Yes, my life is vanilla if this is the kind of thing that upsets me, but it left me feeling upset and even wondering if somehow I was out of line here despite the fact that I was just trying to be reasonably considerate of another parent.

Arriving for parent-teacher conferences, I lucked on a good parking spot, second from pole position (next to the reserved Nurse/Principal/Etc. spots). Only problem was that the car in the pole position spot was several inches over the line into the spot that was open.

I parked. Not a lot of space for the poorly parked driver to get in on her drivers' side, but I had my car as far over to the side of my spot as I could reasonably get it, and she would still be able to get out of the parking spot.

While heading into the building I saw a mom and daughter I recognized heading for the car. I stopped.

The interaction, as verbatim as I can remember it:

Me: "Can you get in? I can back out if you need me to."

Her: "I don't think so. You shouldn't have parked me in like that."

Me: "Well, if you look, you were way over the line; I tried to give you as much space as possible, but let me back out real quick."

Her: "I don't CARE if I was over the line, you shouldn't have parked there!"

Me, getting into my car: "Ma'am, I'm trying to do you a favor; please don't yell at me."

Her: "Control your kids, don't control me! Now move your car!"

Me: "I'm not controlling anyone, I'm just asking you to be polite."

Her: "You don't have any right to talk to me like that! NOW MOVE YOUR CAR!"

I back out as promised, wait til she gets in, then pull back into the spot. She apparently feels this is still blocking her in.

Her: "*yelling something at me through her closed window and my closed window*"

I leaned over to say 'what?!?' and she yelled "MOVE YOUR CAR!!! MOVE! YOUR! CAR!!!" again. I just backed back out, let her pull out, and pulled back in.

I'm not a confrontational guy in the slightest, so this whole exchange took me way by surprise. Even thinking about it later I can't think of anything I could have said that would not have made me feel worse, with the possible exception of 'Look, I'm trying to do something nice for you; if you're going to be nasty about it, forget it." and just gone inside.

Poll question: Unpleasant school parking lot incident

Poll result (33 votes) If she parked crappily, it's her responsibility (25 votes) Vote You were kind of a dick for parking her in, really (0 votes) Vote Not a big deal, until she brought your kids into it (1 votes) Vote don't go out of your way to be nice to people (0 votes) Vote she was outta line (5 votes) Vote you're a total chump (2 votes) Vote

you cant let people ride on that shit. Not necessarily even for your own sake. Its your responsibility to the general public/world to school these dumbfucks so they dont think being loud dumbfucks entitles them to get what they want

>you cant let people ride on that shit. Not necessarily even
>for your own sake. Its your responsibility to the general
>public/world to school these dumbfucks so they dont think
>being loud dumbfucks entitles them to get what they want

I'm not yelling at her in front of her kid.

And I figure if someone can get that angry at ME for a problem where they're the primary party at fault, me yelling at her's not going to do her or me any good.

For the record, I see this mother with some regularity at pickup from the after-care program, and without exception she parks in the fire lane before going inside to get the kids instead of one of the lot spots.

>For the record, I see this mother with some regularity at
>pickup from the after-care program, and without exception she
>parks in the fire lane before going inside to get the kids
>instead of one of the lot spots.


I dont necessarily think you gotta yell. You can be stern, polite and still go off on someone. Especially when theyre in the wrong.

Its hard to do because once the adrenaline gets going its likely to escalate. But you could easy just be like "look i dont have to move for you. I am in the lines of my parking spot. YOU are over the line. Im happy to move my car so you can get into yours, but please address me respectfully, or i'll leave my car rightfully where it is. BTW if you decide to do anything to my car. Ive already taken a picture of the parking job you did and your license plate."

to be quiet, b/c she wasn't listening regardless.

Glad you handled it like a grownup. Reading your story has me wishing you called me up and put me on speakerphone so I could cuss her the fuck out, lol.

>Reading your story has me
>wishing you called me up and put me on speakerphone so I could
>cuss her the fuck out, lol.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeThuYS3Qsw

***
I'm tryna be better off, not better than...

When she popped off at you, you should have left her to figure out her own way to get in & out of the car. And I would have stood right there to watch & see if she would have hit my car with her door.

