Or did you receive an introduction via Eyes On the Prize, Roots etc or did you receive a live-action crash course via public encounter? How open are you with your children about racism?

I finally watched a vid thats been circulating on Tiktok/Insta where a 55-60 yr old woman talks about her experience as a child and the trauma it brought. She says her mother gave her words of encouragement however she still carried low self-esteem and just couldnt fathom why white people were so mean and evil. It was sad, and I thought about my first encounter w/racism and how unprepared I was in not only dealing with it but also recognizing it. I would like to think Ive prepared my sons much better.

What’s your take?

There were the occasional comments I heard from family about how white people are, how they do racist things, but never a legit talking to or education like I should've had. One of my brothers married a white woman and my mom had a big convo with him, asking why he couldn't just find a nice black woman. But she'd never taught us the importance of building at black family, so I was young and confused why she was even asking that (at the time). I was taught more what Jesus say and all that. Grew with this advice to love all people until I realized white people don't see me as human. That was a really traumatic period, because I'd had white friends and just saw them as people. Looking back and realizing that was never really reciprocal was hard, not to mention the incident that finally truly woke me up. But I won't go on and on about that.

This is why I'm VERY selective about who I have children with. I was on the verge recently, but our ideas of how to educate our children, what it means to be Black, etc were just too different, and I will NOT raise unaware children. Absolutely not.

Spirit felt on that last line.

My mom told me but she still put me in negative environments like catholic school and when the shit hit the fan with a number of racist and abusive teachers, she really didnt know how to handle it. In short, I was physically attacked by my 3rd grade teacher. My mom shouldve had the bitch arrested and got a lawyer, but she took the “highroad”. I think after that experience she stopped intergrating me into places&spaces. I’ve done the same as far as schools go and a little further by sitting in at least once on classes up to freshman year, particularly if my kids or the teacher notified me of a problem.

I gave them both the black girls/women first talk as well as the understanding on colorism within our community. My oldest has dated a white and latina girl before but most are Black/Pan-African and his current gf is Black and they shacking(lol). I think he gets where Im coming from but like any young person, he’s exploring.
Younger son isnt dating yet but he’s more aware of racism and is very leery of white people.

I was looking at candy but didn’t have enough for what I really wanted.. white dude behind the counter (teenager) gave me the candy bar. I went home and told my dad thinking he eiuld be like “that’s cool” and my parents were like “dont you EVER do that again”

that was the first time I got a talk about race.

but it still didn’t prepare me for white teachers in elementary school. Those motherfuckers are racist POS. Things like getting in trouble for doing the same thing white kids were foing but being the only one gets punished.

Although our parents and grandparents have gone through the US education system, I dont think many of us realize that its that particular system thats the root introduction into racism through a child’s eyes. Its the first place where you learn to feel inferior.

Recently visited a h.s that had always been a hood school, Black students and 85-90% Black teachers. The school was rebuilt and still holds a majority of Black students with some Latino students, but now the teaching staff looks 60% white. The 40% Black teachers are a mix of main teachers and subs. I doubt theres some super shortage of Black teachers, it definitely feels like its by design but the most infuriating part is that the public school network is still majority Black and Latino administratively. We’re allowing it.

anytime a student had an issue with the school they called my mom. She didn’t play and didn’t let white folk off the hook.

She had no problem calling shit out.

She was even on the school board for a few years.

I was talking to my older sisters and aunts and they all had stories of teachers doing racist shit that they didn’t even realize until years later. My aunt said they kept the Black kids inside at recess and let them do whatever they wanted. Didn’t dawn on her they were being segregated at recess. She ran up on the teacher years later after she graduated and let him know she would never be that type of teacher.

I cursed out my 3rd grade teacher and I’m still looking for my basketball coach, lol.. bastard faked like he was separated from his wife so he could have his midget son play basketball at our school. The shit these white folks at schools is incredible.

I almost hate to say it but Im glad I never ran across my 3rd grade teacher cause I would be in jail for poppin her spine.

kid's parents were loaded. we're in a big cul de sac in a house FULL of white kids smoking weed, doing coke, drinking etc. me and my 2 guys, the only black people there fell back and stood in the street, talking to some other white kids who were hesitant about going in at all. police rolls up and immediately start harassing me and my dudes talking about there's been complaints, pretty much ignoring all the debauchery going on in the background. one of my dudes (white kid) had a big brother home from college who came to our rescue and basically lit into the police for messing with us. that was my first experience with learning that there are 2 justice systems in the US. me and my guys left around 11 but the word around school was the party lasted til about 3:30 that morning. so much for the complaints huh.





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cause my grandma was pure 100% all white people are evil. idk if i ever heard her say a kind word about more than 5 white people in my life.

my parents were more "yeah some of em are but some of em are solid too"

Did that prepare you for your first encounter with racism (blatant/hidden)?

pretty sure i told this story on here before.

it was the time we all discovered punching each other in the nuts as humor/horseplay. and this one white kid that participated in it, told a teacher on me and a couple other black kids and they got the SRO to come threaten that he was going to take us to jail for assault if we kept it up. and the other kids were crying and carrying on and i'm like "bet i can't wait to tell my mom about this cause yall are in for it"

long story short, the white kid ended up having to admit he was in on it too. the SRO got reassigned to desk duty or some shit. and we got a written apology from the principal and the school board. im pretty sure she still has it collected somewhere like a trophy

ive never really had issues maneuvering or identifying racism because my grandma always told me white people were the devil. i never really had a chance to have childhood innocence on that front

and my parents socialized me around white people and activities at an early age so i wouldn't have a limited social perspective. as long as i can remember i've been familiar w/ the ways white people move

so as i got older, things like a viet kid yelling nigger at me over and over because i did his team up in a soccer game didnt phase me nearly as much as it did my teammates (black, white and hispanic) because it wasn't a shock to me that it could happen.

The situation with the SRO brings to mind the Central Park 5.

I don't think my mom even brought of racism a way that would've been informative. shit has been on the job training, especially as a teen.

one of my boys were really into white girls. I'd never really dealt with them before. just not my thing. he set up a double date with me, him, and two white chicks.

I was hella uncomfortable while riding along. don't remember much of it now, but clearly recall the one in the back seat with me smiling real big and saying I got me a nigger! she was proud af.

