One time in college I got super hammered and really I have no idea why. I had drank a bunch of Southern Comfort 100 (which I hated even before this incident) and gotten pretty ripped before we went out. At some point I found myself in a soccer field, losing shit (lost my glasses, somehow recovered my Phillies fitted).

Some guy rolled up, picked me up and drove me to my house. In my blackout drunk mind, I thought he was a taxi. I suspect what I was certain was a meter was actually his fucking car stereo. I tried to give him double the "fare" (it was 1067 or something, again possibly a radio station) and he wouldn't take any money. He dropped me at my front door, and then I remember throwing up for a while.

On a higher note, I went to visit grad schools where I got accepted and the secretary in the department told me "Hold off on making a decision, we've got a scholarship offer out and the kid sounds wobbly." Sure enough, the other student went another way and I went from just a regular ass admission to having a full ride plus a stipend. This woman never met me before, she just did it off a file and a hunch. These were literally the first words she said to me.

And you will know MY JACKET IS GOLD when I lay my vengeance upon thee.