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Forum nameGeneral Discussion
Topic subject** CONFESSION WEDNESDAY **
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=4&topic_id=13420172
13420172, ** CONFESSION WEDNESDAY **
Posted by Geah, Wed Jan-13-21 12:16 AM
Zzzz
13420187, I'm not doing ok
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 09:36 AM
I was a manager at USPS when those pipe bombs came through.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/October_2018_United_States_mail_bombing_attempts

We were sitting in a meeting with the VP, she left to get a phone call, and then the news broke on CNN as we sat in that conference room just trying to figure out what was happening

And we did nothing

We set up meetings for the people on the floor if they needed someone to talk to, established talking points, coordinated with HQ to address the mail, but as people, humans, we did nothing for us. Just carried on.

That was a breaking point for me. It's just mail. But people's push to just be normal in the face of crisis bothers me. I'm not saying wilt, or become heroic, I just don't have the benefit of pretending that a situation I'm experiencing isn't happening.


And I've felt like that since last Wednesday. "When white America catches a cold, Black America catches pneumonia" And a group of white Americans just tried to overthrow the national government, and they're still planning to storm state houses. This is the worse it's been for white America in a LONG time and they're just pretending it's normal. And I'm burnt the hell out on checking white America's temperature to see if I need to run to the ER.
13420190, anyone acting like things are regular right now is off their fucking rocker
Posted by CherNic, Wed Jan-13-21 09:41 AM
I can't even pretend anymore. The past 10 months have been....almost impossible. The way this country has tried to normalized everything going on when we're living in an actual fucking nightmare?
13420194, I'm so behind at work. I keep incessantly refreshing the news
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 09:45 AM
My Trump sign sporting neighbors down the street finally took their shit down, but I don't know the motivation or what's next for them.

I know one is a DV and one is a cop. Fuck if I know what their next life plans are just hope they don't involve me.

13420221, Might I suggest, getting off the news for a while?
Posted by double negative, Wed Jan-13-21 11:45 AM
2016-2019 i was deep on the news feed trough. I couldnt get enough.

now, I'm withholding optimism while admitting it exists and letting my cynicism hold the wheel with worry and concern riding shotgun.

that said, I've taken that news consumption energy and put into audiobooks and podcasts related to our social-political climate.

if you havent heard it, I super suggest the 'It Could Happen Here' podcast https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1119-it-could-happen-here-30717896/

If you're the worrying type, then maybe not. My wife got too freaked out and coudlnt finish it. I devoured the whole series and use what was there as a indicator for When It's Time To Actually Worry ☝🏽.


I have other rec's but it all depends on what concerns you - is it white supremacy or civil unrest or civil war or the culture war or fascism or geopolitics or....?
13420223, ... walk me through how that works
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 11:51 AM
Say white people violently attempt an overthrow of the government today and succeed.

Do I wait until my parents text me two hours later and then try to round up my family within the madness?

If you don't know who folks around you are, you have to be prepared for what they may do and last I checked the people that stormed the Capitol went back to their communities unpunished and they were threatening shit like this

https://twitter.com/MJalonschi/status/1349391710867042305

You have violent insurrectionists around you right now at this moment, if you feel comfortable not tracking the same signals they're receiving then you do you.

Until we have leadership that's on the other side of these folks I am on HIGH ALERT
13420290, i have lots of comforting/terrible ideas about things
Posted by double negative, Wed Jan-13-21 03:01 PM
1. we're not there yet with a successful overthrowing of government

2. I've had my eye on the conservative extremist talk spaces for years now - this ain't it (yet) chief. I've been tracking the signals for a good while.

3. the storming of the capitol was the opening note, not the closing note. I see a line going back from trump/social media accelerated extremism to the tea party and I see a line going forward to...god knows what.

4. If you go back in my post history, this was front of mind for me back in August

5. A week before the capitol riot I made sure we were stocked - I said that I know shit will go down.

6. ON THE DAY, I took a deep breath, opened my browser and waited. Nothing. Refresh. Nothing. Then I thought "I'll hear about it soon" - cue, my wife two hours later saying "hey did you see...?" and me thinking "what took so long?"

