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Subject: "And then they double down & tell the lady who she can or can't speak to...." Previous topic | Next topic
Creole
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Tue Jun-18-19 11:37 AM

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138. "And then they double down & tell the lady who she can or can't speak to...."
In response to In response to 135


  

          

If you gotta do all of that, the relationship ain't for you at that moment.

Person A should do what they believe is best for their relationship with Person B if Person B is important enough to them.

Person B should not attempt to control Person A since that may bring about resentment and, as said above, is a waste of energy.

You can't go around checkin people because they do you dirty,. You voice your feelings and/or the facts. Then if you care enough, you observe to see if changes are made for the best interest of the relationship. If you don't care enough, you kick rocks and deal with the pain of being hurt by someone you allowed to intimately build with you.


Saying, "It's hurtful to me for you to talk to or plan to spend time with guys whom I don't know" is COMPLETELY different from saying, "You better not talk to that nukka again or..."

--- praying for peace, love, and power

  

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How have you handled your S.O emotionally "cheating" ? [View all] , j., Thu Jun-13-19 02:16 PM
 
Subject Author Message Date ID
she has a friend she would probably fuck if you were not together?
Jun 13th 2019
1
Maybe. I can't call it
Jun 13th 2019
3
      If she’s doing this while with you...
Jun 13th 2019
6
get yourself a new "friend" and let it be known
Jun 13th 2019
2
I got divorced.
Jun 13th 2019
4
If we ain’t married I’m canceling her ass like Nino Brown
Jun 13th 2019
5
Talk to your spouse!!! OPENLY
Jun 13th 2019
7
this is good...thank you for sharing that
Jun 13th 2019
15
To be clear though: the man who you decided to cheat with was NOT
Jun 13th 2019
21
      Someone I saw frequently in a work-like setting
Jun 13th 2019
24
           Ok, I totally hear you.
Jun 13th 2019
42
           This is why I made the married man sex rejection post
Jun 14th 2019
51
"Don't ever talk to a girl...
Jun 13th 2019
8
Hmmm... Can I ask to what degree you can confirm the "cheating" part?
Jun 13th 2019
9
banking
Jun 13th 2019
27
      I see. Were you gone on your trip for a long period? Sounds like weeks
Jun 13th 2019
43
      TELL HER. have a conversation. say how you're feeling
Jun 15th 2019
78
If she leaves, she leaves
Jun 13th 2019
10
the difference in tone between replies from women vs replies from men
Jun 13th 2019
11
Haha.. right.
Jun 13th 2019
19
Ahh..I'll be back...but I was the "cheater"
Jun 13th 2019
12
As long as it doesn't cross the line into an actual relationship...
Jun 13th 2019
13
There absolutely is insecurity involved here, whether his partner
Jun 13th 2019
16
      Communication about infedilty seems like it doesn't work
Jun 13th 2019
18
      Hm. Welp. My read is there's absolutlely zero evidence of infidelity
Jun 13th 2019
39
           You could be 100% right.
Jun 14th 2019
52
                this happens way more during happy times.
Jun 14th 2019
54
                     I respectfully disagree
Jun 14th 2019
58
                          cool.
Jun 14th 2019
60
                               Word
Jun 14th 2019
61
      No one wants to have a hard convo anymore
Jun 13th 2019
30
           Exactly.
Jun 13th 2019
37
There will be POAST!
Jun 13th 2019
14
She invited me to a work happy hour tomorrow
Jun 13th 2019
17
So how do you know she is emotionally cheating?
Jun 13th 2019
22
my gut feeling is blinking red
Jun 13th 2019
28
      When you know, you know!!!
Jun 13th 2019
38
dont bring it up.
