this is an ongoing debate i have with my sister.
she doesn't feel that men should approach her on the street for any reason.

i said, although she obviously has the right to walk down the street
without being groped, grabbed, or otherwise threatened,
she does not have the right to not get approached for conversation in the street.

my take on this is that she-- like me-- is an introvert,
and as an introvert, she doesn't really want to talk to ppl, for the most part.
especially when it comes to benign, tedious topics that ppl typically
break the ice with when first meeting.

but that doesn't mean she has a right to not be spoken to in public.
because nobody has a right to not be annoyed by ppl.


this seems to be a big sticking point for some ppl on these boards,
so i wanted to bring it up here.


obviously, this post is not about about dudes that grope, grab, poke, or otherwise invade your personal space.

nor is it about dudes that persist in talking after you've told them to go away,
or dudes that holler at you and then keep hollering after you've said you're not
interested.

i am sure even bloocolar understands that this behavior is foul.
i am talking about a dude trying to do numbers (or maybe a goofy dude
that is just overly friendly and doesn't think it's weird to talk to random ppl on the street)
that strikes up a conversation, and maybe hollers at you if he thinks
it's going well.


is THAT street harassment.

i say it ain't.
she says it is.
we've had this ongoing debate for 2 years.

curious about your thoughts.

Poll result (48 votes) a man talking to a woman on the street, for any reason. (3 votes) Vote a man putting a bid in to a woman on the street, for any reason. (4 votes) Vote a man continuing to put a bid in after she says she ain't interested. (41 votes) Vote

mind
--------
matter

Especially when the intended target is whoever walks by.

Especially when it's more than one dude standing together.

Especially when it includes the word mommy.

I feel for you, ladies. Like Chaka Khan.

That crap is kinda hideous.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

still, i think the dudes doing have just as much a right to be there
as the ppl telling me about the goodness of our lord and savior jesus christ.

annoying, or sure.
but i don't have a right to not be annoyed.

ppl are annoying, that's life.

Know why punchin girls in the street isn't an effective holla? Nobody goes for it.

But some chicks are receptive on the street. Like McDonald's wifi. So thirsty guys continue because it works even .15% of the time.

When the Nat'l Assoc of Ladies decides to universally look straight ahead and keep walkin consistently for 12 years straight, the street hollar will die. Just like caveman clubbin did.

But until then, I still have to suffer through my misophonia in public spaces when the "I think I'm cute" voice is being employed.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

when a man speaks to her?
when a man puts in a bid?


i hate it when ppl speak to me at mall kiosks.
but like, they have a right to be there.
annoying as fuck, but they aren't harassing me.


>Know why punchin girls in the street isn't an effective
>holla? Nobody goes for it.
>
>But some chicks are receptive on the street. Like McDonald's
>wifi. So thirsty guys continue because it works even .15% of
>the time.
>
>When the Nat'l Assoc of Ladies decides to universally look
>straight ahead and keep walkin consistently for 12 years
>straight, the street hollar will die. Just like caveman
>clubbin did.
>
>But until then, I still have to suffer through my misophonia
>in public spaces when the "I think I'm cute" voice is being
>employed.

We already have to suffer through pop-under ads, youtube ads, mall kiosk people, assorted religious salesmen...

Why be one more forced interaction in a day FULL of forced interactions?

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

but living in a society means there is a certain amount of
bullshit you will have to deal with.

i don't have a right to not be annoyed.
if i did, ppl that ask me about my weekend when they don't want to know the answer
would be fined or something.

>We already have to suffer through pop-under ads, youtube ads,
>mall kiosk people, assorted religious salesmen...
>
>Why be one more forced interaction in a day FULL of forced
>interactions?
>

You work together. You can't be silent for 8 hours and go home.

On the street, you can absolutely STFU and continue on your path.

But like I mentioned, the most egregious are the stoop trolls who essentially make interacting with them an unofficial toll for daring to use their infrastructure.

Those people should absolutely be ignored. And their response at being ignored generally indicates their overall value as human beings.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

>On the street, you can absolutely STFU and continue on your
>path.

and i've done that to ppl trying to speak to me on the street.
but if they weren't invading my space, it's not harassment.
it's just something annoying that happens.


>But like I mentioned, the most egregious are the stoop trolls
>who essentially make interacting with them an unofficial toll
>for daring to use their infrastructure.
>
>Those people should absolutely be ignored. And their response
>at being ignored generally indicates their overall value as
>human beings.

I meant the others who would assail you with words.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

if i had a magic wand, there are a gang of ppl i would
make mute, just so i wouldn't have to hear their shit.

but this isn't joe corn mo's fantasy land.
it's a society.

in society, some ppl are annoying.
you just deal.

Herding animals off cliffs for meat.

Heroin for teething babies.

Elevator operators.

Street hollars.