I gave her a death stare and she apologized, but I was done. I couldn't punch her in the face like my 16 yr old self wanted to because I knew that would make it worse. my buddy was still trying to get some ass, laffing and shit.

I've talked to both of mine about it. not in a sit down, here's a whole thing kind of way, but more like random convos at the table or when driving.

my daughter is 19 and seems to be pretty aware of things. however, she's thinking about transferring to UGA. I warned her about willfully placing herself in situations where shit could go sour because she's black.

my son went to a more mixed middle school last year. he became more aware when a YT kid would go on about his love of country, god, and guns. told him to watch that one cuz none of that says he likes black kids.

So what became of your boy who thought all that shit was funny?

we've been out of touch as adults. I called him recently thought. he didn't sound good. has a thyroid issue.

he's still talking like he's 16. talking about pulling chicks, hanging out, and fighting. he's also divorced and grandpa. hasn't grown up.

not sure he messed with white chicks afterwards, but I knew I wasn't.

I grew up outside of Pittsburgh which is the birthplace of interracial dating.

I was messing with one back in HS and when prom came around she was like “so when are you going to ask me to prom” and I responded “aint no fucking way I’m taking prom photos with a white girl.. I got a momma and sisters”

She lost it. OMG, I been fighting my mom and her boyfriend and this is how you do me? You guys are just as bad as my mom”

me: “yup.. ikr? aint that some shit? Not gon be able to do it!!!”


had a friend or 2 who kept dipping after HS and these dudes been in and out of jail over these broads. I read a small town paper of my homie getting arrested that had to be written by someone we know.

“when police arrived, Jon was sitting on the curb drunk and told the cops “go ahead and arrest me now, yall always believe the white chick anyways”

My parents were activist lawyer types, my dad was a civil rights lawyer. It was a lot of Martin & Malcolm, Muhammad Ali, Richard Pryor, Huey Newton, Last Poets as a kid. Black Liberation Theology though no one called it that. As I got older it was Isis Papers, Nile Valley Contributions to Civilization. My dad even got heavy into Public Enemy as an older man.

We watched Eyes on the Prize in my majority black elementary school. I grew up in a majority black county in VA with majority black teachers so I don't have a lot of the racist school incidents people are sharing here. Well not in way that would make me feel powerless.

For example, I did have a 5th grade teacher who starting talking about how slavery couldn't have been that bad because "if you had a horse who you used for work , you wouldn't beat that horse unnecessarily. you would have to take care of it".

I came home and told my parents about that convo. My dad called the superintendent of schools that night (who was black), and the teacher apologized to the whole class the next day.

I remember this pwt white kid called someone the n word once and he got his ass whupped.

I was talking to my uncle last night who grew up in segregated baton rogue and one of the things he talked about was all the folks he looked up to were black. The doctors, lawyers, teachers, home builders. His parents were able to shield him away from segregated fountains and he grew up in a very black world and didn't encounter much blatant racism. I kinda grew up like that and really didn't inherent ideas that black people were supposed to be inferior or thought of as less than.

That's how I am trying to raise my kids even though there environment is totally different.



**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

>...he grew up in a very black
>world and didn't encounter much blatant racism. I kinda grew
>up like that and really didn't inherent ideas that black
>people were supposed to be inferior or thought of as less
>than.

Since nearly everyone was black, race wasn't a big factor in how I perceived myself. I was free to be whatever I wanted without race being attached to it. The high-achieving smart kids in my school weren't smart for black kids," they were just smart.

You were definitely blessed.

I’m working on my youngest to be in the mindset to attend/graduate an hbcu and bypass the white majority institutions.

I grew up in a neighborhood that was around 50/50 black/white. So there would often be situations where I'd be hanging with friends and they'd explain to me that what I can get in trouble for vs. the white kids could be very different. I remember when I was maybe in first grade, and in our sub they were building new houses. Me and a couple of my white friends were checking out the construction sites, and my dad saw us. He schooled me on the danger of walking through a construction site, but also the impact of "trespassing" while being a Black kid.

Also little things like I remember bringing a Transformer toy home that one of my friends let me borrow, and I got schooled to NEVER bring something home that wasn't mine, whether given to me or not, because I could get accused of stealing.

As I got older, it's funny that you mention Eyes on the Prize and Roots because I JUST mentioned that to a friend of mine. I'm reading Michael Harriot's book Black AF History (HIGHLY RECOMMENDED - and the audio book is currently free on Spotify) and I'm realizing how much I never learned when I was young. As a kid my only education on our history was from Roots, Eyes on the Prize, and Black history programs at my church which were very much surface level.

I didn't fully get racism - with an understanding of institutional racism and micro aggressions - until college. I remember the summer before college, I was working a retail job. I mentioned to a white coworker that I was about to be a freshman at Michigan. That kid (who was going to community college) told me "yeah, you only got in there because you're Black." I was livid. Told my parents about it that night, and I told them that I didn't agree with Affirmative Action because I was so offended that someone would say that. I had a 3.98 GPA and a 32 ACT score - I deserved to get into Michigan regardless of being Black!!!. My parents were taken back by me saying that and checked the MESS out of me. Then I could see on their faces that they realized that they'd never really talked to me about racism. They straight up schooled me that evening, and got me all the way together. They were transparent in sharing their experiences from the 50's and 60's, all the way through that present time in the 90's with the racism they saw in their careers as a firefighter and a teacher. They explained the reasons WHY they'd always been so strict with me.

After that evening I realized I had much to learn, because before that I thought "racism" was the blatant stuff like lynchings and police forces stopping Black kids from going to school, and I didn't notice the more subtle every day racism. The combination of that conversation with my parents with me moving out and going to college that fall, living on my own and starting to see things myself, is what made me really start to learn it.

I remember having a quiz at our after school program at the community center on Black inventors. We got all those questions wrong because Carver and the peanut.

We were pissed. Why hadn’t we learned about any of these amazing people in school?!

I also remember 7th grade riding back from a basketball game and we were talking Black history and my homie said “they talk about MLK but never talk about Malcolm X.

Who???

Went to the library and started taking out books.

Also have to give a shout out to hip hop. BDP, PE brought up names that made me search for knowledge.

YOU.MUST.LEARN!!!

>I'm reading Michael Harriot's book Black AF History (HIGHLY
>RECOMMENDED - and the audio book is currently free on Spotify)
>and I'm realizing how much I never learned when I was young.
>As a kid my only education on our history was from Roots, Eyes
>on the Prize, and Black history programs at my church which
>were very much surface level.

