went on the Bolt Bus for a vacation day and so some Elmur Fudd/Tim Conway applesauce head jive turkey was blasting Cardi B like there was no tommorow.

i was laughing because this old White Cat was bumping that Cardi B like he was at the club and dollar bills in the early morning wasnt a thing

Was walking already, but saw a bus coming and I already had a pass, so I figured I'd save a few minutes and ride up 6 blocks or so. Got on the bus and everyone was sitting up at the front looking mad-as-fuck, except for this one guy in the back.

Whatever.

So I got sit in an empty seat in the back near this dude (no one said shit to me, just ice-grilles). That's when I noticed... THE SMELL. Like shit. Like literal shit. Like dude just took shit a few minutes ago right there. Whole bus smelled like shit. Shit just hit me in the face all of a sudden. That deep, saturated shit smell where you feel like you're breathing in microscopic shit particles.

Bus was stuck in traffic so I asked the driver to let me out and got back to walking.

Total distance: A bit more than 1/2 long downtown block.

Don't know why everyone else didn't get off and catch the next bus. This was at lunch, not rush hour.

her mom wouldn't let her. Momma was from the PJ's and married a white dude to get out the hood.

Well, she had to take it with my broke ass and of course there was a crazy lady on the bus. She had this big ring of keys like she was a warden from the cartoons. Every 2 blocks she would bang that shit on the seat in front of her.

My GF was traumatized for a month...

but she also felt like she was Tomb Raider too.. like she survived some real shit.

Later that day her dad said to her mom "she should ride the bus, stop trying to protect her from the real world" of course they had no idea I already had her name tagged up on my bus pass.

my GF had this smile like "I did that shit Daddy, I already did that shit"