There was one mom who had to be hospitalized for it. After a while she just stopped being able to cope.

I see it in the faces of so many others. Goes back to the point about communication not being the clearest. They blame themselves and feel so helpless in doing anything about it. And if what they are doing takes a turn for the worse they may outwardly blame the doctors and such, but internally it all goes back on them.

Then there are those who feel burdened and blame the child. Those are the hardest. It is of course a deflection for their own guilt but it can really be harsh. The why'd you have to get sick, or why do I have to put so much effort into this for you.

There is 'support' available in the hospital but again this from people who don't look like the parents, don't talk like the parents and ultimately can't really relate to what the parents are going through. So the parents don't go to them. One of the counselors was so happy that me and my wife were asking questions and being proactive in the care, primarily because it just doesn't happen. She of course would offer but the receptivity isn't there because ultimately the trust isn't there.

Again the issues with this go far beyond just what's on the surface but into the very threads of the fabric that make up our social order. Such complex shit, that nobody really addresses head on. I don't know, my wife does as much as she can to help folk understand, but we've got to deal as well.


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Big PEMFin H & z's
"I ain't no entertainer, and ain't trying to be one. I am 1 thing, a musician." © Miles

"When the music stops he falls back in the abyss."