I had a lot of years with the wind at my back. Strong support, a lot of freedom and no shortage of breaks in my favor. All the other shit I could handle and chalk up to some luck evening out. But my dad was a tough one to take and it was just a bang-bang thing. I helped him into the ambulance and then I never saw him alive again. It's also so final and non-negotiable, really a strange and helpless feeling.