War is over if you want it, said John. If the desired effect is lost, the efforts will diminish.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

IN the mall, a kiosk approach is expected. And you put yourself in the mall. So...

In a bar, somebody offers you a drink. You went to a bar.

On the street, you wanna get from point A to B. Anybody who invades that process is generally unwelcome, be they slow driver, oblivious pedestrian or libidinous loudmouth linestepper.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

this man gets it!


"i wanna hug all u idiotic bastards & then set you all on fire" -Bin

www.twitter.com/bedstuybetty
http://bedstuybetty.tumblr.com/
DROkayplayer: Giving you good puff since May '05

They might stop. Just cause it can be skin-crawlingly douchetastic.

Da bayball, babeh. (c) Charlie Kelly.

http://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=4&topic_id=11845047&mesg_id=11845047&listing_type=search#12425362

blue possibly but the word harrassment seems a bit strong for blue

prototype

stand ur ground, believe in urself,
believe in love, prepare urself for love, remove the negativity from ur life, and accept the love u kno u deserve

---
http://twitter.com/logicalhood
http://instagram.com/hoodlogic

that don't dudes saying ANYTHING to them
not even hello

I'm one of those introverts that only breaks out of it to be helpful usually.

Outside of that, if no one talked to me, life would be great



"i wanna hug all u idiotic bastards & then set you all on fire" -Bin

www.twitter.com/bedstuybetty
http://bedstuybetty.tumblr.com/
DROkayplayer: Giving you good puff since May '05

believe me.

I wonder if people realize that not speaking to every person you pass by is viewed as a negative thing in some places

Where my parents are from in Alabama EVERYBODY speaks to each other. It's probably a crazy thing to see if you've never experienced it. If your driving a car and ride by some people you've never seen before on a porch chilling you wave.

These are the kind of things I think about when it comes to engaging strangers. Some people are jerks about it, but then you have those that were just raised to think that its ok.

BUY SOMETHING PLEASE ---> www.estherwoovintage.com

"people... please refrain from gnr'ing me. im an avid lol'er and am completely fine wit the service."

"I’m just a dreamer,
turned true to life leaner...
Born to do good so others can be believers"

>I wonder if people realize that not speaking to every person
>you pass by is viewed as a negative thing in some places
>
>Where my parents are from in Alabama EVERYBODY speaks to each
>other. It's probably a crazy thing to see if you've never
>experienced it. If your driving a car and ride by some people
>you've never seen before on a porch chilling you wave.
>
>These are the kind of things I think about when it comes to
>engaging strangers. Some people are jerks about it, but then
>you have those that were just raised to think that its ok.

Everybody DOES have an attitude in Tha D, but because many of the older generations in Detroit came from southern states, they can be rather cordial and rasied much of the younger folks to be the same.

When I would visit family in Dallas, same thing. Strangers speak to one another.

Even in my super white ass suburb in Phoenix, people waved and said hello all the time and kept it moving. When I lived in a predominately latino area of PHX it was still the same.

---------------------------

I miss Tha D... But I'll never move back there.


R.I.P. Disco D

and/or threatening shit not really expecting you to stop and speak but they feel like they just have to say whatever weird shit they had to say at the moment. almost like tourettes

www.royallegacy.org
http://therapfest.com/up-next-artists/

before you even get a chance to not be interested

No "Excuse can you tell me what time it is?"

No "Can you tell me how to get to such and such street?"

Not even "Hey, have you seen my missing Daughter?!?!"

R.I.P. Loud But Wrong Guy
Dec 29th 2009 - Dec 17th 2017

ppl annoyed by everything before green
are probably annoyed by ppl in public.

which is understandable, of course.
but it's not harassment.


>No "Excuse can you tell me what time it is?"
>
>No "Can you tell me how to get to such and such street?"
>
>Not even "Hey, have you seen my missing Daughter?!?!"

>No "Excuse can you tell me what time it is?"
>
>No "Can you tell me how to get to such and such street?"
>
>Not even "Hey, have you seen my missing Daughter?!?!"

None of the above are harassment, but the feminazi will take it as such. In fact, she may cry "RAPE" then tell you to check your privilege as your run away.

This is a horrible time to be a single man in America. I got a lotta play from the street holler back in the day, but I was typically by myself. Nowadays y'all can't street holler, any type of advancement towards women is seen as hostile, no cat calls (that's a precursor to rape, you know...), no convo at the laundrymat, can't spit game on the bus/train/subway, can't do shit.



---------------------------

I miss Tha D... But I'll never move back there.


R.I.P. Disco D

>>No "Excuse can you tell me what time it is?"
>>
>>No "Can you tell me how to get to such and such street?"
and what you just typed is ridiculous to me.


>None of the above are harassment, but the feminazi will take
>it as such. In fact, she may cry "RAPE" then tell you to check
>your privilege as your run away.
>

again, huh?
i ain't heard of that.

i suspect that you haven't either.
but you want to reduce feminism to being a series
of absurd arguments that nobody makes in real life.

go ahead and cook, though.



