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Forum nameGeneral Discussion
Topic subjectGod damn child care is expensive (no duh)
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=4&topic_id=13451723
13451723, God damn child care is expensive (no duh)
Posted by walihorse, Thu Jan-13-22 04:06 PM
My wife and I both work from home. Which has made the last 7 months amazing. Since our daughter has been here, we have been able to witness and be apart of every single moment of her life.

That has been wonderful. I am so grateful for the opportunity to do this.

However, as she's grown, so has the demands for attention, education, naps, and so on. So since work is getting for both of us a little more demanding, we are feeling like we aren't able to give her the attention she deserves.

We had looked into places before she was born.

3 decent daycares near us cost the following.

1 - 8:30am to 3:30pm - $12,650/year
2 - 7:30am to 2pm - 13,000/year
3 - 82am - 5pm - $14,750/year - this one also charges $150 a month for food. $450 yearly registration fee, and $200 for uniform.

We just reached out them again and only the first one has room available. The cost are more if you pay monthly instead of all at once. So option 1 is a cost of $1,300 a month for 10 months aka 13K a year. $1,300 is almost a mortgage payment. Option 1 looks decent enough, but the "play area" is a concrete walled in outside with astro turf on the ground. They have a 1-3 ratio which, I can see why it cost that much.

The craziest thing, I decided to look into qualifications for state assistance and for a family of 3, in FL to qualify you have to be in school and not make more than $32K a year.

That is insane.

I know it sounds like one of those issues that should have been paying attention to, but yeah it can be difficult to see something until it affects you and your wallet.

This shit need to be seriously worked on, cuz continuing to have stagnant wages with increased childcare cost is not sustainable.
13451725, when i was growing up
Posted by luminous, Thu Jan-13-22 04:12 PM
all the kids in the neighborhood stayed with an old lady named Gran
13451726, People really have no idea at ALL...
Posted by soulfunk, Thu Jan-13-22 04:24 PM
>but yeah it can be difficult to see
>something until it affects you and your wallet.

I have a 13 year old and a 7 year old. Back in 2008 when my oldest was a baby I was SHOCKED at how expensive childcare was. At that time we were paying around $1200 per month, for a PART TIME schedule of three days per week. My parents took care of him for the other two days. And this was for a middle of the road daycare in our area - not one of the best at all, but not one of the cheaper daycares.

That being said, the crazy thing is that it doesn't stop when they start going to school. My youngest is in 2nd grade now, and we have to pay $200 per week, so over $800 per month for his before/after school care which is at his elementary school. And don't even get me started on how expensive child care is during the Summer for daycare programs. And having two kids at once? We thought that waiting 6 years for our second kid would make sense from a childcare perspective, but didn't realize we'd be covering child care for our oldest through 6th grade.



13451729, More and more, I see the value of multigenerational homes.
Posted by walihorse, Thu Jan-13-22 04:32 PM
when i was a kid, my grandmom lived with us.
13451730, Exactly. I mentioned that my parents helped with child care.
Posted by soulfunk, Thu Jan-13-22 04:45 PM
We literally bought our house in the subdivision next to my parents to make that work more easily. And we still rely on them HEAVILY.

The other issue with our current culture is that neighborhoods aren't close communities any more. As a kid growing up, we were close to EVERYONE in our sub. We were closer then to folks who lived four streets over to us than we are now to our literal next door neighbors. I have to have my wife remind me of our next door neighbors names all the time. Kids in the sub don't play with each other like we used to.

So that's one of the reasons that growing up in the 80's we were able to be home alone - neighbors looked out for each other. Younger kids would often be at in home daycares down the street. Stuff just isn't the same any more...
13451762, Definitely have to make a strong effort to get to know your neighbors these
Posted by FLUIDJ, Fri Jan-14-22 09:19 AM
days....
I know every hood is different, and I'm sure we lucked up...but we know practically every neighbor on our block, and the houses behind us. We have keys to 3 of the neighbor's house, and they have keys to ours. Our next door neighbors also offered their house to us for 2 months when ours was being renovated and my wife was pregnant 5 years ago.... We lived there for two months while they were on an extended road trip.