Thank you for mentioning this book. Got a copy from the local library late last week. I'm about a quarter of the way through and while the majority of the jokes he makes in the footnotes don't always land, I do like how relatively easy dude's writing style is. The chapters so far don't get too boring or overwhelming to read.

Not just my parents, but my aunts, uncles, camp counselors and scout leader. They certainly didn't sugarcoat anything. Stories about the racist cops, Frank Rizzo, racist people at their jobs, the racist army, racist people in northeast Philly, the racist justice/jail system, racist Reagan & the government, the racist USA, etc.

The stories from their past were crazy too. Scout leader said when he was a kid in Philly, the cops once drove down the street real slow, and the cop in the passenger seat leaned out the window and pointed a shotgun at them. Held aim on them for a while, then drove off laughing.

Philly was quite segregated growing up, so a lot of stuff they taught me was right in front of my face. Almost everyone I interacted with daily was Black. Occasionally, when I'd be in a non-Black environment and people were treating me coldly or like shit, the reason was pretty obvious.

When I went off to college in '94 I had my oldest aunt warn me to stay away from the white girls. Wasn't hate, she was concerned for my safety.

It’s funny cause I remember my mom making mention about Reagan, white folks and politics as early as kindergarten too.

My mom did. My dad didn't til I was older, and he's pretty racist. So thank god my mom got to me first.

>My mom did.

jk.

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

My mom was a 60s hippie kid who really latched on to Civil Rights, and was adamant about basic human rights and things of that nature. I can't really remember specifics of the conversations she had with me, but I know her early lessons to me were along the lines of, we're all human, you and I are insanely lucky to have been born here, to be white, some people were born in disadvantageous situations that we can never fully understand, and thru no fault of their own, have empathy and always stand up for the underdog (for lack of a better term). That sort of thing.

I vaguely remember her talking about police harassment of Black people around the time of the Rodney King beating, but again I don't really remember specifics. I just know that that's where I'd first heard about police brutality.

One specific anecdote I *do* remember was when I was about 11 or 12, and she pointed out to me that in the show "Friends" (which I never liked to begin with) they live in New York City and there's not a single Black person in that show. Like not even an extra. That was a "pay attention to this sort of thing" moment that she pointed out to me. Representation, even if she didn't use that word.

I live in a liberal college town where there are a lot of white progressives and see some interesting levels of awareness. The fact that you remember that much of what your mom taught you shows some strong impact and her sincerity.

I'm adopted as well, so the fact that I ended up being adopted and raised by someone like her, who gave me such important perspective(s) and building blocks, especially that early in life (she died of cancer when I was 16, and for example the anecdote I told you about the Rodney King stuff happened when I was I think 8yo) is something I don't take for granted either, for a million reasons.

Like the folks show here at some point black people/kids are going to have to talk about race but it is remarkable how in this country its relatively easy for white people to never have to talk about race which is why so many find it so difficult or default to "what's the big deal?"



**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

>Like the folks show here at some point black people/kids are
>going to have to talk about race but it is remarkable how in
>this country its relatively easy for white people to never
>have to talk about race which is why so many find it so
>difficult or default to "what's the big deal?"

Definitely. These past few years have really highlighted this for me. I'd long assumed that since I grew up in the Boston area among mostly "liberals," that my situation was typical, and that most of my friends' parents would have had similar discussions with them.

Learned the hard way that that is *definitely* not the case and that I was one of the very, very, very few. Which has made for some very frank and very hard discussions with some close friends. Harder for them than me; the only hard part for me was realizing how ignorant (willfully or otherwise) so many of my friends have always been, without my realizing it. And that's saying something, cuz I'm pretty ignorant in the bigger picture, because of the bubble I grew up in, even having had those types of conversations at an early age.

Im curious as to how your parents came together with such vastly different perspectives on race.

Also, this post is directed at those who are Black. Although your experience is unique, it comes off as a push into a conversation that you recognize but have not at all experienced.

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

by the way he described moms

the hippy mom and racist dad def has a “goils were goils and men were mennnn” vibe

and it's not just Brew's folks - I have this question in general. it kinda fascinates me, think that there is obvious answers, but believing that it has to be "deeper", right?

it goes into relationships with family, as a whole.

how complicated are those convos and moments of co-existence - or - how "hard" is it to ignore certain things?

iono.

I grew up in North Philly and went to an all black Public School.

When I was bussed out to Richmond, I encountered racism face to face. I was called; porch monkey, jungle bunny, tar baby and the first time I remember being called the N word.

That's when I was given "The Talk".

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

Almost everyone on my bus had tested out of their neighborhood school's into Magnet or Advanced Learning Programs.

Those neighborhoods weren't ready for all those black and brown faces.

Port Richmond in the 80s/90s might've been worse than VA with the racism.

One of those neighborhoods that I never set foot in until ~10 or so years ago, and I still feel uncomfortable being there. Fishtown & parts of South Philly too.

It was definitely crazy racist in the 80's and 90's. Those Caucaparents were none too pleased with the blacks coming into their neighborhood.

learned really early on that children learn racism from their parents
or whatever environment they are in. it's pretty sick.

went to san diego recently and was taken aback at how racist some of
those people are and what they teach their kids, and they were not
white. asians, hispanics, etc. can be racist as f*ck over there.

and they say things like “them.. a certain group of people”

and usually its Asians.

Just said they are shitty af in large groups on those ships.

Based partly in that. Charter on the northwest side of chicago, predominantly latino. Grades k-5th were nice, miss a lot of those babies, but a number of the older students were racist af and punk af too. The principal didnt make it much better being a latino make that upheld white women. When I put in my resignation 3 weeks after orientation he was so worried and kept asking ‘was there anything done here for you to want to leave’.

On another note I ended up teaching just 20blks away, at a public school (much more $) where the kids had a similar ration yet did not display racist traits, but a number of them were bad af. Lol. The principal had his hair cut in a Mayan style while suited up everyday for work. His own child attended the school as well. I say all that to say I believe he set a tone there were racism was not tolerated. On the other hand there were some staff that tried not to reveal their true selves but it would seep through.

As for Asians, as anytime they are in groups or w/white friends they go apeshit racist. Its the most Igorish, bootlickenish, ‘did I do good master’ shit to ever see. They’ll also step on each other and lower themselves for white approval. It’s sad af.

then she said like 8 of them showed up from across the street and tried to intimidate her.

