Nm

and should be anchored

his own podcast.

he actually dm me and said he was thinking of working on it. i guess that'll never happen.

A few weeks back my boss, who's been an absolute monster during this entire pandemic, lost her mind.

I don't know what crawled into her brain but she gave me "30 day opportunity" paperwork to correct behavior.

The behaviors included things like "you're not engaged on camera", "you weren't available this one time I called you", and "two days after you got back from parental leave in October you didn't respond quickly to an email" ... I wish I was exaggerating about the content of this letter. Ticky Tack stuff that you don't write salary people up for, you just talk with them about expectation. Even worse, we've had an annual and a mid year since 75% of the items in the letter happened. So if they weren't issues then ... what changed?

And here's where it got ugly. The corrective behavior to save my job isn't to address those things. She leaned on SMART goals. She gave me two operational metrics (I'm not in operations) ... that one of my worst performing warehouses needs to hit. I literally have no control over operations. None.


So ... in the last month I banged out what I needed to do to save my job. Which is completely out of the scope of the role and different from what anyone else on staff does. And I've gotten numbers up. But I'm fucking offended. I've only been written up for performance one time, I was 19, working retail, I refused to clean a toilet, and I got written up. That's it. I have 20 years work experience now, 10 years in my field, degreed, and credentialed.


And now my resume is cleaned up, and I have interviews lined up.

I've been with this place for 5 damn years. Some years have been good, some have been dogshit and included corrective action.

The one about not being engaged on-camera...like, what the fuck does any of that mean?

Best of luck to you. Hopefully you can get a significant bump in pay.

What is your role/industry if you don't mind me asking?

That it escalated to this point without pre-emption is wild.
That the reasons she put on paper is insane for salaried job.
That the job role isn't what the job title/industry standard is, is maddening.

I'm a Industrial Engineer II for three grocery warehouses as a job title
My background is Industrial Engineering and I'm a Lean Six Sigma Black Belt with 10 years.

Industrial Engineering as a profession in 2021 is Continuous Improvement. Kaizens, DMAIC projects, quick wins, improvements, sustainability, and PDCA (Plan Do Check Act)

We do none of that as an IE team, none, we do facility layouts and evaluated labor standards. IE work from the late 80s through late 90s.

It wasn't the job that was offered to me and if I had known that's what the work was, I wouldn't have accepted the job.

>The one about not being engaged on-camera...like, what the fuck does any of that mean?
It means that I don't look happy, don't sound happy, and sometimes I don't have my camera on depending on the length of the meeting and if I have one or more of my kids in the house.


But I can't stay. Can't put my money or health insurance at risk. Even worse, I took a management step down and paycut for job stability and I got into one of the safest industries and companies in the country ... and this person is putting all of that at risk.

issued my boss had given me a handwritten thank you letter and a personalized gift. In the document she was like "if you had preformed like this when you first started you wouldn't be here now." I was so confused how did I get a handwritten letter from this person a month earlier that included words like "awesome" and "excellent" and then needed corrective action!?

To make matters worse, she scheduled an offsite lunch for the day before my birthday (I was off on my actual birthday) so I went to this lunch thinking it was a celebration (we always celebrated birthdays at this job) and we had a pleasant conversation. Once the plates had been cleared and the check was on the way she pulled this out her purse.

Yeah... I left that job...

The last few weeks. She's been playing like the paperwork doesn't exist. Being friendly. Asking me to teach the department stuff. Trying to shift my work away from working on those specific metrics. Like business as usual shit.

We're out of town on a project right now. And she pulls me aside and goes "I talked to (my boss) and he says that he appreciates that you've stepped up recently, so keep doing what you're doing and let's get through this"

And I just fucking wanted to scream in her face.

Here's how all of this started. 6 months ago one of my sites was abusing a labor tag. They were authorizing work under a code that wasn't correct and it was making their numbers look funny. I messaged them, talked to them, gave them a small amount of hours, talked to my boss, CCed my boss, CCed my bosses boss, their boss ... they didn't stop. Because I have no authority. 2 months ago I do the same thing. This time my boss follows up on my email. And they stopped using the tag.

