My girl is from a country part of southern Virginia. So puritanical values and church and no stop lights in the whole town and all that shit. She got some BIG ass black vibrator from a friend of hers when she was like 17. She kept it in her drawer. In the middle of the night the shit starts going off.

Now instead of her thinking it was her vibrator, she thought it was a small animal like a squirrel or something that got trapped in there (again, they are from the country). She panics and went and got her father.

Her father hunts squirrels and deer and shit on a regular (Still does. Country.) so he goes in her room to go and grab the squirrel with his bare hands. He ruffles through the drawer and pulls out a BIG ass black vibrator (country, puritanical values, church, etc) from out of his 17 year old daughter's drawer.

He looked at the vibrator and turned it off, looked at her with a look of disgust, shame and sadness and just walked out of the room with the vibrator.

She never saw it again. They never spoke about it after that.

When she first told me the story, I asked her 2 important questions:

Where did he go with the vibrator?
How did he know how to turn it off?

She gave me what I can only assume was the same look that her father gave her.