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Forum nameGeneral Discussion
Topic subjectheteros: someone of the same sex keeps looking at u:
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=4&topic_id=12687632
12687632, heteros: someone of the same sex keeps looking at u:
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-69 07:00 PM
whats ur first assumption about what is going on here

i recognize there are A LOT of variables to this, where you live, how the person looking at u looks and acts, cultural ideas etc but i like polls and the options are limited

Poll question: heteros: someone of the same sex keeps looking at u:

Poll result (36 votes)
they must find me sessy (5 votes)Vote
they may know me from somewhere or think they do (19 votes)Vote
i got something on my face/my clothes are messed up/noticing my mole (6 votes)Vote
they got a fucking problem and it might be time to knuckle up (4 votes)Vote
they the law (0 votes)Vote
a friendly face in awe of my greatness (i'm white option) (2 votes)Vote


12687634, do they have gay eyes?
Posted by double negative, Wed Dec-31-14 07:36 AM
12687637, thats one of the variables to consider
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 07:42 AM
12687639, You tryin to capture some young lad?
Posted by deejboram, Wed Dec-31-14 07:43 AM
Get it girl!
12687635, Where is the "they gay but I'm sexy" option?
Posted by deejboram, Wed Dec-31-14 07:39 AM
Yeah everybody is gay until proven innocent to me

Including the light skin guy with green eyes standing waaaaay too close to me in line at sephora yesterday.
12687638, Oh I'm sorry you said hetero, but I'm better tho
Posted by deejboram, Wed Dec-31-14 07:42 AM
12687642, bleu
Posted by Bruce Belafonte, Wed Dec-31-14 08:01 AM
12687678, in LA that's problems. In New York it could be a lot of things
Posted by T Reynolds, Wed Dec-31-14 09:13 AM
I've had drugged up white motherfuckers on the train staring dead at me where even staring back didn't 'wake them up'

had to wave my hand in their face maybe for 30 seconds before they snapped out of it and quit creeping me out

there's a lot of eye contact in NY and it took me a while to get used to it. you learn there's a lot of reasons for it. could be curiosity, relation, anger, recognition, familiarity, looking for cues, a lot of things.
12687716, yeah it definitely depends on locale as to what it could be
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 10:02 AM
12687688, they like my style
Posted by DavidHasselhoff, Wed Dec-31-14 09:27 AM
12687691, yellow
Posted by SimplyHannah, Wed Dec-31-14 09:29 AM
She must gotta proll'em
12687895, U the only female that replied! Thanks. I was hoping for responses
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 12:13 PM
From both
12687704, *just* happened to me at the gym...
Posted by murderbear, Wed Dec-31-14 09:45 AM
I was on the treadmill tho', so maybe I was asking for it (jk)

This dude is giving me this intense stare like he knew me, and it threw me off cuz homeboy was YOKED to the max.

Caught him looking again like five minutes later. Fuck

Twenty mins later, I'm at another station and I see him approaching me

"Hey man, did you go to xxxxuniversity?"

I look down, realize I got a xxxxDad tshirt on, it all makes sense now

Although, I was quick to throw my daughter in the convo...like the way women will mention their boyfriend randomly when they feel you're tryna holla..lol..I was a bit ashamed of how quickly I did it too.

Anyway, cool dude, I guess.
12687714, LOL!
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 09:59 AM
12687721, so I'm at the gym right
Posted by infin8, Wed Dec-31-14 10:05 AM
This Hispanic dude walks up to me while I'm in the middle of getting tottaly ripped; he compliments my fade and asks me where he can get a cut around here. I tell him, then I finish my set.

I wondered if it was a pass. Nothing overt sexually that I can tell. I go in my wallet and give him my barber's card. He says thank you. We bump fists and I go on about my business.

