In the past wk my eyes have slowly been opened to the number of women that I know who've been in a physically abusive relationship. Previously in relation to domestic violence the mantra was "I WISH that nigga WOULD put his hands on me"...but outside of that braggadocia and super women syndrome we women have with one another do we really have a problem? I'm just trying to frame some sort of discussion, no finger pointing, no woe is me isms, no "poor u" stuff, just serious, semi-anonymous discussion of ur frame of reference and experience with domestic violence.

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

serious question btw

￭￭￭￭

.

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

i was 5

i think this is why i am so combative with men to this day

as for physical or emotional abuse i dont have expereince in that

but im willing to discuss it

i sometimes wonder about the nah never...

cause so many things i said that wont be me, it was me

and i think damn if and when my husband decides to beat my ass if i will just curl up and take it...

i have no idea and that's scary

_______________________________________
U make me feel like cookies, yo. (c)DeePhunk

but i sense it may be a powerless feeling. yesterday at work a customer had a black eye and didnt look happy. i hoped it wasnt a guy that did that to her

just taking it.

she black

""look at how many posts you have, do you work here or something?""
©Erykah Badu

my mom's 1st husband abused her and it really contributes to the woman I am today. She came out stronger and thus made a stronger child.

Now my sis...i don't understand. She's out of the physical abuse but not she's moved on to mental and emotional abuse. A lot of women feel pressured to be married or in relationship. Somehow a lot of women can't see that relationships with friends can be just as fufilling. She's going to trail over some BS that he got her mixed up in. When are we going to stop depending on men for our happiness? When will women stop believing in fairytales? Physical, emotional, mental, it's all abuse.

There really isn't anything you can say to make person leave an abusive relationship. The strongest stance I could take was not attending the wedding or buying them a present because I didn't agree with her choice. I wish could do more.

In a rebellious streak decided to move out of our house after graduating high school. I guess all the things we grew up hearing not to do, she decided she wated to try out.

Picked a guy that was the opposite of all my dad had said men were to be like....My sister is 6ft, loud, and knows how to speak her own mind.....and being with this guy changed her.

He use to beat her ass...constantly...she got pregnant and he beat the shit out her when he found out.

I never understood why she stayed or knowing her, why she didn't beat his ass....or call my dad, my brothers, my uncle...etc.

Years later...probably the only real conversation we ever had...I asked her why she would just let a man beat on her and not leave. She said that in her search for happiness or knowing what was best for her that was who she picked.....later on when the shit hit the fan she felt like she had made the poorest choices in her life, was ashamed, and later on felt like she had gotten in the situation that she deserved.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's like water...ebbs and flows....why fight against the current when it can take you so far? (c)wise, on the psychological aspects of good sex.

Folks need to 1) grow up, 2) stop playing games they have no skills in and 3)keep it moving as adults. (c) Improv

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You posting in a hoe's tone (c) monkeynuts

-Improv!?
OKP Vet and one of the Elite

******SIG*******
"Also let me mention/ my only intention/ is to feed you every single thing you hunger for/ In my heart I have to/ and want to have you/ so fulfilled that you will never need to ask for more..."
Dwele, "Hold On"

"She had the ill lil poke out/ made me wanna choke out/ my chicken/ cuz my wallet is on slim pickings"---Boho Lou

**Watch This Space**

RIP Simmon and Kapuni...

_________________________
Man up

“Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist”---George Carlin

A friend is in an abusive relationship, and she just takes the physical and emotional abuse because that's all she's seen. Her mother and grandmother were both in abusive relationships.

When asked why she stays with him she answered, "I don't see any other niggas lined up knocking down my door trying to be with me."

