A family member (or friend) you haven't spoken to in a long time (who you have no negative history with) is in the hospital and you KNOW that if you call them, the first thing they gonna say is:

"Oh so i guess i have to be in the hospital to hear from you!"

what you gonna do?

Poll question: What would you do?

Poll result (20 votes) Call anyway and take the lecture (13 votes) Vote Not call...don't feel like hearing that shit (2 votes) Vote Call but pre-empt the lecture somehow (1 votes) Vote not call but send flowers (or something) (4 votes) Vote other (0 votes) Vote

a friend lost his mother recently. they fought, she called him something along the lines of a "f*ggot asshole" so he never called he when she went to the hospital. she died very quickly after without resolving anything and hes all fucked up it.

so.....call

Apart from them being in hospital, why haven't they called you? What's the expectation for you to have called?

it's various other family members that hardly call her that are getting the business over the phone LOL

and it's kinda funny...they are calling me like "um she's kinda cranky"

what you expect? she's in the hospital! i'd be cranky too

d

they never text or call you, but be all up in their feelings that YOU didn't reach out.

.

and always have some shit to say when you call...

but that isn't my problem.

i recently went to a wedding where the first thing the person who invited me said to me was "hello stranger"
i haven't heard from them since......
not even to say thank you for the gift i gave

>i recently went to a wedding where the first thing the person
>who invited me said to me was "hello stranger"

ugh..i've said that a few times...imma stop tho cuz it does come off very judge-y

>i haven't heard from them since......
>not even to say thank you for the gift i gave

ok now that's foul

even though I really dont be callin lol

i now understand that she didn't want to speak w/me as much as she wanted ME to call HER. b/c by calling her i'd signal to her that she holds some importance in my life as evidenced by my willingness to take time out of my (assumedly busy) schedule to call her.

b/c if she just wanted to talk to me she would've called. if she wanted to know what's going w/me she can get that info from my mother. that's not what she meant when she complained that i never called. i didn't get it then but i get it now. and i'm trying to be better about this issue w/my remaining relatives. but i'm still not great about it. lol

However, it would depend who the person is as well as our relationship with each other. I will take the lecture from an older relative, but would say something g snarky back to someone within my peer group.

Communication is a 2 way street. The person should be appreciative that he or she got a phone call from anyone, whether it is due to a dire situation or not.

"so I have to be in the hospital for you to call?"

You - "Yea but not really *insert joke*, but glad you well. stayed blessed."

... just send flowers and a "thinking of you and hoping for a speedy recovery" card.

The older I get, the less patient I am with familial passive aggressiveness.

and jabs from people.

I grew up in a family that was judgey and filled with shit talkers. If they don't talk shit o,ecrack a joke I wonder if they are mad at me or going through something.

my best friends mom was giving a speech and said... "if I don't joke with you or less with you, it's cause I don't mess with you"

"Get ready..for your blessing..."

.

Hospitals can really mess with your head when you're in there. All the death and disease in the air. You need fam around you.

And cause you don't wanna regret not calling later