Jun 13th 2019
25
^ THIS 100x
Jun 13th 2019
33
talk to her tonight so you can enjoy the happy hour
Jun 13th 2019
26
Go thru her phone like Drake first.
Jun 13th 2019
29
I think yall should def talk about it. But AFTER the hh. Observe 1st.
Jun 13th 2019
35
This is my plan, however dude may not show
Jun 14th 2019
53
Have a few drinks and then confront the guy
Jun 13th 2019
40
      LMAO Please don't do this!
Jun 14th 2019
50
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXP4GHw8_XM
Jun 14th 2019
59
           Classic scene.
Jun 15th 2019
73
      *jack nicholson heafnod gif*
Jun 15th 2019
71
           LOL! ! !
Jun 15th 2019
75
i once had a work wife
Jun 13th 2019
20
she playin' that good ole' "I have options" game
Jun 13th 2019
23
TERRIBLE ADVICE!!!!
Jun 13th 2019
31
It's good advice, just for the wrong reasons
Jun 13th 2019
32
that's exactly what i meant..never said nothin about doing it for her
Jun 13th 2019
41
Prove to her? Prove what? The advice is for HIM!
Jun 13th 2019
34
You gave great advice here though
Jun 13th 2019
36
I can smoke a bag of that...
Jun 13th 2019
46
While he’s at the gym pumping iron
Jun 13th 2019
44
      What you trying to say? Other dude's gonna be pumping something else?
Jun 14th 2019
55
           I mean...
Jun 14th 2019
56
definitely confront the other guy, best to do it where they work too
Jun 13th 2019
45
but if you go the punch route plz bring a friend to livestream it
Jun 13th 2019
47
So yeah...I had an emotional affair
Jun 13th 2019
48
If you’re the Roy to your woman’s Pam
Jun 14th 2019
49
This was also an episode of Friends. OKP biting old episodes now.
Jun 14th 2019
64
It's probably a wrap
Jun 14th 2019
57
If you know you know.
Jun 14th 2019
62
Damn. That’s some real shit
Jun 14th 2019
63
I hate to see another nigga go through it man.
Jun 14th 2019
65
      LOL. Real shit tho.....
Jun 14th 2019
66
This is why the early conversation doesn't work.
Jun 14th 2019
67
Only advice you NEED is here.
Jun 14th 2019
69
I'm sorry but checks >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> dick and it's not even close.
Jun 15th 2019
72
      Call Center for $1500, Alex.
Jun 15th 2019
74
      LO fucking L
Jun 15th 2019
76
           Almost my whole career has been public sector corporate environments
Jun 15th 2019
77
                Get your money sis, but this post ain't about you.
Jun 15th 2019
79
                     Exactly.
Jun 15th 2019
80
                     You're right, it's not. And you're right, the OP's girl may be more
Jun 15th 2019
82
                          Based on what?
Jun 15th 2019
83
                               Not really interested in taking this back + forth too much further, but:
Jun 16th 2019
84
What do men expect when they allow their wives to work lol
Jun 14th 2019
68
wow.
Jun 15th 2019
70
lol fam
Jun 15th 2019
81
lawdy
Jun 17th 2019
99
Update: spoke my piece, she spoke hers
Jun 17th 2019
85
the fact that hangout attempts was going on and you had no clue
Jun 17th 2019
86
Noted and that's what I focused on
Jun 17th 2019
92
lol this is just the beginning.
Jun 17th 2019
87
Ionno man.
Jun 17th 2019
88
The picnic and group plans happened when I was on a trip
Jun 17th 2019
90
um
Jun 17th 2019
109
      Bring that same energy to reply 111...
Jun 19th 2019
144
           I had a feeling someone might go here. My exact words were:
Jun 19th 2019
145
           Exactly.
Jun 19th 2019
151
THIS
Jun 17th 2019
91
      I get it. He’s out of town. She wants to do “something”
Jun 17th 2019
93
           Ya that part sounded more like she was just having a hard time
Jun 17th 2019
101
good luck
Jun 17th 2019
89
Time to start *planning* that escape, bruh
Jun 17th 2019
94
Especially since he is married and HE flaked out
Jun 17th 2019
95
      she said she would stop texting dude..the hell they texting about? Work?
Jun 17th 2019
