man... our baby is 5 months
and we are still trying to adjust to everything still
our marriage is still not as popping as it used to be
sad face!

how long did it take you first time parents/
or when you had your first baby - for your marriage to bounce back?
I mean... we are intimate here and there
but obviously not as much as before... just feels like its been
a long time already
___________________
Nas >>> your favorite rapper's favorite rapper

Uh...its a transition. Lets just say sessy time has been few and far between and we are trying to get better at making time for each other.

My child is almost 3!!!! So, put that into perspective!!! :)

Seriously, its not easy. But, if there is any advice I can give is don't take each other for granted. Make sure you give your spouse that affection. Especially if you know they crave it. Try to make more time to talk each night after your munchkin is in bed. Speak their love language (the 5 love languages was very helpful for us). Let your spouse know that just because the baby came into your life, they weren't put on the back burner. Make time for love.

The sooner folks realize that, the sooner they can cope.

>just because the baby came into your life, they weren't put on
>the back burner.

crazy.. bickering like weve never done before
and his mentality is "Baby 1st" above anything and everything
im okay with that
but he doesnt get it that we have to get our marriage back up n running
uuughhhhhh
___________________
Nas >>> your favorite rapper's favorite rapper

it can take a couple years honestly. main thing is to acknowledge the relationship and show support for the individuals. the time will come for rekindling, but it will take some adjusting for the new circumstances. real talk the otherside may actually be better than where you started out pre pregnancy.

█▆▇▅▇█▇▆▄▁▃
Big PEMFin H & z's
"I ain't no entertainer, and ain't trying to be one. I am 1 thing, a musician." � Miles

"When the music stops he falls back in the abyss."

I swear all my outings now are therapy sessions between the guys.
Everyone shares stories.
We are our own support group.
We are each other's sponsors
Like AA
So when we are ready to choke slam her because she swears up and down you ain't changing the diaper correctly or you don't have the bottle at the correct angle when you feeding the baby, you get up call your sponsor and have them talk you off the ledge.
They will tell you that they too have been thru this and that your misery has some company.
They will also tell you the next four things your wife will say or do within the next twelve hours
And like clockwork, everything they said she would do, she did it TO THE TEE.

How you gonna get your groove on when you are crib training and every few minutes the kids wake up in the other room and she run down the hall to put the kid back to sleep?
Our even worse it is your time for night duty and you sleep with one eye open to be ready to calm the baby down

Sick baby's just take shit to the tenth level.

Ahhhhh

Date night with another couple but you got to bring your kid cause you don't have a sitter and don't want to cancel on them the third time in a row.


Out of my sample of a bakers dozen marriages, 12 of them are the same.
It's like we all married the same woman or these women be trading tips and tactics because they all say the same shit verbatim!


No offence.
I'm sure y'all women say is men say the same too.

>So when we are ready to choke slam her because she swears up
>and down you ain't changing the diaper correctly or you don't
>have the bottle at the correct angle when you feeding the
>baby...

the best advice i got from a homie was to not let the baby turn us against each other. keeping this in my head is the only thing that keeps me from snapping daily. gotta remember yall are in it together lol

I still gotta come through to say what up to Hudson Mohawk.

My wife thinks so and will let me hear it
I just laugh my head off

Not sure if anyone else went through it but first time mom's be on some super over protective shit

Like she act like I'm the uncle or step dad
LoL

Outfits I pick out ain't fly enough
Ok. I don't care. Her mom's dress better than me.
So what. You pick out all the outfits then and I will put them on her.

Oh, you say I'm putting this small ass shirt over her head too rough?
Gtfoh, all babies react like that

Once a dude learns to roll with punches like that, his life becomes easier.

You got too much applesauce on the spoon you going to choke her!
LoL
I'm like muthafucka it is APPLESAUCE she will swallow that shit like spit and KIM



When you got somebody mixing old wives tales and shit they read on the internet, it make for an interesting household.

especially the first time

change so much with a child. it makes it really difficult to get back to what it was. so you'll have to find ways of getting in when the baby is asleep or a few more trips to granny's on the weekends to buy some adult time.

the biggest challenge is not being tired AND finding the time.

i say this to all first timers. do. not. wait. because each time you have one all these things you're going through now reset themselves and if you think it's hard the first time, get to the otherside of it then find yourself wanting another and thrust back in the thick of it, with an older kid already. that shit is no joke.

