48. "It absolutely has the feel of death. It was almost like experiencing " In response to In response to 39
a sudden death. The past month that led to her coming out had an ominous feel to it, but there was still hope that with some serious soul-searching and counseling, we'd work things out. After all, I was in this for the long haul. I had no intentions of ever stepping out and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with her. The first month was really terrible. I cried and cried often. I tried to make sense of what the hell happened. With time, I slowly began to realize that us separating was the only logical choice moving forward and I began to visualize life with someone else. The pain of our relationship ending still stings, but I'm definitely over her. I guess it helps when your spouse turns gay because there's a finality to things. Like, I know I'm never going back (and neither is she) so it's best to move forward.
I'm in a good place right now (all things considered), but still very anxious about the impact this may have on our kids.