Did he make a pass at me or nah?
12687891, wtf nah man. bros just want to get brospective on where to get
Posted by T Reynolds, Wed Dec-31-14 12:09 PM
their fades

I got a new dude in the gym that will ONLY come to me for spots on bench

Like "you gonna be around for awhile? I got 3 more sets and I need you bro"

That's part of the fellowship man. There's weights involved.
12688318, This made me laugh.
Posted by Brew, Thu Jan-01-15 01:17 AM
>That's part of the fellowship man. There's weights involved.
12687723, Blue.....if it keeps happening yellow
Posted by ambient1, Wed Dec-31-14 10:06 AM
12687743, lol
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 10:21 AM
12687793, ^^^
Posted by kingjerm78, Wed Dec-31-14 11:01 AM
12687810, pretty much...
Posted by BigJazz, Wed Dec-31-14 11:15 AM

I'm tryna be better off, not better than...
12687823, Yes to this.
Posted by Case_One, Wed Dec-31-14 11:23 AM

"America, stop turning our Court Houses of Justice into Dens for Justified Murderers."
12687978, Agreed
Posted by ThaAnthology, Wed Dec-31-14 01:26 PM
12687733, i was that guy last night. at applebees
Posted by southphillyman, Wed Dec-31-14 10:11 AM
but it was because they took down the rack that holds the big sangria glasses and the flat screens
so i'm sitting at a circular bar with absolutely nothing to look at
i was in the niggas across from me face all night
i ain't fitting to tweak my neck or be in my phone all night on some insecurity shit
nigga got a problem then say something otherwise foh and eat yo wings
12687742, lmao
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 10:20 AM
12687798, Lol!
Posted by Amritsar, Wed Dec-31-14 11:08 AM

12687906, CRINE
Posted by ShinobiShaw, Wed Dec-31-14 12:26 PM
12687920, ^^was posted up like AI, with an 'OCK' jersey on
Posted by murderbear, Wed Dec-31-14 12:46 PM
12687921, LoL
Posted by Benji, Wed Dec-31-14 12:47 PM
12687999, LMAO
Posted by cgonz00cc, Wed Dec-31-14 01:37 PM
12688313, were you alone or accompanied by african bols ready for whatever?
Posted by ConcreteCharlie, Thu Jan-01-15 12:44 AM
12687747, That's almost always yellow
Posted by Cold Truth, Wed Dec-31-14 10:24 AM
12687773, it means you've captured their attention.
Posted by Joe Corn Mo, Wed Dec-31-14 10:49 AM
in some heteros, you may be capturing their attention
because you are stirring up some inchoate, vaguely homoerotic desire for male closeness in them.

but a lot of times it's not even that deep.

they just noticed something about you that they want to look at more.
it's a totally unconscious thing, and you are likely more aware of it than he is,
because a huge portion of how gay men feel each other out has to do with eye contact
and analyzing the gaze of other men.

truth is, it's impossible to really know where his head is at
without subtly pushing the boundaries in terms of how you react to him
and see how he reacts (standing in closer proximity and seeing if he's uncomfortable,
looking him up and down and seeing how he reacts, etc.)

but you can't make an accurate read now because you need more information.

but the fact that you are even asking this question
gives me the impression that you may have some interest
in this hetero...

and unless you are prepared to deal with the obvious and not so obvious emotional complications of subtly seducing a straight dude, i'd drop the matter completely
and leave his thoughts in his head and not try to figure them out.

this is definitely a do as i say, not as i do type situation.
because while i carry a torch for no one,
there's usually always a straight/ mostly straight/ possibly
closeted gay person that i have on the back burner of my emotional life...

a stew that i am constantly bringing to a simmer, perfecting the seasoning,
always aware that at some point, both of us may be ready to eat a little bit of stew and get it in.

i dunno how "healthy" that is,
but i still do it just because i'm always curious about how that could turn out.

if my past is any indication,
the best case scenerio is a passionate, explosive consummation
with a dude that is still just as uncomfortable with the idea of
gayness as you were when you were 12 years old.

since i am now 32 years old, i can't say i am about that life the way i was
when i was a younger, less confident gay.

but i still flirt with dudes i like in this subtle way
as if i may hit jackpot.

but i don't invest myself in those types of relationships emotionally
for the same reason i don't quit my day job planning on
beating the house in a Las Vegas Casino.

continue to pursue gays in your real life,
making every attempt to give them your full attention,
but if you do decide to play this game with a straight dude,
don't prioritize it because there's a 98 precent chance that nothing will ever come of it.

