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Forum nameFreestyle Board
Topic subjectgood fairies
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=7&topic_id=59505
59505, good fairies
Posted by ms mimi diva, Fri Aug-18-06 03:00 PM
Who killed little Miss America?
the flaxen haired
tawny curled beauty
that so many secretly adored?
Was it an
adulterous
slight
of hand
cutting through the night
or was
it the sight of her
an angel
freeze

framed

in her family photo?

innocence and knowledge
dancing on her forehead
like sizzling beads of sweat?

who will dance for us now
who will be the coveted dream
that no one has
but we all long for
like the ache to the tooth
before the good fairies come?
59512, yeh Akeela said it best...
Posted by ASIEM, Fri Aug-18-06 10:37 PM
"prestidigitation" and "Barby" was no more as she was before

"keep pennin till the earth birth's your rightful seed then nurture it wit more ink..."
ASIEM
"Kuun fiyah Kuun" Quran
(Be and it is)
" A writer takes his pen to write the words again that all in love is fair" Stevie Wonder
62205, I Dunno About The Subject Title ...
Posted by PhotoSynthesis, Thu Nov-30-06 12:07 AM
But I like the concept and flow of this -- Yuuuup*

S'specially right here:

>innocence and knowledge
>dancing on her forehead
>like sizzling beads of sweat?

>who will dance for us now
>who will be the coveted dream
>that no one has
>but we all long for
>like the ache to the tooth
>before the good fairies come?

I mean -- I see where the fairies title comes from -- But I don't tie it in to the flow until the very end, nahmean?

Don't pay me no mind tho -- I need to take my butt to sleep! -- ;)




62218, RE: I Dunno About The Subject Title ...
Posted by ms mimi diva, Thu Nov-30-06 12:49 PM
Thanks, Photo. I see what you mean. I'm not wedded to the title, either. It says something, but not really enough. I was considering something along the lines of "little mrs. america and the great toothache", but decided it would be cliche. This should read like a dark fairy tale. That's really what the Ramsey case is all about.

I'll put some more thought into it. Maybe another name will come up.
62219, :::DARK FAIRIES' TALE:::
Posted by PhotoSynthesis, Thu Nov-30-06 12:55 PM
^That^ would've done it for me! -- *I Think*

Or something with a light but sinister~twisted~ironic take on it, nahmean?

But like I said -- I see where it tied in at the end -- I just found myself looking for the good fairies and there weren't any! -- :(

Nice work nevertheless ...