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| Forum name | Freestyle Board |
| Topic subject | walking with three shadows (1) |
| Topic URL | http://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=7&topic_id=72598 |
72598, walking with three shadows (1) Posted by Morehouse, Fri Mar-07-08 11:33 PM
what comes and goes to and fro but the sun and moon meeting to speak in the vast language of wind heard from cloud to concrete
where i stand, march, wade through the dreams of others, deferred in silence by the purgatory of the third rail
together, we trudge into the day mundane crossings of eyes routine circumstance so banal that we often forget to breathe
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72657, Is This ... Posted by PhotoSynthesis, Mon Mar-10-08 11:31 PM
Part I -- with two more parts to follow?
*Just Wondering*
I like what I've read so far ... Looking for more -- :D
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72712, i appreciate the title Posted by mindful, Thu Mar-13-08 06:04 PM
and this stanza:
together, we trudge into the day mundane crossings of eyes routine circumstance so banal that we often forget to breathe
good work, man... Peace~
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the search for peace is a long and tedious journey. be prepared.
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72724, RE: walking with three shadows (1) Posted by Amira Muse, Thu Mar-13-08 10:45 PM
I like the line break of line one of stanza two. It's a simple statement, but so directive. Couple that with the opening of stanza three and you've done an excellent job of pulling readers in without forcing your hand or theirs.
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