If she would have said, "Sorry, I was in a hurry/careless/whatever but thanks for backing out to let me in." Everything would have been cool.

> If she would have said, "Sorry, I was in a
>hurry/careless/whatever but thanks for backing out to let me
>in." Everything would have been cool.


as for this, I dunno:

> When she popped off at you, you should have left her to
>figure out her own way to get in & out of the car. And I would
>have stood right there to watch & see if she would have hit my
>car with her door.

I think it would have been useful in a way for the kid to see her mom NOT get something nice done for her because she chose to be nasty instead of cooperative.

On the other hand, I do see this woman regularly at after-care pickup and the last thing I want is for her to make further problems with the potential of those problems happening in front of my kids AND her kid AND other kids.
Unfortunately that does have the net effect of letting her be a bully and get away with it.

>
> When she popped off at you, you should have left her to
>figure out her own way to get in & out of the car. And I would
>have stood right there to watch & see if she would have hit my
>car with her door.
>
> If she would have said, "Sorry, I was in a
>hurry/careless/whatever but thanks for backing out to let me
>in." Everything would have been cool.

as soon as she said you should'nt have parked there you should've walked into the building and away from her

good job keeping your cool.

it always seems like I run into the most loud and wrong people when its just me and my son. Now if its me, my son, and my wife its one thing. But not when we are alone. Usually I don't get to many crazy people because of my size. But when I do it's usually in the car because I am sitting down. Once I was with my wife who was driving around a mall parking lot during x-mas looking for a spot. We are following another car down a lane about 4 car lengths between us. Well this car starts backing out as the car in front passes it. He stops and tried to go in reverse to get the spot. We couldn't move because there were 3 cars behind us. So he honks and my wife just points to the cars behind us. He starts backing up closer to us to let us know to move. When we don't move he honks again. Then he yells at my wife to back up. She yells back that she can't. I was in the passenger seat laughing because shit was funny. Then he gets out of his car and starts walking toward our driver side. I was like no the fuck you didn't get out of your car! I jump out of the passenger seat as he gets to the front of our car. He stops and looks at me. I said get the fuck back in your car asshole. He immediately turned around and sped away. My wife parked and we went shopping. Dude was real brave when he saw a woman driving. But I pop up and all that courage was gone.

(mas)

or something average?

i ask because if your car is average or below, you coulda carried it differently.

you coulda been like YOU KNOW WHAT, I WAS GONNA MOVE TO HELP YOU OUT BUT SINCE YOU GOT AN ATTITUDE, I'M NOT MOVING NOTHIN. GET IN YOUR CAR HOWEVER YOU CAN AND DRIVE OUT MY FACE AND OUT MY LIFE...

but then again, most people park fly whips far away from entrances because of situations like this...


***
I'm tryna be better off, not better than...

>or something average?
>
>i ask because if your car is average or below, you coulda
>carried it differently.
>
>you coulda been like YOU KNOW WHAT, I WAS GONNA MOVE TO HELP
>YOU OUT BUT SINCE YOU GOT AN ATTITUDE, I'M NOT MOVING NOTHIN.
>GET IN YOUR CAR HOWEVER YOU CAN AND DRIVE OUT MY FACE AND OUT
>MY LIFE...

Yeah, I thought of that.... AFTER THE FACT. *dammit8

Red is my vote....
but a more thorough response may be necessary...

My gut reaction was to include it but I feel even worse if I make it out to be about that.

don't mind me.....

if that clears things up

Not that that's an excuse for her to act tye way she did, but when people react way out of proportion to a situation, it's often about something else.

.

These are the kind of people that NEED to be corrected but you let her slide.

Now she's just gonna keep doing this shit.

I would verbally gutted her carcass right in front of her kids. Her kids need to know when their mom has crossed the line too.

That's just me though.

This is why they put camera's on phones.

>Her: "I don't CARE if I was over the line, you shouldn't have parked there!"