█▆▇▅▇█▇▆▄▁▃
Big PEMFin H & z's
"I ain't no entertainer, and ain't trying to be one. I am 1 thing, a musician." � Miles

"When the music stops he falls back in the abyss."

i've always said that people shouldn't even be allowed to breakup during pregnancy or within like a 10 months of birth when shit is tense. hormones are all out of wack and returning to normal. when basically the couple are put into a whirlwind of circumstances out of nowhere and are prone to take the stress out on each other.

You can't get divorced while pregnant then they make you wait Styx months post pregnancy

U can file
But it won't be confirmed until six months post partum

told her our kid is doing really
time to be my wife a little bit more
she got defensive a bit at first but realized i was right
working through it....but cute kids will have you losing yourself

Yes they will. Their cuteness is the devil! :)

That's if the couple is extra neurotic about their first baby(they usually are).
That's also if they are aggressive about making time for themselves (they usually aren't).

Good luck!



>man... our baby is 5 months
>and we are still trying to adjust to everything still
>our marriage is still not as popping as it used to be
>sad face!
>
>how long did it take you first time parents/
>or when you had your first baby - for your marriage to bounce
>back?
>I mean... we are intimate here and there
>but obviously not as much as before... just feels like its
>been
>a long time already
>___________________
>Nas >>> your favorite rapper's favorite rapper

stay strong

I didn't go to the gym much in 2014
I let myself go
I'm not big
I actually lost weight but gained a few percent in BF so you can only see shadows of my abs

I don't feel sexy no more
It's mainly sleep deprivation
I ain't had a good night of sleep in 9.5 months
It's like every other week baby got a new milestone and we adjust our lives to fit it

She is walking now at 9 months so we have had to re arrange the living room to accommodate for this
She can get to shit faster so can't be laying stuff down
Not even a glass or bottle of water because she WILL attack that shit

She needs new sippy cups as she has progressed

She got teeth now so food choices and textures have changed

She communicates to us more like a child now so we adjust

But yeah, I don't feel like that 22 year old stud no more
Nigga feeling 30 and shit

No more going out getting stupid drunk then coming home to bang that thing out
You come home after midnight you better enter as quietly as possible and lay your ass on the couch until sunrise!

Don't even think about kissing your baby with liquor on your breath

All this responsibility has sapped my sexiness

I can't even hug my wife on the couch without my daughter running over and wanting to get in on the action
I was like damn girl, she was my wife before she was yo momma!

Keep it sexy!

>
>I can't even hug my wife on the couch without my daughter
>running over and wanting to get in on the action
>I was like damn girl, she was my wife before she was yo
>momma!

EXACTLY! My daughter stay C-blockin! My husband still think it's cute but shit sometimes I want to rub up against the D!

It happened to me.

**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

http://blackpeopleonlocalnews.tumblr.com/

Get back in the gym. Seriously, the endorphins will kick in and you will feel sexy in no time.

I had that happen to me. It didn't help that I had weight on before my baby weight. 35 lbs lighter. Now, I'm feeling more like myself. And, my sex drive has definitely picked up. Just gotta stop and make time for love. Its so important.

It's difficult adjusting to the constant demands of a third party - or two, or three.
You're both exhausted all the time.
Her body may have changed very significantly, affecting self-image, affecting intimacy, affecting desires, affecting marriage happiness.
The kid won't eat.
The kid won't sleep.
The kid shits 30 seconds after you change her diaper.
The kid jerks his head as you're carrying him through a doorway and bangs his head and screams.
The kid is playing with you, looking you in the face, and all of a sudden lets loose with a wicked headbutt right to your kisser.

You'll wind up getting blamed for all kinds of shit that is just not your fault.

Add a little possible post-partum depression into the mix.

Yep, it will test your marriage, your character, your relationship.

Good luck. It gets better.

After the baby goes down, it's just us and some wine. It doesn't even have to be sex. It's just time to reconnect as spouses, not parents.

2.) Getaways

Baby turned six months right around Christmas. Met the parents in Atlanta, passed her off and spent the weekend hanging out, shopping, dining, working out, etc. It cost a grip, but it was worth it.

Bottom line: If you do not purposefully build 'us' time, your baby will suck it all away.

>After the baby goes down, it's just us and some wine. It
>doesn't even have to be sex. It's just time to reconnect as
>spouses, not parents.
>
>2.) Getaways
>
>Baby turned six months right around Christmas. Met the parents
>in Atlanta, passed her off and spent the weekend hanging out,
>shopping, dining, working out, etc. It cost a grip, but it was
>worth it.
>
!!!!!!!!>>>>>>Bottom line: If you do not purposefully build 'us' time, your
baby will suck it all away.