She knows a little spanish so she heard one of them tell the driver “don’t give that bitch your insurance info”

and yes, most groups will go above and beyond for white approval.

I was friends with the popular white kid who moved to our town. He was rich AF and really good in sports so we were competitive at recess.

We beat his team in football and I was talking mad shit in line on the way in because its what we always did but this was the first time I really spanked his squad.

He hit me with a NIGGER that caught me off guard

He was big af but I damn sure tried to beat his ass. He got the lecture and we shook hands but that shit threw me off.

I had heard the word because I watched The Jeffersons, Sanford and Son and knew about racism but to hear it directed at me in front of the class?

Not to mention from someone you considered a friend.

obviously

kept my guard up at all times after that shit.

The West Side of I-35 was white, the East Side was Black, south of the city was Mexican and white and north of the city was transplants of all races.
We apartment hopped from the ages of 4 to 8 and then from 8 to 12 we had a house in the Northern suburbs
From 5-12 I participated in all of my youth activities on the East side. Like a reverse busing.
I would go to school in these racist ass environments, often time the only Black kid in the room, definitely in my GT and honors classes
Take the bus home, wait for my dad to come pick me up, he'd drive me to the East side and I'd play basketball or football there.
In all of my years there, there was little intermingling between demographics. Even the North side Black folks never made their way to the East side.
I didn't have to have a talk about racism. I lived it.

Don't you think all the other black people here lived it as well?


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

I didn’t get invited to birthday parties or sleep overs or really have any interactions outside of school hours
And during school hours I had to fight … a lot

I wish I could tell you that I got important life lessons from my parents but thats not the case
They were high schoolers from the projects that had me in highschool
I learned to read and write when I was 2 and they got me into advanced schooling by the third grade and that was the last age they were able to help with school
They went to bat for me behind the scenes to ensure that I got treated equally but they never brought that home
I never got the be twice as good talk
I never got the dont let your white friends get you in trouble talk
I never got the watch out for cops talk
The closest I came to a talk was my dad taking me to see Menace and Sugar Hill in theater as a kid and on the rides home him telling me that the difference between our life and that life was doing whatever it takes to get out

I didnt get race talks.
I got work your way out of this shit talks.
I got responsibility and no excuses talks.
Nobody denigrated my community folks and said your cousins are like this because of xyz.
Nobody said the suburbs are better because of abc.

sorry my dude but I laugh at folks who tell me what they were doing at 2.

You were shitting and eating my dude.

It’s whatever though. The point of that wasnt to point out how book smart I was or am.
Shit didnt prepare me for the institutions it gave me access to.
The question was did our parents talk to us about racism. My answer no, they immersed me in racist structures that they didn’t understand and said swim.

like, nah my nigga your life is what i said it was because im too dense to comprehend it

yet another post turned into The Legsdiamond Show

understanding perspectives NOT his own just isnt in his dna

https://www.fieldandstream.com/conservation/fatal-bear-attacks-2021/

2021 Has Been a Year of Brutal Bear Attacks—And the Worst May Be Yet to Come

Snip- It’s not just more bears. There are more people recreating in bear country than ever, and a lot of them don’t know how to recreate safely. Following restrictions on indoor activities and international travel during the COVID-19 Pandemic, people from all over the country have turned their attention to public land in the western U.S. The sudden increase in visitors has put local land managers in a bind.


People dont learn how to navigate bears and thats with land managers and park rangers. There are stores that’ll sell you all of the equipment to go and be outdoors but the actual knowledge of how to be outdoors safely is learned. I learned from my wife about digging holes, elevating food, and urinating away from campsites. I was in my mid thirties. To me racism is no different as a concept but deeply worse. Because nobody talks honestly about it and often the victims of it have internal mechanisms to downplay it. “My parents, elders, and ancestors survived worse so who am I to complain”. For me. My folks put me in bear country. My parents couldn’t teach me or talk to me about things they didnt know or couldnt conceptualize because their solution was to give me better opportunities. To them racism wasnt scoring me different on tests, alienating me on assignments and activities, weaponizing calling my parents or the principal for the slightest infraction … it was always on me, a kid, to have done the right thing or pick my punishment. Follow the school rules which were against what was being taught in the house and get punished at home or break the school rules and get punished at home for having the school call.

And since racism is so insidious and systematic and not always overt, folks just didnt know and still dont know what people are being subjected to. We see it every year with national news now between mock auctions, racist homework assignments, school beatings, Halloween costumes … etc. And thats just the overt stuff.

It definitely happens. There are parents that dont know how to address it to their kids or just figure the kid will figure it out. I know of parents that purposely refuse to inform their kids about racism. One mom said she didn’t want to ruin her kids childhood with it. I get it though, couldnt see having my kids just get attacked out the blue with no understanding.

>I get it though, couldnt see
>having my kids just get attacked out the blue with no
>understanding.

I lived a very "you figure it out" ass life. Race was one of the easier things to figure out. Most everyone notices being othered.
Much easier than when I was 10 and my dad needed the garbage disposal fixed and he just handed me the replacment part
Or being 9 and "taught" to iron clothes by having me iron his pants and instead of telling me what I was doing wrong or right him just handing me them and telling me to do it again.
My entire upbringing has been being the first person in the family to do something, having them ask ME questions about how I did it, and not being allowed to as a kid to ask "why" or "how"

What I've come to imagine my life is that if I was a first generation immigrant kid it would've looked very similar to what my experience was
And so I consider myself first generation poverty and think of everything in that vein.

with her son. he's also in a very white world.

I get having limited convos so it's not the entire focus of household discussions or turning it into hate speech towards others. however, because it's so pervasive, it shouldn't be completely off limits in the house.

Then there was an ah ha moment to be talked about
And what Im saying as a specific difference is that there was never an ah ha or oh that what that is moment for me
When I was 8 and the teacher had all of the 10 non Black kids in the grades be rats in the nut cracker play and I said to her I wasn't going to be a rat specifically because thats what she assigned to only the brown kids, nobody talked to me about that I knew
There was never a talk in my house about how I was going to be treated differently. There was immersion.
The friends, community, and team mates I was around never left East Austin
Youth and rec leagues were full on segregated
It wasnt until AAU tournaments became more prominent down here in the early 90s that folks from the community would get a chance to compete against other groups.
Hell we weren’t even pop warner football until like 95.

