-hop vlogs?

  

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kemetian
Charter member
1336 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 12:36 PM

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175. "RE: see #166 for examples n/m"
In response to Reply # 169


  

          

also i'm missing the proof of bankruptcy and the e.g.s applied to amoeba
Shemhotep
************
"If u want a butterfly u got to B a
butterfly" - India.Arie, Butterfly

"the wages of sin is death"
Romans ch.6 v.23

"If the essence of 'love'... is giving
selflessly or sacrificing for others,
how can it then be equated with
something that you can 'fall into or
out of'?" - Ra Un Nefer Amen,
Afrocentric Guide to a Spiritual Union

Kemetian
--------------------------------------
check it out:
www.natureworksforyou.co
m

"Pour libation for your father
and mother who rest in the
valley of the dead. God will
witness your action and
accept it. Do not forget to
do this

  

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nahymsa
Charter member
1734 posts
Wed Feb-06-02 12:01 PM

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170. "My response"
In response to Reply # 162


          

>you are making broad blanket assumptions based on
>extremely simplistic generalizations

I assume that if a man WANTS to marry a black woman he can because there are plenty to choose from.

Explain how that's bankrupt?

>The beef is that you are mistaken to think you can use the >ethnicity of someone's mate to judge whether they love themselves, wether they love being Black, and so on.

Prove that this is a mistake. I believe that if you want something you go & get it IF its available. If you don't then perhaps you didn't really want it. If the issue is about availability then let me know.

>You don't have to be a Black nationalist to love being
>Black.

Since I'm not a black nationalist or claimed to be, I can't really call it.

>If you think you can make judgements about someone's character
>simply because their love is expressed in different ways than
>yours, you are wrong.

The judgement I make is about what is being valued. You're the one worried about how these values reflect on your character. Me thinks you protest too much.

Plain & simple, if you want a black woman, they're all over the place, outnumbering black men in many cases, as diverse & distinct as blades of grass or snowflakes.. GO FIND ONE. If you can't, but can locate a connection with the much smaller subset of nonblack women who aren't racist, understand you, your culture, etc. then maybe you should ask yourself why that is.

  

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jsmooth995