I am not judging you if you think that.
I am asking if you feel that way.

I have never felt unloved.

I have felt that ppl in my life didn't have the capacity to help me
(which is why therapists are great.
they don't tell you to man up
and they don't tell you to get out
your feelings and they don't make
it about them).

But I never felt unloved.

And also, ppl that I assumed had no capacity to help actually did.

Ppl in my life that I didn't think
I could ask for help came through when I asked.

Ppl that I assumed could not relate to my
struggles found ways to listen.

Honestly, my life got easier when I stopped trying to do everything by my goddamned self.

And no, the fact that I'm gay has 0 to do
with the fact that the world was not as callus as I assumed it was.

All men, gay and straight, are socialized to be stoic.

But that shit is non-useful unless you
have a gun or knife pulled on you
and it's a matter of fight or flight.

beyond that, it is useful to reach out to other ppl if you are in over your head.
actually, it's good to reach out BEFORE you are in over your head.

I was surprised to find that my father,
who I haven't asked for shit since whenever, was not only able to listen and communicate and offer assistance, but also
was happy that I reached out to him and
lamented the fact that I was so hesitant to do so.


I am not saying that ppl in your life can help you.

I am saying that it's worth it to give them the opportunity to turn you away... because there is a chance that they won't.

that stoic shit is for the birds.

if no longer think it is possible to get where I want to be without help.

I mean, damn.




>men are responsible for all the violence in the world!
>
>men get paid more & get raped less soooo
>
>well, men think emotion is weakness so its their fault!
>
>etc
>
>