Her mother knows that he treats her badly, but just tells her to pray about it. Her mom just wants her to have a man.

u cannot stop any one person frum hittin u

i don't know, bons...i think we have come to expect aggression in our relationships {we in terms of afro americans, our in terms of afro americans}...i think it stems frum slavery on the large part & well, domestic violence is pretty much across the board

i'm sure "he BET not even THINK it" has morphed into "i hope he doesn't try"




care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


_______________________________




¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

>i'm sure "he BET not even THINK it" has morphed into "i hope
>he doesn't try"
>

I see that happening now and more frequently in the near future. The number of aggressive, violent lyrics and sentiment towards women especially black women in main stream culture is definitely more open than it's ever been in my lifetime. It's like what do we do? And how much of this existed before that wasn't spoken about?

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

u can't control another's behaviour, not even in all ur i-wear-three-capes-&-got-on-badass-shoes'dness

no one can command or foresee another's acts against them...i mean, yeah the walkin quackin duck thing...but it's like never say never...u can't say for certainty u can just hope...& i don't mean for that to sound helpless at all, u just can't call what another does/may do


care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


_______________________________




¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

I guess I need to see if some study has been done with black women in mind...I'm just wondering how common it is, if reported, if there r even any statistics

as an aside, a group round here was giving out info on how to report, where to report, where to flee, who to call in lipstick tubes...genius

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

i just got a visual in my mind of a mother sendin her child to school w/a note pinned on his chest "my mommy's being abused, please help"



care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


_______________________________




¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

but I likes

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

norman rockwellesque
& like upon closer inspection u can read what the note is sayin
givin insight into there is no perfect {nuclear} family



care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


_______________________________




¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

!!!
copyright that idea
lol
fire.

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

that's what folks do around here!!!


care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


_______________________________




¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

I've only experienced being pushed against a locker but that was after smacking the crap out of someone...

I learned that my mother had a boyfriend who abused her which would explain alot of her neurosis about me and my sisters and men. I just never even imagined it. Coworkers and friends somehow in the last wk or so have had stories about it happening to them and I really just had no idea. Again, all I hear(d) was "I wish he would......"

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

violence when you're not even hit

emotional abuse, i think, is something black women are far more prone to put up with without realizing it initially

than physical abuse.

i have no statistics to prove that, just personal discussions i've had with friends...usually takes them years to realize that their feelings have been manipulated, that they have been getting the vibe that they're ugly wenches, etc...without being aware of the effect it was having on them.

or if it's even known how to quantify it as such

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

women who have been in an abusive relationship. A few women in my family and friends has been through this. I think that it has made me the woman that I am today. Not to say that it will never happen to me, but one thing I do know is that it isn't what I want for myself. I once was in a situation where a guy I was dating (just dating) wanted to "play" wrestle with me...but it was something about it that made me leary...I kicked his azz out. I was just thinking to myself, if he play like that...what other kind of shyt do he got up his sleeve. I try to be observant to the little clues...like a muthaphucka snappin' off for no reason...CLUE! After seeing my cousin get beat down, literaly...it just made my anger rise. The same muthaphucka that can talk shyt to you, can't talk shyt to their man. Something is wrong with that picture. I don't know if you all recall me saying that I was taking care of my cousin's child and my own at the age of 21,working and going to school....well this is why. And the shyt really made me go ballistic. Why in the hell am I taking care of your kid while you sit around doing nothing and waiting on the fool that is kicking you azz to get out of jail and then come back and kick your azz. Out of concern for the kids I did it. She could have had help on several occasions, but it was just a wasted effort.

I think all come from not feeling loved, not feeling important and not having anything concrete to live for, even though I don't see how anything can be more concrete than your kids. Well after years of talking and convincing, she finally moved. But in no way do I think this is the end of the story. I already told my brothers if I'm EVER in that situation...come and beat the hell out of the nigg@ that is such a punk that he get kicks out of hitting women. Make sure you do a good enough job so I don't go back. It's just one of those situations that you don't know how to handle until you are in it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IN ROTATION

Jeanius
Dillagence

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I grew up with it until I was about 8. The physical has stopped but the verbal continues. And I stand by my statement that if you speak to me the wrong way and/or put your hands on me it's over. I don't tolerate it from my pops (anymore) so I'm not going to tolerate it from others. I'm more afraid that I'll be abusive to my sig other versus being abused.