And I had told my boss 6 months prior that I needed her follow up, and she didn't. This time she did. And rather than recognize that. I got praise for correcting the problem. Praise. I didn't do anything different than I did six months ago, she did. Essentially what they (my boss and her boss) want to do is manage by reports and emails. We told you what's wrong, we fix it, or we'll escalate it to your bosses. And what the warehouses are telling us is ... we know how to run operations, when you send us this many reports, we're going to argue data, and there's no amount of email or reports that we'll listen to.

So we're at a huge impasse on doing work versus being effective.

So I'm out. Because these aren't wins, the change isn't sustainable, replicable, or could I even put it as an accomplishment. But the numbers moved, for now, and she's happy.

if people see you in the office you are automatically engaged unless you are sleeping at your desk

but if you work from home or have remote meetings people tend to be critical if you aren’t “all up in the video”

I was in a room with a high chair, a bottle, and a sleeping child. I looked like chaos, and for the context of the meeting it would've looked bad. And I told her that. That the optics of my situation weren't good for that particular meeting.

She said that with the VP on the call I should show face, and then she asked her favorite go to "if this wasn't a COVID situation what would you have done"

To which I replied, "but this is a COVID situation, and right now they send your kids home at every cough. They sent my son home because the kid in the next room had a stomach bug and my son had one runny diaper, that's the reality right now"

She's been big on downplaying COVID. Last year I got in trouble for saying that I was apprehensive about going into the warehouses because I'm asthmatic. Her response from April 2020. verbatim (because I document everything) "If you need to consider FMLA, talk to your Dr. about this. We are all going to have to start going back to work soon. The entire team has been going in as needed on a regular basis. If there was no pandemic right now, would you be staying home on account of asthma?"

is about as dumb as it gets. yeah, you gotta quit.

Every other person in the department for the most part is working remotely until the company says so.

She's been all about peer pressure and "equality" ... "if such and such goes in, we need to too"

And that's the exact wrong approach in a fucking pandemic. She's not a smart person.

I'm aware that the rules for Black men are different in this world.

But it seems like she says and does an awful lot of things that, with the sort of documentation you seem to have, would have her ass in the unemployment line with the quickness, were it released to the proper channels.

And I think I have figured out the root of my problem and how I'm in the situation.
She doesn't see the good in anyone. Not a single person. She's not outwardly miserable, but she's CONSTANTLY complaining about people's personal shit like she's letting you in on some inside shit. And she's a boss of like 15 people, she can't be gossiping the way she does.
But she does, and has the whole time.
And within that ... I don't put up with her shit to a degree.
A lot of people are go along to get along. And I've told her "no I'm not doing that" or "that's professionally inappropriate" more than a few times

And within that. She talks to her boss every day. And he's a needy guy. And the same age as us (we're all peers) in fact mine and his kids are both the same age. So you have this gossipy ass person that sees the worst in people, talking to her boss every day, and he's got this whole ass image of me based on her.

So in the meantime what I've been doing is that every communication I send to her now. I forward to him after as an FYI. Just so that she doesn't misrepresent my work. And I also had a 1 on 1 with him to has shit out. I'm not trying to save my job as much as I'm trying not to get fired until I get a new job.

some people are just miserable.

In general, most people are just trying to get through their yearly reviews with as little trouble as possible.

Get paid and KIM.

Most people don't want to do the heavy lifting of dealing with abusive management.

And the reasons for that are plentiful, and many are valid. But I am a firm believer that people like you mentioned, and many others I've seen and dealt with myself, thrive the way they do for two primary reasons:

1. Too many underlings being willing to put up with it, for aforementioned myriad reasons.

2. Upper management all too often doesn't see an issue with it, doesn't care, or requires a perfect victim to take action.

#2 is one of the biggest reasons for #1 IMO.

We have someone who so consistently terrorizes everyone beneath her that if you go to any office, and someone finds out you came from her office, they will launch into their personal horror story about this nameless monster, who will inevitably turn out to be this same person.