7. I was UNDERwhelmed about the events of that day. I don't have my eye on the white supremacist pipeline people - those on the fringes of being willful participants in areas that explicitly state affinity for white supremacy / AKA conservatives / AKA alt right, alt lite because...

8. My nightmare is those who fall in the accelerationist category. These are the people who were planning on attacking their fellow white countrymen during the Virginia gun rally with the goal of making a controversial yet non-violent event into a confusing and violent hell. See also "The Base".

9. A single mass event would likely not be the method. Think of local, seemingly disconnected events. I'm talking about terrorism ya'll.

10. I'm worried but I'm not worried for right now because we're on a longer-term trajectory that may mirror the historical uprising of fascism. The riot was unsuccessful in fulfilling its goal, but it did serve the purpose of raising the bar. People who are otherwise on the sidelines are maybe now more willing to get take action.

11. watching the news is not going to give you a sense of where things really are. by the time its on the news, it's already happened. if you want to pick up on what is going to happen and what these people are thinking, then you have to unfortunately, go into the armpits of the web. All the gross subs, the chans, gab, TDwin, kiwif*rms, etc.

I DO NOT RECCOMEND GO TO THESE PLACES. (if you're not used to it, its shocking, if you're used to it, then by god go outside and hug a puppy)


13420292, Are you white?
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 03:02 PM
13420350, that’s what you got from all that?
Posted by double negative, Wed Jan-13-21 05:35 PM
Either this is gatekeeping or something else.

I’m Black.

I know you do not like me, but uh...what?
13420352, It reads like a white man
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 05:37 PM
I don't know too many Black men that are sitting there saying "we're not there yet."

In fact every single one I personally know is talking about being locked and loaded and on high alert next week.

It's weird that you can look at things right now and downplay it.

Armed insurrectionist attempted to overthrow the government last week and murder representatives. They have largely went unpunished and dispersed back to their communities. Nobody knows what actions they'll take next but they are hopped up on more dopamine before, they are more emboldened than last week when they went up there, and now angrier and more supported.

Furthermore, you don't know who they are and how large their numbers grew. The kind of people that did that have near zero problem trying to get their Dylan Roof or James Jackson on.
13420418, So you are gatekeeping then.
Posted by double negative, Thu Jan-14-21 10:42 AM
>I don't know too many Black men that are sitting there saying
>"we're not there yet."
>

we're not. is this moment extremely bad? of course it is. Does it mean that I suggest you do nothing? Of course not, I assembled my bug-in box back in August. We're just a step short of having a years supply of MREs around, instead we have dry goods and non-perishables to last several months. everything was collected back in march. We're also about to begin firearm training.

But, maybe we have different thresholds for when to worry and what about.



>In fact every single one I personally know is talking about
>being locked and loaded and on high alert next week.
>
>It's weird that you can look at things right now and downplay
>it.
>


If you think I'm not talking or thinking about this as a black man should then...open your mind a bit?

My point is, next week...well, again, I'VE BEEN SAYING THIS FOR MONTHS. Just because I'm not saying it now does not mean its not a concern. I've been figuring out where things are headed not by watching the news but from watching conservative spaces. The news will not tell you what is going to happen until it already happened.

My concern is this, beyond next week, we still have a country filled with angry and upset people. The culture of Q, extremism, white supremacy, etc. is not just going to all say on January 22nd "Well, we tried...is UPS hiring?". Things shift and mutate, ideas simmer.

I'm really worried about domestic terrorism and there being a massive increase in the activity. I'm worried about domestic terrorists becoming more effective.

13420419, You do understand you offered your advice unsolicited right?
Posted by MEAT, Thu Jan-14-21 10:47 AM
Like at no point did I say please help me. You decided to reach out to me independently and make an unhelpful suggestion unsolicited. And now that I'm framing how I view your suggestion, I'm gatekeeping, my own thoughts.

