135. "There's just so much here, I'm not sure where to begin." In response to In response to 0
But I'm bored so I'll dig in.
>1. Do we REALLY need a man, if we are financially stable, >have our own homes, already have children(or don't want any), >and I guess know how to go to Rite Aid for batteries when need >be? LOL!
That's highly subjective. Personally, I want a family, and for that to happen, yes, I need a husband. No rush. No pressure. Just how *I* want things to shake out, ultimately.
>2. Polygamy: should we stop "fakin' the funk", w/ all these >babydaddies, and sleepin' around w/ other people's husbands, >etc., and just say 'F*** it, we just need to go on and become >a polygamous society w/in a monagamous society-at-large'? & if >we let Brothahs do this, do you think they could handle >it(financially, emotionally & Spiritually w/o letting that Ego >run amuck)?
I can't even address the baby momma/daddy issue here b/c it always gets mein trouble. I will say this, though -- we need to make better choices. I'll leave it at that.
>3. MRS vs MS degree: is it a "worthy sacrifice" to focus on >obtaining education, career, getting your business started(or >whatever the case may be), BEFORE pursuing marriage(or >otherwise committed relationship), or possibly, at the expense >of?
There's something to this. I think the pendulum needs to swing back to the middle here. That is to say, it wasn't so long ago that it was unfathomable for a woman to have career, education, home, etc... let alone doing it *before* having a husband. But the women's movement came along and showed women (and to some extent society at large) that is perfectly acceptable for women to have, want, and strive for more. Which was the point, obviously, but where it gets hairy is that now, many of *our* moms were single moms who were never taught how to operate within a family unit. So essentially, we've gone from one extreme to the next. There is much less emphasis on raising families and being mothers, to the point where many women simply don't know how to *be* wives or mothers. I think we need to find the happy medium here.
Simply, we're not taught how to do both. We need that.
>4. OTHERS: IF it's really true that there is a shortage of >marriagable Brothahs statistically(due to the down-low<the >estimates are as high as 80% of African-American men engage in >this behavior, btw>, outright homosexuality, eternal >bachelorhood, into white women, in jail, on drugs, >blah-zay,blah-zay, blah-zay, you know the drill...), then >should we look to other types/races/ethnicities of men? If >not, then what is the solution?
I don't have the stomach to address this tomfoolery but I urge you, sis, please please PLEASE cease fanning the DL flames in our community. 80%?!?!?! HOT. GARBAGE. Our men deserve better.
>5. I worked in Kenya in '02, where it is believed that a >female does not become a woman until she gives birth. Agreed, >or disagreed? >
Sorry... can't buy that one. I'm no less a woman because I haven't (or ultimately choose not to) have birth. Having children does not define me or my womanhood.