96
           Prolly dumb shit.
Jun 17th 2019
97
                Always starts off work then it moves into personal
Jun 17th 2019
105
                     Yup. I had an ex
Jun 17th 2019
106
                     But this "IS" a key difference though:
Jun 17th 2019
111
                          would she even admit to being attracted if she was?
Jun 17th 2019
113
                          That's hanging in the balance for any relationship though
Jun 17th 2019
115
                          Hey kfine it's me again. This is so us
Jun 17th 2019
114
                          LOL but you have absolutely no basis on which to confirm her attraction
Jun 17th 2019
117
                               I got platonic friends
Jun 17th 2019
120
                          Well YOU didn’t hear about it when single
Jun 17th 2019
116
                          I dunno man...I hear you.. but at this point I'm starting to think workp...
Jun 17th 2019
119
                               I don’t think this has anything to do with workplace culture
Jun 18th 2019
123
                                    Yall are really trying to push this "it's everywhere you just dont know"
Jun 18th 2019
139
                          ^ ^ ^Typical non-accountability-having female.
Jun 19th 2019
152
He sounds trifling + your girl sounds like she was vulnerable/exploitabl...
Jun 17th 2019
98
the picnic was perfect for that and right on her being vulnerable
Jun 17th 2019
104
      I hear you on everything you wrote.
Jun 17th 2019
107
      Dude know she not alone. He just don't give a fuck
Jun 17th 2019
112
           or he was there.. lol.
Jun 17th 2019
118
                Dude prob rolled through on the low, peeped J and bounced....
Jun 18th 2019
121
I feel like we're sorely missing a woman's POV here
Jun 17th 2019
100
I am a woman and I've been all up in this post lol. There's been a few
Jun 17th 2019
102
Good for you for speaking up. That's what relationships are all about...
Jun 17th 2019
103
Word to all of that.
Jun 17th 2019
108
i echo this. Bravo for speaking up and out.
Jun 17th 2019
110
You need another conversation
Jun 18th 2019
136
Real talk; you got trust issues fam. And they're gonna eat you up
Jun 18th 2019
122
True
Jun 18th 2019
124
That's the thing...insecurity is only a problem for the person that's in...
Jun 18th 2019
126
      Not sure how much college counts
Jun 18th 2019
130
Not for nothing I followed similar advice and y'all know my story
Jun 18th 2019
125
if my intuition is blinking red and the vibe is off I'm speaking on it
Jun 18th 2019
127
Good stuff. What I said was predicated on you speaking your peace &
Jun 18th 2019
133
This perspective is harmful, man. It dismisss his feelings, his...
Jun 18th 2019
128
I don’t think anyone is wrong in this thread
Jun 18th 2019
131
Peep my post 133... wasn't dismissing his feelings...
Jun 18th 2019
134
      Personally, I prefer both A & a version of B at the same time
Jun 18th 2019
140
           One of the other problems is having people in your corner who would...
Jun 18th 2019
141
he had valid reasons to bring this up to her.
Jun 18th 2019
129
Check the S/O; not the person they are SUPPOSEDLY cheating with...
Jun 18th 2019
132
I hate when dudes want to fight because their girl cheated
Jun 18th 2019
135
      lol it be the principle though
Jun 18th 2019
137
     
The End
Jun 19th 2019
149
this thread makes me miss Maury, Sally Jesse, Jenny Jones, Jerry...
Jun 18th 2019
142
damn...
Jun 18th 2019
143
No
Jun 19th 2019
146
      good..
Jun 19th 2019
147
           Do you put on Vaseline before you meet the other woman?
Jun 19th 2019
148
                you read it wrong...
Jun 19th 2019
150
                     it reads like you're
Jun 20th 2019
153
                     Ok. I get it now.
Jun 20th 2019
154

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