Ok
13420424, You are right, I did offer unsolicited advice. My bad.
Posted by double negative, Thu Jan-14-21 11:48 AM
13420231, man, I'm there, as well...
Posted by Dstl1, Wed Jan-13-21 12:15 PM
everything feels so trivial, considering the state of this country we live in. I'm at work and it's almost impossible for me to care about this shit...yet, my mortgage company aint gonna chill on when that payment is due. Like...I just want to dig a hole. My wife is wondering if the Dec. 2021 cruise we paid for, over a year ago, is actually gonna happen. I'm wondering WTF is going to happen between now and inauguration day...and should a pickup another firearm to stash. I am operating at like 20% of who I am, it feels like.
13420244, I watched the 24 Hours at the Capitol special on Hulu
Posted by legsdiamond, Wed Jan-13-21 12:48 PM
looked like some Lord if the Rings monsters storming the castle
13420259, "DO Y'ALL NOT SEE ALL THIS SHIT GOING ON RIGHT NOW???!!!"
Posted by FLUIDJ, Wed Jan-13-21 01:22 PM
Is what I frequently have to blurt out and just let off steam over the past 10 months...(muting my MS Teams meetings of course, haven't slipped up yet)

Our organization has collectively put on this mask of impenetrability and chosen to maintain the "mission".

It's sickening...tiring...infuriating.

Like...not once has ANYONE simply said.... "How about we just pause...just for a minute."

No processing has happened....

I don't understand it at all....
13420269, the results weren't bad enough to register as the terrorist attack it was
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 01:49 PM
the average person thinks this was just some riled up keystone cops tomfoolery
13420272, Folks are wild. I've been shot at, I didn't need to get hit to change.
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 01:54 PM
13420271, YES! The organization speak is infuriating...
Posted by Dstl1, Wed Jan-13-21 01:52 PM
"we will continue to do it better..." FOH. Folks are hurting.
13420195, i thought way too hard about starting an onlyfans
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 10:06 AM
still am lol
13420206, Those Geico ‘becoming your parents’ commercials...
Posted by Pamalama, Wed Jan-13-21 10:43 AM
...hit a little too close to home sometimes. I recognize myself in 2 people that they’ve parodied.
13420209, lol
Posted by mista k5, Wed Jan-13-21 10:57 AM
13420225, ^Truth!
Posted by Mack, Wed Jan-13-21 11:58 AM
13420245, Word. Those commercials are hilarious & painful at the same time. n/m
Posted by Marbles, Wed Jan-13-21 12:49 PM
>...hit a little too close to home sometimes. I recognize
>myself in 2 people that they’ve parodied.
13420252, you know who else reads books about submarines?
Posted by Dstl1, Wed Jan-13-21 12:56 PM
.
13420287, lol i love those
Posted by Mynoriti, Wed Jan-13-21 02:39 PM
13420230, I am debating on Outing this Person from the Trump Rally
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Wed Jan-13-21 12:15 PM
I posted some of her stuff here before. She was an Obama lover who went crazy Trump supporter because she is a born again Indian Christian. That alone wouldn't be enough for me to put her out there except that she has gone hard against family and she got a lot of notoriety for being a Dem who switched to Trump Supporter. Like WSJ article and Fox Business Appearance. She is mainly a real estate agent for mostly black clients and she would probably get axed if someone shared her deleted tweets of her at the insurrection.

Is it fair game to cost someone their job for some things they post online?


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
13420235, She has access to the SS numbers and addresses of Black people
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 12:23 PM
As well as detailed personal information
She is a threat to their safety.
13420236, hell yeah it is. make her pockets hurt.
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 12:24 PM
13420243, nigga without question
Posted by CherNic, Wed Jan-13-21 12:44 PM
13420249, I think this goes way beyond "stuff they post online"
Posted by Cold Truth, Wed Jan-13-21 12:56 PM
Put her on blast
13420277, Not sure anyone would care.
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Wed Jan-13-21 02:20 PM
She was there.

https://ibb.co/zQ8c8J3

See her twitter profile.

https://twitter.com/RealtorStarShar?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor

See the WSJ article mentioned in her profile where she is featured.

https://www.wsj.com/articles/everyones-a-day-trader-now-11595649609


and for some reason Fox Business loves to have her on

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yDmaItPrAg


IDK. Just seems petty.