She's teflon.

One supervisor was leaving, and didn't want everyone to be stuck with her, so she organized a mass HR complaint.

Well, our director put everyone on trial instead.

Oh, you come in late?
Your stats are low.
You did x, y, or z.

Not a thing happened, and half the people dropped out of the complaint entirely after hearing about the carnage of the first several people that went into discuss the issue. It backfired spectacularly, with the end result being a perception that workers simply don't like accountability.

And I've seen plenty of people like her, who always seem to thrive in such roles. I've always stood my ground and said hell the fuck naw, and I fight the battle enough that I get left the fuck alone, while others get stuck putting up with the abuse. The only time I got a bad result, it was when I worked for a temp agency. Nothing happened, and I finally quit on the job.

Thing is, I had documented so much and done so much leg work with my prior complaints, that I had a long ass chat with a manager, and they wound up taking action after the fact. They told me that others had similar complaints, but only expressed them after they quit or were fired. I was the only person who took it up the chain while I was still working, and so that showed that I wasn't just a disgruntled ex employee.

I think if more people revolt, take that stand and ban together, people like your boss would be gone. But it's not that simple, I know.

I got off on a tangent there. But I hope you get the fuck out soon and find somewhere you can be happy and not walk on that glass each day

Him: yo, lemme chop it with you. are you alright dude? you've been missing some deadlines and you seem out of it.

me: yeah man...my uncle died and was dead for a month and a half before they found his body in his house and...

him: AW MAN, that happens bro. I sat there while my uncle died in my arms. But, you know, life goes on and...

me: *mouthing "what the fuck"*

and he even spoke on being jealous of my relationship with my dad.

my bosses dad was dead for like a month before anyone found him.

It was that moment that I swore to leave in the most epic fashion.

and I did, as soon as I got a new gig I resigned... same day.

another coworker left in impressive fashion a few months earlier too. They kept threatening him because he wasn’t staying late to work. Boss’s wife was yapping at him and he was like “here you go” and handed her a resignation letter.. she read it and said “shit” and walked off embarrassed. She actually told him it might be a good idea that his pregnant wife had her bags packed and was threatening to leave him because he was working hellafied hours.

and when we make that move it always works out better. Go where you are wanted.. and leave when you need to for your health and sanity.

out of management. I was tired of sitting in classes with them and having them bullshit through all of their trainings and then sit in our breakout groups and have them detail horror stories of harassing people.

after 20 years you got to give me more respect than that.. salary too!

foh




@silentintellect

10 as an Industrial Engineer. I came into the department more qualified in our profession than any of the other engineers and I'm being treated in a way that you would treat an intern.

Me and my boss have the same degree. She's 3 years older than me. I'm the one with the lean six sigma green belt and black belt. She's not professionally certified in anything.

only to hear its a money making opportunity I smell an MLM.

it could be legit but I don’t trust it.

and was pushing a lil' too hard..

the vibe wasn't right... i passed

i guess he felt some type of way cause he didn't call back for a while.. we cool but fuck all that


and kept saying "this right here is not an MLM" ... Crazy thing is dude is smart so coming from him, I was kind of like huh???

he didn't mention it when he finally called and I didn't ask..

I'm sure it'll come up..

and I just can’t trust his intentions

could be 100% legit but it doesn’t feel right.

one call is fine but dude was blowing me up.

Talking about "wanting to connect" and whatnot.

Then you get there, and it's an MLM pitch.

Because I can't talk about this shit with people at work.

everybody has a shitty nonproductive nonrewarding nonhappy day
every.
day.
it's rough.
don't even know what to do....
but keep waking up and looking forward to shitty days....
I fear it's going to take years for the kids to recover from this....
4 year old has had the same, boring, lackluster routine for the past 14 months....
8 year old...ditto....

in my feels today....