I used to get high on life, but I developed a tolerance. J-Sun

...she had a body like a cello with legs
i mean the ass was absurd
long neck
smooth skin
pretty face
cookie nipples
eyes wide as her hips
full lips between dimples

I'm
>more afraid that I'll be abusive to my sig other versus
>being abused.

still a problem, u know?

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

but it comes more from paranoia than my actions. ya know, "the abused become abusers." so i make an effort to not piss on people. i know who i am and what my boundaries are so i put those boundaries in place (and on myself) for the folks i deal with. so pretty much i won't do anything to them i wouldn't want them doing to me.

I used to get high on life, but I developed a tolerance. J-Sun

...she had a body like a cello with legs
i mean the ass was absurd
long neck
smooth skin
pretty face
cookie nipples
eyes wide as her hips
full lips between dimples

I just found out about my mom but now alot of my behavoir and her ((seemingly)) paranoia make alot of sense
I feel everything u said though

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

life sucks sometimes....


..my pops was a verbal abuser, he used to scare my mom by tearin shit up...but...she never said he hit her.. (prolly cuz she knows i wouldn't forgive or forget that)

...this guy i know came to the club, and beat the snot outta his girlfriend in mens bathroom...i'm a bouncer so i heard him yelling through a window outside, but i thought he was yellin at his brother....blood was everywhere, and since she didn't press charges, the police could do nothing...i had alotta unresolved anger that night....the most fucked up part is everybody washed over the incident, and it all started cuz her friend was talking shit to him...he still comes to the club...

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

at a club...it was terrible...My 21st birthday...

Dude literally, dragged her azz outta the club by her ponytail. I wanted to help her fight this fool, but all she kept saying is just stay out of it. The police is a couple of yards away. She says don't get the police. My birthday is on Christmas...we outside in below zero weather...no coats, and she taking it...everybody is watching. This shyt made me mad. (by the time I got home, I couldn't talk and I was sick for two weeks) I know dude couldn't have whipped the both of us. But I know how women are when it come to their man, I really don't regret avoiding it, cause you know they got back together. The really phucked up part is that dude tried to apologize to me for ruining my birthday...he said that we were in the club acting slutty. So I proceeded to tell his azz to go phuck his self, because I ain't none of his women and I don't have to accept an apology from a punk azz bytch and I can act any gotdamn way I want too...although his observation was incorrect. After I snapped on his azz real good they broke up. And my friend swears up and down it was my fault. I told her I don't have to be nice to his azz...and if he stupid enough to dump you after I told his azz off, he didn't want you noway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IN ROTATION

Jeanius
Dillagence

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

..your friend needs to grow the fuck up...accepting a bad situation and practically doin nothin in hopes it'll just get better...sucks...i know that night i was really pissed, and hadn't been that frustrated in a loooooong time...

"yes, sometimes my rhymes are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hos should know i'm tryin to correct it"- hiphopopotamus

.

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

for ABUSER.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IN ROTATION

Jeanius
Dillagence

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

about my sister..... and her husband.... like if dude put his hands on her... it would be on question on how fast i would kick his ass.


Thing is beating on a woman is never accpetable in tight knit families.... shyt don't happen in my fam

Sincerly,
Chauncy J. Phoulington III
Dark Sith Lord of Hate

that's the whole pt

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

but i doubt that.... cause we had ONE issue like that.... and lets just say dude was not very healthy after we found out.



The women in out fam would say something

Sincerly,
Chauncy J. Phoulington III
Dark Sith Lord of Hate

>The women in out fam would say something

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

that's what i think it boils down to. If that is not instilled in these females at all,if that is not a personality trait that harbors inside of them.. Then getting thier ass kicked doesnt seem that bad,cuz well he must love me if he beats me. I know WAY to many females that get they asses kicked on the regular. I have uncles that have no issue with beating the shit outta they wife/girlfriends.. and i asked myself what all these women have in common.. they had no clue of their self worth. perod.. they didnt think they could get better, so the settle for what they got. I have NEVER been in an abusive relationship, not even close to one, but then again i also have a very stong understand of me and what im worth, and have had that attitude for as long as i remember.. Females need a lesson on learning self worth. Like fo real..