At that point I would have taken a picture of the way she
parked along with her tag and walked my too busy for this
shit self away and wished for something to happen to my car.

She was wrong and you handled it the right way.

█▆▇▅▇█▇▆▄▁▃
Big PEMFin H & z's
"I ain't no entertainer, and ain't trying to be one. I am 1 thing, a musician." � Miles

"When the music stops he falls back in the abyss."

on camera and shit.

When I walked in the check-in administrator was like 'what was that all about?'

█▆▇▅▇█▇▆▄▁▃
Big PEMFin H & z's
"I ain't no entertainer, and ain't trying to be one. I am 1 thing, a musician." � Miles

"When the music stops he falls back in the abyss."

Negative opinion of my kids somehow? Like... Does her daughter not like mine, or she knows my older kid is a spaz, or she disapproves of me having fun when I pick them up or something?

Weird, overall.

..regardless of your approach, it never ends well.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

Maybe she perceived that I did, though. *shrug*

..in her mind, you were in the wrong for parkin' that close to her (regardless of your point). by mentioning her infraction, you were reprimanding her driving skills.

most adults hate being corrected when it comes to driving (or parking).

she was simply unreasonable & irrational. there's nothing you could've said that would've helped. you made the best move by simply moving and allowing her to leave. at least your car isn't damaged.

*shrug*


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

>she was simply unreasonable & irrational. there's nothing you
>could've said that would've helped. you made the best move by
>simply moving and allowing her to leave. at least your car
>isn't damaged.

as much as part of me would have loved for the school cameras to have gotten that on tape (assuming they show the lot)...

Guarantee you would feel crummier if you yelled at her in front of her kid.

And into the building.

Fuck that.

Like "oh. Never mind."

But still had my phone ready to record so crazy shit like her smashing her door into my car

Your claim to moral high ground there seems air tight

>Your claim to moral high ground there seems air tight


I've also been wondering how she would have framed the situation to an interested party, how her account would differ from mine.

That is, assuming she had an interested party to go home to. My wife's first reaction was "She's probably divorced & hates men now."

The "i dont care about the thing i did wrong, but im angry at you for doing nothing wrong" routine is a dead giveaway for someone who lives in their own little world

You did something nice for someone. She didn't appreciate it or even acknowledge your effort and that's not your fault. It doesn't make you a chump either. We can't dictate other people's reactions and had you known she would have behaved like that maybe you'd have made a different choice, but you didn't know. You were kind for your reasons not because she deserved your kindness and sometimes that has to be enough.

You didn't really lose anything so don't keep reliving the situation. She's probably moved on the spread her misery elsewhere. You could have given her a lung and afterwards she'd probably tell you the shut up with all your wheezing. Now that you know the next time just lean back on the wall and videotape her exit to make sure she doesn't damage your car.

Or you can look at it like she's a miserable person who may have had to deal with some miserable circumstances in life and maybe misery is all that she has to spread. You were compassionate and didn't add to her joyless cloud.

>You didn't really lose anything so don't keep reliving the
>situation.

She wouldn't have lost anything, either... worst case scenario (for her) is she would have had to get in on the passenger side and climb over to driver side. Which really isn't a big deal.


>Now that you know the next time just lean back on the wall and
>videotape her exit to make sure she doesn't damage your car.

Haha, certainly not planning to park her in again... especially since when I see her parking to get her kid from after-care, she's parking in the fire lane.

Not looking forward to coming in to pick the kids up same time as her, though.

>Or you can look at it like she's a miserable person who may
>have had to deal with some miserable circumstances in life and
>maybe misery is all that she has to spread. You were
>compassionate and didn't add to her joyless cloud.

Definitely possible.

you handled it well, thought.

>
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
instagram:
http://instagram.com/0kayndc

"There is much temptation to use what has worked before,
even when it may exceed its effective scope."

"Roll me further bitch"

if you don't then keep walking...

like what is the point of parking there if you feel so bad about it your'e going to stop and go back and move your car? that's stupidity. just park somewhere else or circle until someone else comes out if you got time for all that.

generall y if i park over the line 2-3 inches its because the person on the other side of me did. they move and then you look like you're parked bad, but you were in the middle of two cars / so far over because the other person was.