And I didn't have an a ha moment (but my folks did talk about it).

I'm just trying to figure out why you think your experience was so different from everyone else.

What's the smugness about?



>Then there was an ah ha moment to be talked about
>And what Im saying as a specific difference is that there was
>never an ah ha or oh that what that is moment for me
>When I was 8 and the teacher had all of the 10 non Black kids
>in the grades be rats in the nut cracker play and I said to
>her I wasn't going to be a rat specifically because thats what
>she assigned to only the brown kids, nobody talked to me about
>that I knew
>There was never a talk in my house about how I was going to be
>treated differently. There was immersion.
>The friends, community, and team mates I was around never left
>East Austin
>Youth and rec leagues were full on segregated
>It wasnt until AAU tournaments became more prominent down here
>in the early 90s that folks from the community would get a
>chance to compete against other groups.
>Hell we weren’t even pop warner football until like 95.


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

If anything I feel as if I lost something.
To grow as a kid without any innocence or illusions was a loss.
Im not better for it. No kid should have to be so hard.
At least sell me the dream that getting out of environment meant getting an opportunity to succeed
Instead I was the first generation of our entire family thrown into the pool of integration and told if I drowned it was because I didn’t work hard enough
Nobody in the house prepared me to be around whiteness because they didnt know what it meant in their own lives.
They knew the surface level, go on this side of town and x, end up in this part of the state ay night and y, date this kind of person and z. That surface level shit.
They’re just now as adult adults navigating shit Ive been dealing with as a kid. The systems.
No smugness. Not at all. I lost out.
Children shouldn’t have to navigate systems alone.

It's a response several people have given here.

But I think you wanted to be above all the responses here so you come with the "I didn't have to have a talk about racism. I lived it." like everyone else here didn't live it. Or there was nothing really to talk about because I guess you just intuit.

This whole, I wish I had the innocence of you ignorant mofos had but I was cursed with the brilliance to see through the illusions you all lived; it's a low key flex. It's so hard to be so aware and smart!!

COme on man. Give us a break. We get it. You are super smart.

But Imma leave you alone man. Even if you didn't have an a-ha moment, it sounds like you did have a complicated relationship with race growing up (like the rest of folks) and my point isn't really to belittle that experience.

I'm just coming at you for trying so hard to make your experience sound soo different and above it all then the everyone else.

Peace God.





>If anything I feel as if I lost something.
>To grow as a kid without any innocence or illusions was a
>loss.
>Im not better for it. No kid should have to be so hard.
>At least sell me the dream that getting out of environment
>meant getting an opportunity to succeed
>Instead I was the first generation of our entire family thrown
>into the pool of integration and told if I drowned it was
>because I didn’t work hard enough
>Nobody in the house prepared me to be around whiteness because
>they didnt know what it meant in their own lives.
>They knew the surface level, go on this side of town and x,
>end up in this part of the state ay night and y, date this
>kind of person and z. That surface level shit.
>They’re just now as adult adults navigating shit Ive been
>dealing with as a kid. The systems.
>No smugness. Not at all. I lost out.
>Children shouldn’t have to navigate systems alone.


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

I just skipped the flufferies. My parents didnt talk to me about race as a kid
We have the conversations we were supposed to have then, now and with respect to my children and family members that are leaving us.

My dad still feels strongly that since they worked their way out that anyone that didn’t achieve was 100% due to laziness, greed, and/or stupidity. That’s their relationship to race today in 2024. And I understand not wanting to be a victim. But my contention now and as a kid was that you can’t ignore systems, you can’t fight them head on, but dont give them your brain.

For my parents what I had been dealing with didn’t set in until I was in the eighth grade. We moved to a wealthy all white school in San Antonio and my teammates were “jokingly” writing KKK on the bus windows after a basketball game. When I got in a fight with them I got kicked off the team. When my mom came to pick me up the team and coach never denied the writing, it was chalked up as kids being kids.

I got to do all of highschool at a solidly lower middle class school with a large Black and brown population. We never talked about anything before. But that was when things changed.

I dont think Im so smart yada yada
You mentioned in other posts your family name has a legacy
Mine doesn't my great grandfather was a sharecropper he died when I was one, my grandmother cleaned houses most of my life, my dad had me in highschool and boom there I was. Being raised in a segregated city. The closest parallel I got would have been being raised in Richmond. But shit even they got a culture of HBCUs and only two hours for DC.

I can see the glasses and 2 tone smedium winter jacket

It does come off with gun powder for breakfast responses. However, one poster also said they were enriched in Blackness from birth and taught the ways of white folks so when they started throwing racist words, it rolled off his back cause he already knew them for who they were.
It kinda came off as ‘above it all’ but its his story, same w/ MEAT.

Thing of it is despite being informed or not, all of us as Black children were introduced to the ways of racist in some way, some sooner than others but still in during childhood (3- 15).

but folks be on some weird flexes on here

“I walked across the Birmingham bridge with Martin when I was in my daddy’s nutsack”

“I was in jail with Detroit Red” ass niggas.

He can't stand to hear black folk focusing on it

So how did he teach you to deal with it or get a premonition of when it was coming your way?

He's always been the "keep your eyes peeled" type, be cool and just remove yourself from situations that could be trouble. He's just always said that racists will always be out there no matter what and that I was the only person that could hold me back today.

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

grew up picking cotton in the 40s, only one in his family to graduate high school, went into the military ended up in Boston, then college, grad school and whatnot. He's had a Forrest Gump type of amazing rise lol. Like the people he knew along the way and all that.

but also had access to positive images of ourselves growing up (at least during the high school years). NOI used to provide security at the subway stations, so I never experienced the bad cop deal; there were Black classmates who were clearly more well off than some of the white kids in class. So, I didn't internalize any of the blatant racist stuff: I was a nerd and one of the HS teachers...wasn't even my teacher...grilled me with a buncha science questions during class, because he thought I was cheating (on some, no way you negroes can be this good at this stuff). To remember that white guy walking off in a huff makes me laugh even to this day.

I try to do the same for my kids, show them the best of us and avoid the the psychological warfare (aka, local news) as much as possible. I mean, during the lockdowns, we did nothing but watched Black travel vloggers who went to places like Nigeria, Kenya, etc...to have them see how it isn't just a buncha people in huts was a big confidence boost...and hopefully they realize they don't have to be confined to the borders of this country (everyone has their passport).