Writing words that come to mind
Writing words that clears the mind
Writing poems that frees the mind
I write cus if not
I'd lose my mind
*me

*trinigurl*

"The word "conspiracy" is now shorthand for unspeakable truth" -Gore Vidal

the black woman in america has become a brain dead walking pussy. nothing more nothing less.

uhm

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

U STUPID!

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

I know a lot of other black women (including my mom) who have been beaten by their husbands/boyfriends.

I don't know if the guys I dated just weren't the girl-beating type, or if they knew they'd get fucked up by one of my many male homies if they put their hands on me, but fortunately it never came to that in any of my relationships.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I don't owe yo ass no explanation
for how I choose to live my life.

I was 17/18/19 and so was he. We'd been friends since Jr High. I'd always been that "wish a nigga would" type girl, and by the third time he'd banged me up, I was ready to put a hit out on his ass. I couldn't figure out how I had the "good sense" to want to take action, but not the good sense, nor the strength to leave. The last straw was when he tried to put my head thru the passenger side window...I was out.

Looking back on it, friends ask how I could've forgiven him. I just answer "I know he was in a really bad place, a very angry place at that time, and he never (to this day) has been very good at channeling anger" We still talk often, I visited him last month, I'm never afraid or angry or resentful. I've learned from the experience, and he's become a better person.

peace

-----------------------------
"Since it is art that translates civilization from one generation to the next, "art" is a quality-of-life need that cannot be disputed."

> I just answer "I know he was in a really bad place, a very
>angry place at that time, and he never (to this day) has
>been very good at channeling anger"

is what I think makes us in particular stay on some stand by ur man-isms...that's what my coworker said almost verbatim

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

I never said that until we were over. While we were together, I didn't have an answer at all.

..but I see where you're coming from

-----------------------------
"Since it is art that translates civilization from one generation to the next, "art" is a quality-of-life need that cannot be disputed."

u had the ability and strength to leave

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

Had he not moved (the perfect opportunity) I'm not sure when I would've left. Or IF for that matter. I just thank God that I've been blessed enough to find someone else and new friends who see the harm and unacceptability in those sorts of actions.

-----------------------------
"Since it is art that translates civilization from one generation to the next, "art" is a quality-of-life need that cannot be disputed."

and everything was fine for a while then he started beating her ass. one day she had had enough, so she defended herself and stabbed his punk ass. sad, the marriage only lasted 6 months. but dude got what he deserved, cause he's a fucking loser.

often times people make mistakes or get themselves in situations, but its learning and knowing if a situation is healthy or not that can determine the kind of person you are or will be or what your child may become.

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. - Mark Twain

i've seen this repeated many times 'I wish a nigga would".

what would you do in that case?

the sentiment towards domestic or any kind of physical violence from a man was "I WISH HE WOULD" as in he better not ever even think about laying his hands on u or u'd ((insert violent act)) and in retrospect and upon further inspection sometimes it definitely was an act

I say I wish he would cuz I'd kill him alive in his sleep by calling the homies however I could, but I mean I guess u never know

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

domestic violence is a not something people are willing to talk about and it happens in more families than we believe.

it's not really talked about to my knowledge in our community in a serious way or an honest way

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

we won't, but it's really likely that we will.
And then what?

my oldest son's father tried that sh*t a few times. i had him escorted out by Metro PD, and he wasn't on the lease either? pshaaaw.

my husbnd has pushed me down and stuff but i understood where it came from. pple are human and subject to human responses, at times.

