Unborn

I
the wannabe player unable to play the game too well
drifting from here and fro like an unanchored boat
You
club hopper show stopper
the spotlight shined on you during your entrance
somehow we matched up and discarded our former shells
Reached that happy medium between
Staying individuals yet team players
Days weeks months
We grew closer
Had disagreements
Went away
Sent hate mails
Sent apologies
Offered dinners
Held hands
Shared kissing laughter
Kept each other’s bed occupied
We were now team players
Who didn’t want to be individuals anymore

A missed period made our sentence complete
our union created something extraordinary
I will admit
I wasn't as happy as I lead on to be
not because I didn't want to be a father
but more because my fatherhood fears
crept up sitting on my shoulder
whispering sweet intoxicating doubts
the more I spoke to you
the more I shrugged off the suggestions
the more I spent around you
the less I thought about me;
more about us three
I never saw your smile so wide
Especially when my hands rubbed
On your three month growth

Pain…
Sharp pain
Something was odd
Images raced though your mind

Indigestion?
Labor?
No…
God, don’t let it be the baby
Please don’t let it be the baby…
but the creator decided that this masterpiece wasn't perfect enough for display
so s/he stilled its heartbeat
But did it have to hurt you so bad
your tears mixed in with the crimson pool
you knelt in
your pleas eerie arias
playing in an empty washroom
if I could I would transfer the pain
over to me; to be your yoke
in this time of burden

you knew
in your heart you always knew
but you still cried out to see
what should have been
but you knew our creation
was no more

We named him Jah for to Jah he returned
our Isaac and Moses for the next seeds to flourish
he would have been five last week
asking us to take him to chuck e cheese
or get him that spongebob talking doll
knowing it was already in the closet
he would have cheated in Uno
and tugged on your overcoat
asking you to give him a zerbert

so to Jah we honor you as well as other
unfinished masterpieces
with these words we will never forget you
we love you
happy birthday...



We are all dreamers...

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