Bartek:

yo, im travelling notes/
cats coughin like they pulling on bottletokes, that's BarTek in capitols/
my monumental stance is ample/
in size and the pen-is, mightier/
i'm walking, triga-nometry, cause i tek-nically, am on point like 3d origami tree's/
it's a chess game, i'm sittin on the first lane/
yo, check me, it's a Pawn Gnome/
Parental Guidance y'all, this cat, spittin raps for children's ears wit an explanation/
come on, we ain't searching for a lesson, from mommie and daddy, either you battlin/
or baby sittin Pee Gee's, or BEE GEE's in ya 8 track player, it's over, okayplayer?/
right, i make those, sentences bend those, punches, fit for a king, but caught in pg's hunches/
it's Peasent Gnome, shorter than the Hunchback of Notre Dame/
welcome to your induction, a classroom full of taller orcs than you hobbling/
imma push you around, for a lil bit, this diss has gone past your functions/
i program lunches, and serve hot dishes, while you still scratch n'sniff those titties/
mmm, yumm, another one, by the one, that comin for the crown/
*turns to crowd/
pipe down a minute, im tryinna swat a fly/
mental game, was too easy dunn, had you calling buy, before we met, while i/
have a news report, you dropped a verse and still hit way too short/
you in the range, but your far-sighted like your battle plan/
don't you understand?/
you a tank/
and im bazooka joe pointed at ya barrel/
filling your gums while i burst your babble/
im giving daps, but really, ya jus being silly thinkin you could step to tek/
ain't even said i'd kill you once, or called you a fag, nah, i don't do it like that/
this the battle of wits, so maybe if you re-buttle, you'll re-settle, the re-cently subtle/
right, i'm trouble and you in my cyclone/
you want me uncle? shit, i pick you off my shoes like shit i stepped on/
in the grass first and then the gravel, gotta wipe ya away like settled/
brow swet, toss it to the pavement, and say fid'duck that/
ayo, them kids that be squakin, don't bother votin, cause this too grown for you token's/
you jus a flowthrough, imma row to, the end of the waterfall, and piss in pg's cornflakes/
eat them, dork, it's breakfast and you just woke up/
a 3rd verse, more on point, than the last round/
an editorial/
i was broadcastin from a universe beyond your factual/
i never let go, got this sucka on a chain, travellin like a train/
yo/
uh huh, you neva thought i'd leave my vowel out/
this verse, read it twice, cause, a 22. is a time out/
a lil bait for the ignorant/
22 is my yearly mind cloud, rainin another dawn upon the lime light/
i see ya comin for my crown but/
wish it was so doggie dog/
we battlin like ketchup vs. mustard/
you're the second pick that flows like custard/


PG:

call this your buy Bartek you lonely asswiper with empty pockets only pass the piper
what the heck is a Bartek?
inedible?
incredible?
animal vegetable or mineral?
Just minimal with pen n all ya letter keys on bended knees for me to drop this
watch this
cocked fist
ya shock poster mock pollster even gd knows you got naught in ya holster of verbs
take shots to bolster ya nerves slim pickings like you is strictly for the nerds
I feed ya to the birds
I drop seeds not words
haven't ya heard
PG don't battle me can't rattle me
Ya dick will fly as I liquefy and serve you with a ladle B
to the needy
Te to the Ha to the Te
laughing my way to Tahiti
Bartek got too greedy so I snatched his stash now he ticked off like ash
eating his own snake oil shit and licking his ass
his quickening has passed
and I'm back in the thick again at last
well as thick as it gets ya cats is all out classed
it's like the govenator going postal on the kindergarten class
Tek call god and beg her to let most of y'all in the garden fast
it's like I'm the sun and I'm about to pass gas
oh what a blast
can you suckers here me laugh
it's fucking corny but I still stand above you like a Giraffe
but I love ya like a good employer loves his staff
I'll only embezzle half
here's the tip Diane Sawyer Yukon
You on snatch yours cause the feeling might fizzle fast
and there's Tek with a twizzler in the bath
Mr. Gummo
he ain't that dumb though
but he can barely hum so
how he gonna rhyme?
he like faulty smurf breaking down all the time
he fall to the turf cause I'm shaking ground all the time
In every mall on this earth they got one or more of his kind
they ain't hard to find
but you can discard them like an orange rind
get to the Pulp n Gorge ya mind
ayo I'm out for now but I want y'all to know I've had a gorgeous time
next cat better put more than porridge on the line
I'm tired of cats laying down to explore the pine
Phonetic Grappling I came here to get mine
bent Tek like a sapling my name round here is strychnine
Now I demonstrate what my venom state
My insidious vernacular of hideous atrocity spectacular brought hot with velocity...impact incurred now Tek just sauce to me
like all cats after me he met with catastrophe my text mastery while Teks just atrophy
into inconsiderable shriveled drivel of pitiful syllables
for the sheer win's sake no less my mere intake of breath still kill em all
phffffff
phffffffff
phffffffffff
aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

"There is nothing more poetic, but depressing than a male writer" -yours truly