i would never stand for sustained physical abuse though.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage ~ ANAIS NIN

you females always say there is no excuse for a nigga to hit a female.then u come out with 300 excuses for them when they slap you around...

any woman that stays in an abusive relationship is stupid. period; and they deserve every ass whoopen they get after the first one, just look at it as a "you dummy" smack for stayen with his ass....

never once, did i say my husband ABUSED me. he's never hit me with a fist or even slapped me around. we've both gotten into it, he's restrained me, pushed me down on the bed, sideswiped me about 3 times in our 7 year marriage.

again, each time i understood exactly where it came from. in some countries women have been KILLED for some of the things i've done. and i've hit him as many times as well so, is HE being abused?

my verbal abuse alone is enough to make a person react. u have no clue what i can be like. but like i said, i'd never stand for consistent, sustained physical abuse.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage ~ ANAIS NIN

he's restrained me, pushed me down on the bed,
>sideswiped me about 3 times in our 7 year marriage.

that's abuse you stupid woman.

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

My husband worked with a woman who's husband was abusive. She stayed with him long enough to have a baby. When the baby was less than a year she left him. He BRUTALLY murdered her and left the child with her dead body. He later went to prison and knew he would be facing a death penality so he killed himself.

A lot of people he worked with knew she was being abused. No one offered to ever help her.

to it more times than i care to remember. sometimes, there was no rhyme or reason to the male's violent behavior. but many times the woman herself had a violent nature & wouldn't stop until there was some type of incident. i know it's a cycle, but it has to stop somewhere. the woman would fight the man & many times hold her own, but there are no winners in such fights. and really, the man is naturally stronger, so it's fighting a losing battle on so many levels. violence whether physical or passive aggressive has no place in a relationship. they think kids don't see, but they do. they remember. everything. i have flashbacks myself. i know i'm scarred. but not so scarred that i'm unable to process what i've experienced & see that i don't repeat it.

æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦ æ ¦
so much going on
people killing
people dying

Someone out there knows what happened to Mitrice Richardson

i know i'm
>scarred. but not so scarred that i'm unable to process what
>i've experienced & see that i don't repeat it.
>

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

& i was like, "there is never a reason for a man to put his hands on a woman, no matter WHAT he does!!!"

& my mother proceeded to tell me not to be so certain, everyone has a point to not be pushed beyond...never taunt any man thinkin he won't

i understood where she was comin frum, eventually




care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


_______________________________




¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

_____________
Kamikaze Genes
____________♌♀
goddess; small g.

but as a man, I pray that I will have enough control to leave the room or the house if my significant other was trippin' or taunting me.

Sites that I contribute to:

http://www.livefrommemphis.com

http://www.geeksofdoom.com

but sometimes...

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

The few times when a woman has pissed me off, I usually cuss them out and walk off, or I just walk off. I just pray that I would never put my hands on a woman. It seems very punkish to beat a woman. I have a cousin whose first babydaddy used to hit her. That crap angered me. Of course, I never confronted her. I just got my mama to tell her mama. I will try to remember my cousin's black eye when I am angered.

Sites that I contribute to:

http://www.livefrommemphis.com

http://www.geeksofdoom.com

indeed
think of the black eye

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

cuz the reality is I can't/won't always be there to keep randumbnigga out of her life.

anybody who can hit you and still want to continue a day to day relationship with you, (esp. if there aren't kids, and the situation involved a disagreement anywhere below the level of <insert ultimately disrespectful/damaging act here>) is crazy. period. if you do something that makes me want to hit you, I don't want to be around you anymore, or at least not in the capacity that lead to me wanting to beat your ass. and if a person hits me, either I already didn't like them to do whatever lead to the hitting, or it was undeserved and, why the FUCK would I want to be around such a mentally unbalanced person?


