too much bleak shit going on in the world right now.

i need some good ol wholesome stories of burgeoning Black (or other?) love.

Saw her in the spot. She walked by me. I hollered.

with legs. She opened up to me one day during one of my holla attempts and told me some real deep stuff. She rarely opened up to people so I would have been a doofus to not take what she was saying seriously. We developed a deep friendship from there on out and the rest is history.

been married 8 years. for better or worse, shxt feels like the worst right now and she ridin' wit a nxgga.

all of us to a party. i hated parties (at that time) and so did she so we noticed each other, but that was about it. the very next weekend, our crew was set to go to the movies. i had one solid fit at the time so i rocked the exact same sh*t i rocked to the party the week before -- and of course, he invited her and her crew smh.

we ended up all walking around the city after the movies and she was responding to my jokes (i have/had 0 game at all). i was in the process of ending another "situation" and i wasnt being forward enough and she told my boy she liked me but i wasnt showing interest. i hit her immediately on the phone and the rest is history. married with one kid 15 years later.

we worked pretty closely and it was a job where i was kind of permanently on call so when there was no calls i was just chillin hanging out and developing relationships with my co-workers.

we worked together about 3 years though before we actually went on a date, even though it was clear there was a mutual interest.

I've always been a bit of an "internet dater". Used to try to get at people via yahoo chats, then myspace and facebook changed the game up and it was a wrap for me. Did try Blackplanet once but my personality was too goofy for that site.

So it's like 2012ish, and I'm newly unemployed, 28, and living with my parents, which buys me some flexibility in my job hunting. Before I was looking to take any job for money, but living with my parents let me find what I was looking for careers wise. I figured if I'm going to move somewhere for work it should also be to take that next step in life.

So at the time I get a job offer in San Marcos (between Austin and San Antonio), Portland, Charlotte, and DC. So I went on okcupid, wanted to see which site would give me the best chance at taking that next step. DC won hands down.

So I moved up here, across the country for this one woman that I had been "on and off" with for years, hoping that proximity would change the dynamic we had, but also knowing that if it didn't work out that I'd be less fucked up.

And it didn't work out. At all. And that hurt. Because at that point in life, that was my dream woman. I thought we were a go from jump, and we'd known each other so long. But hey, that's life, and I'm not the first person to get it wrong and won't be the last.

So I created a profile on okcupid and started looking. I'm weird at times, but I'm no creep. So I didn't move here off the strength of any one profile, just who had the most numbers. And many it just took off from there. DC for a single black man, no better place.

I hung out with a lawyer for a few weeks, then there was a teacher, couple of dates splashed here at there, but my now wife, I thought I could really do some things if we met. So I sent her a message and I worked on it really hard man. I wanted to get it right. I took weeks getting that message. And here's what it said.
"Hey, it seems like we have a lot of the same interests, if you're interested in talking shoot me a message back"
Bam. Weeks.

And she did. And we emailed back and forth for a few months. I'm a slow goer. And I dated and we emailed. And then we were supposed to meet up in December one day (so like three months of random emails) and I was ready because I just stopped with a few people and I wasn't ready to be alone alone for Christmas up here. So I go into work that day, and she cancels on me. Like an hour before.

Now I'm pretty easy going, so I just said "ok, I understand". She'd gotten sick (which was true) but she woke up sick she could've let me know earlier (also true). But I remembered something a friend of mine told me in 2008 at one of my biggest break ups. He told me I never let people know how I feel and that I need to. So I followed up with that email and I said "I'm kind of bummed that we didn't get to meet up, I was looking forward to it"

and
that
message is why she hit me back up in February. Because I sure as shit don't follow up with people that cancel on me on a first date. But I gave it a go. We met up at a bookstore/cafe. Chatted about an hour, she left. We hung out a few times after that. I was still dating, but this looked like it was going somewhere. So I was working on trying to take that next step. Which for me meant, I wanted to be "good". I didn't wanna so much as kiss someone else once we first kissed. And man, some people just throw it at you.

And then one night I'm out drinking with Kwesi, near the house of the teacher, and she texts like "hey, you forgot your chairs" because I had left some $15 ikea chairs at her place months before from a party. But at 1am, she's not trying to get me to come get some chairs, and I'm not trying to go get chairs, but I was gonna go get those chairs you know? And dude asked me how much them chairs cost, I told him how much, and dude goes
"MAN FUCK THEM CHAIRS"

And I went home, and the next day, I said I think we should be exclusive. And she agreed. Dated, got engaged, moved in together the next weekend, got married the next year, got a little one on the way in 10 weeks.


okcupid. she likes free, I like stats and algorithms

props to you, bruh

& congrats on the lil one

She said if you ask for something God will give it to you. Maybe not in the way you want but he will. So you may want that job, but you're not ready. So those skills and build up from working and losing the wrong jobs is part of that.

Now on my best days I'm agnostic. I hope there's a God and that I'm living right and will get to see all my family in the afterlife. That's my hope. But outside of that I do try to take every chance to be a little planned and a lot open to what the moment I'm in is so I can learn from it, to get where I want. And because of that, patience isn't that hard.

I was in a relationship but we were going different directions. One day I see this potential walking behind me and my boy. I stopped by the campus map for some reason and she walked up looking for a building.

I got her number but since she was new on campus she gave me the wrong number cause she barely knew it.

Didn't see her again for a few weeks but finally found her and got the right number. So one day my ex says "I think I know someone who would be perfect for you"

Gotdamn, tell me how you really feel.

Shit was real messy. There was one other dude who had dreads my length and everyone kept saying we resembled each other. Of course this meant more times than not we attracted the same type of natural women on campus.

Anyway, long story short, I linked up with my wife and kinda knew she was the one but since I was just getting out of a messy relationship I tried my best to mess it up.

She was mad loyal tho and the rest is history.

I still remember my ex crying in the commons one day cause she thought I would have a fling and come running back.

NOPE! SORRY, NOT SORRY! WOULDA COULDA SHOULDA...

Ain't that some shit.

... in yo ass for the rest of your life."

program i was running. it was my first job out of college. i was in a relationship when she started working there. i'd hit her up on the AOL instant messenger (right?? haha) and chat etc. the tension was kinda thick, one of those things we both knew but didn't really speak on.

until winter break was drawing near and i knew i had to do some things or she would be gone for a month and then who knows where she/her head would be when she got back to school/Richmond. so i broke it off with the current and told my now wife that i had done so. we started kicking it pretty much right away. now we're 11 years deep in marriage, 13 years in a relationship. our first son turned 7 today, and the little one will be two in february.

she gets me, accepts me for all my shit and lets me be me. it's a beautiful thing.

we worked together. She was actually my boss. I was dating someone and she was single. Just friendly at first but I got promoted and we were now equals and had to work together more. She threw out the hints and I broke up with my girlfriend. About a month later we went out and 16 years later we are still together. 9 year anniversary coming up this month.

Premium? 91?