Like, energy, or financial?

just on extreme autopilot....
every day just feels like a carbon copy of the previous.
same issues with the kids
same issues with the work
same issues with the everything else

Really just need these kids back in school, back in a normal environment, learning things that we simply can't teach them in this environment. Really just need to have the capacity to get on a track of progress...
Just need to have an ounce of meaningful time with my wife that doesn't involve kids, kids education, cooking, cleaning, planning out the next shitty noneventful week, etc. etc....

Did the math yesterday and we literally spend like 1 hr of "quality time" daily...which isn't ideal at all.

"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

and they can’t wait..

and neither can we.

They just needy and over it like we are..

and some days I want to get in the car and go get some milk.. lol.

simply because I’m sick of hearing Daddy, Daddy.. Daddy.

working from home is awesome.. unless if you have young kids.

we trying our best to stay strong....
but fall can't come soon enough.

I'm legit concerned that our 4 year old has acquired some behavior habits that are going to be a problem when she returns to pre-school. Throwing things...hitting, scratching, straight up refusing to do shit. Her recent habit when in a fit of anger is to go around and yank EVERYTHING that's on an elevated surface OFF in the most extravagant and exaggerated fashion. A lot of splatter marks in the house right now....several broken dishes.....no wounds.....yet.

"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

And it’s only two days per week, but You had to elect to participate back in November with an anticipated opening date of March…that was when shit was still crazy so we elected to keep the older one home in remote “learning”.



"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

my oldest just missed the cut off for kindergarten and our day care closed down.

We decided to keep them out until next year.

I’m working from home until my wife finishes the school year.

curbside pickup

stopped the expanded unemployment, banned gov agencies from requiring masks.

someone on reddit joked "He’s going out of his way to make insanely stupid decisions this week. I wonder what tomorrow brings - maybe the elimination of solar panels and wind mills?"

well today he signs law to bar city climate plans from banning natural gas as fuel source. for good measure he also signed the 'fetal heartbeat' bill.

im sure ive missed some hes done lately. im split between staying put and hoping i can help vote him and his ilk out or just moving.

What a fucking year.
Aunt nephew maternal grandfather bunch of extended family passed away, most COVID.
Business is fluctuating like crazy as well as income.
Kids mostly online schooled and losing their minds( and driving us out of ours).
I bitched about it to a friend and he gave me the count your blessings spiel .I had to count to ten.
Father stretch my hands might be the most jarring piece of music ever. Soulful spiritual opening and then that motherfucker talks about bleached assholes. Changes the whole vibe.

https://youtu.be/97tvJs5fQwM



"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

2 min mark.
On a semi related note , I don’t know any choir musicians in real life. I always wonder if this is only worship and they have day jobs. Like the drummer in that clip you posted KILLED it.I picture him staring at a TP report and drumming his fingers on the desk .

lol at the visual of him drumming his fingers on his desk all week


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"

I have come to time it perfectly to turn down the radio long enough just to skip that part. Man damn near ruins (if not ruins) a perfect song.


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

He could have done so much with it.
But he gave us bleach from an asshole on his T shirt.

Kindergarten from a damn chromebook, with two parents working full time, was a bitch. My daughter had some struggles, but she's straight because she already has a foundation.

That, and they have very different temperaments. And he requires a lot of hands on attention with his work. The number of time I've heard him crying, "I want to go to real school, I don't want to go to school on a computer" breaks my heart.

But for all t

Fortunately, he's just borderline, and picks things up quickly, but he struggles to pay attention. Struggles is charitable, lol. Often enough he just has no fucks to give and just doesn't want to do anything. I know this because he'll say, essentially, FUCK these instructions, I'm doing my own thing.

But also, there have been two many days where my wife and I both said fuck it, we give up, and just let him do his thing.

IMO this shit is like, 10% on his bullish temperament, 40% pandemic quarantine Chromebook schooling, and 50% my wife and I not putting a greater effort to overcome our patience limits with him with greater consistency. I'm a shit teacher and that hasn't helped.

But this isn't as bad as it could have been. For that, I'm grateful.

https://youtu.be/wZnF67fCo6g

where can i get a version without khaled screaming on it?