Watched with my youngest too and he is so excited to see the world. My oldest who checked in now and then is now ready to tell the US to kiss his *** and wants me to move with him. I dont mind and glad both my boys are beyond this country.

We're in a COMPLETELY different world right now...and what worked back then, doesn't work now.

We have NOT explicitly talked about racism with our children in the same way that we were "taught"....or should I say had fear instilled in us from a young age.

No matter how you slice it, despite all the talks about Black pride, perseverance, turning the other cheek, being strong, etc., etc., etc....we were raised with the self image of being victims and "less than". I don't want that for my children at all. We haven't figured out a way to teach them about racism, at this young age anyway, without them forming a false impression in their young minds of how that aligns with their identity.

We are doing our best to raise them human, citizens, individuals, Americans, children of Mr. & Mrs. FLUIDJ, grandchildren, part of a long history.....and wrapped up in all of that is of course their Blackness. We are teaching them that they need to move in this world focused more on the friends that they make, and the people that they DO like and that DO like them rather than the people that don't. The goal is for them to get it in their heads that those people don't matter and time shouldn't be wasted on them...white, Black, black, or anything...

“it was a white girl”

“look daddy, everyone here is Black right now”

which made me wonder if went too far with talking about race. Not sure yet, might judt be a phase but I don’t want her hyper focused on skin tone or the first thing she says to describe someone.

and my family approaches EVERYTHING from a race standpoint...
can't tell a story or have a random convo without race being brought into it...not even talking about serious stuff...just for instance...

I might say to my mom: "Ma, we're going up the street to grab some coffee from that new dessert shop, you want us to pick up anything for you?"

Her response: "No thank you. I went in there last week to get something but nothing looked good. This WHITE lady cashier was trying to get me to try samples but I just couldn't"....

It's like...what in the WORLD does that cashier's race have to do with this convo?? lol..

Same deal with all of my family back home...cousins, brother, aunts, uncles.... They legit look and move in the world hyper focused on black & white and boil almost everything down to that.

So when we visit, I'll look over at my kids and I can see them processing a mindset that we really don't want them to adapt.


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

not something I would say to a my kid but talking to adults or elders, hell yeah.. moms is saying the cashier was on some white people shit, lol.

my aunt was talking about her son’s kids all being mixed so she had to catch herself when warning them about dating those “Becky’s”

I’m old school so I read your moms convo and I’m wondering where she was wrong.. I know the kids can hear it but to me, that aint hyper focused, thats normal convo with a detailed description of the cashier.

of some of MY issues...

Since my kids are at that age where they absorb EVERYTHING and HEAR everything even when you think they aren't paying attention, I'm just super sensitive to it.

It's more of a problem for us when we're back home and I'll saying something like: "Let's go and check that new _____ out" or "Did y'all hear anything about ____?" Now _____ could be a store, a restaurant, a park, a person or anything...

Response will be something along the lines of: "Naw, that's where the white people be going" or "Do any Black folks be there?" or "Them Mexican's be doing that" ...

Meanwhile, my kids just want to try the new restaurant, or go to some store they saw a commercial for on TV (since the damn TV is ALWAYS on back home).......but the tone in which they hear that response is one of fear or restriction... so the connection they make is that they can't experience or do certain things back home in NC because they are Black. I don't want that for them. And most of the time, damn near ALL of the time, shit ain't that serious at all.

I recall a whole LOT of shit I missed out on growing up because family was so hung up on race and whether or not it was something Black folks would/should/could be doing.. We coulda,shoulda done ALLLLLLL that shit!.


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

or if the parents grew up in towns where race was a big deal

I definitely talked with my wife about my oldest focusing on race when describing people.

And I totally get it too.
When my parents came up, in NC, you HAD to be hyper aware of race and where you could, should, shouldn't go. EVERYTHING about their existence has been race based, and in many respects it still is....


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

This is a subject that gets me going.
But it goes like this:

Every generation, there is a tendency for some black people to declare, this is a new moment for black people, the past can only inform us but sooo much.

Amiri Baraka called in the Black Arts Movement in the 1960s.
Trey Ellis called it the New Black Aesthetic in 1989.
Pharrell Williams called in 'The New Black' in the 2010s.
(OJ lightweight said it when he said I am not Black, I'm OJ)

And I don't disagree that every time things were different, but I think its a mistake to cut off our past and not learn anything from it, and not seeing certain things that might not ever change.

In other words, I think it's kind of dangerous to not make black kids aware of our past, our journey and some of the obstacles that we as black people have always faced.

And I think it's possible to thread the needle of making them aware of the obstacles, without leaving them defeated before they even start or feel any sort of inferiority.

It's hard an complicated but its worth it so your kid doesn't turn out like Candace Owens or the black maga guy dancing in that video.

At the same time, I get what you are saying. I got kind of lightweight annoyed when their class read "Hair Like Mine" because it wasn't until they read that book that they had any notion that some people view their hair as inferior. Sure, some kids need to read the book because of their experience. But my kids didn't (and maybe not in a classroom).

And I 100% disagree with this "we were raised with the self-image of being victims and "less than""

No. No. No. For example, being raised in Black Nationalism/NOI household you are not only taught you are not inferior, but you are taught that you are SUPERIOR to your white counterparts. Even short of that, it is 100% possible to be raised racially conscious and not have inferiority issues.


Finally, not to say I got it figured out. I am not working with a plan really and just kind of winging it with my kids who are definitely in a different environment then I grew up (Ie, sending them to white majority schools). It's not like we sit them down for talks. we do a lot of gentle nudging. I mean, yall can clown me, but I think just having my kid watch Black-ish when they were young was super helpful in having some of those convos or alerting them to certain things so they didn't find out the hard way.

They are in the 7th grade and are really starting to run into the first little racial incidents. They usually come in the form of their little friend group pushing the boundaries on what they can say and get away with.

This week. I heard this story. These kids wanted to form a group where no joke was off-limit. My kids weren't in it and even told another black boy don't do it ("have some racial dignity" my son told him). Anyway the asian kid did it and then of course the white kid cross the line and started doing squinty eye jokes. My son told him to cut it out and he didn't so my son recorded him. white kid freaks out and begs him to delete it. My son says nah I am going to hold onto it, you should act right going forward.

