63508, RE: Yesayah/Gmsk. Posted by soulchild, Wed Jan-31-07 06:03 AM
I'm with your sentiment. however, to me, the delivery sounds more like a speech or a pep talk, or something other than a poem. maybe you were going for that. maybe not. either way, i just suggest that you play around with it. throw in some imagery, sound, metaphors, similes, etc. to engage readers.
keep at it.
soul.
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