I do think she has mental issues. She went from:

https://www.facebook.com/sharmila.viswasam/posts/10154820399981411

to

https://ibb.co/KNvnsm9



**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
13420285, yea she's touched
Posted by Mynoriti, Wed Jan-13-21 02:28 PM
not sure if there's anything to 'out' on her. she seems to be doing it on her own

>She was there.
>
>https://ibb.co/zQ8c8J3
>
>See her twitter profile.
>
>https://twitter.com/RealtorStarShar?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor
>
>See the WSJ article mentioned in her profile where she is
>featured.
>
>https://www.wsj.com/articles/everyones-a-day-trader-now-11595649609
>
>
>and for some reason Fox Business loves to have her on
>
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yDmaItPrAg
>
>
>IDK. Just seems petty.
>
>I do think she has mental issues. She went from:
>
>https://www.facebook.com/sharmila.viswasam/posts/10154820399981411
>
>to
>
>https://ibb.co/KNvnsm9
>
>
>
>**********
>"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then
>they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
>
>"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
13420286, she got those crazy eyes yo!!!
Posted by legsdiamond, Wed Jan-13-21 02:37 PM
13420284, ^this
Posted by Mynoriti, Wed Jan-13-21 02:25 PM
i'm uncomfortable with twitter mob mentality and trying to ruin someone's life over saying the wrong thing, but as you said, this is far beyond that.

i don't know *exactly* where the line is, but right now personally it's anything from the karen anti-masker screaming in Target and up.
13420293, from a security perspective esp. based MEAT's reply
Posted by jimi, Wed Jan-13-21 03:03 PM
Yeah

protect the clients, i'm sure if they found out through some other means..
yeah
13420234, "We stayed together for the kids" did not apply to my family.
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 12:21 PM
On my mother's side, my Grandmother hated Earl with a passion to her dying day. 6 kids by that man, but they were divorced WAY before I was born.

On the other side, my Grandmother was married twice, divorced twice, had 3 kids by 3 dudes in between.

I thought about that today for whatever reason. But I think it's in part of recognizing that I don't have many good examples of successful partnerships outside of my parents. All my Aunts and Uncles been divorced if married at all, that's my normal.
13420250, i think it very much did for my family
Posted by mista k5, Wed Jan-13-21 12:56 PM
my parents stuck together through quite some rough times. their parents were together until one of them passed.

i think its a mixed bag for my uncles/aunts. some have been divorced. i think fewer from my moms side. my mom last her dad when she was 7 i think. wonder if that had in impact.

3/4 of their kids have been separated/divorced now.

i think we saw what they went through and how it made us feel and decided there is a nope point. or thats just the way it went.

on the thanksgiving trip (yall already bashed me about going so lets skip that this time lol) this all kind of bubbled up. we were celebrating my moms bday and my sister flew in that day. they live together. my sister separated in early 2020. my mom ended up going off on her. it kind of seemed to come out of nowhere but she was drunk so idk. i didnt hear what she told her but it was enough to make my sister leave the house walking.

moms was alternating between leave me alone to bawling to everything is okay but at one point she kept talking about how we dont understand how much us getting divorced affects others, kids and her. i wasnt going to argue about that so i kind of just let it be and tried to get her to chill out and sober up. that kind of stuck with me though.

sister did come back and we all moved on but i worry whats still being suppressed.
13420255, We waited to get married because we both came from divorced families
Posted by legsdiamond, Wed Jan-13-21 01:07 PM
wanted to make sure we weren’t going to bail at the first sign of trouble.

