I'm finally at the age where the signs that what life you have after this point is gonna be bullshit compared to the years prior.

Never knew that I could be such a hypochondriac. Shit has thrown me off work and life for weeks now. I've found that the worry was indeed founded to a degree. It could be worse; I could have fuckin' cancer and be worrying whether I'd be around at/past 40 to see my siblings. Still, if I want to be around when that time comes and beyond, I gotta get it together and be vigilant. Ain't tryna go out like Bernie Mac. I already started on that path when I first was worried.


I don't think I've had a real new "virtual crush" in forever. But I found a woman on Twitter/IG who favors someone who used to post here (also one of the few from here who have my "government name" and phone number), who is a Volvo fanatic, a Volvo WAGON fanatic, even drives the same year and model Volvo as I. I didn't think a person like this actually existed. Admiring from afar.

Closely related. It's a woman (who I highly suspect is a lesbian) that I've wanted to screw in passing since adolescence. I can't understand why, either. She is not the usual case of "dudes wanting to hit but she gay" either. Cameras should have caught the look I had on my face when I last saw her in person, and she threw me into an impromptu hug after not having seen her for years (most folks know I'm not for the PDA), and I allowed it. Very few women elicit -that- degree of a response. I wonder if there's a pattern I can follow. It's not ever that often I'm that inspired.

Cavs suck.
Eagles 'bout to start sucking if they don't change soon.
The Jays could be good.

Nothing matters until I'm sure I'm back on track.

New mantra: Now Giving Less Than 10 Fucks A Year, Can't Afford Zero No More.