i now understand that she didn't want to speak w/me as much as she wanted ME to call HER. b/c by calling her i'd signal to her that she holds some importance in my life as evidenced by my willingness to take time out of my (assumedly busy) schedule to call her.

b/c if she just wanted to talk to me she would've called. if she wanted to know what's going w/me she can get that info from my mother. that's not what she meant when she complained that i never called. i didn't get it then but i get it now. and i'm trying to be better about this issue w/my remaining relatives. but i'm still not great about it. lol