But love/lust etc. makes it hard to see clear, and then even when it IS clear, it's "oh, it's too late now, I deserve what I've got"

so what do I do?


a.k.a. reggie jack

"Smith barney?, buncha bitches"
"This ain't Trading Places nigga, protect your fucking neck" - Wu Tang financial, for you and your kids

My Diary:


"2.As essence said,Pistons will return to sucking donkey balls,and will be 10 games below .500.They score less than A.C. Green." - cantball

"creative differences.....them niggas wanted more money and I was doin all the work" - von p on the breakup of the waas


Free....a manwhore no more

www.engadgethd.com - the other stuff i'm looking at

make urself a trustworthy and non judgemental source

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

how do I reverse 20 years of me putting her down and one upping her in the sibling rivalry every chance I got?

note - we are closer now, but, shit. cats make mistakes


a.k.a. reggie jack

"Smith barney?, buncha bitches"
"This ain't Trading Places nigga, protect your fucking neck" - Wu Tang financial, for you and your kids

My Diary:


"2.As essence said,Pistons will return to sucking donkey balls,and will be 10 games below .500.They score less than A.C. Green." - cantball

"creative differences.....them niggas wanted more money and I was doin all the work" - von p on the breakup of the waas


Free....a manwhore no more

www.engadgethd.com - the other stuff i'm looking at

I dunno
me and my sis have the same stuff
approach her like an adult, speak to her like one, let her know u respect and value her opinions and experiences, and dish a lil dirt about urself too
lol

you post...like a *BITCH*

-------------------

fuck it.
take ur fried chicken and move to Nantucket: www.freestateproject.org

educate her that physical abuse is usually preceeded by mental/emotional abuse

if he makes u feel sad...he's not the one

abuse can be both isolatin & immobilizin

what'll happen is that the person bein abused'll feel a host of emotions, namely shame & won't feel able to face the ppl closest to them who think highly of them for fear of humiliation...so they'll be silent & wind up dependin on the relationship mostly because "he" is the only other person who knows what's goin on...odd??? yes...sick??? maybe

the immobilizin fact is that when ppl learn of their loved ones bein abused they really are torn as to what to actually do, because what u feel & what is logical don't always coincide...women don't want to see their family members in jail behind shit like this, despite their possible wantin of their abusers stopped

but u tell her, no matter what, no matter how many times should she be so involved that u'll always support her desire to break free...most women leave more than once before stayin gone...i think it's like 3 times before they're out for good

tell her u love her, tell her love doesn't hurt, tell her she'll always have u, tell her she'll always have herself

& yeah, u can tell her to tell any potentials that her brother'll get in that ass, too

couldn't hurt


care to make ur moderatoresses all nipply???


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¤orange popcicles & lemonade¤

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Kamikaze Genes
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goddess; small g.

i could never imagine myself being being beat up by anyone. Maybe it's my standards or my upbringing. I personally see any man or PERSON that would hit or beat up on someone that was obviously not in any position to defend themselves as a coward. Not only that, but i'm quicker to leave someone than to stick around.

That doesn't mean i'd never be hit, that just means that i'd never be hit twice. I have been "playing around" with guys and had them hit me. I've also hit back. Enough about me.

Basically, it doesn't always boil down to self esteem and self worth, because there are always points in people's lives where they can be affected by what another says. People aren't up all the time. It can be boiled down to people being aware of reality and truth without the excuses and accepting people for who they are, not who they profess to be.

From my knowledge, i believe when a person is in an adult relationship, they stick around after the first few beatings because the other person comes back bearing gifts and "heartfelt" apologies and promises. And when one believes they love the other person and are loved by the other person, glossing over the reality of the situation for the fantasy is easier on your head. Nobody dreams of being abused, so it's easier to pretend it never happened.

The key, IMO, is to teach our children to accept reality and look at it clearly. Not only that, but i am anti-apology and will teach my kids that. Apologies aren't acceptable when you meant to do what you did, and you'd be hard pressed to explain how in most cases people do things that they didn't mean to do...excluding real accidents and politeness.


~"The meat is full of shit." -Fast Food Nation~

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((¸¸.·´ ..·´ -:¦:- Marla -:¦:-
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