My kids didn't want to tell us about it because they thought we would go to the school and complain about the kid. We didn't because we felt like we liked the way my son handled it. In fact, proud of how he handled it (yes this is low key stuntin). We also don't mind that our kids will continue to be friends with this kid. . Some might think it's important to escalate to the school the other kids parents, at this age, we think it's important for our kids to know to check folks when it happens, and if stops, keep it moving. My boys don't need the stress of a schoolwide scandal.

Anyway, all this is to say, be careful with that post-Black stuff.




>We're in a COMPLETELY different world right now...and what
>worked back then, doesn't work now.
>
>We have NOT explicitly talked about racism with our children
>in the same way that we were "taught"....or should I say had
>fear instilled in us from a young age.
>
>No matter how you slice it, despite all the talks about Black
>pride, perseverance, turning the other cheek, being strong,
>etc., etc., etc....we were raised with the self image of being
>victims and "less than". I don't want that for my children at
>all. We haven't figured out a way to teach them about racism,
>at this young age anyway, without them forming a false
>impression in their young minds of how that aligns with their
>identity.
>
>We are doing our best to raise them human, citizens,
>individuals, Americans, children of Mr. & Mrs. FLUIDJ,
>grandchildren, part of a long history.....and wrapped up in
>all of that is of course their Blackness. We are teaching
>them that they need to move in this world focused more on the
>friends that they make, and the people that they DO like and
>that DO like them rather than the people that don't. The goal
>is for them to get it in their heads that those people don't
>matter and time shouldn't be wasted on them...white, Black,
>black, or anything...


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

but it is a good way to spark conversations about race or see kids in scenarios where race is a topic.

2 years ago we had an AirBnb a block from Dr Kings house. We took them to the museum and it was difficult to answer some questions.

When my daughter said she wanted to march I fucking lost it. Burst into tears.

I do get what he is saying regarding not wanting to turn kids into victims but at the same time, when they come home and say they don’t like their hair I know its because of seeing white girls with long hair.

We have to address these things BEFORE the world does IMO.

Wanted to add I mentor a young Black male at my kids school. He’s big, he’s Black. First thing I said to him regarding getting in trouble is Black males and how we are treated in classrooms. I’m not going to skip over that shit like its not important. He has a white woman for a teacher and I can tell by the way she described his issues that he is “one of those bad Black boys”

I have two girls...no boys.
We've pretty much done the same by both of them from ages 0-7...

1st Thing:
The 11 year old never been hung up on hair or fashion and outward appearances in general....

The 7 year old, ALLLL about appearances and hair.

Now they both went to the same pre-schools and elementary schools.. Same demographics...Arlington is known for being white, but we have them in a lottery public school with probably the best mix of demographics you could hope for here....66% minority enrolment, with those minorities being black (Ethiopian, Eritrean, Somalian), Black, Latino, and Asian)... I say that to say that her hangup and focus on hair and appearances is largely because she sees such diversity in dress (Hijabs), hair textures and languages.

2nd Thing:
Youngest is 1st grade with a 22 year old white teacher from the mid-west. This year has been trying.... Our 7 year old ain't no punk...and WILL voice her opinion and WILL assert herself. That's been problematic for this young snowflake teacher...so we're navigating that in a child centric fashion rather than pulling the race card. We want daughter to know that she has to maneuver through her day in compliance with the school guidelines and teacher's expectations. We don't bring race into our discussions with her..... but when we go see the teacher and principle (3 times this school year so far)...we DO let THEM know that we watching them from racially loaded angle.


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

our children. We see validity in it and have measurable results as well.

I haven't assigned a title to it, that's you and all them other folks just trying to coin some shit for fame and recognition....I think titles are silly. Nobody renames the earth over it's millions of years of evolution....it's just accepted for it continues to evolve into.

Black is and Black will always be.

Not sure why you're concluding that anyone is cutting off their past. If anything, it's a conscious assessment and acknowledgment and calculated decision to advance the approach on our existence. This is a result OF learning.

You don't teach math by starting with the equations and problems....you start with the numbers. They'll learn about racism,
but we're not approaching it the way our parents did.

I remember making a post 10-11 years ago when my first daughter was born asking for book recommendations that don't beat you over the head with blackness. It was poorly worded for shock value of course, but there was validity that i'm sure now some folks get where I was coming from since a lot of us have kids now vs. back then....regarding that specific book, never been a fan of it. There's no real reason to teach a child, at the age group it's geared towards, that others hate or don't understand their hair....We own 2 copies because we support Black folks...but we held off on reading it to both of our girls for a while.

When I say "We" I'm talking about ME and my WIFE...that's not a collective we. I was raised in a southern bible toting, church going, Black family of southerners that'd been southerners since being brought over on the slave ships. Wife was similar, but not exactly. I have an arabic name that was a result of my parents being caught up in the movement in the mid-70's, but it didn't stick with them and they reverted back to being just regular Black folk by the time my younger brother was born. I sought out and learned about Black Nationalism as a direct result of Hip Hop in the 80's...they didn't stiffle my exploration, but they also didn't nourish it or encourage it. They allowed it. So i'm sharing MY experience, don't equate it as me making a blanket statement about everyone. We are not a monolith.

I sense that your kids, being in the pre-teen age bracket, are at the prime time for them to be exposed to and educated on racism and race in a way that allows them to be empowered by the knowledge. I personally don't think anything younger than 9 is an appropriate age...which I acknowledge is likely not a popular opinion. Our oldest is 11 and she's at the age where i'm able to talk to her about stuff and i'm confident she processes it in a way that doesn't diminish her self impression. My 7 year old though?? If you tell her that her pants are getting to short she translates that to you telling her she's an awful human being that will never amount to shit because she's rocking highwaters....*shrugs*

Again...none of this is "post Black stuff".


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

and take it back to you prior thing about not being able to talk about race without having a self image of being victims and "less than"; and the only point I really want to make is that there is a way to do it so they see their blackness as a superpower, not a burden.

Even talking about slavery. Binlahab use to say it all the time, the fact that we come from slavery and we are where are now is a testament to how amazing black people are. I could go on.



**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

But I think us 80’s kids had plenty of examples of not turning that cheek unless to 360 with a backhand. Stories of Nat Turner, Black Panthers, Death Angels, that one guy on the NYC subway in the 90’s, the LA Riots, etc. Then theres the things the news avoids to tell but it slips out anyway.