>Nowadays y'all can't street holler, any
>type of advancement towards women is seen as hostile, no cat
>calls (that's a precursor to rape, you know...),

that seems hella desperate to me.

> no convo at
>the laundrymat,

i have gotten play from striking up a conversation at the laundrymat,
so i dunno what you mean. and how is this relevant to the post...
we talking about speaking to women on the street.

>can't spit game on the bus/train/subway, can't
>do shit.
>
>

i have gotten play from the subway/ train/ bus.
i don't think anybody felt uncomfortable with the situation.
but hey, what do i know.

and anyway, we are talking about ppl on the street.

>>>No "Excuse can you tell me what time it is?"
>>>
>>>No "Can you tell me how to get to such and such street?"
>and what you just typed is ridiculous to me.
>
>
>>None of the above are harassment, but the feminazi will take
>>it as such. In fact, she may cry "RAPE" then tell you to
>check
>>your privilege as your run away.
>>
>
>again, huh?
>i ain't heard of that.
>
>i suspect that you haven't either.
>but you want to reduce feminism to being a series
>of absurd arguments that nobody makes in real life.
>
>go ahead and cook, though.

It was halfheartedly a joke.



>
>
>
>>Nowadays y'all can't street holler, any
>>type of advancement towards women is seen as hostile, no cat
>>calls (that's a precursor to rape, you know...),
>
>that seems hella desperate to me.

That's because you're not of my generation, where the shit happened all the time. Men AND women engaged in the street holler back inna day. When I said I got a lot of play that way I wasn't just referring to me hollering at chicks. I've had women roll up on me while I was walking on some "damn you cute" shits or stop me while I'm walking in the opposite direction.

>
>> no convo at
>>the laundrymat,
>
>i have gotten play from striking up a conversation at the
>laundrymat,
>so i dunno what you mean. and how is this relevant to the
>post...
>we talking about speaking to women on the street.

It's part of the general atmosphere being created by this "everything is harassment" attitude.

>>can't spit game on the bus/train/subway, can't
>>do shit.
>>
>>
>
>i have gotten play from the subway/ train/ bus.
>i don't think anybody felt uncomfortable with the situation.
>but hey, what do i know.
>
>and anyway, we are talking about ppl on the street.

^^^ see above.
---------------------------

I miss Tha D... But I'll never move back there.


R.I.P. Disco D

so far, only Ifresh has said anything that indicates
she'd vote anything other than green.

and the poll, at least so far, is almost nothing but green votes.
so what are you talking about?
i don't think there is an "everything is harassment" attitude.

i haven't seen it on OKP.
nor have i seen it in real life.

so attempts to make it sound like THIS is a thing that is happening...


>It's part of the general atmosphere being created by this
>"everything is harassment" attitude.
>
>>>can't spit game on the bus/train/subway, can't
>>>do shit.


sounds like an attempt to marginalize issues of harassment
that women DO have to deal with.

which of course, i can't cosign.

wtf ^^^^^

just don't worry about it then.

>wtf ^^^^^

dude walked up to me today
no not to holla
askng for money
i have my wallet in hand getting a metro card

get your funky ass out of my damn space while i'm dealing with my money
wtf is WRONG with yall?


no you are NOT entitled to my attention
~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

can't even compare the two.

---------------------------

I miss Tha D... But I'll never move back there.


R.I.P. Disco D

but was he harassing you?
that's the question here.

i assumed that the man asking you for money was not violating your personal space.
people that ask me for money usually keep their distance from me when asking for money.

they ask, and i either give, or don't.
engage in coversation, or don't.
they aren't entitled to my attention (i can keep walking)
but they aren't harassing me.


that being said, maybe this guy WAS in your personal space.
if he was, he was obviously wrong for that.

if man keeps his distance, do you
still consider that harassment?



>dude walked up to me today
>no not to holla
>askng for money
>i have my wallet in hand getting a metro card
>
>get your funky ass out of my damn space while i'm dealing with
>my money
>wtf is WRONG with yall?
>
>
>no you are NOT entitled to my attention

if i have my wallet out doing a transaction
YES you are violating my personal space

i asked him to walk away
after that it sou have been harassment



all this to say
whatever it is

you are NOT entitled to my attention period


~~~~
When you are born, you cry, and the world rejoices. Live so that when you die, you rejoice, and the world cries.
~~~~
You cannot hate people for their own good.

>
>all this to say
>whatever it is
>
>you are NOT entitled to my attention period
>


nobody is.
that's a given.

if he was violating your personal space,
he's wrong.

(bearing in mind that how much personal space you are entitled to varries.
in a subway, i can't expect a 2 foot wide bubble of personal space.
i probably can reasonably expect more if i am at an ATM machine,
or maybe if i am reaching for my wallet to ride the metro).