(I'm assuming that we're at your average mid-range sit down restaurant. Anything higher and the options become too varied to really discuss.)

God Tier -

1) Chicken Wings - A king among kings. (of course with bones)
2) Quesadillas
3) Fried Raviolis - This was a toss up btw fried raviolis and mozzarella sticks, but in my opinion raviolis win because the outer coating tends to be crispier and they are not as common as mozzarella sticks.

Average Tier -

1) Chips and Dip - Good but so easy to fuck up. Chips have to be fresh and hot. Dips have to have the perfect consistency and not be too salty. Often the ratio of chips to dip is off, resulting in wasted food. A good fallback with a crowd.
2) Nachos - At this point don't even call them appetizer, most places sell them entree sized. In my case often requires quite a bit of modification since I'm (a little bit) picky. Wings are worth the effort, but sometimes you don't want to eat with your hands, and nachos are not usually worth dirtied hands.
3) Anything shrimp themed - Too often the shrimp is farmed and tasteless. Tend to have a stupidly high amount of bread/coating with a poor ratio of shrimp. Also not worth the possibility of not being cleaned right; nobody is trying to eat the digestive track of these shits.

Garbage Tier -

1) Fried Pickles - Fucking gross.
2) Boneless Wings - You might as well eat dog food if you eating this shit.
3) Calamari particularly calamari rings - This might be psychosomatic, but all I can think of is the rumor that calamari is pig rectum and I just can't do it. Once you get into nicer places you tend to get whole calamari, but at this point I never order calamari rings.

(Jalapeno poppers would fall somewhere btw average tier and garbage tier by the way. Worth tasting one if somebody else orders it, but not worth getting an entire order's worth)

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I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

— F. Scott Fitzgerald