last thursday your face met
mine with those big eyes
and i could only remember
the laugh lines near your lips.
you appeared with your hands
folded across your chest begging
for me to label you and i something
more than we are.
one hundred years could pass
and i'd still gripe about the way
you left the toilet seat
up, or stepped out of your boxers
and kept them where they landed, or
how you'd eat two meals at one
sitting and leave the dishes
to marinate in various sauces mixed
with soapy water.

your sister pulled me to the
side in the store two months
ago. she spoke highly of "this new
girl" you're dating, but says,
"she doesn't have your heart,
tremaine. she just doesn't."
with my mouth agape i stood
in the midst of reunions
and memories that hurried
through my mind.
i smiled at her kindness knowing
full well we do not choose who
our siblings date and asked her
"is he happy?" and as the
sun shifted to embrace the
clouds above us, she whispered,
"he appears to be."

after years of shedding
pieces of you, i find it
hard to form a future with
another someone. history cannot
be erased, but i've watched
my mind push every suitor away
without giving my heart a single
chance to observe. i decline
living with your love as a leech
hungrily sucking the life out
of my every limb.
i want my old heart back,
it tires of being
impotent.

©Tremaine L. Loadholt

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Pinwheels and HulaHoops|the book
http://www.lulu.com/content/132318
http://msmind.blogspot.com|the life


Simple. l'Ame. la Soeur