Not that it matters...but I guess it kinda does....we're the only Black family on the entire street....I say that to say; 15 years ago, if you'd have told me that I'd be sharing keys with some 60+ year old republican neighbors, living in another WASP neighbors house for 2 months, swapping tools with another old republican catholic neighbor, and waving to random folks that I only know their dogs' name... I'd have laughed in your face...

Unfortunately we had our kids in a time frame that landed younger than our immediate neighbors, and has them about 3 years older than our extended neighbors....so still having zero'd in on any neighborhood friends yet...but I think as they get into the upper elementary school years that'll improve.

13451765, you lucked up to live around friendly white republicans?
Posted by legsdiamond, Fri Jan-14-22 09:34 AM
lmao

I know what you are trying to say but it sounds weird af.

“These some good white folk”
13451775, I mean...when you put it like THAT .... lol...but they're actually an oddity
Posted by FLUIDJ, Fri Jan-14-22 10:34 AM
Arlington is super blue liberal county...there are probably like 10 republicans total in our big neighborhood and two of them just happen to be across the street from us. Old neighborhood....one of them actually grew up in the house they live in now...
13451767, People have more in common than not, and are generally nice
Posted by PimpTrickGangstaClik, Fri Jan-14-22 09:42 AM
But let some people tell it, those neighbors are your mortal enemies and a threat to your survival.


>
>Not that it matters...but I guess it kinda does....we're the
>only Black family on the entire street....I say that to say;
>15 years ago, if you'd have told me that I'd be sharing keys
>with some 60+ year old republican neighbors, living in another
>WASP neighbors house for 2 months, swapping tools with another
>old republican catholic neighbor, and waving to random folks
>that I only know their dogs' name... I'd have laughed in your
>face...
>
13451779, Most people aren’t extremist like the news tries to imply
Posted by legsdiamond, Fri Jan-14-22 10:44 AM
I’ll be honest tho..

I have no idea where my neighbors stand politically and that is the way I like it.
13451770, not child care related
Posted by Ashy Achilles, Fri Jan-14-22 09:59 AM
but our neighbors are fox news-watching retirees

husband always offers to fix things, sharpen mower blades, change mower oil, loan tools, rolls garbage cans from the end of our driveway to our garage door on trash day, etc.

wife is always offers things she bakes or cooks, views my wife as one of her best friends

it is a weird experience, indeed
13451766, I definitely don't miss child care expenses!
Posted by tariqhu, Fri Jan-14-22 09:34 AM
mine are 17 and 12 now, so I'm outta that game. we lucked up when we moved to this area and found a lady that provided in home care. wasn't the greatest home, but she took care of them and they were learning things before pre-k.

my mom and MIL helped a ton. from transporting them around to picking them up to go eat or keeping them on weekends. we needed them. otherwise, it would've been a mess for us trying to work and handle everything the kids needed.
13451784, It would definitely be different if he were older during this pandemic
Posted by walihorse, Fri Jan-14-22 11:09 AM
We are really worries we will be holding back her development
13451773, This is why we retired my mother in law after we had our second
Posted by tomjohn29, Fri Jan-14-22 10:21 AM
we put both kids into preschool when the time was right but those were both part time programs
good luck though
13451774, 2 kids… over $18,500 and we were taking summers off
Posted by legsdiamond, Fri Jan-14-22 10:32 AM
when we did our taxes and they said “damn, that is a lot of money” we replied.. “we know, it was our money”

when friends would say “do you know what you could do with all that money?” we replied.. yes, we know.

real rap, the pandemic was a blessing in disguise for our children finances. It was terrible for their development and stressful for us since we had to work remotely but man, we saved a ton of money.

Now we pay $250 a week for a babysitter for afterschool care.

How is daycare more expensive than an in-state university?
13451778, THIS
Posted by soulfunk, Fri Jan-14-22 10:41 AM
>real rap, the pandemic was a blessing in disguise for our
>children finances. It was terrible for their development and
>stressful for us since we had to work remotely but man, we
>saved a ton of money.

