my brother in aw had a 3 day long traditional wedding and we joke that the whole 3 days were recorded uncut (it was a *long* video)
our family is christian, so i donno about summa what you mentioned, but the worth proving and dowry and things were part of the ceremony
the thing is that in a traditional family and/or community, people tend to see/acknowledge/interact with the people around them for what they are. the desire to surround yourself with similar people and to classify yourself as a certain type of people is a western thing that is far out of hand. family is valued as the foundation of our lives in most african cultures. as such, of course you would want your family involved in an important part of your life, and, as such, they of course will want to be there for you, however the ceremony goes down.
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"Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere" - Amiri Baraka