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Forum nameGeneral Discussion
Topic subjectWhich kind of love would you want?
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=4&topic_id=12932228
12932228, Which kind of love would you want?
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Wed Dec-31-69 07:00 PM
And Let's assume that two people can't love equally.


Go.

Inspired by Phonte tweeting this.

http://elitedaily.com/dating/girl-loves-harder-loved/1288452/

Poll question: Which kind of love would you want?

Poll result (19 votes)
I’d Rather Be The Person Who Loves Harder Than I Am Loved. (3 votes)Vote
I'd Rather Be Loved More than I Love My SO. (16 votes)Vote

  

12932232, -
Posted by Big Kuntry, Thu Nov-19-15 02:40 PM
Nah
12932237, I think you mean red then.
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 02:45 PM

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932244, i find it's ideal (but unsustainable) to have one of each.
Posted by veritas, Thu Nov-19-15 02:53 PM
12932246, Like this?
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 02:56 PM
http://my.xfinity.com/blogs/tv/files/2010/03/SNL-Hot-Tub-Lovers.jpg


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932266, i dunno what that is
Posted by veritas, Thu Nov-19-15 03:10 PM
12932270, Hot tub SNL Skit about the swinging couple.
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 03:12 PM
https://screen.yahoo.com/love-ahs-hot-tub-000000900.html


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932249, blue
Posted by legsdiamond, Thu Nov-19-15 02:59 PM
loving someone more is a horrible feeling...

12932271, You have a kid don't you?
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 03:12 PM
>loving someone more is a horrible feeling...
>
>


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932297, Thought He Just Had One?
Posted by RaphaelSoulLee, Thu Nov-19-15 03:34 PM
Or atleast I thought that
12932317, i have a cat too... how you move the goalpost that fast?
Posted by legsdiamond, Thu Nov-19-15 03:45 PM
your link was about marriage...

the question was presented as one about relationships...

yet somehow you threw the kid out there. Smh...
12932355, Your statement is "loving someone more is a horrible feeling..."
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 04:22 PM
I say it's no different from loving your kid since you probably love your kid in ways the kid doesn't even understand.


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932417, Nah.. im strictly talking SO
Posted by legsdiamond, Thu Nov-19-15 06:05 PM
12932261, just to throw in the stereotype first, it's "Western" thinking or
Posted by c71, Thu Nov-19-15 03:09 PM
tradition that the woman should be loved more because it's felt women can "handle" not loving the male too much since he should be "providing" usually (in Western "tradition").


So women stereotypically are supposed to deal with being "...eh" about their male partners because they are getting provided for.


I know women earn $$$ now but that "tradition" still is sort of "there".
12932290, another aspect to the Western "tradition" is that men have most
Posted by c71, Thu Nov-19-15 03:28 PM
of the "power" and women are an "object".


So the one with the "power" should have the perspective ("desire") that matters. The "object" without much "power" (didn't say the female has no "power" - usually she has to say "yes" to the male's "advances") is "subservient" to being "desired" by the one with the "power".


12932319, that sounds completely wrong
Posted by legsdiamond, Thu Nov-19-15 03:48 PM
western society has women loving their men more because the men is the provider...

and because men are seen as idiots who don't know how to love...

you single?
12932321, trust me, I know tradition
Posted by c71, Thu Nov-19-15 03:49 PM
yep
12932323, it doesnt sound like it but i like your confidence
Posted by legsdiamond, Thu Nov-19-15 03:50 PM
12932353, Google "exchange beauty for money"
Posted by c71, Thu Nov-19-15 04:15 PM
In short, "traditionally" men want "beauty" women want "money".


"Beauty" is the sort of "thing" that men have filled the earth with songs about how much a woman's beauty "blows them away".

Berry Gordy wrote "Money (that's what I want)" and I'm sure some women have wrote songs about wanting money (or a man's "beauty") but it's pretty lopsided (the "tradition" of men writing song after song EXALTING what a woman's "beauty" means to them - inspires them.