^ that's me projecting 100 percent of my shit on you.
i dunno what's going on in your life. but hopefully that helps.
12687805, no i think u misread the question, im asking what do heteros
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 11:13 AM
think first when someone of the same sex keeps looking at them? not asking what it means when a man keeps looking at me

but im glad u got to share.

long story short what prompted this post for me was i saw the finest dude ever in the gym yesterday and altho im not a creeper i couldnt stop stealing glances at him and he caught me a couple of times lol

i have pretty good gaydar (like u said the eyes usually give it away and i live in atlanta) and he didnt strike me as gay

i was just curious as to what he might have been thinking

and i havent lusted after str8 guys in the way u seem to be talking about since i was 18 (i'm now 30) plenty of fine gay men in gay friendly spots available.
12687856, ahhh.
Posted by Joe Corn Mo, Wed Dec-31-14 11:43 AM
i dunno.

that's a good question.
12687774, Yellow when I was under 21 or so, blue & red after that
Posted by 8-bit, Wed Dec-31-14 10:49 AM
Back in the day, I used to get *heated* when some dude would keep looking at me for no reason (yellow). Over time, I realized that I'm really tall so a lot of people look at me because of that, or I look like someone they know (happens all the time), or some dudes just really find me attractive. *shrugs*
12687813, I just chalk it up to them being a weirdo and keep it moving
Posted by Chanson, Wed Dec-31-14 11:16 AM
12688323, ^^^^
Posted by Boogie Stimuli, Thu Jan-01-15 03:00 AM
12687855, I'm going to walk up to them and start preaching Mormonism to em.
Posted by Lardlad95, Wed Dec-31-14 11:43 AM
That takes care of all situations.
12687875, Lol
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 11:59 AM
12687902, where's "they're probably an OKP"
Posted by Rjcc, Wed Dec-31-14 12:19 PM

www.engadgethd.com - the other stuff i'm looking at
12687926, red
Posted by JellyBean, Wed Dec-31-14 12:51 PM
as in they like what I'm wearing...
12687928, "Aye... You know me dude?" is my typical response to this
Posted by PoppaGeorge, Wed Dec-31-14 12:53 PM


forcing myself to actually respond to you is like bathing in ebola virus. - Binlahab

Like there is stupid, and then there is you, and then there is dead. - VAsBestBBW

R.I.P. Disco D
12687956, (c)Riley Freeman
Posted by ThaTruth, Wed Dec-31-14 01:11 PM
12688023, Lol u damn right. And u finally made a worth while reply
Posted by blkprinceMD05, Wed Dec-31-14 01:45 PM
12688113, if you dont like me, you must be dykey.
Posted by Binlahab, Wed Dec-31-14 02:57 PM
man, woman or child, young or old, gay or straight. if you got it, you got it & i got it in spades

so when gay dudes stare @ me i nod & smile & KIM. same as i do when everyone stares @ me. shit, look @ me i'd stare too

does it really matter?

for all my fans who keep my name in their mouth: http://i.imgur.com/v2xNOpS.jpg
12688319, happen to me a few years ago
Posted by wluv, Thu Jan-01-15 01:41 AM
im walking with my niece and daughter in the mall when they decide to walk inside this pink girlie store. I wait outside while they in there looking around. im outside the store keeping my eye on the store theyre in. There is a kiosk in between my vision of the store and my area. After ten minutes, some russian dude at the kiosk walks over to me smiling and asking me my name. I tell dude right away im looking at the store behind the kiosk, just watching my kin.

He wanted me but i killed that ish right away. It was then i realized he thought i was staring at him the whole time.
12688324, niggas finna ask me where i'm from.
Posted by IkeMoses, Thu Jan-01-15 03:17 AM
12688327, i always get this. i say 'earth'. no bullshit.
Posted by Deadzombie, Thu Jan-01-15 05:01 AM
12688336, ^^^Lil Halfdead, smartmouthin whole gangs n shit.
Posted by murderbear, Thu Jan-01-15 09:02 AM
12688346, RE: heteros: someone of the same sex keeps looking at u:
Posted by Tiggerific, Thu Jan-01-15 09:52 AM
I can be comfortable with someone of the same sex finding me sexy. But, I know its probably just that they think they know me from somewhere :)