I’m part of a Black fathers group on FB. The amount of hurt in these dudes is depressing af. I try not to judge but man, some of these dudes really picked some toxic people to have kids with and are sour af on marriage. ..and yes, a lot of the dudes are also shitty based on their posting style.

13420304, woof. cant speak for everyone but it feels like hard pickings for a brotha
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 03:31 PM
>I’m part of a Black fathers group on FB. The amount of hurt
>in these dudes is depressing af. I try not to judge but man,
>some of these dudes really picked some toxic people to have
>kids with and are sour af on marriage.

one of the questions i get a lot is some variation of "so why are you single & childless at 29?" as if its some sort of flaw in me.
naw i just looked at the market around me and i just don't like a lot of what i see in the women out here. character red flags popping up like fireworks. and my peace will always be more important than companionship for the sake of it.

13420310, bruh, you're in a sweet spot.
Posted by tariqhu, Wed Jan-13-21 03:47 PM
they ask that because they outchea making life mistakes and wondering how you've kept yourself out the fray.

13420316, it damn sure doesn't seem like it
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 03:58 PM
i've had women ask around my circles, after they know my story already, if i got secret kids, a main thing im cheating on, just looking for trouble where there isn't any.
nah sometimes what you see actually is what you get.

just because yall move crazy and used to toxic shit don't assume everyone does, you know?
13420358, that's exactly it.
Posted by tariqhu, Wed Jan-13-21 05:43 PM

>just because yall move crazy and used to toxic shit don't
>assume everyone does, you know?

the expectations aren't so great. so when someone with no baggage appears, it doesn't seem real to some folks.

it'll happen. don't blame yourself during the process.
13420312, DC is the place to be
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 03:48 PM
13420318, love visiting DC, can't wait to get back.
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 04:00 PM
i'd love to make a move there but man that cost of living. i can work my job from anywhere and i was on track to be able to just pick a city and be able to afford it. but the pandemic did a number on the sports industry at every level its not feasible until we can get back to normal service.
13420319, Fair. It was a dang good place to be to date as a Black man
Posted by MEAT, Wed Jan-13-21 04:09 PM
13420246, one of my two best friends...
Posted by Dstl1, Wed Jan-13-21 12:52 PM
been knowing dude since the 1st grade...just texted me:

Bro...what you doing Saturday/Sunday

Chillin with some food and watching football...what's up?

Can I come through Saturday afternoon...I need to talk to you.

Of course. Anything I can do for you, right now?

Had a difficult talk with _____, this morning.

Got it. Cool. I gotchu.

He and his wife have been on the rocks, before...but, they worked through it. Their daughter (only child) graduates from high school in June and is going to college in Mississippi. Damn. I think this might be it. Fuck. I lover her like a sis, too. We met freshman year in college. I always joke that I was the one who hooked them up, in the dining hall, that year.
13420253, These mixed couple commercials upset me more than they should
Posted by legsdiamond, Wed Jan-13-21 01:03 PM
and its not because I have anything against mixed couples..

its just because its so over the top.

another beef I have is with my coworker who is white and super duper liberal woke.

we talk shit about Trump and make jokes about his supporters but when I joked about these God loving Amuuuricans having no issues with a President with a Russian wife when we know damn well 10 years ago they hated all things Russia...

he hit me with the #actually

actually shes not russian, she’s Ukranian.. and gave me a “hey, that sounds racist” look. No shit it sounds racist.. I’m talking about shitty Trump supporters you hoe ass nigga.. lol.
13420261, haha..
Posted by Dstl1, Wed Jan-13-21 01:28 PM
man, my wife and I have a running game where we count how many they show. It doesn't bother me, at all...just seems like it really blew up, this fall.
13420264, I love it. Especially for multiracial children to see them.
Posted by Cold Truth, Wed Jan-13-21 01:31 PM
13420297, they must get a tax break or some shit
Posted by legsdiamond, Wed Jan-13-21 03:09 PM
I saw a commercial with 5 interracial couples in a 15 second clip

and it was in slow motion.

