I'm shocked...

and I bet I offended so new co-workers but iont care.

I couldn't hide my "oh shit" face..

is it true y'all or are they bullshittin meh?

*that's not some sort of pejorative phrase, his name is Tom and he's my Uncle.

syke

I kid I kid...

but not really

nah, that ain't no reunion, that's Sunday dinner.

I'm talking hotel rooms and last names you ain't heard before.

And crazy old Uncle Jeb pulls out that jar containing his trophy from the time that negro stepped out of line by sass talking. All the while Cousin Myrtle be talking about the good ole' days when coloreds knew their place amidst compliments from the rest of the family on her famous rhubarb marsh mellow casserole?

you never watched a sitcom before?

the ones on the gentile side of my family are vaguely pleasant, i had a good time getting drunk and stoned to get on the level of relatively simple suburbanites. the ones on the jewish side of my family are not reunions but since jews have this obsession with ritual when it comes to death, it's usually when someone croaks. they are usually marked by sadness, tension and guilt. i never go.

While the DJ's spinning a tune as the old folks Carlton dance at your family reunion

>

dude drank like a fish, ate the worst diet I'd ever seen and never did any kind of exercise besides being a mechanic. One day dude was like his big toe was on fire. I said, you got gout. Next day he could barely put his boot on. He was limping bad as shit. Damn near in tears. He went on like that for a week...it would come and go. Finally he went to the doc. That uric acid was kickin his ass, lol.

always funny when you find out you're related to people that you know but didn't realize you were cousins.

White folks can play some ga damn horse shoe!

white kids looked at us sideways when we talked about family reunions..

white dude in my Uber said it was his family reunion, he prolly gave me a line rating cause I straight up told him I was shocked.

we do things different down here.

dont think my family reunions ever had tshirts, but they did involve renting out hotels/cabins/whatever and used to be pretty big. they have since dwindled in participation as the older siblings that held it all together have pretty much all died now. this was the first year that there wasn't one, my mom said last night. i haven't been to one in many years.

at one such reunion when i was probably around 8 my step-grandfather got drunk (he was a drunk. there wasn't even booze like that at the actual gatherings. pretty conservative Christian family) and accused someone of stealing his wallet out of his room and he was being an ass to my grandmother (my mom's mom), so my dad slapped him across the face. i remember that being an awkward night at the family dinner Haha.

this day in age it seems like all the elders who kept the fam together is slowly dieing out. For example my madea had everyone get together but once she passed, all the fam went there separate ways

i really don't know.