I told you I know tradition
12932421, Yall old motown lyric reciting brothas kill me...
Posted by legsdiamond, Thu Nov-19-15 06:08 PM
12932445, I don't think the beauty/power distinction explains it.
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 06:32 PM
A woman can be deeply in love with a dude because of his power. And a man can have a very superficial love for a woman because of her looks.



>In short, "traditionally" men want "beauty" women want
>"money".
>
>
>"Beauty" is the sort of "thing" that men have filled the earth
>with songs about how much a woman's beauty "blows them away".
>
>Berry Gordy wrote "Money (that's what I want)" and I'm sure
>some women have wrote songs about wanting money (or a man's
>"beauty") but it's pretty lopsided (the "tradition" of men
>writing song after song EXALTING what a woman's "beauty" means
>to them - inspires them.
>
>
>I told you I know tradition


**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932458, my point was that "tradition" has shown through the "culture" of
Posted by c71, Thu Nov-19-15 06:42 PM
songwriting throughout the ages, that men are REALLY feeling a female's "beauty".


I don't think that can be denied.


Unless someone wants to come up with a theory that songwriters "traditionally" get more "sprung" with a woman's beauty than the average man.

But...

songs usually "resonate" with the "general" public. So...the public for a LONGGGGGGGGGGG time have been "feeling" male songwriters writing EXTOLLING over and over throughout the ages the "power" of a female's "beauty".


Women singing writing songs about wanting money...not so much.
12932268, If you're quantifying & comparing, you're doing it wrong in the first place.
Posted by FLUIDJ, Thu Nov-19-15 03:10 PM

"Get ready..for your blessing..."
12932281, ^^That good above it all posting.
Posted by Buddy_Gilapagos, Thu Nov-19-15 03:21 PM

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"
12932273, Red all the way
Posted by Teknontheou, Thu Nov-19-15 03:13 PM
12932357, ...which one comes with cheddar biscuits and unlimited blowjobs?
Posted by Mongo, Thu Nov-19-15 04:24 PM
12932422, Blue..
Posted by ProletariatX, Thu Nov-19-15 06:09 PM
12932398, Doesn't blue imply selfizhness?
Posted by Cenario, Thu Nov-19-15 05:17 PM
12932431, Isn't that what it's all about though
Posted by ProletariatX, Thu Nov-19-15 06:14 PM
People may not admit it.. Shit if I'm gonna stay in a relationship I better be getting just as good as I give or more or why bother?
12932448, Right, and wouldn't the other person feel the same?
Posted by Cenario, Thu Nov-19-15 06:36 PM
I guess I don't understand the poll and choices....i wouldn't want either.
12932403, Can't choose. Luckily, generally I experience both at some point.
Posted by Moonlit_Force, Thu Nov-19-15 05:27 PM
12932409, Blue
Posted by ProletariatX, Thu Nov-19-15 05:49 PM
It is the crazy that normally comes with the blue that is the problem .. when they not only love you more but too much of their happiness is tied up in their love for you..
12932453, I'm actually stuck on it. I have realized that shit is NEVER, ever
Posted by -DJ R-Tistic-, Thu Nov-19-15 06:41 PM
ever, ever, EVER, even close to being even.

I like them a whole lot, and they halfway like me or just tolerate me....or, they like me a whole lot, and I just tolerate them. Which is why I haven't made it official with any woman in forever-ever.

And because of that, it makes me scared to go either way. Even this year, I've dealt with women who were super into me to the point that they'd bring me all types of herbal tea and food when I was sick, while I didn't even want to take them out to dinner. And for the ones I was truly interested in, either nothing happened, or they let something minor end things, which meant they weren't in it nearly enough.

So for my own good and comfort, I would rather be the one that loves them more, to where I know I'm at least living up to my romantic potential. Because otherwise, I really can't even force myself to be romantic towards them.
12932457, I've been in love twice, and in each situation.
Posted by Sepia., Thu Nov-19-15 06:42 PM
And I prefer to be loved more.

I trust myself to be careful with a heart so wholly given to me.

I can no longer trust myself to endure the pain of my heart being mistreated if so wholly given to someone else.