13420299, lol...I think I saw that one, too...
Posted by Dstl1, Wed Jan-13-21 03:23 PM
one of the couples was a young black dude and an older white woman. I think one had a white dude with a black baby.
13420448, I'm embarrassed about a mistake I made a long time ago
Posted by double negative, Thu Jan-14-21 12:42 PM
A friend I consider a brother is from Ukraine. It's an only child thing.

some 15 years ago in front of a whole bunch of people I asked "Yo, what part of Russia you from bro?"

He calmly gave me the "what the fuck are you talking about?" Obama face and said "I'm from UKRAINE bro"

It's like mixing up Tongan with Somoan, Eritrean with Ethiopian, South American with Mexican, U DUN DO EET.
13420263, If you are sending me an email with more than 4 sentences...I.AIN'T.READING
Posted by FLUIDJ, Wed Jan-13-21 01:30 PM
THAT.SHIT.

Fck...

I guess some people cope by immersing themselves in work....??
Do that shit without me yo....


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"
13420268, i told a customer that one time and they wouldve murdered me
Posted by BrooklynWHAT, Wed Jan-13-21 01:39 PM
thru the phone if they could. it wasn't one of my clients but i got roped into some bullshit to cover for one of our jr hires. and the email this lady sent me explaining all the issues just went onnnnnnnnnnn and onnnnnnnnnn and onnnnnnnn

so i called her up like

"whats up. lets talk about your problems and how we're going to fix them"
cool. did you read my email?
"nah i opened and started scrolling and it was so long i figured you could just tell me what the problems are quicker than me reading it
60 sec expletive laden rant ensues
13420273, disagree. sometimes shit needs to be in writing
Posted by CherNic, Wed Jan-13-21 02:09 PM
'I didn't know' AHT AHT. Per my email!
13420283, i'm mostly talking about the past week or two...right now, I don't have the
Posted by FLUIDJ, Wed Jan-13-21 02:25 PM
bandwidth to process much of anything beyond current events....
But in general...some people have terrible writing efficiency skills.


"Get ready....for your blessing....."
"Bury me by my Grand-Grand and when you can come follow me"
13420291, yeah.. these people trippin’
Posted by legsdiamond, Wed Jan-13-21 03:01 PM
I dont write long emails and I may not like long emails but they are necessary to cover your ass at work.

what i hate is a sparse ass email that doesnt translate well.

Dude will want me to make an edit on a webpage and just throw words at the screen. I’m like.. where on the page do you want this shit? Give me some details.
13420317, I hate the lack of details.
Posted by tariqhu, Wed Jan-13-21 03:59 PM
or a bunch of words that never get to the point.
13420388, Yep! And I keep my "receipts" too! Partially because I cannot remember what
Posted by SuiteLady, Wed Jan-13-21 09:57 PM
what someone said in a conversation. I am more likely to get annoyed at conversations that go on and on. Also, because I can refer the the email when they try to act like I didn't tell them something or they didn't say some other thing.

In his situation, if I was her, I would have followed that conversation up with an email that to the effect of "Thanks for calling me today! I am glad we agreed to ..." and I would have recapped the conservation so that later I could refer back to it. Even if he didn't read it, I got my receipt!
13420462, If you are sending me an email, period
Posted by sectachrome86, Thu Jan-14-21 01:31 PM
My work email is just 99% full of email notifications and bullshit. I look at it like once a week. Ping me on Slack if you want something.
13420364, I'd rather be a twice impeached white man than an innocent Black man approached by police
Posted by KingMonte, Wed Jan-13-21 06:16 PM
Justice? Fuck you.
13420414, You'd rather be white?
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Jan-14-21 09:33 AM

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
13420709, Never...but you got me there
Posted by KingMonte, Sat Jan-16-21 06:31 PM
My emotions got the better of me.
13420742, I'm surprised my login still worked.
Posted by Lardlad95, Sun Jan-17-21 07:55 PM

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