On another note, long as racism exist our kids will more than likely have to deal with it, but how they do is always based on the tools we’ve provided for them.

sentence!?!?!?


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

and Ferguson doesn't belong in the same sentence as Nat Turner, Black Panthers etc., either.

I’m speaking on Black people who were fed up with racism and either organized or had just went into rage against it. Rather it was right or wrong is subjective, because in all the persons mentioned they were wronged by a continued system of oppression against Black people.

And Julia (that was a big one) and Facts of Life, and Diff'rent Strokes, and All In The Family, and The Jeffersons, AND teachers in school, and basically everyone.

Even when I lived in North Carolina and New Orleans and Guam.

We also were taught about bussing and affirmative action in positive ways.

Mom and I talked about it when I was maybe 6? Dad was a little later. Dad lived in Louisiana and had some twinge of "There are good ones" but presented as "There ARE bad ones" but he never expressed racial discrimination or used slurs that I heard in my entire life. (Trust me, I've heard a bunch in the 70's and 80's in the south when I visited for the summer.)

It was a very simple message devoid of the "Well what about the racists rights to be racist? Isn't that reverse racist-ism?"

The amplification of "nuance" and bullshit started in the early 80's and has gotten us to where we are today.

Are you white?

Whoop…there it is.

lol,

I got a serious education in the ways of white folks.

Can only imagine how deep those conversations went.

watch who you hang around/ride around with, and be prepared for white people in the workplace to say and do questionable things

On when was the first and last time you used your parents advice concerning racism?

i laughed at her back then

little did i know...

d

"i do more for both our communities than you'll ever know." - Heinz
"But rest assured, in my luxurious house built on the backs of people darker than me, I am sipping fine scotch and scoffing at how stupid you are." - bshelly

I havent heard that word since the late 1900’s lol

they didn't have to




>Or did you receive an introduction via Eyes On the Prize,
>Roots etc or did you receive a live-action crash course via
>public encounter? How open are you with your children about
>racism?
>
>I finally watched a vid thats been circulating on Tiktok/Insta
>where a 55-60 yr old woman talks about her experience as a
>child and the trauma it brought. She says her mother gave her
>words of encouragement however she still carried low
>self-esteem and just couldnt fathom why white people were so
>mean and evil. It was sad, and I thought about my first
>encounter w/racism and how unprepared I was in not only
>dealing with it but also recognizing it. I would like to think
>Ive prepared my sons much better.
>
>What’s your take?

>
sundown town type shit, still going on in some places too. They hung a black high school kid back in 2017 for having sex with a white woman a few hrs away from where I grew up

but the place where the young man got hung was in Bladenboro. There's a documentary on it called Always In Season

some of those places aren’t attractive at all and I wonder how folks live out there.

Always trips me out when I stop at Smithfields and see light skin girls with that serious southern twang. Where do yall live and how much do yall do it?

>some of those places aren’t attractive at all and I wonder
>how folks live out there.
>
>Always trips me out when I stop at Smithfields and see light
>skin girls with that serious southern twang. Where do yall
>live and how much do yall do it?
>
>

everybody in that area goes to the beach or to Fayetteville to party, you can see everything there is to do out there on your way to Smithfield LOL

my biggest fear is breaking down in one of those towns.

and what is weird is places like Wadesborough are filled with Black folk.

>my biggest fear is breaking down in one of those towns.
>
>and what is weird is places like Wadesborough are filled with
>Black folk.


same with mostly Native American towns like Maxton

I believe everything you're saying...it's "interesting" down there...still

>I believe everything you're saying...it's "interesting" down
>there...still

yeah its wild man, time stands still on all the wrong shit

...I saw/heard all kinds of shit. Felt like the movies...on some "you lost son"?

Interestingly enough, her family is pretty deep in Columbus County. In fact, I think her older brother lives in Bladenboro and he's pretty popular in the community somehow. The duality down there is wild, lol.

>...I saw/heard all kinds of shit. Felt like the movies...on
>some "you lost son"?
>
>Interestingly enough, her family is pretty deep in Columbus
>County. In fact, I think her older brother lives in Bladenboro
>and he's pretty popular in the community somehow. The duality
>down there is wild, lol.
>

I had a friend that dated a white girl from down there, and let's just say he pulled through/backed in every parking space lol

Is the town 2% black? If not then was anything done on the young man’s behalf (sentencing of murderer(s), retaliation by fam or community members)?

but I know as late as 2017 the authorities were still trying to decide if it was a hate crime or not. They tried to say he hung himself

I don’t really appreciate the fact that I didn’t get more information on race and racism growing up.

But I am a healthy adult so I guess that’s the positive and I guess that’s what any parent would ultimately want for his/her child.

Still, my inquisitions have not been laid to rest…

I grew up in Black neighborhoods up until around 13 which I then moved to a more diverse (white & Black) neighborhood.

Went to a Black school up until 4th grade and transferred to a predominantly white school and attended a majority white junior high and high school.

Had Black friends throughout and only socialized with others races solely at school for the most part. I probably went to only one white persons house (a teacher) by the age of 18 and one Asian person’s house and no other races excluding Black.

I’m trying to paint a picture of a life largely impacted by racism but a lack of language to describe it as well as an inability to perceive how it impacted my life due to not having an explanation overtly expressed.

I developed some racial consciousness after going to Washington DC as an adult which is where I heard people speak more freely about racism. I developed more racial consciousness after attending a PWI in California as well as Howard.

It really made me question the quality of my upbringing.

I would imagine I’d tell my kids about racism but maybe that’s because I’m scorned. Not really sure.

I think it’s interesting that some say they were conscientious without being told about it. Also interesting is some saying that a knowledge of racism would lead to an inferiority complex

I wish you insight so you can see for yourself

Does seem odd to know of something without being informed of it first but all of us grew up in tv, particularly 70-80’s reruns, so even if parents didnt say the quiet part outloud, the Jefferson’s, Goodtimes and even 21 Jumpstreet did.

Then again I do recall being 4 and wishing to be like the little white girls in commercials cause it looked like they had everything, from the perfect girl’s bedroom and all the fun toys. I said it outloud and my Ma stopped and educated me on the beauty of being Black and Blackness, but as I think about it now I never wanted to change being Black me, I just wanted the what tv showed me the little white girls had.