>if you don't then keep walking...

Interesting perspective though, and not w/o sense.

>generall y if i park over the line 2-3 inches its because the
>person on the other side of me did. they move and then you
>look like you're parked bad, but you were in the middle of two
>cars / so far over because the other person was.

This is a possibility in this case, but a remote one; the kids had a half-day b/c of the conferences, so the nurse's spot had likely been vacant since well before the woman would have arrived and parked(poorly) in the spot next to it.

Fuck her and everything she believes in

God gave you a gift wrapped opportunity to spazz clean the fuck out on somebody and what'd you do? Fumble it.

Smh

That ain't gonna turn out well for him regardless of the facts.

He got just as much a right to his parking space as she did to hers, except she wasn't in hers, she was half in his.

He tried being polite she kirked on him I wouldn't give a damn what color she or I was show your ass imma show mine but whatever

This is the only way to deal with these ingrates:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bv_bEwfZM-M

After that initial berating, I would've gone super-asshole and not moved and just stayed in the car. Or done some asshole shit like get out of my car while she was still boxed in and walk to the passenger side of my car and get in the car...hop on the phone or some asshole shit like that. She would've been screaming at me and I would've just looked at her and nodded.

I would've been late as hell to wherever, but would've been well worth it.

but she stepped out of line REAL quick. I wouldve cussed the shit out of her and let her deal with it. I wouldve taken a picture of it and said If i see a scratch on my car you'll hear from me, take the license plate and all that. You were being nice and she chose to be a cunt, I wouldve went out of my way to fuck with her.


____

TWITTER : Heinz21st

IG : H_N_Z

You shoulda just sat there and laughed at her and maybe told her how silly she was being. Stupid people hate it when you laugh at them or point out their stupidity. If you wanted to really troll you coulda recorded her backing out.

Really my best passive aggressive strategy is to find some kind of way that people like that realize that you don't take them seriously in any kinda way.

People do shit like this because someone somewhere allowed it to happen. There is no reason for someone to be an asshole like this face to face. The moment she started acting up, I would have left my shit smooth there and dared her to touch my car.

Prob would have knocked her down a notch because it sounds like she's not used to people using her own style of crazy against her. Willing to bet she would have shut up real quick.

peace & blessings,

x.

www.twitter.com/poetx

=========================================
I'm an advocate for working smarter, not harder. If you just
focus on working hard you end up making someone else rich and
not having much to show for it. (c) mad

Few things in life as rewarding as tightening someone up over having a loudmouth cunt for a gf/wife

you got a white man showing up WITHOUT his kid for a conference.

SHO HATE IT!!!!

It's not easy being a man sometimes
You can be on the receiving of violence you didn't even instigate...just because

Like when a dude says "You need to check your woman!"
He's basically asking you to chose between your safety and your woman respecting you

Forever classic scene:
http://youtu.be/eQLXYu6plhg

She was the type that didn't mind showing out in school grounds, in front of her kid, etc and u most certainly woulda came out looking worse or being more frustrated

"Don't fight an ugly person, becuz they have nothing to lose"

then walked into the building and not said nothing. and if my car was damaged when i left, i would have called the cops.

no the fuck you not about to act a fool.

or you could have hit her with the "is this how you always act in front of your kids" man she would have been heated and you would have been all types of MF'er.

thru the passenger door....

Laughing, like it was all a big joke.


That would have set her the fuck off. I gotta remember to do that whenever I get a car, and someone gives me parking lot static.

I would have taken a photograph with my phone, took down her plate just incase she tried to damage my car by opening her door, and let her know that I documented it, and then I would politely tell her to f*ck off while I walked away whistling the clown theme song.

and i only think it was chumpish bc of the 2nd pullout

again fuck her...and her kid

not really but kinda...cause i can't stand a loud and wrong confrontational asshole

i'll literally see red

i tend to acquiesce out of shock but after that first pullout i woulda ripped her a new one