We literally did a full kitchen, dining room, and powder room renovation last summer with the additional savings we had due to pandemic childcare savings.
13451785, RE: 2 kids… over $18,500 and we were taking summers off
Posted by walihorse, Fri Jan-14-22 11:32 AM

>How is daycare more expensive than an in-state university?

This is what scares me!

Yeah, if she were older the pandemic would most likely had been a saving.

7 month old though.... geez.
13451793, Get that 529 started now.. lol
Posted by legsdiamond, Fri Jan-14-22 12:23 PM
I’m sure people are doing better than me but proud to say my kids are 6 and 4 and we have a little over 10K saved already for their college education.

13451799, that's good.
Posted by tariqhu, Fri Jan-14-22 12:47 PM
we started late on those, so they'll have a bit to get started but not like it really should be.
13451807, Thanks.. we started late with the first baby
Posted by legsdiamond, Fri Jan-14-22 02:01 PM
and by late I mean when she was a little but after her first bday.

but then we got aggressive to make up for it

and any financial gifts get thrown in there as well.

but I do recommend having another investment vehicle just in case they don’t want to go to college. I can’t take credit for this tip, I got it from an OKP when discussing investments.

13451806, Oh yea, we started that up in July.
Posted by walihorse, Fri Jan-14-22 01:57 PM
13451808, Nice.. only thing else I can add is good luck and it will be over soon
Posted by legsdiamond, Fri Jan-14-22 02:07 PM
of course more expenses will replace it but none will be this bad unless you go enroll in a private school.

I used to make this post every 6 months when we were in the thick of it. Counting down the days.

That summer break gave us hope.

I will admit that my budgeting has been trash lately simply because we had a surplus. Have to get better because I know my savings should be higher but we are still in party mode.

Prolly the first time in life where I no longer count the days to payday.

13451813, Heaaarddd that
Posted by maro, Fri Jan-14-22 03:25 PM
We are paying... 1600 a month! More than my mortgage. That's 8am - 3:30 - 5days, though we are picking her up at 12 these days so she isn't eating and napping with a mask off at school.

Hard enough having an unvaxxed toddler, add in we are working from home....with no family help, it's a shit show.

Sliver lining like you mentioned.... working from home has allowed me to see her grow these last 3 years.

but 16hundo..... I am def counting the days.... bank account is hurting.

13451931, $1,600
Posted by walihorse, Mon Jan-17-22 09:26 AM
jesus that is a scary number. How is the quality of the place?
13451825, My wife's high school friend owns
Posted by jetblack, Fri Jan-14-22 07:26 PM
a daycare and we get a discount and a unique schedule. $600/mo which include breakfast and lunch.
13451932, ummmm I am Jealous
Posted by walihorse, Mon Jan-17-22 09:26 AM
that is fantastic
13451842, I have a 4 year old daughter and 18 month old son
Posted by calij81, Sat Jan-15-22 12:32 AM
4 year old goes to preschool 8:30 to 5:15 = $1,350 a month

18 month old goes to preschool 8:30 to 3:30 = $1,200 a month

Next fall he will go to 5:15 so I am “saving” money this year.
13451933, $2,550 for daycare is ridiculous
Posted by walihorse, Mon Jan-17-22 09:28 AM
Its wholly unsustainable
13452041, It is ridiculous and I just tell myself that this isn’t forever
Posted by calij81, Tue Jan-18-22 05:21 PM
13452015, Damn, pre-school is free in NC now
Posted by legsdiamond, Tue Jan-18-22 01:13 PM
I think the law passed last year.

Parents who pay for private school. Whew.. yall got that paper.

13452040, By preschool are you referring to Pre-K?
Posted by calij81, Tue Jan-18-22 05:20 PM
Do they take kids as young as 18 months or do you have to be a minimum age to send your kid?

California has free pre-k which my daughter will be eligible for this fall.